Baima Weiyang

Lobsang Yeshe's expression changed when he heard the sound, and he looked at Tsangyang Gyatso with heartache.Cangyang Gyatso did not avoid his eyes, but there was inevitably a trace of guilt in the dark eyes.I clenched my fist secretly until my joints turned white and I didn't feel any pain.

He suddenly withdrew his gaze, clasped his hands solemnly, and muttered, "Everything is impermanent, everything is suffering, all dharmas have no self, and extinction is joy. Om Mani Padme Hum."

The thick and low sound of the Buddha's horn came to my ears, and my heart seemed to be slipped by sharp paper, and the pain was dull but clear.Numbly waiting for the pain to pass away, I took a light breath, and a mist suddenly appeared in my eyes.

I used to think that I could face all this calmly.Even if it's not because of how strong I am, I come from modern times after all, so it's easier to accept things that violate ethics and morals.But now I have really met, especially after the fifth class and Zen never looked at me from the beginning to the end, I realized how much I have to bear for what I did...

The wooden sculpture stood there like a clay sculpture, and my legs seemed to have turned into heavy lead blocks, but even so, they seemed unable to support my weight.I staggered back, but my hand was suddenly gently held. I was startled, and a warm feeling slowly spread into my body, which was faint but with an irresistible force.

Turning my head to look at Tsangyang Gyatso, my eye sockets became hot, and my breathing gradually eased up again.

"Hmph..." There was a chuckle suddenly, and Lazang, with his hands behind his back, walked down the stairs slowly.He glanced at me playfully, and said mockingly, "Master is really kind-hearted, and I don't want your disciples to make mistakes."

Cangyang Gyatso turned his eyes and looked at Lhazang who was a few steps away, the corners of his mouth were tightly closed.Although Luosang Yeshe's gaze was not in our direction, he could still see it clearly from the corner of his eye.He closed his eyes with a little disappointment, his eyes were full of pain, and was about to turn around and leave when Lhazang suddenly stopped him from behind, "Master Pan and Chan, please stay."

As soon as my heart tightened, Lhazang turned his head as if aware of it, and smiled at me triumphantly.I gave him a mocking look across the corner of my eye, and he immediately raised his eyebrows excitedly.My face darkened, and I immediately looked away. Damn, being looked at like this, it seems that he really took advantage of me.

From the corner of the eye, he caught a glimpse of him stopping his smile, turned his head indifferently, and bowed to Luosang Yeshe with his palms folded, "Master Pan-Chan, Lhazang has been entangled in many trivial matters recently, and his heart has become knotted due to carelessness..." He After a pause, the wind glanced at me again.Seeing that I didn't respond, I lowered my body in a rare way, "I hope Pan and Master Zen will give you advice."

"Meng Taiji will not give up, you can study it, but you can't teach it." Luosang Yixi returned the gift indifferently.Lhazang turned sideways and made a gesture of invitation, "Master, you are welcome. This way please."

Luosang Yeshe nodded and walked towards the direction of Lhazang's finger.Lhazang smiled and gave Cangyang Gyatso and me a sideways look, then put his hands behind his back with a relaxed expression, and walked away.

I stared blankly at his leaving back, and my eyelids were sore for a moment.I stood there for a while, when suddenly a tall figure stood in front of me.Looking up, he just met Shangcangyang Gyatso's Qingjun eyes, and his shoulders were gently embraced, "Did you fall just now?"

I glanced at him, then shook and lowered my head.Cangyang Gyatso reached out and raised my chin, with a trace of hesitation in his eyes, "Really?"

"En..." I nodded, just about to say something, but Tsangyang Gyatso grabbed my arm and carefully checked the wound on my wrist.Although it's not completely healed yet, when I fell down the stairs just now, it didn't pull very hard, so now it's just a little bit of pain.

