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"Parent's Short Story"

—— Lin Jingyan & Fang Rui

Lin Jingyan took a shower and came out of the bathroom. Fang Rui was still sitting on the carpet with his legs crossed and packing his things.

"It's getting late, let's go to bed." Lin Jingyan walked over and sat on the sofa, and found Fang Rui was holding a dozen A4 printing paper with something densely written on it, "What are you doing?"

"I'm so dirty... nervous." Fang Rui was so nervous that he couldn't speak, "Bah, bah, bah! I'm not nervous..."

"As for that?" Lin Jingyan was amused, "What are you looking at? How does a son-in-law come to please his mother-in-law scientifically...the top-secret strategy for a sweet-mouthed son-in-law to attract others...how to technically occupy the high ground of the mother-in-law's heart...you..."

Lin Jingyan fell into a state of speechlessness again.

Fang Rui tapped the bound booklet with a pen, solemnly: "This thing is the same as a game guide, to be honest, I think you can get rid of your parents scientifically by doing a good guide, and I found a scientific guide The method is to attack your mother first, after all, she thinks your cousin is a good match for me."

"No need to do this, really no need to do this."

"No, you don't have to attack my mother!" Fang Rui refused to accept it, and was even a little jealous. The relationship between his mother and Lin Jingyan was not too good. Fang's mother suddenly picked up an eldest son for nothing. Lin Jingyan is still very filial, Fang Rui He was often too busy to touch the ground, but Lin Jingyan was very leisurely after becoming a teacher. He often went out shopping with Fang's mother. What made Fang Rui unbearable was that Lin Jingyan often came back from shopping with big bags and small bags. Fang Rui opened it and found that they were all clothes, hats, sunglasses, etc. that Fang's mother bought for Lin Jingyan. The cold icy rain slapped randomly on his face.

"Your real mother, no, it's your real mother." Fang Rui held Lin Jingyan's hand solemnly, with the expression of Baidicheng entrusting Gu.

Lin Jingyan couldn't laugh or cry.

"I'm going to turn myself into a serf and sing." Fang Rui whistled, "I planned it this way. Young Master Huang is on vacation tomorrow. I happen to have time. Let's go to your house. I'm going to buy vegetables and make some meals. Show off, why not?" So, isn't it very witty?"

"Let's rest at home tomorrow." Lin Jingyan patted Fang Rui's shoulder, "Didn't Young Master Huang go back to the set the day after tomorrow, and you still have to follow, just rest for one day, don't worry about it."

"No." Fang Rui clenched his fists, "I have to show off my skills quickly, otherwise I... this new learning will be forgotten if I don't show it off."

Fang Rui spoke firmly. He stood up and gathered up the papers all over the floor and the things he was going to bring tomorrow. He tapped on his slippers and went to the bathroom to take a shower. Lin Jingyan helped him put the rest of the things back where they were. Suddenly, he found a small box of burn ointment on the coffee table.

"Fang Rui," Lin Jingyan knocked on the bathroom door, "Fang Rui, where did you get burned?"

There was the sound of splashing water in the bathroom, and Fang Rui's voice was indifferent: "No, no—"

"Fang Rui, that burn ointment has expired." Lin Jingyan didn't change his face.

"Damn it!" The bathroom door slammed open, Fang Rui poked his head out with a towel wrapped around his wet head, "Damn it, will the wound be serious? It's okay, it's been washed away by the water—"

"Just kidding." Lin Jingyan calmly grabbed Fang Rui's hand, "Where is the burn? Let me see."

"The oil collapsed when I was cooking," Fang Rui didn't care too much, "I think your mother seems to have a problem with my inability to cook. After careful consideration, I think this skill still needs to be armed."

Fang Rui grew up being pampered, Fang's father is an intellectual, Fang's mother is an artist, Fang Rui grew up on a free-range basis, the typical ten fingers do not touch the spring water, not to mention cooking, cooking instant noodles skills are messed up Yes, Mother Fang said it well, what's the use of knowing how to cook, as long as you know how to eat.This theory has won Fang Rui's approval, so after living for more than 20 years, he has almost never been in the kitchen.

