sweet temptation

From morning to noon, I sat on the rattan chair in the garden for a whole morning.

In front of me is a blood rose in full bloom, it should be a blood rose.

Because as far as I can remember, I have never planted anything other than blood roses in my garden.

But I'm not sure yet.

Because my eyes are black and white.

Black petals, gray leaves, light gray sky, white clouds.

My favorite paints are placed on the rattan table, neatly arranged one by one.

All in various shades of black.

I close my eyes and open them again.

Still various shades of black.

I think this is probably a dream.

In the process of falling from the top floor of the [-]-story hotel, a short and black-and-white dream.

Maybe in the next moment, I will fall to the ground, my skull will be broken, my brain will be spilled, and my blood will flow everywhere.

At that time, my short dream will also come to an end.

I closed my eyes and waited for the pain to come.

However, time is too slow.

I waited and waited, but I never got to that moment, but I heard a familiar sound of footsteps.

I have heard this footstep for four years. It is the footsteps of my psychiatrist Jonathan.

He walked very lightly, as if he was afraid of frightening the butterflies that landed on the rose petals.

I turned around and happened to see a soft smile on his lips.

Familiar and unfamiliar.

I think I'm probably dead.

Otherwise I can't see him.

This person who also fell from the height of [-] floors.

Jonathan walked in front of me as usual, bent down, lightly picked up the hair from my ear and put it to the tip of my nose to sniff.Then he knelt down on one knee and offered me a carved diamond ring.Said obsessively, "Marry me, Chu Yun."

I am silent.

This scene is so familiar that I can't believe it.

Maybe it was the shock in my eyes that was too heavy.

Jonathan chuckled and said it again.

"Marry me, Chu Yun."

He just looked at me fixedly, focused and affectionate.

I lowered my eyes, not daring to look into his eyes, and said in a low voice, "Give me a rose with thorns."

Obediently, he stood up, walked around the rattan table and chairs, and plucked the most blooming blood rose from the flower stand.

His hand skillfully avoided the thorn, and he knelt down to me in front of me.

I focused my eyes on the sharpest thorns on the penis, stretched out my fingers, and pressed down.

Earlier than the pain was his worried eyes.

He threw away the rose and sucked my bloody index finger.

The pain dissipated, and the warm touch came from the fingertips.

I heard my flat voice sound, it was my reply to his marriage proposal.

I said: "Okay."

"I don't want a dress."

"I don't want a wedding."

"I don't want guests."

"I don't want wealth."

"I don't want the priest's blessing."

"I don't want friends and relatives coming."

"I don't want a gift from God."

"I don't want your lifetime commitment."

He calmly listened to my request and asked a question.

"Then what do you want, Chu Yun?"

I pointed to the blood rose abandoned by him, and said, "I only want that rose, and it will bloom undefeated."

He asked again: "Why?"

I closed my eyes and looked calm.

"Because it's proof that I'm alive."

It made me feel pain and let me know that my life can be done again.

I don't know if he understood my words.

All I know is that he took this rose and mounted it in my bedroom as a specimen.

He knelt down on one knee again and said, "Marry me, Chu Yun."

I didn't answer, but just stretched out my left hand, allowing him to bring the ring representing the whole life to my ring finger.

He hugged me ecstatically and refused to let go.

He didn't push me away until I had trouble breathing, and asked, "Can I kiss you?"

I am silent.

He tried to get closer to me, and the moment his lips were about to touch, Chu Ci's teasing smile suddenly popped up in my mind.

The hand involuntarily pushed him away.

He seemed disappointed.

The tone was still gentle, "I'll wait for you."

Then turn around and leave.

I pursed my lips and watched his back disappear through the door.