my brother became a scum

I drove downstairs to Zhang Chen's building, but I didn't know whether I should go in or not.

In the TV series, at this time, I should rush into the door, hug my ex-lover, and say I am sorry for your hard work, when the background music plays, both parties cry, and live a happy life from now on.

I was sitting in the car, the strength that supported me to come, but dissipated bit by bit, I started to ask myself, you got in, and then what?

I want to tell Zhang Chen, I know all about your suffering, and I will treat you well in the future?

I want to hug Zhang Chen and say that our future will be smooth and smooth, and you will never live like that again?

Do I really want to live with Zhang Chen? Or, do I still love him now?

I hesitated when I shouldn't have hesitated.

I remembered that before Zhang Chen left, I was already ready to divorce him, ready for a showdown, and I didn't want to be with him again.

Facts have proved that he left my world, and I can live on my own, and live a good life. I have a career, Chen An, and myself.

My life is busy but stable, and Zhang Chen, no matter when, he is a ticking time bomb.

Those friends of his in those years, the traps he set for me with his own hands, pierced my heart like dense thorns, and maybe I lived too well to bear the vague pain.

I feel sorry for Zhang Chen, but I also feel sorry for myself.

Some people always say that there is no need to care too much about the past, and the balance of love should not be divided into high and low, but when I am with Zhang Chen, I always feel that the bitterness is greater than the sweetness, and life is boring.

I lowered the window and lit a cigarette.

When the cigarette was half smoked, the mobile phone rang, and the two big characters "Zhang Chen" were shining brightly on the screen of the mobile phone.

I connected the phone and put it next to my ear: "Zhang Chen."

"Chen Heping, I can see you." Zhang Chen's voice came through the receiver with a little smile.

"Where are you?" I took another puff of cigarette, raised my head to look at the second floor of the villa, but couldn't see clearly, "Upstairs?"

"Well, as soon as I lowered my head, I saw you smoking downstairs, why didn't you come up?"

I stubbed out the cigarette butt, threw it out the window, and said, "Pass by and take a look, I have to go."

"Let's go, go and get on with your business. I'm here anyway. Whenever I have time, I'll come." Zhang Chen is rare to be gentle and considerate. If I said that 20 years ago, he would definitely not let go. Forced me to go in.

I pressed the button to close the window automatically, so that the window blocked his view a little bit, but asked: "Zhang Chen, do you love me?"

Zhang Chen didn't speak for a few seconds, the car window completely blocked the view from the window, just when I was about to say something more, he said: "I love you."

I don't know why, but the tears came down all at once.

When Zhang Chen left without saying goodbye, when I reunited with the downcast Zhang Chen, and when I learned everything Zhang Chen had experienced, I felt pity, heartache, and anger, but I could bear them all, but this sentence, I couldn't bear it at all.

I cried like a fool in the car door, I don't know how long I cried, but I wiped my face and wanted to drive out of here.

The phone rang again, and the word Zhang Chen came into view, like a dream or a nightmare.

I hung up the phone, but the other party called again, hung up again, and called again, repeating this seven or eight times.By the last time, the ringtone stopped ringing. I threw the phone aside, but heard a crackling sound. I turned my head and faced Zhang Chen's face through the window. He withdrew his hand and even waved at me. wave.

He shouldn't be able to see me, but he knew I heard it and guessed that I was looking at him.I noticed his new hairstyle, black and white, very good-looking, his complexion has improved a lot, and there is even an ear mask on his face, he is still in a wheelchair, but he is well dressed, look Not the slightest bit down.

I rolled down the window so he could see me, so I could see him more clearly.

He touched the bridge of his nose with his hand and said, "Seeing that your car doesn't leave, I'll come over and have a look."

"Now you see it."

"I asked the nurse to go back, can I trouble you to push me back?"

He spoke frankly, without embarrassment at all.I stared at him for a while, got out of the car and slammed the door, he raised his head and stretched out his hands to me.

"To hug."

"No hugs."

"To kiss."

"No kisses."

"Then what do you have?"

"Put your hands down and I'll push you in."

"Ok."

Zhang Chen put down his hand obediently, giving me the illusion that all he wanted was for me to push him in.

I seemed to be possessed by an evil spirit. As soon as I saw him, I forgot that I wanted to leave just now.

I was not used to pushing his wheelchair at first, but after a few steps, it went smoothly. We entered the gate of the yard, only to find that the ground was covered with thick ginkgo leaves.

"I remember that there are no ginkgo trees here."

"You need a background for taking pictures, and someone brought it over."

"...What are you taking pictures for?"

"I like."

I didn't speak anymore, pushing the wheelchair over the fallen leaves, creaking and creaking, I thought of the few moments in college, and forced myself not to think about it again.

