If he could do it all over again, Han Yun would definitely not choose to torture himself by taking poison.
Although chronic poison is not as good as paraquat that can burn the esophagus and damage human tissues, it will also damage the internal organs of the human body after a long time. Han Yun was lying on the bed, and there was no pain anywhere on his body.
He had to take painkillers almost every day, and at this time, he didn't care that the painkillers were bad for his health. Han Yun only wanted to suffer less.But the painkillers have a time limit after all, and he would often wake up in the middle of the night in pain, and in the end he couldn't take it anymore, so he had to ask H to block the pain.
Han Yun is having a hard time, and Shen Xuanhe is not much better. Seeing Han Yun being tortured, he is sadder than anyone else.
Shen Xuanhe always sleeps with him at night, and Han Yun will wake up if there is any movement, and then stare at him all night without sleep.
Looking at his bloodshot eyes, Han Yun suddenly had an idea.
After drinking the medicine one day, Shen Xuanhe lay on the bed with him in his arms. Han Yun asked H to briefly open up his perception of pain. His body froze and he broke out in a cold sweat instantly.
"what happened?"
Shen Xuanhe noticed it immediately, he raised his hand and touched Han Yun's head, leaned over and pressed against his forehead, and said in a low voice, "Still uncomfortable?"
"It hurts." Han Yun closed his eyes, "It's like... a fire is burning."
In fact, it's not just that, even every breath is like being pricked by thousands of needles, he grabbed Shen Xuan and the clothes on his chest vigorously, only dared to inhale and exhale, but still trembling with pain .
Shen Xuanhe hugged him at a loss, he didn't know what else to do, he could only comfort him in a low voice, and kept kissing his forehead.
Han Yun gasped, and whispered, "Shen Xuanhe, I... I beg you for one thing."
"No...you don't need to use that word," Shen Xuanhe kissed his lips lightly, his slightly trembling voice sounded dazed and helpless, "I will promise, I will promise anything."
He was originally the most powerful person in the world, but at this moment, he was like a disabled person, powerless to what was happening.
"Shen Xuanhe," Han Yun fumbled to hold his hand, and the palms soaked in cold sweat were pressed against Shen Xuanhe's ice-like hands, "Shen Xuanhe...I want you to kill me. "
Shen Xuanhe's eyes widened suddenly, and he backed away in disbelief, looked straight into those empty eyes, and asked again as if he didn't hear clearly: "You, what did you say?"
"Kill me," Han Yun held his hand hard, curled up like a shrimp and curled up in Shen Xuanhe's arms, with his forehead resting on his chest, "Kill me... Shen Xuanhe."
He murmured in a low voice, digging deep into Shen Xuanhe's heart every word.
"Ayun - you, you are sleepy, you -"
"I'm sober." Han Yun said, his long eyelashes trembling slightly, "I just... it hurts too much, Shen Xuanhe, I don't want to live my last days like dying."
Shen Xuanhe stared at him blankly, his mind went blank.
"You always say you like me," Han Yun said with a weak voice, intermittently, with a smile, "but you have never done anything for me... This time, it's just for me, for me, can you No matter how painful it is, do one thing, okay?"
"No, I—I can't—"
Shen Xuanhe was tongue-tied, his arm around Han Yun was as stiff as a stone, "I can't—I—how can I..." He couldn't say that word.
"I have no choice."
Han Yun said that he was a little tired, but he didn't expect pain to be such an energy-consuming thing.
"And you... Shen Xuanhe, you are the same."
He is not too worried about the final result. In ancient times, such things like euthanasia did not pay as much attention to the so-called human ethics and morality as in modern times. What's more, the matter has developed to this point. Everyone knows that the end is the easiest for Han Yun It is also the most straightforward option.
Shen Xuanhe got along with him day and night, and Han Yun couldn't believe that he didn't have that kind of thought when he saw himself suffering from illness.All Shen Xuanhe needs is to pass his own level, and as long as Han Yun is there, this will not be a big problem.
Shen Xuanhe stared blankly at the twirling hair on top of Han Yun's head, he had fallen asleep again - or it would be more appropriate to say that he passed out.He carefully lifted the quilt and got up, asked the servant to fetch a basin of warm water, helped Han Yun wipe his body soaked in cold sweat, and then changed into clean clothes.
