i go to utopia

After the dormitory lights were turned off at night, I had another dream. In the dream, I was floating on the water like a leaf with the waves.

I wandered with the waves, and when my torso was completely soaked in the water and began to sink slowly to the bottom, I woke up from the dream.

After the lights were turned off in the dormitory, the outlines of the beds seemed very blurry at night. Lin Yubei slept on the bed on my side, his breathing was a bit heavy, and the sound of him and Yan Zixi breathing one after another could be heard in the narrow dormitory. I blinked in the dark.

I felt that I was still carrying the sticky moisture from the dream, and my torso seemed to be softened. I closed my eyes and stretched my hand into my pajama pants and into my underwear.

It was still very quiet, very quiet all the time.

I got bored and pulled my hands out of my pants, and then I started to feel nauseous, and this nauseous feeling came over me, drowning me like water in my dreams, making me fall, and keep falling, let me My nausea makes me want to throw up.

I crawled out of bed and walked to the dormitory bathroom. The bathroom is equipped with warm yellow lights. I squatted on the squatting toilet in the dormitory and began to cough as if choking on water. The urge to spit out the six internal organs from his own mouth.

A few minutes later, Yan Zixi, who was near the toilet, asked in a sleepy voice: "Who, what's wrong?"

I stood up from the ground, took out a few pieces of paper and wiped my mouth. I leaned against the yellowed tiles of the toilet and replied, "It's okay, I might eat too much at night, you can go to sleep."

He answered vaguely twice, and I stood in the quiet bathroom after flushing the water and heard him and Lin Yubei breathing again and again.

At 32:[-] in the morning, I lay back on my bed, opened WeChat on my phone, clicked on the four-second voice message that Li Cuo had sent me, and put the phone on my ear.

"Whether you win or not, I'll treat you to dinner tomorrow, okay?"

His voice sounded very abruptly in such a quiet night, and it seemed very loud uncontrollably. I reached out and covered the receiver of the mobile phone, and the sound of breathing in the bedroom and the sound of the air conditioner cooling were clearly transmitted to my ears. .

I got under the quilt and clicked on this voice again.

His voice echoed in my quilt.

When I first met him, he refused to give me his WeChat, which caused me to send many text messages and MMS. Who still sends text messages now? Li Cu wasted a lot of my money.

I tapped the voice.

"Is that all right?"

All right, I thought, I feel better.I turned off the phone screen and started to go back to sleep.

·

The next day I went to a milk tea shop to work part-time. During the holidays, there were many people in the milk tea shop, and there were also many people ordering takeaway. In addition to the school sister Lan Yue, there was also a sophomore student from a nearby art school in the shop. I didn’t know him very well. , I met for the first time today, and I didn't say a few words because I had a lot of orders.

At three o'clock in the afternoon, there was a sudden heavy rain. In the milk tea shop, senior sister Lan Yue sat cross-legged in the shop and peeled pistachios to eat. Individuals stayed.

Because it was raining and no one came to the door, I and the part-time students in another store had nothing to do. Lan Yue was very annoying and couldn't take time off. A dog within a radius of [-] miles could become her friend if she wanted to. She After peeling a plate of pistachios, I clapped my hands and began to yell, saying that I can't leave anyway if I'm bored, why not play truth or dare together.

Most of the people sitting in the store were regular customers that Lan Yue knew, and they were easily summoned by her.

She pressed me to sit in the crowd, and threw a deck of cards on the table. I am not very interested. Now I just hope that this inexplicable rainstorm will stop soon. I will end today's part-time job at five o'clock Work, then go back to the dormitory to pack up things and wait for Li Cu to come to me for dinner. Tomorrow is the evening shift, so I just need to come back to school before five o'clock tomorrow.

After I was pressed on the seat by Lan Yue, I seriously refused: "I don't play."

Lan Yue began to show her true nature: "No, anyone who doesn't want to play is fine, but you can't, otherwise your salary will be deducted."

I couldn't help but rolled my eyes at her: "Shameless."

I didn't know she was waiting for me until I got the card Lan Yue eagerly asked me "Truth or Dare".

I said, "Speak the truth."

Lan Yue put down the card and asked me: "Yesterday, that was your brother, too many, are you married?"

I told her, "There are three questions here, which one should I answer?"

Lan Yue clicked her tongue: "Why are you so stubborn, kid!"

I said: "Boring." I hope the rain will stop quickly.

Lan Yue continued to gear up: "Okay, sister, let me change the question." She thought for a while, then turned her head to look at the people sitting around playing games together, and a senior who often came to drink milk tea laughed. Shouted: "Ask Brother Qiushui if he accepts sibling love?"

Lan Yue looked at me: "Accept age, is your partner much older than you?"

I nodded: "Accept."

The people around started booing, and the senior who asked the question, whose name I don't remember, laughed: "Qiu Shui, you are too easy to tease."

I said, "boring."

Lan Yue squeezed beside me and laughed: "Nonsense, our Qiushui is a little cool guy."

Their game continued again, and I glanced at the rain outside, and it always seemed a little smaller after a few more glances.

They started to play the big adventure more and more fiercely, what about confessing to the person sitting here, kissing the person next to you, I have never drawn the kid card, so their increasingly excited game has nothing to do with me.