I pushed him into the villa, and the nurse came over in a hurry, wanting to take over my work, but Zhang Chen stretched his hand back precisely, and grabbed my arm.He wasn't holding on tight enough and I knew I could break free.

But I didn't try to earn it. The nurse withdrew his hand with a embarrassed expression, and I could only continue to push forward.

"If you're not busy, stay and eat." Zhang Chen softly suggested.

"it is good."

Maybe it was because he was shaking my hand, but I actually agreed. The second after I agreed, Zhang Chen let go of my arm and put his hand on the armrest again.

I haven’t been in the kitchen for a long time. Zhang Chen is powerless in a wheelchair. The chef prepared the meals and served them on the table. I sat on one side of the long dining table. Zhang Chen didn’t sit on the other side, but sat next to me. On the other side, we ate in silence and didn't say anything.

After dinner, I was still thinking of an excuse to leave, but Zhang Chen thoughtfully gave me an excuse, and he asked me: "Are you busy with work and have to leave immediately."

I nodded, and he didn't look upset either.I put on my coat, and the nurse pushed Zhang Chen to send me away. I had already stepped out of the gate of the villa, but I heard Zhang Chen say, "Wait a minute."

I turned around to look at him, I was outside the door, he was inside, the villa was brightly lit, his face had some illusory beauty, blurring the boundaries of time.

He raised the corners of his mouth, his brows and eyes crooked with a smile: "You lean over, and I'll help you fix your tie."

"No need."

I refused coldly, but he looked at me quietly as if he was not angry at all.

I sighed, bent down, and said, "You can do it."

His hand touched my tie, my neckline tightened and I staggered a step, the next second he kissed my lips, my eyes widened in surprise, his tongue broke into my lips, presumptuous manifest its own existence.

I put my hand on his shoulder, trying to push him away, but the flesh under my hand was trembling slightly, and big and big tears rolled out of his eye sockets, and he had only me in his eyes.

I didn't push him away again, but bent down a little in coordination, with my palms dragging the back of his head, telling him to exert less effort.

He finally showed signs of terminating. The moment my tongue retreated, I broke into his territory and continued the kiss that should have ended in another way.

He blinked, with tears still hanging on his eyelashes, but he seemed to be unable to hold back his laughter. I let go of his lips and said, "I'll drive the car in, and he won't leave."

"Whatever you want, I'm here, you can leave if you want, stay if you want..."

Zhang Chen's lips were wet red, and his fingers were already clenched, but he was about to say this sentence.

"Stop talking," I interrupted him, pinching his cheek, "I'm afraid you'll cry again."

I turned around and went out the door, only to realize that the car had long since disappeared. The phone rang just right, and when I answered the phone, I heard Zhang Chen say, "I've got someone to send a tow truck to come and tow your car away."

I couldn't laugh or cry, and asked him instead, "You just don't want me to leave tonight, do you?"

"Yes, if you leave, I'm afraid you won't come back for a long time."

"You never thought, if you don't leave and see that the car is gone, what will you think?"

"I thought you were going to leave."

"..."

Should it be Zhang Chen?He can always guess the deepest secret in my heart.

"So you said you would come back, I'm very happy," Zhang Chen said with an impatient smile, "Come back soon, Brother Ping."

I clutched my phone, turned around, and saw the nurse pushing Zhang Chen, looking at me at the gate of the courtyard, I hung up the phone, and walked towards him step by step.

Zhang Chen stretched out his hand and said, "I want a hug."

I looked at him indifferently, and laughed in my heart that the man in front of me was too coquettish, but the instinct of my body surpassed my reason, and I reached out and hugged him.

My feet creaked on the leaves.

Zhang Chen rested his head on my shoulder and said, "What are you thinking?"

"I was wondering why you were so heavy."

"..."

Zhang Chen stopped talking, he probably didn't expect me to be so confused.

In fact, it may not be that Zhang Chen is too heavy, it may be that I am also old, and my physical strength is not as good as that of a young man. Now I can hold him up, thanks to my continuous exercise all these years.

"Chen Heping?"

"how?"

"I miss you very much."

"Oh."

"I love you very much."

"Ah."

"Am I ugly?"

"Correct."

"get out."

"Do not."

Zhang Chen bit my shoulder through the clothes. It was very light and didn't hurt at all. He turned his head and licked my neck with his tongue. I had to pat his butt and said, "Don't fuck."

"Am I ugly?"

"Yes."

"Do you not love me anymore?"

I stopped blurting out, and said coldly: "Don't think about it."

He stopped talking, let me carry him back to the bedroom, the nurse adjusted the footwashing water, and I watched him wash his feet.

When the nurse left, he said very naturally: "You don't love me anymore."