After finishing everything, Shen Xuanhe knelt and sat beside the bed, quietly watching Han Yun's sleeping face.
He was very thin, with sunken cheeks, high browbones, and a poor complexion. His thin lips were so pale that there was no blood in them.Even in his sleep, his brows were frowning and his breathing was weak.
Shen Xuanhe held his hand and pressed it to his forehead. He knew that it was hopeless now, and he understood Han Yun's choice, but——the one who asked him to do it?Let him kill his beloved sweetheart with his own hands?
How cruel.
However, at the same time, Shen Xuanhe knew that the happiness he could bring to Han Yun in this life was very little. As Han Yun said, he never asked him what he wanted, let alone gave him what he wanted. Anything he wants.
So... If this is what Han Yun really hoped for, and if he is the only one who is in trouble in this whole matter, then Shen Xuanhe seems to have no reason not to do so.
Now, compared with Han Yun, his wish is the most insignificant.And Shen Xuanhe has been selfish for most of his life, and he doesn't want the last impression he left on Han Yun is that he is a villain who can only grab and plunder and do whatever it takes to achieve his goals.
He held Han Yun's hand and pressed it to his chest. After making up his mind, his heartbeat seemed to calm down a lot. He stared at Han Yun's thin cheeks, his eyes gently traced his outline, and then leaned his head to kiss his lips lightly. kiss.
fair enough……
The most difficult decision, the most difficult choice, let him solve it all.
******
During the period when his condition was getting worse, Han Yun could only relax when the painkillers were effective, sit up and eat liquid food, and talk to Shen Xuanhe.
Today is New Year's Eve, New Year's Eve, the snow outside is heavy, Han Yun hasn't gone out for a long time.That night, when Shen Xuanhe came back, he brought a tray with a snowman on it.
"This is a snowman, I made it myself."
Shen Xuanhe said, put the tray on Han Yun's bedside, and then took his hand to touch it.
"Well……"
Han Yun touched it up and down, tapped the snowman's head with his index finger, and said with a smile, "It's very beautiful."
There is floor heating in the dormitory, and the snowman is melting at a speed visible to the naked eye.
Shen Xuanhe hugged Han Yun and watched silently with him.
The snowman is getting smaller and smaller.
"Today, it's New Year's Eve." Han Yun said suddenly.
"Ah."
"Will there be fireworks?"
Han Yun asked, although the New Year is approaching, but because of his relationship, the atmosphere in the palace is not very good, and no one dares to celebrate with great fanfare at this time, for fear of offending the emperor.
"Yes." Shen Xuanhe said in a low voice.
"Really?" Han Yun opened his eyes slightly, looking a little surprised, and his empty peach eyes seemed to light up, "I want to see, go outside and see."
Shen Xuanhe rubbed the tip of his nose and hissed, "Okay."
He wrapped Han Yun in layer after layer of clothes, then put on a cloak, and took him to the Zhaixing Pavilion, which was the highest place in the entire palace.
Shen Xuanhe seemed to have already arranged it, and the floor of the top floor of Zhaixing Pavilion was covered with a thick cashmere blanket, making it very comfortable to sit on.
A dark guard approached with a tray, on which was the little snowman that had melted most of it in the dormitory just now, and beside the snowman was a small wine glass filled with dark brown liquid.
Han Yun held the snowman in his hand and touched the wine glass. He wanted to pick it up, but Shen Xuanhe grabbed his hand.
Han Yun couldn't see, but Shen Xuanhe's hand was shaking violently, and his breathing was disordered.
"I don't want to drink now," Han Yun flipped his palm over, held his hand instead, and said in a low voice, "Shen Xuanhe, I'll spend the New Year with you."
The snowman was melted by the temperature of his palm, turned into snow water and dripped from between his fingers, Shen Xuanhe tremblingly grabbed his lips, kissed him tenderly, the tip of his tongue swept over his palate, and licked every place meticulously, Then he wrapped his tongue around and sucked and licked.
"Fireworks are coming."
Shen Xuanhe said, raising his hands to cover his ears vainly.Han Yun couldn't see, he was afraid that he would be frightened.
