i want to go home

It has been a month since Xie Xilei took Xie Yuming away.Looking back now, Li Qian feels that the memory is a little far away.

Perhaps it was because everything went surprisingly smoothly at that time that it did not leave a deep and indelible impression on him.Just like the elder brother of an ordinary family who took away his own younger brother from others, no one expressed any objection.

When Xie Yuming saw Xie Xilei, he didn't react or show any expression, as if he was facing a stranger, but if he was asked to follow Xie Xilei, he obediently followed.

He was unusual that morning. He went to the amusement park the day before, played and made trouble, laughed and cried, but this day he was very quiet, silently following behind Li Qian, watching him make breakfast, and watching Follow him to work in the study.Usually, Xie Yuming was diligently doing housework at these times, and would fly over from time to time to coquettishly beg him for praise, but today he just stared blankly at Li Qian, didn't speak much, with a dull expression and slow response.

After lunch, Xie Xilei came at the agreed time.Because he thought it would take a lot of effort, even the hemp rope was ready, but when Li Qian asked Xie Yuming to follow him home, Xie Yuming just hugged him in silence for a long time, and was pulled down obediently by him, and he followed him obediently left by himself.Xie Xilei was very surprised.

He was not crying, nor was he mad.Probably it has improved a lot in the past three months, anyway, it is not as described, much less like the old Xie Yuming.

Li Qian watched him leave, only to realize that his back was very tall and straight. Apart from being a little thinner, there was nothing abnormal about him. Even his steps were firm and powerful. Appears to be at a disadvantage.

In fact, Xie Xilan also came, but she couldn't bear to face her second brother. She waited until Xie Xilei took Xie Yuming into the car before getting off, and expressed her thanks to Li Qian again and again.Li Qian felt ashamed of receiving it, and seeing her eyes were still red from crying, she didn't know what to say.It was the first time that the atmosphere between the two of them was so stiff, each of them had nothing to say, and after a hasty goodbye, the car drove away and disappeared from Li Qian's sight.

He exhaled a sigh of relief, and let this matter go.

Li Qian thought that the matter of Xie Yuming had come to an end here. The laughter and throbbing, joy and friction during this period of time did exist and had indeed become a thing of the past.However, the truth is far from simple as he thought.

About half a month ago, he began to notice a beam of eyes following him—from going out to coming home, until he was blocked by the door again, the heat was so hot that it was about to burn two holes in his back, and it was like this every day.But every time he turned his head to look, he didn't catch any suspicious people.

At first, this gaze didn't have any real impact on him, but when he saw that he didn't take any action, it started to intensify. Even when Li Qian was at home, he could sometimes feel that he was being watched.

Li Qian intentionally wanted to catch him out, until on the eighth day when he purposely stared at the convex mirror at the corner and passed by, he finally caught the pervert who was following him every day.

Um?He knew this pervert—Xie Yuming?

His face darkened on the spot, and he stopped by the mirror, and when he saw Xie Yuming, he also stopped abruptly, and skillfully turned behind the wall on one side.He turned and stood patiently where he was, waiting for the mouse to come out of the hole.Sure enough, after a while, a head poked out from there.Seeing Li Qian still standing there, the little mouse turned pale, turned around and ran away.

Li Qian involuntarily raised the corners of his mouth, and felt a little annoyed when he realized it, so he suppressed it, let out a "chi" and turned his head away.

That annoying sight hasn't reappeared since three days.But on the fourth day, Li Qian "ran into" Xie Yuming while shopping for vegetables—this could be regarded as the first official meeting between the two after he was taken away by Xie Xilei.

The man was wearing a neat suit, but he was carrying a bag of tomatoes—Li Qian doubted very much that he brought them from home—the man greeted him with a calm smile. Xie Yuming also had a rare elegant and noble posture, as if he was carrying a gift bag worth tens of thousands in his hand, instead of a few cheap, unripe tomatoes.

At this time, there were no traces of the two years of madness in him. In just one month, those absurd and humiliating past seemed to have disappeared in his body, without a trace.

Li Qian didn't feel puzzled or unbelievable. He had been mentally prepared since the day he went to the amusement park, but he secretly couldn't believe it, and he deliberately condoned it and didn't pursue it.

He ignored Xie Yuming and walked past him without looking sideways.

Xie Yuming: Try to keep smiling :)

Every time there is a second time, Li Qian ran into Xie Yuming again in the supermarket two days later.This time he changed out of his suit, and although he changed into casual and comfortable clothes, his tall and perfect figure still made him stand out.

Xie Yuming pushed the shopping cart that was piled up with things indiscriminately, and when he saw him, he chased after him. "Qian!" His tone was more eager than last time, but not as ignorant as it was a month ago.

Li Qian knew that he was no longer the little crying bunny who let him rub him, treated him as everything, and cried for a hug. Although he didn't show any expression on his face, he felt nostalgic and relieved in his heart.

