secretary attack

Some love does not necessarily have an answer, does not necessarily have right or wrong; it just calms down over time, gently let go, and deeply buried.

--Inscription

I met Jiang Anxi in the coffee shop next to the school's writing building.

It was drizzling that day and the weather was not pleasant.I had no intention of writing, so I made myself a cup of cappuccino, sat in the corner of the coffee shop and listened to the music played in the shop.

I like this coffee shop very much, and it happens that the owner of this shop is my relative.So I often use my free time on Thursday afternoons to come over and help out.But she only helps one day a week, and she doesn't let me do it if there is too much, but allows me to come and experience life on this day.I also come here to sit and sit when I have nothing to do at other times, drink coffee, write articles, and live a very comfortable life.

For various reasons that day, there was no one else in the cafe.When I heard the piano piece of Stefanie Sun's "Encounter", the door opened with a "crash", and the wind chimes at the door jingled, and then I saw Jiang Anxi walking in with an umbrella.

To be honest, I was amazed at the first sight of her.

She's the kind of girl who looks so good that you can't believe it's a girl.

I remember she was wearing a set of Zara casual clothes that day. Although she was holding an umbrella, her short light chestnut hair was a little wet from the rain, she looked very sexy, and she had the feeling of a handsome Korean guy.

She seemed to be here for the first time, looked at the store carefully, and then finally locked her eyes on me, which made me a little suffocated.

She slightly hooked the corners of her lips and smiled charmingly.She said, "Are you the boss? I

There is something I want to talk to you about. "

Honestly, I couldn't believe she was a girl if she hadn't spoken.

I shook my head foolishly, "I'm not the boss, the boss is not here. But you can tell me if you have something to do, I'm her relative."

"That's it." She rolled her eyes, "No hurry, I can wait. Can you make me a cup of coffee?"

I nodded, stood up and asked her, "What do you want to drink?"

"Have a chocolate latte," she said.

So I ran to the kitchen and made her a latte.

Latte is not the same as cappuccino, it can even be said to be the complete opposite.Cappuccino is the main ingredient of most espresso coffee, with only a layer of milk foam on top; because it looks like a monk of the cappuccino religion, it is named cappuccino.Latte is a combination of milk and coffee, and the amount of milk in it is greater than that of coffee.

When I came out, she was already sitting where I was just now.Seeing me approaching, she moved and motioned for me to sit beside her.

I handed her the latte and sat down, and I asked her, "What do you want from the boss? Can you tell me?"

"That's it." She said, I want to make a movie with the coffee shop as the main scene.I saw that there is a coffee shop in the school, and I just took a look around, and the scene is not bad, so I want to talk to your boss. "

"Do you want to make movies?" My eyes lit up when I heard it. "You studied photography?"

"Yes, I'm a media student." She smiled, smiling very nicely, "I'm from the 05 Media Department, and my name is Jiang Anxi. You can call me Xiaoxi."

"Okay, Xiaoxi, it's a pleasure to meet the great director. I'm from the Department of Literature in 06, and my name is Lin Yiyang."

It is said that the media and the Department of Literature have a natural topic, so the two of us chatted all afternoon.The boring time has gradually become full.

From Xiaoxi's words, I know a lot about the ups and downs of the media department.I really envy their lives, which are as eye-catching, gorgeous, and wonderful as the stars in the entertainment industry; and she also said with a smile, our life is so literary and artistic, it is really like walking out of poetry.At the same time, I also learned that Xiaoxi is a T, that is, the part that plays a man in gay.And what she wants to make this time is a movie that Les prefers.

But I'm not surprised at all, such a good-looking girl, I think, even if she doesn't want to like girls, there should be many girls chasing her.

She is so elegant, handsome, and energetic, even I am attracted to her without knowing it.

Later we chatted a lot, until the boss came back, we stopped the topic which had gone to nowhere.And Xiaoxi also negotiated terms with the boss, successfully borrowed the space of the coffee shop, and promised to allow me to watch their filming, I was very excited for a long time.

The next day, filming began.Xiaoxi said that work would start early in the morning, so I specially asked for leave to come and have a look.She gave me a script and said she wanted me, an expert in the literature department, to give me some pointers.Then ordered people to dismiss the audience who needed pictures during the shooting, and began to direct actors into the play.

This is a story that ends in tragedy.The two protagonists in the story eventually end their relationship with each other due to social pressure.

I think this subject matter is very realistic and touching.If the filming is successful, it will definitely arouse people's attention and tolerance towards homosexuality.

The actors Xiaoxi chose are all good-looking, and they all look like celebrities.It's just that in my opinion, Jiang Anxi is the most handsome, and every time the filming is over, I can see the heroine showing unknown love for her, which makes me tremble and feel even more uncomfortable.