"It's really all right." I smiled and opened his hand, and moved it lightly, "Here, look." Just as I looked at him with some complacency, there was a "click" on my wrist.I was taken aback, I didn't understand what was going on, I just felt a flash of pain.After thinking about it for a long time, Cangyang Gyatso glanced at me reproachfully, and then explained, "It's the joints."

"Oh." I nodded in response to his words.When Cangyang Gyatso saw the sudden realization on my face, he couldn't help frowning and pushed my head down, but a smile slowly formed on his mouth.Seeing him like this, I also became happy, and it seemed that the haze just now disappeared.

In fact, it is very clear that Tsangyang Gyatso's intentional departure just now was a temptation to Lhazang.It's just that the sudden appearance of the Fifth Panchen Lama...was it Lhazang's intention, or was Tsangyang Gyatso's scheme?Or, does this also mean that the news has reached Diba's ears?

Looking up at Cangyang Gyatso, he suddenly felt that his face was a little blurry.He was looking at me steadfastly, his dark eyes seemed to have seen my thoughts.But after all, it is very close to the stairs, and there are many monks and believers coming and going.Although there are acolytes guarding it, most people can't rely on it, but it's not a place to talk.Seeing him comforting me with his eyes, I tried my best to twitch the corners of my mouth, and my mood relaxed a lot.

Suddenly, there was a drumbeat in the square courtyard.It was light at first, and slowly turned into a rich and dull sound. At the end, the cymbal sound came in again.It seems that he should start acting Tibetan opera.Seeing that I couldn't hold back my curiosity, Tsangyang Gyatso led me into the courtyard.

On the square stage, Tibetan opera characters wear exaggerated masks and brightly colored robes. Their singing and dancing steps are quite different from the operas I have seen before.I asked Tsangyang Gyatso who was beside me and found out that it was "Princess Wencheng".

The sound of drums and cymbals is mixed, and although the sound is loud, it does not make people feel obtrusive.If it were me in the past, I would definitely be disgusted with the sometimes low and sometimes babbling repertoire in front of me.But after being here for so long, everything has changed.You really have to be in it to experience the strong Tibetan atmosphere.

In fact, authentic Tibetan opera has no stage.Now it is also for the convenience of watching that the stage is specially set up.The people in the audience were all Tibetans, wearing various robes, and some even held khatas.Probably there were too many people, so even if I stood beside Cangyang Gyatso, almost no one would notice.

This made me breathe a sigh of relief secretly, and I felt better about enjoying Tibetan opera.It's just that Lhazang's sudden attacks hurt me all over. Now Tsangyang Gyatso is controlling me tightly, and I can't leave my body even a step.But of course it wasn't him who followed me every step of the way, but me, every step I took I had to look up to see his expression.

During the interval between the performances, the music from the stage stopped leisurely, and there was no sound in the square courtyard.Suddenly there was a whisper in my ear, and I turned my head strangely, only to see Danba whispering something in Tsangyang Gyatso's ear.Curiously, I leaned forward to listen, but Tsangyang Gyatso pushed my head back. I looked up at him reproachfully, but Tsangyang Gyatso stared at me coldly.

I curled my lips and turned my head back unwillingly.My gaze fell on the stage pretendingly, I secretly pricked up my ears, and listened intently to the movement in my ears.It's not very clear, only vague words similar to Ban and Master Zen.

I was racking my brains to piece together the broken information, when suddenly a warm hand fell on my shoulder, I was startled, and looked at Tsangyang Gyatso with lingering fear.He glanced at me lightly, and said in a low voice, "I have something to deal with, you go back to Gadan Nang Sai first. Stay well and don't wander around."

While thinking about the affairs of the fifth world, I nodded with a dazed expression.Cangyang Gyatso paused, his eyebrows frowned slightly, and he tilted his head and said, "Danba, watch her carefully."

"Ah?" I snapped back to my senses, just as I was about to ask clearly, I saw Cangyang Gyatso suddenly turn around. "Yes." Danba made a Namaste salute, then took a step in my direction, and said respectfully, "This way please."