When I got out of the kitchen, I found that this fucking kitchen was like a battlefield, and it was much more difficult than playing a dungeon. Fang Rui was so flustered that he almost lost his limbs, not to mention being splashed with hot oil on the back of his hand. Get wonderful results.

Huang Shao gave Fang Rui's mapo tofu a negative score and said that this is a lesson of blood and tears, and his surname will not be Huang if he eats Fang Rui's dishes.

Fang Rui: "...isn't it delicious?"

Huang Shaotian looked at Fang Rui, and almost burst into tears, hugging his thighs and weeping bitterly: "Si Lang, you are so cruel, tell me, how much salt you put, how many salt sellers you killed, who are you doing this for?" Daiyan, tell me, tell me, do you think I'm too talkative and want to kill me, can you express it directly, why bother to frame this poor mapo tofu?"

Fang Rui: "...Yes, I want to kill you."

Huang Shaotian really wasn't lying at all, Fang Rui tasted it himself, and was instantly stunned beyond words and even drank two bottles of wahhaha mineral water.

Huang Shaotian passed by him holding instant noodles: "Wahhaha mineral water, water of youth, water of friendship, water of detoxification!"

Fang Rui: "..."

What a conscientious spokesperson, Bixin.

"It's fine," Fang Rui felt a little embarrassed. In the final analysis, he didn't pay attention, and the burn wasn't too serious. "It'll be fine after I wash it, and I'll make sure there will be no traces tomorrow."

"Come out and I'll paint it for you." Lin Jingyan frowned slightly.

"Yeah!" Fang Rui nodded, tossing his hair, splashing water on Lin Jingyan's face.

Before going to bed, Lin Jingyan applied a thick layer of burn ointment to Fang Rui. Fang Rui lay on the bed with his hands raised and didn't know where to put them. The two of them couldn't sleep and chat. Assenting, Fang Rui fell asleep while talking, and slammed his hand down, smashing the burn ointment on Lin Jingyan's face.

Lin Jingyan: "..."

Fang Rui is sleepy, can never wake up, and has the ability to fall asleep anytime, anywhere, and Huang Shaotian is carved out of the same mold in this regard, Huang Shaotian can hang Wia and fall asleep by the side of the earth pit, and he is also a member of the crew. It was a rare miracle that Fang Rui could fall asleep leaning on the shopping station with his head down, which surprised Lin Jingyan.

"Fang Rui, Fang Rui?" Lin Jingyan pushed Fang Rui with the ingredients in his hand, and Fang Rui slowly opened his eyes, looking like he had lost his memory.

"I didn't sleep well yesterday." Fang Rui wiped his face, "I'll go, I had a nightmare yesterday."

Lin Jingyan thought to himself, that is someone who snored loudly yesterday, hugged my arm and didn't let go, couldn't get away even if he wanted to go to the toilet...

"Okay, let's go." Lin Jingyan said.

"I want to sing about Shiro visiting his mother." Fang Rui said suddenly.

Lin Jingyan: "..."

Fang Rui swayed his pose, and he felt that his figure had come out.

Lin Jingyan: "Teacher Fang, Beijing opera is not worth it, let's go."

Mother Lin is a full-time housewife. She was picking vegetables when she opened the door. Seeing Fang Rui smiling like a sunflower, she couldn't help laughing. The excitement of the dawn of victory.

Genius first step!

With Father Lin not around, Fang Rui felt less restrained and tried to make himself look relaxed and natural. In fact, he was so nervous that his heart was about to jump out. He picked vegetables with Mama Lin. Every time Mama Lin said a word to him, Fang Rui has to use his eight-core processor to calculate the real intention at high speed, and then come out with a relatively perfect answer. At this moment, countless strategy cheats are reverberating and gushing in his mind...

"Rest today." Mother Lin said.

