My ex boyfriend won't let me fall in love

The fight started abruptly and ended even more abruptly.

The four miscellaneous fish were lying at their feet. Lu Xingchen took out a handkerchief from his pocket and handed it to Fang Lingfei.

"Mother Xixi." Fang Lingfei took the handkerchief, and said a personal attack in a gentle and polite voice.

One of his buttons had been pulled off, and his hairstyle couldn't be seen at all.

"Dirty." The corner of Lu Xingchen's lips curled up, and he also gave him three words in return.

Compared to the actor Fang Fang's clothes, which were stained with dust and lacked parts, none of the corners of his clothes were messed up. Even if he just entered the hall and picked up a glass of champagne, he felt that no one would be able to detect that something was wrong.

Fang Lingfei knew before that Lu Xingchen was good at fighting, but the strange thing was that after four years of not fighting, not only did his skills not decline, but he became even stronger.

——He didn't find himself judging that the other party hadn't fought for a long time like instinct.

Fang Lingfei felt a little depressed: [I even found someone to learn it for filming scenes! 】

No. 1 is not distracted to comfort: [The supporter should be careful, you are already better than many people. 】

Fang Lingfei: [For example? 】

No. 1: [For example, the group in the hall, one-on-one, you can beat everyone! 】

【You better shut up! 】Is he proud of being better than a group of people who are either forty or fifty, or who are pampered and hollowed out by wine and sex?

When he was about to leave, Lu Xingchen bent down and carefully looked at the faces of the four people who were still lying on the ground.

Fang Lingfei was waiting for him, with a irritating sarcasm on the corner of his lips, "Why, afraid of being retaliated?"

"No." Lu Xingchen simply walked out of the area of ​​Gu's villa with him, and took a walk on the road in the villa area.

"I'm not afraid of retaliation," he said, "but I'm planning to preemptively and get revenge on others."

The light on the side of the road was slightly yellow, and Fang Lingfei couldn't see Lu Xingshen's specific expression clearly, but he didn't need to see clearly, the past experience had already made him subconsciously imagine what expression should be on his face.

It must be the pride and cunning that can't be concealed, but it's reasonable and righteous.

Thinking about it this way, Actor Fang usually adds a supplement at the end.

——Of course, it's also a very annoying look.

After the addition, he felt that his anger was much smoother.

Lu Xingshen said that he wanted to take revenge, so he didn't want to continue, and he didn't plan to communicate.

The profound impact of habit made Fang Lingfei almost subconsciously start thinking about what he might do. This is the instinct left by worrying about someone Lu back then.

But he pulled away quickly.

It's been four years, and I still think about these useless things, and I'm full, he said to himself.

Different from the music at the banquet and the exchange of wine and wine, the road in the villa area is very quiet. As one of the two protagonists in the name of this birthday party, Fang Lingfei found that Lu Xingcen had been wandering outside with him for so long, and no one came to look for him. .

He remembered that in the three months before the breakup, there were rumors in the school that Lu Xingchen had found his biological parents, and then they broke up suddenly, until graduation, together with Fang Lingfei, no one saw him again.

Some people said that it was because he became the heir of a wealthy family and disdain to hang out with ordinary classmates. Fang Lingfei scoffed at this, but when they broke up, Lu Xingchen did not give an explanation. Now, four years later, it seems impossible to explain. A lot of excess.

After the breakup, any extra attention would be self-defeating, he told himself.

Putting one hand in his pants pocket, Fang Lingfei tilted his head slightly. Lu Xingshen beside him regained his composure after the fight. There was a lonely distance under the moonlight, and the words of those people broke into his mind unexpectedly. "The phoenix flying on the branch", "the sparrow", "not registered in the Gu family's household registration book", "moved out of the Gu family to live alone", the sentences formed by these words can't go away.

He suddenly said: "I just helped, do you recognize it?"

Lu Xing paused: "Yes."

"That's good." Fang Lingfei turned to look at him, "I don't need any favors from you, but I don't like to work for nothing."

"So what do you mean?"

"You answer me a question."

Lu Xingchen suddenly had a premonition about what he said, he should let the conversation stop here, some things are best buried directly.But maybe he was bewitched by the moonlight and lights, or maybe the fight just now aroused something suppressed in his bones, he said, "What do you want to ask?"

Fang Lingfei looked into his eyes: "When we broke up back then, the reason you told me was that you were not naturally suitable for connecting with people. I don't believe it. This problem has troubled me for four years. Tonight, I want a real s answer."

……

Four years ago in November, late autumn night.

Fang Lingfei returned to the dormitory exhausted. His body was thin and his face was pale and haggard. He covered his face with his hands, and the fatigue rising from the depths of his soul turned into a tidal wave that almost drowned him.

The other two residents in this four-person bedroom moved out shortly after school started, leaving only two people living there.When Lu Xingshen was there, it was a warm and private space for two people, but once that person was gone, surrounded by snow-white walls, the room immediately showed a permeating emptiness and silence.

Graduation is approaching, and everyone is either preparing for graduation thesis defense, or planning what job to look for, whether to return to their hometown or stay in a big city.

Fang Lingfei and Lu Xingshen were originally one of them.

They had already planned it when they were juniors. After graduation, they would pick up jobs first. Fang Lingfei learned interior design, and Lu Xingshen learned programming. They didn't have to go to the company to work.Once he has a fixed source of customers, he can earn money for half a year, travel for half a year, and open a wood carving shop when he doesn't want to travel or gets old.

However, the plans were disrupted a few months ago.

——Because Lu Xingshen disappeared.

Fang Lingfei participated in closed training for the competition in those few days, and by the time he received the news, several days had passed.

Lu Xingchen couldn't be contacted. He found many classmates. Some people said that Lu Xingchen beat someone to death and was arrested by the police. Others said that he was not killed, but it was serious. He was expelled from school. After finding him, he went to study abroad.