I looked at Tsangyang Gyatso's back, and although my heart was a little heavy, I still had no choice but to walk towards the stairs.The Gadan Nang Saili is still paved with gold and silver, and is full of jewels, but now I don't have the slightest mood to appreciate the splendor and wealth.Walked back and forth in the room a few times, guessing all kinds of results, and finally frightened myself into a cold sweat.

I was originally an optimist, but only in this matter, once I think about it, I can't be optimistic.Probably people's psychological burden is far heavier than I imagined, and they can even be tortured day and night.

No one can wait in peace while knowing the ending.Just like the fish on the chopping board, even with its last breath left, it still has to struggle.What's more, how many of these details cannot be read in history books?

Thinking dizzily for a while, he turned his head and looked outside the door. Under the corner of the curtain lifted by the wind, Danba in cassock was standing meticulously, with a serious expression.

"Alas—" I sighed. With Danba's loyalty, he would never let me go out and wander around unless Tsangyang Gyatso ordered him to do so.But after thinking about it, even if he went out, he couldn't do anything, so he might as well stay here to save Lazang from trouble.

Anyway, the process is always unpredictable, so I can only take one step at a time. Even if I want to break my head, I can't figure it out. "Huh..." He let out a long breath, and finally felt a little more comfortable in his chest.I walked to the bed, adjusted the soft quilt, and lay on my back.

But just after squinting for a while, a light cough suddenly came from outside the curtain, the voice sounded a bit deliberate.I was taken aback, and sat up immediately, "Danba?" I called out tentatively, and the person outside the curtain replied, "It's me. Are you... asleep?"

Hearing his trembling voice, I quickly got up and straightened my robe, walked a few steps, opened the door curtain and opened my head.Danba was standing facing me, and when he saw me coming out suddenly, he couldn't help being startled, and hurriedly clasped his hands together to calm himself down.

Feeling something was wrong, I slowly turned my eyes to the side, and what caught my eyes was a lama I had never seen before, wearing a wide cassock, with regular features and a solemn expression.He saluted them slowly, and when he raised his head, he heard Danba's voice hesitatingly saying, "Master Pan-Chan... sent someone to invite you over."

I twitched the corner of my mouth, feeling a bitter taste in my mouth.I knew that I couldn't escape this test, but I didn't expect it to come so soon... Naturally, an eminent monk like the Fifth Master would not use any means against me, but it is because of this that it is even more unbearable Bar.

Looking at the situation, there is no way to notify Cangyang Gyatso.I took a breath, looked back at Gadan Nang Sai, and said slowly, "Let's go, don't keep Ban and Master Chan waiting."

As soon as the words were finished, the lama standing aside suddenly frowned and looked up at me with a hint of puzzlement in his eyes.I quickly lowered my head, but my heart felt bad for a while.Subconsciously not wanting to speak again, I turned my head away in silence.

As the lama walked into the corridor, Danba also followed, but when he walked out of Ganden Phodrang, he turned to another road without hesitation.The intention couldn't be more obvious, the lama looked at Danba's back as usual, but didn't say anything.

After being led to stop in front of a secluded Rajang, he stood respectfully by the door and gestured for me to open the curtain and enter.After adjusting my mood a little, I walked in with big strides.

Rajangli is a little dark, and the narrow south window is the only source of light.His eyes swept across the whole room, and finally stopped at the Zen bed in the east.Lobsang Yeshe with a solemn expression was sitting in lotus position, when he heard footsteps, he couldn't help but slowly opened his eyelids.

Trembling for no reason, I hurriedly lowered my head and saluted him with clasped hands.I made up my mind to delay the action in my hand again and again, but when I came back to my senses, I realized that I had already finished it quickly.

Lobsang Yeshe got off the Zen bed and stopped in front of my eyes.He looked down at me, with a hint of love in his dark eyes.I was stunned for a moment, kneeled down unconsciously on my legs, and there was a "boom", a hard pain on my knees, and I kowtowed respectfully, but the fear in my heart still didn't dissipate.

