martyrdom

The two hours spent with Daisy were pure and beautiful. She and Yuan Fei took the girl for a walk in the nearby park, stopping and stopping along the way in the sunset and dusk scenery.Listening to Yuan Fei talking about books and literature with the girl in simple terms, Yu'er's heart softened, and she couldn't help but imagine what she would look like as a wife and mother.

Daisy seemed to enjoy talking to Yuan Fei and listening to what Yuan Fei said to her.Two figures, one big and one small, cuddle up and walk in the sunset, the picture is extremely warm.

The two hours of company, Yu'er was worried that it was too short, but Yuan Fei didn't waste a second.Yu'er could feel that she was doing her best to help Daisy, using her talents and qualities to shape this lucky girl into the outstanding temperament she is today.

This child will grow up to be a lovely person like her.

From sending the child away to returning home, Yu'er couldn't wait for Yuan Fei to speak.She could have a hunch that Daisy's life experience might have something to do with Yuan Fei's agreement to cooperate, and the two adopters who committed suicide might have a different relationship with her.

Or maybe this is Yuan Fei's biggest knot, the root of her calmness, introversion, resolute indifference.Yu'er was fortunate enough to make a small opening for her quietness, introversion, resoluteness and indifference, and also experienced the unknown beauty, so she has the obligation to help her completely untie the knot in her heart, so that she will be reborn from now on, and bid farewell to the past.

The clock has passed nine o'clock, Yu'er is sitting on the sofa flipping through a book, Yuan Fei is holding a notebook and typing, still has no intention of opening her mouth.

The book in her hand was turned to the end, and Yu'er wanted to mention it, but after all, she didn't know how big the matter was and what it meant to Yuan Fei, so she didn't dare to speak casually.Closed the book, looked up at the watch and was about to get up, Yuan Fei finally looked away from the computer screen, hesitated to speak, just said softly: "Are you going back?"

Yu'er stood up and stretched her neck: "No hurry, I... go out to get some air."

Yuan Fei just nodded.

The night wind on the balcony was soft, Yu'er looked at her balcony from Yuan Fei's perspective, it was one floor lower, and she could see even the corners of the ground.Different angles, same nostalgia, I don't know if there was a night when Yuan Fei lingered in this square inch like her, full of hope for a ray of light that lit up on the opposite side.

There was a slight sound behind him, but Yu'er didn't look back.A moment later, an arm was wrapped around her waist, and then the whole back was pressed softly. Yuan Fei put his chin on her shoulder, just like what she had done to her, and pressed his cheek against her neck.

Yu'er evoked a gentle smile, didn't move, and quietly enjoyed Yuan Fei's closeness.

"Do you think it's amazing..." Yuan Fei whispered in her ear, "We used to be separated by such a long distance, and even looking at each other was a luxury, but now we can stand here together, as if..."

Yu'er smiled silently, waiting for her to finish speaking.

"It seems to be together, living for many years."

Yu'er raised her hand and covered Yuan Fei's hand on her waist.Yuan Fei let go of her waist, adjusted the angle of her wrist, and interlocked her fingers.

"Yu'er..." Yuan Fei called her suddenly.She hummed lightly, but she didn't expect Yuan Fei to say something like this: "Come and live with me."

It was extremely quiet for a while, and the night wind caressed the wind chime in front of the door, making a pleasant soft ringing.I don't know someone in someone's house is playing the piano against the moon. The distant sound of the piano is like the ding-dong of running water, flowing slowly in the night.

Yu'er was embraced by Yuan Fei, and suddenly felt unrealistic.If all this is just a dream, then is this dream too happy and complete?

"Why did you bring this up all of a sudden?"

Yuan Fei smiled softly in her ear: "You ask this, are you waiting for me to talk sweetly to you?"

"……you caught me."

"Okay." Yuan Fei squeezed her hand and said softly, "I will tell you whatever you want to hear."

As if a storm with dire consequences was brewing, Yu'er could feel the tension transmitted from her.So before she could speak, Yu'er stopped her first: "I will listen to whatever you want to say. Don't force yourself, I can wait."

Yuan Fei exhaled lightly, but her attitude was extremely firm: "No, I can't wait." She let go of Yu'er's hand, walked to Yu'er's side, leaned side by side on the fence, and said, "The one who graduated from junior high school During the summer vacation, by chance, I came across a fan article written by Lily Xiang. The article was written delicately and touchingly, and I liked it very much. I read it many times, and it was the first time I entered the circle. The obsession limited to words has not given any in-depth consideration to myself."

It starts with words, which is probably the case for many people.

"The author of fanfiction is an older sister who is already working. We were lucky to have a chat. Under her inspiration, I tried to write for the first time. When I was in the first and second grades of high school, the things I wrote were green and boring. , The reader has always been only her. Those days were really good, writing, chatting, I was very dependent on her, I couldn't tell what it was like, until one day, she found the other half."

Looking at Yuan Fei's quiet profile, Yu'er suddenly felt a little sad.feel sorry for her.