Halfway through the filming, Xiaoxi yelled "click".

Seeing her sweating profusely, I obsequiously made her a cup of latte, because she said yesterday that her favorite coffee is latte, just like I love cappuccino.

It's just that the actress looked at me with gloomy eyes, which made me a little unnatural.In fact, I really like being around Xiaoxi, the charm that radiates from her body is enough to attract everyone around her to pay attention to her.

But I'm a straight person, I don't like lesbians, and the one I love must be a man—even if my clothes are neutral.

In the next few days, I continued to ask for leave to stay with Jiang Anxi.As she goes from one scene to another, watch her review, edit, and repair the film in her notebook over and over again.I was like a little fan attracted by her, and Jiang Anxi didn't dislike me being with me everywhere, I even followed her to her residence.

Jiang Anxi's house is very big, rented outside, only one person lives in, and a lot of shooting equipment is placed in the single room.I don't know how she talked with Shen Guan, but our department does not allow non-local students to rent a room outside.

But I know that Jiang Anxi's family is definitely rich.So although she is not a student in the province, she can live outside.This is out of reach for me.

It was very late that day, everyone else left, only I stayed with Jiang Anxi for a long time in her room.

She watched and operated the video for a long time, and her serious look was very nice.

Turning around, she smiled at me who was a little sleepy, and said, "Yiyang, aren't you going back tonight?"

"Huh?" I was a little surprised, but I didn't even think about going back tonight.

But at this moment she asked so suddenly, which made me a little embarrassed. "I."

I was a little incoherent, met her eyes, my face even showed signs of fever, and I said, "I don't know."

Then she smiled and came and sat next to me and stared at me for a long time.Without warning, my eyes froze.

"These days, you have been by my side; good girl, you don't even go to class." She laughed and teased, but the light in her eyes was so soft.Then she went on to say, "And, I found that from the first day you came into contact with me, in the shots I took, you appeared more and more, and you ran in a lot..."

"This... I didn't mean it." I was really at a loss.

"Don't worry, fool." She smiled, put my shoulders, "I like your presence

.I like you. "

Then, in my astonishment, she leaned down and took my first kiss gently.

Her lips are so sweet, it makes my whole body fascinated.

Unfinished, confused, she gently moved to my ear, bit my ear and asked, "Be my woman, okay, Xiaoyang."

Without thinking, I hugged her back and agreed.

That night, I lost all my firsts.

Waking up in Jiang Anxi's arms the next day, seeing her exhausted face from a night of fighting, I smiled.

I never thought that my first night would be so easily lost; let alone that it was a woman who took her away.

But Jiang Anxi is so reliable and gives me a sense of security.So much so that I am obsessed with everything about her, without any rejection or disgust.

Lying in her arms, smelling the fragrance of her daughter on her chest, I remembered last night when she knew that it was the first time for me, she asked me so gently if it hurt; I was like a fool, I didn’t understand anything, just Shaking his head shyly, he gave everything in such a foolish way.

I thought, I love her.There is no other reason.

Then, we fell in love.The days are going well.She even took me home, met my parents, met my friends, I never thought there would be such open-minded parents.

But I was relieved when I knew she had an older brother.And Jiang Anxi also told me that she came out of the closet since she was very young, and her parents should have seen her off by that time.

Jiang Anxi's family is very big and rich.She can be regarded as the rich second generation, and she is a very promising rich second generation.

She got acquainted with many famous ladies and rich children, as well as many big names in the entertainment industry.She took me to party and have fun with them, which opened my eyes and met a lot of friends that I couldn't believe I would meet in my dreams.

Only then did I know that the legendary rich second generation is not so far away. Many of them are friendly and low-key, not as ostentatious as the outside world says.Of course, there are also annoying ones.

Jiang Anxi told me that her dream is to be a great director who can make Les movies that shock the world, so that people can accept it and face it squarely.

I laughed, what a childish woman.

Jiang Anxi's family has a large estate, and there is an open space that was built as a forest.

I vaguely remember that she took me running in the woods, and she told me that there are all the good things of her childhood here, so she will bring all the good things here to treasure—including me and us.

I love her so much, so I let her lead me around.

The sweetness dilutes my college time like this. In a blink of an eye, I went to graduate school. Jiang Anxi chose to successfully enter a well-known media company to work as an assistant to a big director through the relationship he had built up over the years. We gradually lost the chance to get tired of being together.

Later someone told me that Jiang Anxi often flirts with a new female star.I didn't mind at first, but then I got anxious.I asked Jiang Anxi what he was thinking.