"Get up." Luosang Yeshe raised his head, motioning for me to stand up.I slowly straightened up, held my hands solemnly, and stood aside somewhat cautiously.There was not a single sound in the room, and it seemed that even the wind blowing through the windows had quietly stopped.After being silent for a while, a clear voice suddenly sounded beside my ear, "Do you know what I'm looking for you for?"

I was startled, and nodded my head lightly, "Master Ban and Zen are trying to persuade me to leave Tsangyang Gyatso, right?"

Luosang Yixi smiled slightly, with an unclear expression on his face, "No, I won't give you any resistance." I was taken aback, and looked at him in astonishment.As if he had guessed my reaction a long time ago, Luosang Yeshe twirled the beeswax rosary in his hand, and the kindness of the saint appeared on his face again, "I called you here because I want you to listen to a story."

I paused, looking at him but speechless.Lobsang Yeshe turned his head and looked out of the window, "Ananda, the second patriarch of the West, once lived with the Buddha in the Zhiyuan Vihara in Savatthi City to teach and educate all living beings. Once, the venerable held Bo went to the village outside the city of Savatthi for alms. When he came back, he suddenly felt thirsty, so he begged for water from a girl of the Sudra caste by the well. The Venerable Ananda was dignified and handsome, and even Manjushri Bodhisattva once Praise him with the phrase 'The appearance is like the full moon in autumn, and the eyes are like pure lotus flowers'."

Speaking of this, Luosang Yeshe suddenly turned his head and looked at me with a faint smile on his lips.Tsangyang Gyatso's handsome cheeks suddenly flashed in my mind, and I blushed instantly with shame.At a loss, Luosang Yeshe turned his eyes away, and Luosang Yeshe's solemn voice sounded again, "In addition, he was born in the royal family, and he spoke softly, and he did not refuse the girl's offering because of her low caste, so she fell in love with the venerable at first sight. After the venerable left Later, she couldn't bear the longing, so she cast a spell to make the venerable lose his true nature, so as to fulfill her wish. Finally, with the blessing of Buddha's power, the venerable was able to escape."

"Even so, she still couldn't let go of the obsession in her heart and entangled the venerable in every possible way. In desperation, the venerable could only turn to the Buddha. The Buddha was merciful and asked her if she would follow Ananda to become a monk, and the girl readily agreed. As time passed, Under the enlightenment of the Buddha, she finally saw through the love and desire in the world, attained Arhatship, and vowed to spread the Buddhadharma and save all living beings. This girl's name is the famous Matanga girl."

Luosang Yixi's voice stopped quietly, there was no wind coming in through the narrow window, and there was a faint sense of depression floating in the air.After thinking for a while, I suddenly raised my head, "Master Pan-Chan." I bowed with my palms together, and I restrained the trembling in my voice, "I've heard this story before."

Seeing that his expression remained unchanged, I couldn't help taking a deep breath, "In my opinion, the reason why Matanga can easily attain Buddhahood is because she has never received the love between a man and a woman from Venerable Ananda, and has not really experienced it. Once in love, it is naturally easier to give up love."

Lobsang Yeshe recited another Buddha's name with a solemn expression, "The five desires are the law of impurity and the source of all suffering. The love between men and women in the world is small love, which is not as great as the great love that a practitioner has for all living beings."

"But..." I unconsciously raised my voice, "If I hadn't experienced the love between a man and a woman, how could a Matanga girl be enlightened? How can she be detached if she doesn't fall into the world of mortals? What's more, not all love between men and women in the world It's selfish, and there are also..." When I said this, a sob suddenly choked up in my throat, and I paused, and tears flowed down without warning.

Luosang Yeshe looked at me with a kind smile on his face, "It seems that you have already realized something."

"No!" I shook my head violently, and my legs moved back unconsciously, "No! I can't do it, I...I can't do it..."

Lobsang Yeshe sighed softly, and muttered deep in his mouth, "All living beings who want to escape life and death and avoid the cycle of reincarnation must first cut off greed and love and thirst."