"In six years, from the third year of high school to the first year of graduate school, I witnessed her go from liking to deeply in love, and then parting with her lover, because of the opposition of the family and the impact of public opinion. I have never met her from the beginning to the end. The reason why netizens do not meet There are many, and we are probably the ones who are content with the status quo. But she mentioned me in her last words, entrusted their adopted daughter to me, and asked me to keep writing. That was two years ago, when I first attended the memorial service I saw a picture of her on the Internet, smiling so beautifully and so tenderly."

At this point, Yuan Fei was silent for a long time.No choking, no tears, only a quiet sacrifice.

"After I came back, I started to write "Double Burial". For more than two years, I only had to study and write in my life. During that time, I lived a monotonous and painful life. I always thought wildly and couldn't sleep at night. I I have tried to think about her meaning to me and the whole gay community countless times, and I have gradually discovered many things that I can and must do, such as giving them an explanation and using the way she taught me. So "Double Halfway through the writing of Burial, I signed a company, published my previous works, and cooperated with various publicity activities for fame and fortune. Although all these went against my original intention of writing. But Kang Yu is right, this circle is too small There are many restrictions, even if I spend my whole life, I will never be able to achieve what I want."

The night is vast, and Yuan Fei is like an ambitious politician at this moment, firm and full of hope: "I never thought of going to the final step. Legalization is a height that I can't reach, and it's not a company that is accompanied by words. People should be touched. I just want to use my words to make this unbelievable thing in the eyes of many people less unbelievable. I thought it would be easy, but it is really difficult. Outsiders see Lily The subject matter should be avoided for fear that my article will never go out. Before the finalization of "Double Burial", I had already planned to give up, because I didn't want this work with her as the theme to be tarnished by fame and fortune like the previous ones. After that, it still died without a disease.”

Yu'er had a premonition of her next turning point, and her heartbeat gradually accelerated until it was completely out of rhythm.

Sure enough, Yuan Fei turned her head and looked at her, looking at her with a treasure that she had never felt before: "I thought that meeting her had exhausted all my luck in my life, but maybe her ending was bleak, and part of my luck was lost." You gave it back to me so that I could meet you. You didn’t ask anything, you didn’t say anything, everything was logical, like our love, it’s completely normal for you, normal enough to show it unabashedly In front of others, it is the same as all people who love each other. At that time, I was not unable to see how I felt for you, but I was really afraid. This fear accompanied me every day and night for two years, until I met you for the first time That day, I even dreamed that we committed suicide by jumping into the sea together..."

Yu'er suddenly grabbed her hand with a force that made her feel at ease.She heard Yu'er ask herself: "Yuan Fei, when did you decide to hold the signing event?"

Before she could answer, Yu'er had already answered for her: "It was the first time I took you to the bookstore, and you made a call on the platform to contact this matter, right?"

Yuan Fei looked at Yu'er's serious and serious expression, and nodded.

Yu'er closed her eyes, leaned over and hugged her tightly.The voice in the ear trembled and choked slightly: "It turns out that at that time, I had already played the role of allowing you to regain your faith and fight against traditional values ​​again. I don't know anything, and I still say that to you... "

As if suddenly realizing something, Yu'er let go of her, her eyes still glistening with shock, "You want to use Kang Yu to expose "Double Burial" to the public?"

Yuan Fei smiled, raised her hand to wipe away the tears from the corners of her eyes, and nodded slightly.

"how do you want to do it?"

"Do as he said. But I will leave a foreshadowing that no one can see, and then prepare a side story to debunk the foreshadowing in the main text and reveal the hero's female identity."

Yu'er was so shocked by this thought that she couldn't speak.It took a long time before he hummed, and it took another long time before he thought about it and said, "It's a bit...shocking."

Yuan Fei shook his head meaningfully: "When you like two characters, a reasonable gender change will not make you disgusted. I think I can do this. I want to let those who are biased against this People have self-doubt, and they can still accept and feel good when they find out that the male protagonist is actually a woman. This is the first step. If it goes well, the end of "Double Burial" can free me from Kang Yu's control, then the second step, I will Take advantage of the popularity and fame brought to me by the double burial to write a complete Lily novel. Even if it cannot be published by then, the reading volume will not be comparable to what it is now, and the atmosphere of public opinion will give me the desired result."

Yu'er listened to her blueprint, but was not as hopeful as she was.In front of someone like Kang Yu, Yuan Fei is so innocent that she is almost helpless.Taking Kang Yu as a risk, I'm afraid that every step of the way in the future will be dangerous, and one wrong step will ruin your reputation.Yuan Fei has already received the letter of appointment from the university, and she will gradually become a lecturer, tutor, and professor, and gain fame and prestige in the academic world. With her ability, it is only a matter of time.It's a pity to take risks.

But Yu'er couldn't stop it, and couldn't stop it either.She has her persistence, responsibility and courage, all Yu'er can do is support.

I support it wholeheartedly, even at the expense of everything.

Yuan Fei was still waiting for her opinion, Yu'er embraced her again, and whispered in her ear: "I think your method is very good. I will move here to accompany you as soon as possible, Mr. Landlord, please be more in the future care."

The author has something to say:

So Yuan Fei agreed to be with Yu'er, what kind of psychological barrier did Yuan Fei overcome, do you understand?

When she was teased back then, there was a reason for the feeling of wanting to love Yu'er but not daring to love.