i have a date with leader jae

If asked what she can gain by insulting her ex-boyfriend by real name, Shuangye can answer very clearly: happiness, or very happiness.

However, for this rare happiness, he only used a simple sentence, and the trace of positive emotions was extinguished by the sand like a burning fire in the furnace, and even the sparks were instantly wiped out.

He immediately called Shuangye back to the days when he was in Siberia.

"I'm sorry, Shuangye."

When he opened his mouth, he didn't scold Shuangye, but just apologized belatedly.

It was this sentence that made all the words Shuangye originally wanted to say disappear from her throat in an instant.

He really understands people's hearts so well that Shuangye is aphasia while holding the phone, feeling for a moment that she is not talking to the person on the other side, but is fighting fiercely with the emotional memory she misses in the past.

His voice is highly recognizable, and will inadvertently reveal a noble and elegant quality, giving others a high-end enjoyment for no reason.

Perhaps it would be more appropriate to describe this kind of timbre with an elegant instrument such as a cello, but in the bottom of Shuangye's heart, it is easy to think of the sound of the balalaika that he used to play for himself solo at night.

Even Shuangye has to admit that the beautiful boy named Dostoevsky is knowledgeable and talented, and his cultivation and knowledge are far better than everyone she knows in her simple life experience.

At that time, the balalaika was only a popular musical instrument in Russia, commonly known as the grand piano.

Obviously his pair of delicate hands should be used to play more elegant stringed instruments, but even this kind of niche instrument, he can also play it with ease.

Swan, Moonlight Variations, Fantasia.

At that time, there was always heavy snow fluttering outside the window, and the white winter snow accumulated all over the world, cold, but unexpectedly warm.

The time when the teenager sat in front of the fireplace and played Schumann's Confession for her with various instruments, was always as beautiful as a secret she kept in her heart alone.

It's a pity that the illusory obscurity and beauty described in the memory eventually went to extinction because of the contradictory ideas of the two who were destined to be incompatible.

"Feja."

Shuang Ye, who was leaning against the window, finally lowered her eyes and called out the most special and intimate name for both of them.

All of a sudden, she didn't want to think about anything anymore, and only secretly left a feeling of nowhere in her chest.

That's exhausting.

"You know why I'm calling you again."

Tosi was silent for a long while.

He deserves to be silent, because this matter was planned by him alone, and even Shuang Ye was expected to take the initiative to find him.

So he only asked one of the simplest things: "I sent you flowers, do you still like it?"

It was good not to mention this matter, but when it was mentioned, it ignited the fuse of the Frost Leaf minefield again. She took several deep breaths on the spot to stop the urge to immediately turn the words into reality.

"Like—like so much I want to fly back and screw your head off."

Shuang Ye condemned towards the phone with a blank face: "I was supposed to be the most gentle woman in the whole world, but when I met you dog men, I couldn't help but get irritable day by day."

It's a pity that Tosi didn't seem to intend to accept this unreasonable accusation, and his tone was as calm as the calm sea: "But I treat you better than Bai Lan, and I have never treated you badly, have I?"

"But Trash Prynne never concealed that she wanted to use my mind—"

An extremely tense voice quickly came out from the gap between the teeth of Frost Leaf.

Her state at the moment is probably extremely abnormal, but the more annoyed she is, the calmer her voice becomes, as if all the negative emotions have been cooled down and suppressed into a straight line, along with the pain she expresses along the gap between her lips:

"And you've been cheating on me all along - with your love, false promises and companionship."

"Just because I'm the only one with access to that [book], right?"

Lifting this false veil personally, the result turned out to be far more bitter than Shuangye imagined.

When she was nine years old—that is, the day Odasaku decided not to become a killer and change careers, she accidentally picked up a [book] with all blank pages.At that time, she didn't know that this was the root of the world, and because of the influence of Zuo, she tried to write a story on it with herself as the protagonist on a whim.

For the reason that she is also a killer, she logically wrote an encounter between the killer and the target person for the protagonist, so from that day on, she established an invisible but inseparable connection with the other two in the world.

If you want to sum up the first half of the plot in one sentence, it starts with appearance and ends with character.

Young and ignorant, she was obsessed with sadomasochism at the time, and she only remembers going through a series of routine and bloody love twists and turns with the target person. The protagonist finally chose to leave his side and met another even more in the next country. A handsome young man.

【He is the most beautiful and fragile creature of the opposite sex that I have ever seen in my life. Even the light snowflakes seem to be able to overwhelm his spine.And I was just a lonely bird passing by his window by chance when traveling far away in the cold land, and I couldn't even bear to stay on his shoulder, but when I saw him, a Siberian fairy, I was still willing to be lured into living in his window In the white house. 】

【Do you want a home? 】——It was the last sentence he said to "I" in the [Book], and it was also the beginning of everything that originated from the two of them four years ago in reality.

But before she had time to write down the half-finished story with the ending, the [book] was inadvertently lost by her.

Although she never specifically wrote the names of the other two characters in the [book], but only used vague nouns to refer to them, the reality was staged as promised when she was 16 years old.

She knows better than anyone that the results of things that can realize human wishes are not all good things, but are the source of pain for her.

Now if Shuangye is asked to look back at the remaining pages that were not continued at that time, she will probably be able to guess the ending.

——It's nothing more than the fact that the wings of 'Asuka' were broken, or his white house was blown up because he couldn't bear it anymore.