My head was sore and I squatted down with my arms folded. Tears wiped the skirt of my clothes and slid to the slate floor, leaving a series of imprints of different shades.Trembling and taking a breath, a "squeak" suddenly came from beside my ear.

I froze for a moment, turned my head to look, and saw that the wooden door was hastily pushed open.The corner of the crimson clothes flashed, and his eyes slowly moved up along the cassock, and what came into view was Tsangyang Gyatso's handsome cheeks.He was panting slightly, seeing me squatting there with a panicked face, he walked over in a few hurried steps.

The trembling arm was gently held by the warm palm, and he gently helped me up.I twitched the corners of my stiff mouth and forced a smile at him.Tsangyang Gyatso let go of me, clasped his hands together and saluted Lobsang Yeshe, "It should be..."

There was a hint of begging in the soft voice.Luosang Yixi paused, and regret appeared on his face again. After a while, he sighed slightly, "Forget it, you can take her back."

"Thank you Gela." Cangyang Gyatso bowed his head and saluted again, and I joined hands together.Luosang Yeshe nodded and bowed his head in return.Cangyang Gyatso reached out to hold me, turned around and pulled me to the door.When I stepped over the threshold, a loud and deep voice suddenly came from behind, "All love will be due to fate. There will be parting, and impermanence is rare for a long time."

The steps under my feet stopped, and Tsangyang Gyatso, who was pinching my wrist, was also forced to stop.He reached out and stroked my palm, and a warmth came slowly but firmly.There was inexplicable heat in my eyes, I straightened my back, and grabbed the corner of his cassock with my backhand.

After being led for a while, Cangyang Gyatso quickly sat down on the sandalwood armchair as soon as he entered the Gadan Nang Sai. He held my hand and gently tugged, and I immediately fell onto his lap.Subconsciously stabilized my body, a warm palm caressed my cheek without warning.Some rough fingertips gently rubbed my eyelids back and forth, and a soft voice sounded next to my ear, "The eye circles are so red, are you wronged?"

I paused, and a wave of heat gushed out of my eyes uncontrollably.I stretched out my hand to hold Cangyang Gyatso's hand on my cheek, that handsome face was already blurred in the water.Blinking his eyelids, heavy tears fell down on the skirt of his clothes.

"No, no..." I shook my head indiscriminately, lowering my eyes to avoid his sight, "Master Ban and Zen are eminent monks who have attained the Tao, so how could they embarrass me... It's my fault, he told me I read the story of the Matanga girl, but, I...I can't..."

The person in front of me was stunned, and his broad hands held my face completely.The lower jaw was lifted slightly, and I passively met those dark eyes.Cangyang Gyatso lowered his head and kissed my cheek, and gently wiped my tears with some dry lips, "If you can't do it, don't do it, it's okay, I won't ask you so, and it's not my original intention ,Um?"

There was a dull pain in my throat, and I took a breath tremblingly, "But... I don't want you to work so hard, I don't want to..." Cangyang Gyatso rubbed my forehead, stretched out his hand to hug me, and gently stroked my chin top of my head.

Seeing that he was silent, I couldn't help clutching his cassock in fear.Sensing my movement, Tsangyang Gyatso lowered his head and kissed my cheek again.The dry and hot thin lips wandered disorderly on my face, bringing bursts of itching.My heart suddenly felt as if I was in a sauna, and I reached out to cover his thin lips anxiously, but he pulled them off.

Cangyang Gyatso looked at me fixedly, his clear eyes shining brightly.After such a long time, a series of dense kisses landed on my forehead, followed by the corners of my eyes and behind my ears.Shallow tossing and pulling, every stroke seems to be intoxicatingly soft and lingering.My heart seems to be a piece of driftwood, floating peacefully in the sweet sea.

"Dolma..." Suddenly the earlobe was gently bitten, and the low voice echoed like a rhythmic stone, "I have lost the Tathagata, so I can't lose you again."