"Ah."
Han Yun responded sullenly, then raised his head and kissed him back.
Shen Xuanhe trembled all over.
In the next second, a large and enthusiastic firework bloomed in the air. Han Yun held the tip of his tongue and bit it lightly as before, teasingly.
With wet and salty liquid flowing into his mouth, Han Yun smiled and said vaguely: "Happy New Year."
"……Happy New Year."
Han Yun reached for the wine glass and drank it down in one gulp, this time Shen Xuanhe did not stop him.
Compared with the continuous pain before, this time is obviously nothing.
When the host was on the verge of death, the system would automatically block the pain, so Han Yun couldn't feel anything. He leaned in Shen Xuanhe's arms, only feeling colder and colder.
Shen Xuanhe gritted his teeth, whimpered and wanted to kiss him, but Han Yun turned his head away.
He laughed, but his voice was so weak that he could hardly hear it, "Dangerous, don't make trouble..."
Shen Xuanhe hugged him tightly, tears streaming down her face silently.
"Shen Xuanhe..."
"I'm here."
"That day... in the dungeon, I know, it was you."
Shen Xuanhe choked for breath.
"But still, thank you."
Han Yun lost his strength, he leaned on Shen Xuanhe's chest, his heartbeat was in his ears, and he was getting farther and farther away from him.
"You are fine... Shen Xuanhe."
After saying this, he completely lost consciousness.
Shen Xuanhe's mind was complicated, he still hugged Han Yun, even though the body in his arms gradually became colder than ice and snow.
He sat in the Zhaixing Pavilion all night, and the fireworks blared all night. As morning approached, the east side was turned white, and Shen Xuanhe moved slowly, picked up Han Yun, and went downstairs.
The dark guard and the eunuch mustache followed behind him, but no one dared to speak out.
Shen Xuanhe carried Han Yun all the way back to the bedroom, scrubbed his body with a cloth towel as usual, and put on new clothes for him.
After finishing everything, he opened the door and went out. The head of the dark guard and the big eunuch mustache had been guarding outside, all ready to go, as if planning to rush in if something went wrong.
"Have the boys from my royal brother's family come to Beijing?"
The dark guard bowed his head and said: "Return to the master, about half a day's journey away."
"it is good."
Shen Xuan agreed, and then asked: "How is the tomb for the joint burial I requested?"
"Returning to the master, the site selection took some time, and the subordinates have ordered someone to urge the construction team to speed up the process."
"ASAP."
Seeing Shen Xuanhe turning around to go back to the palace, Hu's eyelids twitched, and he boldly said: "Your Majesty, you, you—"
"I'm fine," Shen Xuanhe held on to the door frame, but didn't look back, "There are still many things to deal with."
Seeing that he was abnormally calm, the heart of the mustache was trembling with fright, and the two beards were shaking like crazy.
"After those young princes enter the palace, they will be assessed according to the arrangements I have made in advance. Each person's situation must be submitted with a specific observation statement, understand?"
"My subordinate understands."
Bazihu was in a daze the whole time. He didn't know until today that Shen Xuan and several young princes from various fiefdoms entered the palace and built a joint burial mausoleum. These seem to have been going on in secret.Reminiscent of Han Yun's death from illness, and there is no concubine or concubine in the harem, let alone a son who can succeed to the throne——
Mustache is a little dizzy.
***
When Han Yun woke up again, what he saw was not a white system space, but a small room with simple layout, which looked like an office.
He collected himself, opened the door and walked out.
Outside the door is a long corridor, which is crowded with dumpling-like balls, emitting light of different colors.
"Welcome back, Chief!"
Seeing him come out, the regiments puffed up their chests and shouted slogans in unison.
Han Yun: "..."
He glanced around and found a golden dumpling that looked familiar.
But before he could make a sound, the restless regiments suddenly quieted down, and Moses spread out and arranged on both sides like dividing the sea.
In the silence, a figure came from the other end of the corridor. Against the light, Han Yun couldn't see his face clearly, but he felt familiar.
He approached slowly, and finally came to Han Yun, knelt down on one knee, looked up at him and smiled.
He took Han Yun's hand, rubbed it affectionately, and then pressed a kiss on the back of his hand.