The road next to the freezer was narrow enough for two people to walk side by side with shopping carts, so Xie Yuming could only follow behind him.He could have left the car and ran over to find him, but he felt that the intention was too obvious.If he really wanted to tear off the superficial camouflage, I'm afraid that Li Qian would not even look at him, so he could only pretend to be a random encounter with a cheeky face when both parties knew it well.

It's a pity that Li Qian didn't want to catch up with him, so he picked up a bottle of milk and put it in the car, turned a corner, and went to pay the bill.

Xie Yuming wanted to catch up, but someone took the opportunity and stood behind Li Qian.Knowing that entanglement in public would be disgusting to him now, he could only look at his back in embarrassment through a person, holding the handle of the cart in his hand, and slowly exerting strength, showing his white joints.

Xie Yuming: I’m so angry, keep working hard next time

Li Qian expected that with his temper, after being thrown in the face twice like this, he probably wouldn't make fun of himself again.But never expected that after Xie Yuming suffered a serious illness, his face was worn down a lot, and he would not rest for a day, and then he came to create a third encounter with him.

As soon as Li Qian opened the door, she saw him standing in front of her door, smiling charmingly with thin lips.

"What a coincidence, Qian—"

What a coincidence, even blatantly guarding the door of the house, and still say such shameless words.

Li Qian slammed the door shut in front of him, and the sound came abruptly.

Xie Yuming: Qianqian still ignores me QAQ

Li Qian didn't walk away, but for some reason, he quietly listened to the movement outside the door, and after a while, something leaned against the door, following the sound of sliding.

He looked through the cat's eyes, Xie Yuming was sitting just like when he ran out of the mental hospital to guard his door, but last time his posture was curled up, looking extremely insecure, but this time his legs were stretched forward. , bent his knees slightly, wanton and decadent.

He slowly took out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket, lit it, put it to his lips and took a deep breath, exhaling a long string of white smoke.

When he was about to take a second puff, he paused for a moment, and put it down again when he touched the cigarette butt next to his lips, letting the cigarette burn by itself for a long time.Then to Li Qian's surprise, the man spread his left hand, revealing the palm full of scars, held the burning cigarette butt and pressed it down hard.

He twitched in pain, raised his head slightly, and suppressed the nerve reflex to withdraw his hand.Li Qian's clenched hand also twitched violently, almost opening the door in front of him.

But he didn't after all.

He didn't lose his temper with Xie Yuming, and he didn't deny that the two of them had been unavoidably close in the past three months.But even though his heart was jumping and rejoicing at the touch, his reason still dutifully reminded that Xie Yuming was not suitable for him—they may have love between them, but it is difficult to be a lifelong partner for each other.

They used to be separated by a huge class difference; after three years of different circumstances, if it wasn't for Xie Xilei's request, I'm afraid they would never see each other again; now, there is still a three-month gap between the two Li Qian has seen Xie Yuming's most embarrassing and humiliating appearance. He can ignore it for a while, but with his temperament, can he never care about it?

Xie Yuming's arrogance was hard to break, and for some reason he developed a temperament of vindictiveness.For those who have seen him miserable, he will not stop until he sees that the other person is worse than himself.It may have been an accident for Li Qian, but he would always inadvertently think of the shame and embarrassment of those three months, like a seed in his heart, which took root and sprouted bit by bit, and finally broke out completely.

Feelings may be a temporary lubricant, but if you want to accompany each other for a lifetime, there is only love, which is very difficult.Long-term pain is worse than short-term pain, he already understood the truth, so why would he try it so easily.

Li Qian really knew Xie Yuming very well, but it was just him three years ago.

If he could let Li Qian go, he wouldn't be crazy.

Xie Yuming does not deny that the darkest and ugliest part of his personality is an incidental product of his growth, such as a gangrene attached to the bone, which cannot be removed by cutting the skin and scraping the bone.Giving up some things—even things he likes very much—for Xie Yuming, the more times he does, the more numb he becomes.If Li Qian is insignificant to him, he may choose to push people into the abyss, but he is clearly different.Some people say that Li Qian is the softest part of his heart, but Xie Yuming himself understands that Li Qian is his heart, so he would rather endure the pain of skin and bone than lose his heart.

The chest was so empty that there was only a big bleeding hole left, and the feeling that even the blood dried up in the end, he had tasted it for three years, and now he couldn't bear it even for a day.

For Li Qian, he is willing to tear off that layer of arrogant mask, fully show himself who is going forward to pursue what he wants in his heart, and put all the softness in front of him, no matter how much he wants to trample on it, he will have nothing to do. Complaints; as long as Li Qian wants him, even such a change will make him drip with blood, and he is willing.

A's honey, B's arsenic|cream, something that Li Qian is unwilling and afraid to taste, but to Xie Yuming, it is a sweet treat.After all, it's just a deeper love.

Li Qian watched quietly until his eyes were a little sore, Xie Yuming finally got up slowly, and left his door with scars all over his body.