There were many rumors, but none of them could help Fang Lingfei find someone.

Today is his No.40 five times to the police station to inquire, but still nothing.

Fang Lingfei thought that he was strong enough to calmly fight back against his uncle's harshness and mother's ignorance, but it wasn't until Lu Xingchen disappeared that he realized that he was still so vulnerable that he couldn't even find the whereabouts of his boyfriend.

In the past few months, he has been too tired.

When awakened by the thunderstorm, Fang Lingfei found himself sitting on a chair and fell asleep.

The wind blew the window to the frame, heavy rain came in through the window, and Lu Xingchen's bed by the window was mostly wet.

Fang Lingfei wiped his face and got up to close the window.

Then he found a person standing under the rain-beaten osmanthus tree downstairs in the dormitory.

Thin and tiny, like a misty shadow.

But Fang Lingfei recognized at a glance that it was Lu Xingchen.

He rushed out and brought the man back.

It was raining heavily, and the weather in late autumn was cold to the bone, but Lu Xingchen's body was very hot, so hot that people were afraid.

Fang Lingfei wanted to ask where you were these past few months, and also wanted to ask if it was true that they said you beat someone?

However, the moment he met Lu Xingshen's eyes, he didn't want to ask anything anymore, he said, "Do you want a hug?"

Lu Xingchen embedded himself into his arms.

"You are sick, shall we take some cold medicine?"

The light was from top to bottom, and Lu Xingshen's long eyelashes cast two shadows. Fang Lingfei couldn't see his expression, but heard his hoarse voice, like the wind rustling through the forest, repeating his words: "I'm sick. .”

Hugging him tightly, Fang Lingfei tried his best to convey his heartbeat to him, with a gentleness like coaxing a child that he didn't know, "If you are sick, you need to take medicine, and you will be fine after taking the medicine."

"Yes, you'll be fine after taking the medicine." Lu Xingshen closed his eyes and said.

When he opened it again, he had returned to normal, and became the proud and handsome Lu Xingchen who was able to face everything with ease.

Fang Lingfei touched his forehead carefully, but fortunately, it wasn't hot.

There are always medicines for traumatic injuries and blood stasis in the dormitory, but there are not many cold medicines, and the pills have expired. He opened two packs of granules and made a cup of liquid with a strange taste.

Lu Xingshen has a sensitive sense of taste, so the pills have to be mixed with other things, let alone granules.Fang Lingfei touched the drawer where the toffee was stored, only to find that the storage had long been exhausted.

"You drink first, let's go buy toffee tomorrow, and just buy the brand that you think is delicious?" He was ready to bargain, but Lu Xingchen didn't give him any room to play, so he took the toffee, Quiet finished drinking.

When Lu Xingshen went in to take a bath, Fang Lingfei's thoughts were confused. He felt that something was wrong. From his disappearance, to the strangeness when he came back today, to not being picky at all and obediently taking medicine, everything was wrong.

However, Lu Xing calmly suppressed the storm and undercurrent, and his eyes showed tiny hope and desperate determination, so he couldn't ask.

They huddled together on a single bed, hand to hand, shoulder to shoulder, and the temperature was infected with each other.

For more than three months, he was mentally tense, and in his sleep, he was looking for someone in the vast crowd. As soon as he touched the pillow, his deep fatigue turned into a whirlpool, and he couldn't wait to swallow Fang Lingfei.

"Go to sleep."

In a daze, he heard these two words, and the string that he refused to relax finally relaxed, and he fell into a deep sleep.

Fang Lingfei thought that everything would be back on track.

When he opened his eyes, the torrential rain had stopped and the morning glow had not yet dissipated.The poor-quality curtains in the dormitory are not capable of shading enough, and the room is in a semi-dark and semi-bright obscurity.

Lu Xingshen sat on the stool by the window, watching him.There is a window behind him, and the light has coated his outline with a layer of light, but the face that is not illuminated by the light seems to have been blurred in darkness.

Fang Lingfei could feel that Lu Xingchen looked at him deeply.

Anxiety rose up in my heart like fog, "What's wrong?"

Lu Xingshen didn't speak, stood up and opened half of the curtains, the sunlight poured in completely, and fell into his eyes, where there was a piece of solid ice forming.

Fang Lingfei heard the man half body bathed in the sun say, "Let's break up."

Silence pervades.

A long time later, thinking back on this day, Fang Lingfei felt strange about his own reaction. He didn't pester him endlessly, he didn't struggle madly, and he didn't even lose his composure.

Calmly sanely scary.

Perhaps it was because during those three months of hopeless searching, some premonitions had already been produced.

"Why?" He asked Lu Xingshen.

Lu Xingchen seemed to be smiling, but Fang Lingfei couldn't see the smile with the backlight, only heard a sentence.

"Maybe it's because I'm not a natural fit to connect with people."

Fang Lingfei watched Lu Xingchen go away from the bedside. There was something in his body that was taken out by the embarrassment and reinjected, called hatred.

and after?Later he heard that Lu Xingshen had indeed found his biological parents. His parents were noble and well-known businessmen in the upper class of the city. He was their only child.

The teacher who had agreed to introduce him to the job called, but Fang Lingfei refused in a low voice.

"Sorry to trouble you. I plan to do something else... It has nothing to do with majors. I don't know if I can do it well. I want to try." He said.

Putting down the phone, Fang Lingfei found the business card that someone had stuffed for him half a year ago, which he casually threw in the drawer, and knocked on the door of the entertainment company.

……

The moon was dim and the stars were twinkling. Fang Lingfei looked into Lu Xingshen's eyes and said, "I remember that you don't like to owe others, and I don't want you to owe me either. I just want an answer."