"Master, welcome home."
Although chronic poison is not as good as paraquat that can burn the esophagus and damage human tissues, it will also damage the internal organs of the human body after a long time. Han Yun was lying on the bed, and there was no pain anywhere on his body.
He had to take painkillers almost every day, and at this time, he didn't care that the painkillers were bad for his health. Han Yun only wanted to suffer less.But the painkillers have a time limit after all, and he would often wake up in the middle of the night in pain, and in the end he couldn't take it anymore, so he had to ask H to block the pain.
Han Yun is having a hard time, and Shen Xuanhe is not much better. Seeing Han Yun being tortured, he is sadder than anyone else.
Shen Xuanhe always sleeps with him at night, and Han Yun will wake up if there is any movement, and then stare at him all night without sleep.
Looking at his bloodshot eyes, Han Yun suddenly had an idea.
After drinking the medicine one day, Shen Xuanhe lay on the bed with him in his arms. Han Yun asked H to briefly open up his perception of pain. His body froze and he broke out in a cold sweat instantly.
"what happened?"
Shen Xuanhe noticed it immediately, he raised his hand and touched Han Yun's head, leaned over and pressed against his forehead, and said in a low voice, "Still uncomfortable?"
"It hurts." Han Yun closed his eyes, "It's like... a fire is burning."
In fact, it's not just that, even every breath is like being pricked by thousands of needles, he grabbed Shen Xuan and the clothes on his chest vigorously, only dared to inhale and exhale, but still trembling with pain .
Shen Xuanhe hugged him at a loss, he didn't know what else to do, he could only comfort him in a low voice, and kept kissing his forehead.
Han Yun gasped, and whispered, "Shen Xuanhe, I... I beg you for one thing."
"No...you don't need to use that word," Shen Xuanhe kissed his lips lightly, his slightly trembling voice sounded dazed and helpless, "I will promise, I will promise anything."
He was originally the most powerful person in the world, but at this moment, he was like a disabled person, powerless to what was happening.
"Shen Xuanhe," Han Yun fumbled to hold his hand, and the palms soaked in cold sweat were pressed against Shen Xuanhe's ice-like hands, "Shen Xuanhe...I want you to kill me. "
Shen Xuanhe's eyes widened suddenly, and he backed away in disbelief, looked straight into those empty eyes, and asked again as if he didn't hear clearly: "You, what did you say?"
"Kill me," Han Yun held his hand hard, curled up like a shrimp and curled up in Shen Xuanhe's arms, with his forehead resting on his chest, "Kill me... Shen Xuanhe."
He murmured in a low voice, digging deep into Shen Xuanhe's heart every word.
"Ayun - you, you are sleepy, you -"
"I'm sober." Han Yun said, his long eyelashes trembling slightly, "I just... it hurts too much, Shen Xuanhe, I don't want to live my last days like dying."
Shen Xuanhe stared at him blankly, his mind went blank.
"You always say you like me," Han Yun said with a weak voice, intermittently, with a smile, "but you have never done anything for me... This time, it's just for me, for me, can you No matter how painful it is, do one thing, okay?"
"No, I—I can't—"
Shen Xuanhe was tongue-tied, his arm around Han Yun was as stiff as a stone, "I can't—I—how can I..." He couldn't say that word.
"I have no choice."
Han Yun said that he was a little tired, but he didn't expect pain to be such an energy-consuming thing.
"And you... Shen Xuanhe, you are the same."
He is not too worried about the final result. In ancient times, such things like euthanasia did not pay as much attention to the so-called human ethics and morality as in modern times. What's more, the matter has developed to this point. Everyone knows that the end is the easiest for Han Yun It is also the most straightforward option.
Shen Xuanhe got along with him day and night, and Han Yun couldn't believe that he didn't have that kind of thought when he saw himself suffering from illness.All Shen Xuanhe needs is to pass his own level, and as long as Han Yun is there, this will not be a big problem.
Shen Xuanhe stared blankly at the twirling hair on top of Han Yun's head, he had fallen asleep again - or it would be more appropriate to say that he passed out.He carefully lifted the quilt and got up, asked the servant to fetch a basin of warm water, helped Han Yun wipe his body soaked in cold sweat, and then changed into clean clothes.