She told me that she and her were just friends in college, and she also said that I knew her, the heroine she used in the film when we first met.I remembered the girl's interested eyes on her at that time, and thought that now they are in the same company, and the rumors are raging, I couldn't bear it anymore, I said, "Jiang Anxi, she likes you, you should know better than me! Now I Not by your side, I am extremely insecure, can you make me feel at ease?!"

Jiang Anxi also became angry. It was the first time she had become so angry in a long time. She said, "Lin Yiyang, please be clear about your status! Although you are my girlfriend, you have no reason to criticize my relationship. !"

One sentence broke my heart completely, and I ran out of her residence in tears, crying all the way.I think this is what people often say, true love gradually ends when it reaches the graduation period.

That night I stayed at the house of a best friend in the same circle and wept bitterly, and Jiang Anxi never called at all. My best friend asked for me, only to find out that she went to a bar for fun.I was so angry that I wanted to break up with her, but my girlfriend advised me, maybe I went to the bar because I was in a bad mood?But when I heard that the girl was among the people who went with me, I was completely angry.I texted Jiang Anxi, and I said, if she insists on not dismissing that girl, we will break up.

But Jiang Anxi didn't call me back all night, and didn't tell me until the next day that this was not her job, and she had no right or need to take care of it.

I was completely heartbroken by her, with broken emotions, I waited for her to pick me up at my girlfriend's house with the last hope in my arms, but she was so busy that she didn't even look at it.

The sweetness of the past suddenly disappeared like a dream in my eyes, and I felt that I was completely awake.

So I moved back to the dormitory from her place and decided to ignore her for a while.

Later she came to me, apologized to me, and bought a lot of roses to coax me.I believe it, the old-fashioned apology has always served me well.She also told me that the actress had already left, and all the unhappiness at that moment disappeared, and I burst into tears in her arms.At the same time, I found that she lost a lot of weight, so I almost rushed back to the residence the next day, and then frantically bought a lot of supplements for her.Seeing that I was dizzy from work, she smiled heartlessly.she says,

"Lin Yiyang, you are like an old woman."

I murmured that she was poor-mouthed, but she hugged me coquettishly and flirted on my back.

Afterwards, life was very stable, but Jiang Anxi became thinner and thinner, no matter how much he ate, he couldn't get fat.I was very worried about her health and told her to see a doctor, but she insisted that there was no problem and that she would look better if she was thinner.But I was afraid, afraid that something bad would happen.

She smiled and touched my head, she said, "Girl, don't be afraid, everything will be fine."

Until one day, she passed out at the recording site, I rushed over, and the doctor said that she was just too tired, so I was relieved.After that, I asked her to take a good rest and nourish her body.But she went from dodging to pushing me away impatiently,

tell me to get away.

I was very puzzled and wronged. I just thought she was too tired so I didn't want to care about it.

She is getting more and more irritable.

I asked her what's wrong, she said she was too tired, that night I cried behind her back all night, I knew she heard it, but she didn't coax me anymore.

So I was bearish and became less attached to her.It doesn't matter to her either.

Just half a year after that, one night, I went home for a long time.As soon as I got home, I saw the bedroom door was closed, and my intuition told me that this moment had finally come.

So I opened the door with the key, turned on the light, and saw her lying on the bed with that woman. I sneered, but couldn't hold back my tears. I picked up the desk lamp and threw it over, but in exchange for her silence.

At that moment, although I had a premonition, I couldn't stop the distress and despair, so I fell out-I knew, we were over.My god, it collapsed, and after I fell into it for a long time, there would be vague news that her love with that girl was progressing rapidly.So I sneered, I can't get up after a setback.

So I went through the formalities for going abroad as quickly as possible, and flew to the United States——I couldn’t

Look directly at this time-destroyed, truly crazy love.

Jiang Anxi didn't contact me during that time, as if I was forgotten by her, I also started

Learn to forget.

===============================================

What Lin Yiyang didn't know was that in the same year, while Lin Yiyang was trying to forget the love she believed to be full of scars, Jiang Anxi's funeral was being carried out in a low-key manner in the grove where they had shared memories.

Jiang Anxi, died of stomach cancer.

This is the fact that she has been asking to conceal Lin Yiyang.

There was no ostentation like before when she was alive, she lay quietly in the crystal coffin, and was quietly put into that empty tomb.

It is said that Jiang Anxi once asked her parents not to be cremated after death, and they were put into the soil completely, eroded and gnawed by the land, and belonged to the forest without any omission; she said, She was afraid that when she was cremated, those winds would blow away a little of her thoughts.And every minute and every second of her life was precious to her...

=================================================

I still couldn't believe it when our mutual friend Amy told me about the deaths.

This woman I loved and hated so much left me forever.even

No one told me why she died, and no one could tell me instead of her, and answer me, whether the affair I suspected was also deliberately arranged by her...