When I was sitting at 03:30, when I glanced at the rain outside, I suddenly saw a silver-white car parked on the small road in front of the store. I stood up from my seat, and after the cards were dealt, Lan Yue quickly reached out and opened the car. Touched the playing cards in front of me: "Qiu Shui is you again, truth or adventure?"

I said, "Wait."

Lan Yue and the others played to the fullest: "Don't try to hide!"

I got out of my seat: "I'll tell you the truth, is there an umbrella in the store?" I pointed outside, "It seems to be my brother's car."

·

I asked for an umbrella from Lan Yue, and they ordered me to come back immediately and answer the truth, otherwise they would exchange it for a big adventure.

I ignored them and walked out of the shop with Lan Yue holding a transparent umbrella.

After walking to the side of the car and stopping, he could barely see Li Cuo sitting in the driver's seat and answering the phone through the black window. He glanced at me and gestured to his co-pilot position in the car.

I shook my head.

He opened the car door and got out, still holding the phone in his hand, he said slowly: "Okay, can I not go if you ask me for dinner?"

I reached out and raised the umbrella in my hand, Li Cuo reached out after closing the door, took the umbrella and put it on top of our heads, still smiling: "How can it be, isn't it because you are a busy person."

I walked in the direction of Li Cuwang's milk tea shop, and Li Cuo continued to make calls with an umbrella in his voice: "Well, I'll help you look at the materials."

"..."

"Yeah, okay, let's talk later when we meet."

After hanging up the phone, he glanced at me: "I happened to have something to do at a nearby school, and I wanted to promise you yesterday that I would treat you to dinner tonight."

I groaned and asked him, "Did you win money playing mahjong?"

Li Cu raised his eyebrows, and he asked me with a smile: "If we don't win, shall we skip this meal tonight?"

"No." I replied.

He smirked twice, and asked me when I got off work today. I pushed open the door of the milk tea shop, and Lan Yue's voice came first: "Brother, you're here, shall we play truth or dare? Anyway, it's raining." fine."

Li Cu was stunned for a moment, and he smiled: "I don't want to play with you kids." After he finished speaking, he stretched out his hand and gently pushed me, "Go to Qiushui, don't bully my brother."

I followed his strength and took a step forward, Lan Yue said eagerly, "It's impossible not to bully your brother, Qiushui said the truth, let's think about it."

I said, no matter what they ask, I don't have to tell the truth, anyway, they don't know if I'm telling the truth or a lie.

Lan Yue chuckled: "We discussed it just now, and I want to ask you..." She could still pause.

I glanced back at Li Cu, he was looking in Lan Yue's direction with an expression of willingness to hear more about it.

Lan Yue asked: "When did you get rid of your virginity?"

·

I couldn't have had a puff of heat rushing to my head.

If Li Cu was not here, I would never have started to feel hot under the [-]-degree air conditioner. I felt that my face was very hot, and my forehead was sweating a little, as if suddenly there was a burst of hot air from the soles of my feet to the top of the sky. , I was stunned by the heat.

The group headed by Lan Yue started to roar with laughter after being quiet for a second.

"Why are you blushing, brother Qiushui!"

I still heard Li Cuo's short laughter coming from behind me alone in the noisy laughter.

I also heard a female voice laughing and saying: "Qiu Shui can accept sibling love, so let's see if I have a chance, sister?"

I think it's a very shameful thing for me to blush suddenly because of such a question. I should have a calm face and say "just a while ago" to them calmly.

But my cheeks were hot, Li Cu was still laughing softly behind me, I don't know what he was laughing at.

Lan Yue laughed and concluded: "Qiu Shui is still a virgin."

I kept calm: "No."

They were laughing again, and I said nonsense: "When I was a sophomore in high school."

They started booing, Li Cu's laughter still entered my ears slowly and clearly, and Lan Yue made the loudest booing: "Qiu Shui, be careful, and then choose the truth and ask for details."

This group of people must have been excited about playing just now, and they lost their faces. I feel a little annoying and don't want to play with them anymore.

I told them that my brother is here and I won’t play with them anymore, Lan Yue said: "Your brother is watching a play happily, and you were asked to play with us just now, isn't it, brother?"

Li Cuo said innocently, "I can't represent him."

I immediately stated that I had something to tell my brother that I would stop playing, Lan Yue snorted twice, and it was Li Cu who said that he had something to tell me that she let me go.

·

Li Cuo and I sat in the seat in front of the glass window, the place farthest from their game seats. I made a cup of scented tea for Li Cuo, and when I sat down, I whispered: "boring."

Ritsu glanced at me.

I said, "boring."

Li Cu asked me, "Isn't it fun?"

Of course not, the answer was so obvious that I simply hummed it quietly.

Li Cu glanced at me, I felt a little helpless in his eyes, he asked me with a smile: "Are you unhappy?"

"I'm not unhappy." I told him sincerely after reviewing my emotions carefully.

The corners of Li Cu's eyes were still slightly upturned, and he was always smiling whether he spoke or not. He just looked at me with his smiling eyes and said unhurriedly: "The time we met in Changkang , You seem to be impatient when your friend goes out with you, and now you are also impatient when playing games with your friends."

I told him, "Because I don't like playing with other people."

Li Cu dragged his tone and said: "This is not very good."

I didn't refute, but I don't think there is anything wrong with this.

I don't like intense pleasure, and while it sounds like I'm crazy, every midnight dream reminds me of something really bad.

My happiness is based on a certain pain that I can't counteract, it's disgusting.