After finishing everything, Shen Xuanhe knelt and sat beside the bed, quietly watching Han Yun's sleeping face.
He was very thin, with sunken cheeks, high browbones, and a poor complexion. His thin lips were so pale that there was no blood in them.Even in his sleep, his brows were frowning and his breathing was weak.
Shen Xuanhe held his hand and pressed it to his forehead. He knew that it was hopeless now, and he understood Han Yun's choice, but——the one who asked him to do it?Let him kill his beloved sweetheart with his own hands?
How cruel.
However, at the same time, Shen Xuanhe knew that the happiness he could bring to Han Yun in this life was very little. As Han Yun said, he never asked him what he wanted, let alone gave him what he wanted. Anything he wants.
So... If this is what Han Yun really hoped for, and if he is the only one who is in trouble in this whole matter, then Shen Xuanhe seems to have no reason not to do so.
Now, compared with Han Yun, his wish is the most insignificant.And Shen Xuanhe has been selfish for most of his life, and he doesn't want the last impression he left on Han Yun is that he is a villain who can only grab and plunder and do whatever it takes to achieve his goals.
He held Han Yun's hand and pressed it to his chest. After making up his mind, his heartbeat seemed to calm down a lot. He stared at Han Yun's thin cheeks, his eyes gently traced his outline, and then leaned his head to kiss his lips lightly. kiss.
fair enough……
The most difficult decision, the most difficult choice, let him solve it all.
******
During the period when his condition was getting worse, Han Yun could only relax when the painkillers were effective, sit up and eat liquid food, and talk to Shen Xuanhe.
Today is New Year's Eve, New Year's Eve, the snow outside is heavy, Han Yun hasn't gone out for a long time.That night, when Shen Xuanhe came back, he brought a tray with a snowman on it.
"This is a snowman, I made it myself."
Shen Xuanhe said, put the tray on Han Yun's bedside, and then took his hand to touch it.
"Well……"
Han Yun touched it up and down, tapped the snowman's head with his index finger, and said with a smile, "It's very beautiful."
There is floor heating in the dormitory, and the snowman is melting at a speed visible to the naked eye.
Shen Xuanhe hugged Han Yun and watched silently with him.
The snowman is getting smaller and smaller.
"Today, it's New Year's Eve." Han Yun said suddenly.
"Ah."
"Will there be fireworks?"
Han Yun asked, although the New Year is approaching, but because of his relationship, the atmosphere in the palace is not very good, and no one dares to celebrate with great fanfare at this time, for fear of offending the emperor.
"Yes." Shen Xuanhe said in a low voice.
"Really?" Han Yun opened his eyes slightly, looking a little surprised, and his empty peach eyes seemed to light up, "I want to see, go outside and see."
Shen Xuanhe rubbed the tip of his nose and hissed, "Okay."
He wrapped Han Yun in layer after layer of clothes, then put on a cloak, and took him to the Zhaixing Pavilion, which was the highest place in the entire palace.
Shen Xuanhe seemed to have already arranged it, and the floor of the top floor of Zhaixing Pavilion was covered with a thick cashmere blanket, making it very comfortable to sit on.
A dark guard approached with a tray, on which was the little snowman that had melted most of it in the dormitory just now, and beside the snowman was a small wine glass filled with dark brown liquid.
Han Yun held the snowman in his hand and touched the wine glass. He wanted to pick it up, but Shen Xuanhe grabbed his hand.
Han Yun couldn't see, but Shen Xuanhe's hand was shaking violently, and his breathing was disordered.
"I don't want to drink now," Han Yun flipped his palm over, held his hand instead, and said in a low voice, "Shen Xuanhe, I'll spend the New Year with you."
The snowman was melted by the temperature of his palm, turned into snow water and dripped from between his fingers, Shen Xuanhe tremblingly grabbed his lips, kissed him tenderly, the tip of his tongue swept over his palate, and licked every place meticulously, Then he wrapped his tongue around and sucked and licked.
"Fireworks are coming."
Shen Xuanhe said, raising his hands to cover his ears vainly.Han Yun couldn't see, he was afraid that he would be frightened.
"Ah."