Now, I stand quietly in front of her grave.The person who once made me obsessed to hate is still smiling brightly in front of the mirror frame.

Heart palpitations.

I sighed sadly, and gently placed the bouquet of lilies among the bunch of daisies.

Just letting go of this, the past that I thought had been silent reappeared in front of my eyes again, and the pain made me squint my eyes.

"Jiang Anxi." I whispered her name again softly and obsessively, "Please come back..."

Stop hating, maybe even stop loving.I only hope that you exist as always...

The wind blew gently, blowing away the lilies all over the place.

The rain is pattering down, just like the first meeting.

That day, the world was drizzling like it used to be, and for various reasons, there was no one else in the coffee shop.When I heard the piano piece of Stefanie Sun's "Encounter", the door opened with a "crash", and the wind chimes at the door jingled, and then I saw Jiang Anxi walking in with an umbrella...

Really Want……

I really want to go back to the beginning...

It's just, never, never going back...

I will always love you and forgive you for your evil deeds.

Have a good journey, Jiang Anxi.

Please remember to look back and look at the past when you are walking on the other side of heaven.

I remember that in the world, there used to be a woman who loved you, named Lin, Yi and Yang.

The End

The author has something to say: The author's debut novel of Lily; it is also the source of inspiration for the "Boss's Home" series.

(There is one more thing I want to say: I am a Christian, from my family, so with the role of Rose and her sister, I don’t know if you understand, she actually gives a lot of love, and these are the things God made What she conveyed to her sister made Rose know that God never gave up on loving her, even if she chose to be gay. Because God loves the world, and bullying is evil. Doing things that please God is extremely honorable.

Thank you God for guiding me.Hallelujah praise the Lord. )

To dear readers and friends

Dear readers and friends:

Spread the letter good.

Thank you for choosing my works to read from tens of millions of novels, and I am so grateful that I can't bear to forget them.

Although we have never met, I regard you as my friends from the bottom of my heart.I know this sounds hypocritical, but I can't help it, who made me a black sign and a Venus lion?

Since I am Venus Leo, love and marriage exist like a kingdom to me, and my view of love is inevitably accompanied by the "blueprint" and "king" cards.

A few days ago a very popular movie, the song "Decent" in "Predecessor 3: Goodbye to the Ex", actually reproduced my attitude towards love very well - it's a pity that Venus Leo is the most Leo - not a king but Always yearn to be treated like a king.Therefore, until today, I have not been fortunate enough to encounter love that can make me love crisply, heartbroken and vigorously, and even more often, I personally encounter more bullying things than ordinary people .

I suffered from the bullying on campus until I graduated.So I have always had a more "fair and just" view of love, especially homosexuality - this also depends on my Mars Libra and Moon Scorpio, I always think that good will be rewarded with good, and evil will be rewarded with evil, although what I have so far There is no retribution for all the bullying I have endured, but I have gradually seen the tragic situation that fewer and fewer of them treat each other sincerely-is this not the theory of cause and effect?

A large part of the stories you have seen about Ash from the "Boss's House" and "Zero" series come from the real things I saw and experienced in the gay circle and some gay bars.It may be that the emotional world of Moon Scorpio is very negative, but this is the result of my personal experience - very bad.It even shook my view of love and affected my perception of sexual orientation.

Although I am not perfect, any love with bullying, family or friendship, is not acceptable to me as a person.

To be honest, I have "come out" at home, but I will regret this decision now, the biggest part of the reason is that my family gives me more love than those gays, and the gay circle, I feel Take more damage.

Maybe people in special bars in the mainland circle are more... powerful?Let me tell the truth!All in all, it's my fault that I'm not very attractive, so I get hurt more than I'm loved.Therefore, there is a character like Ash.

I mentioned in my previous article that I study art, so I am very glad that I am protected by academic requirements. I chose a path that others cannot understand, although some people will tell me that if I choose this kind of life, it is easy to be single for a lifetime , they would suggest or even threaten me not to expose some of my personal feelings too much, but I can only "hehe", because the pursuit of social development must be civilization, and the country is undergoing transformation, and I cannot retreat to bullying, barbarism and violence. And let me not be able to say what I want to say about my feelings!After all... I am good-looking~ Those of us who study art are more good-looking, because the rumors and gossips we bear are the bargaining chips for our social status.Cai Kangyong said so.

I really want to make myself a better person.

I hope people who love me can understand me - this is my blueprint for the future.I even believe that - people who love me will want me to be a better person, just as I wish you all the same.

That's what I want to tell you.

I wonder if it will disappoint some of them?

But that's how I am anyway.

I'm even a little bit better than some shitty and obsessed people.

Finally, I hope you will all be my friends!

Good night, friends - have sweet dreams.