Just like his lofty ideal, it is destined to face the dawn of destruction.

"I know you don't dare to provoke me completely because I still have value for you."

I only heard Shuang Ye's indifferent description without emotion, probably the ultimatum in this relationship:

"Don't force me to contact you again, Fei Jia, it's not good to turn back. As for what you want, I will find it here for you according to the agreement before leaving, provided that I don't see you talking to me again. People around you take action—remember this for me, otherwise I won’t be merciful. And if you can’t find it in the end, just try to pray yourself, you should be very good at this.”

This summary is more ruthless than any words Shuangye has ever said, but she can only hold the long blade without a handle tightly, and face the opponent even though her palm is dripping with blood—only in this way Only then can you protect yourself and ensure that the darkness in your heart will not flow out.

Tuo Si was silent for a longer time than before. Maybe her words were too sharp and without any sympathy, or maybe even he showed an acquiescing attitude.

It was always difficult for Shuang Ye to figure out what was going on in the mind of this man who was used to holding scripts.

It's really hard to figure out people's hearts. Occasionally it's just a matter of taste, and after a long time, only exhaustion remains.

And Dostoyevsky stares into the abyss of human beings.The closer it is to his heart, the gradually clear truth will only make people feel more painful.

But the sick and beautiful young man who had been vividly in her memory avoided answering her words, and only at this moment slowly and actively dissected a sentence of truth.

"—You still hate me, Shuangye."

It was such a true sentence that the solid barrier she had worked so hard to erect almost collapsed again.

In fact, the person who is extremely good at guessing people's hearts should always be him.

"Stop talking..." She had a vague premonition and didn't want to hear any more.

But the other party didn't care about her feelings at all. At this moment, he was the most ruthless devil in the world, and he kept persuading her in her ears, as if he was personally inflicting the cruelest punishment on her.

So the bird that strayed into the white house was stabbed bloody by the barbed wire he made up in words.

"I told you with my own mouth, dear Shuangye."

On the other side of the phone, he lowered his voice very low, like an inadvertent sigh, his tone of pity was almost enough to melt into the dark and cool night outside the window:

"Love and hatred are never opposites, but always coexist and depend on each other."

"The hatred is so strong, it is because of love - so you should also be very clear that you still love me, this is an absolutely undeniable fact in your subconscious mind."

"..."

Shuangye's extremely lengthy silence made people think that she had forgotten the fact that she was on the phone.

The words that Tosi once said to her at the beginning: [Do you want to have a home? 】

It is a curse from which there is no escape.

But damn it, this sentence has a fatal attraction to her.Even though she has experienced many setbacks, been deceived one after another, and started to feel timid, she still has a meager hope in her heart.

——I hope that someone in this world can give her a stronger hug when she takes the initiative to hug her, and someone will hold her ten fingers tightly to accommodate all her anxiety and loneliness, so that her wandering island can dock forever.

She just wants someone to love her, why is it so difficult to realize this wish...

Every time I try my best to give, until I finally see the buds blooming in front of my eyes, what I get is bitter fruit.

Ah Zuo always misses the right timing, and the difference in identity and philosophy has always drawn a gap between them.

Bai Lan has always had that careless and frivolous personality, and because of a sudden attack of secondary illness, she wanted to rule the world, but was severely taught by a junior high school student.During that time together, even Shuangye herself didn't understand whether he ever had a moment of sincerity.

And Tuosi, as he himself said, is indeed very good to Shuangye, but he is the one who has done the best.

Because she really stepped into the trap and paid her true feelings for it.

Shuangye's supernatural ability [Island] can arbitrarily expand and manipulate a special subspace through its own mobilization.

This ability can basically isolate her from any physical damage from the world, but it can't resist the psychological damage.

Dostoevsky, he easily found the flaw in her ability without any effort at all.His ability to manipulate people's hearts is far from the threshold, and he is really ruthless.

So Shuangye surrendered.

But he brutally opened the scar.

"Shuangye, you have always been very nostalgic and dedicated, and you are the type who will devote yourself to a certain relationship once you confirm it—"

"..."

"Otherwise, you wouldn't have never changed the password set as my birthday, and you wouldn't have taken away the pendant I gave you during the confession, and left it in the corner because you were upset when you saw it."

—Is this guy spying on her life? !

Shuangye, who was completely right, took a deep breath, couldn't help it, and couldn't help raising the volume——

"So what? If you say these things to pick up the last question, I can tell you the whole thing right now—loved, no money, regret, save my mother."

"..."

Obviously, Shuangye has tried hard to maintain a calm tone, but unfortunately it still failed.

"Stop dissecting me without permission, Fei Jia—"

No matter how calm and desolate a person is on weekdays, once they are on the verge of a critical point, they will show loss of control on the edge of their brows.She has tried her best to restrain herself from venting her emotions, only revealing a trace of repressed pain in her words.

"No matter what you are trying to prove here, it doesn't make any sense anymore-for this relationship that has ended. Ex-boyfriend just shut up for me."

But just before Shuangye was about to hang up the phone, she caught Tosi's cold voice in her ear.

It's a rare, submissive gesture.

"Can you forgive me?" he asked.

Facing the bitter scene of his ex-boyfriend's attempt to get back together, Shuangye only replied "hehe".

"Okay, you can write your full name on a hundred pages and let me see it first."