Han Yun responded sullenly, then raised his head and kissed him back.
Shen Xuanhe trembled all over.
In the next second, a large and enthusiastic firework bloomed in the air. Han Yun held the tip of his tongue and bit it lightly as before, teasingly.
With wet and salty liquid flowing into his mouth, Han Yun smiled and said vaguely: "Happy New Year."
"……Happy New Year."
Han Yun reached for the wine glass and drank it down in one gulp, this time Shen Xuanhe did not stop him.
Compared with the continuous pain before, this time is obviously nothing.
When the host was on the verge of death, the system would automatically block the pain, so Han Yun couldn't feel anything. He leaned in Shen Xuanhe's arms, only feeling colder and colder.
Shen Xuanhe gritted his teeth, whimpered and wanted to kiss him, but Han Yun turned his head away.
He laughed, but his voice was so weak that he could hardly hear it, "Dangerous, don't make trouble..."
Shen Xuanhe hugged him tightly, tears streaming down her face silently.
"Shen Xuanhe..."
"I'm here."
"That day... in the dungeon, I know, it was you."
Shen Xuanhe choked for breath.
"But still, thank you."
Han Yun lost his strength, he leaned on Shen Xuanhe's chest, his heartbeat was in his ears, and he was getting farther and farther away from him.
"You are fine... Shen Xuanhe."
After saying this, he completely lost consciousness.
Shen Xuanhe's mind was complicated, he still hugged Han Yun, even though the body in his arms gradually became colder than ice and snow.
He sat in the Zhaixing Pavilion all night, and the fireworks blared all night. As morning approached, the east side was turned white, and Shen Xuanhe moved slowly, picked up Han Yun, and went downstairs.
The dark guard and the eunuch mustache followed behind him, but no one dared to speak out.
Shen Xuanhe carried Han Yun all the way back to the bedroom, scrubbed his body with a cloth towel as usual, and put on new clothes for him.
After finishing everything, he opened the door and went out. The head of the dark guard and the big eunuch mustache had been guarding outside, all ready to go, as if planning to rush in if something went wrong.
"Have the boys from my royal brother's family come to Beijing?"
The dark guard bowed his head and said: "Return to the master, about half a day's journey away."
"it is good."
Shen Xuan agreed, and then asked: "How is the tomb for the joint burial I requested?"
"Returning to the master, the site selection took some time, and the subordinates have ordered someone to urge the construction team to speed up the process."
"ASAP."
Seeing Shen Xuanhe turning around to go back to the palace, Hu's eyelids twitched, and he boldly said: "Your Majesty, you, you—"
"I'm fine," Shen Xuanhe held on to the door frame, but didn't look back, "There are still many things to deal with."
Seeing that he was abnormally calm, the heart of the mustache was trembling with fright, and the two beards were shaking like crazy.
"After those young princes enter the palace, they will be assessed according to the arrangements I have made in advance. Each person's situation must be submitted with a specific observation statement, understand?"
"My subordinate understands."
Bazihu was in a daze the whole time. He didn't know until today that Shen Xuan and several young princes from various fiefdoms entered the palace and built a joint burial mausoleum. These seem to have been going on in secret.Reminiscent of Han Yun's death from illness, and there is no concubine or concubine in the harem, let alone a son who can succeed to the throne——
Mustache is a little dizzy.
***
When Han Yun woke up again, what he saw was not a white system space, but a small room with simple layout, which looked like an office.
He collected himself, opened the door and walked out.
Outside the door is a long corridor, which is crowded with dumpling-like balls, emitting light of different colors.
"Welcome back, Chief!"
Seeing him come out, the regiments puffed up their chests and shouted slogans in unison.
Han Yun: "..."
He glanced around and found a golden dumpling that looked familiar.
But before he could make a sound, the restless regiments suddenly quieted down, and Moses spread out and arranged on both sides like dividing the sea.
In the silence, a figure came from the other end of the corridor. Against the light, Han Yun couldn't see his face clearly, but he felt familiar.
He approached slowly, and finally came to Han Yun, knelt down on one knee, looked up at him and smiled.
He took Han Yun's hand, rubbed it affectionately, and then pressed a kiss on the back of his hand.
"Master, welcome home."
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