How should I answer?Fang Rui's mind made a crazy analysis, combining the context and connecting the context, is there any rhetoric in this sentence?No!What's the tone like?What appears to be a question is actually a statement!What is the intention behind it?Today is Thursday, why does Fang Rui rest?Fang Rui thought to himself, don't you think I can't support Lin Jingyan because of my serious work?But what I really do is a decent but abnormal job!Or does Mother Lin mean how can she rest today?Does it mean that I am not working hard, not motivated, not motivated?No, I am a man with a sunny heart!Does the third meaning mean that the focus is on resting "today" instead of "resting" today?Does mom mean to let us come and accompany her after we rest?It turns out that there is another deep meaning!

Fang Rui finally finished analyzing Mama Lin's five words plus a punctuation mark, and thought up an answer that would make the examiners of the college entrance examination feel emotional, and then Mama Lin's topic skipped to the next one.

"How is Xiao Lin's stomach recently?" Mother Lin asked while peeling peas.

Fang Rui: "..."

Mother Lin was surprised: "What's wrong? He has a bad stomach again? Let him go home and stay for a while, and I'll take care of him—"

"No, no, no——" Fang Rui waved his hands quickly, "He has a pretty good stomach recently, don't let him come back, uh, I can take care of him."

Mother Lin didn't raise her eyelids: "You can't even take care of yourself."

Fang Rui: "..."

I'll go, what you said makes no sense.Fang Rui thought to himself, am I the one who can't take care of himself?I even took care of Huang Shaotian!Isn't Huang Shaotian human?

Huang Shaotian: Wang!

Mother Lin didn't start talking again. Fang Rui racked his brains for a while, and felt that he was like a student taking an exam. He memorized countless knowledge points before the exam. However, it was of no use. When the eyes are darkened, I don't know anything!Painful realization!

However, I am not a student who needs an answer sheet!I am studying Huangmei Opera!

Fang Rui had never revealed this matter to Lin's mother before. After all, for Fang Rui, it was nothing to show off, and it would only make people laugh. At least everyone Fang Rui knew had heard of him. I learned Huangmei opera and would point at him until I couldn't help laughing hahahaha at least eighteen.

Huang Shaotian was 36 at the time.

Is it a blessing or a curse? It's a disaster that can't be avoided, Fang Rui thought to himself, and then said to Mama Lin: "Auntie, do you listen to the opera?"

Mother Lin smiled: "Listen."

I go!That would be easy, Fang Rui vigorously peeled open a pea, and was about to promote himself, only to hear Mama Lin say, "I listen to Peking Opera."

Fang Rui: "...Auntie, do you want to listen to the Huangmei Opera?"

"Huangmei Opera is not good." Mother Lin said.

Fang Rui, died.

Fang Rui was very nervous during the meal. After all, he cooked one of the eight dishes on the table. Lin Jingyan even put Fang Rui's mapo tofu in front of Mama Lin, and specifically mentioned that Fang Rui made it. , but Mother Lin was expressionless and didn't respond at all.

Fang Rui had already lost the courage to be nervous, and he couldn't help but fell into the state of smashing pots and jars. Today's dishes are all delicious, so let's open up and eat, Fang Rui thought, I feel that I will never have the opportunity to come to Lin's for dinner again Yes, woo woo woo.

Fang Rui ate half a pig's trotter, [-] chicken wings, [-] chicken drumstick, and a large piece of braised pork, with the mentality of eating as much as he could for the last farewell meal before he died, like a typhoon passing through, Sweeping the dining table, Mama Lin looked at him differently after eating.

"Xiao Lin," Lin's mother knocked on Lin Jingyan's rice bowl in dissatisfaction, "Xiao Fang can't cook, don't you usually give him good food, why is he so hungry?"

Lin Jingyan pushed his glasses while laughing, and put the last chicken wing on the plate to Fang Rui: "Yes, yes, it's my fault."

Fang Rui continued to eat, and Lin's mother continued to talk, unconsciously with the intention of blaming Lin Jingyan, anyway, they kept saying for a long time that it was how you could starve Xiao Fang.

Xiao Fang was so excited that tears flowed down his face, and he thought it was really strange, did he have to sell miserably to get out? paw.

This should be the best time for Fang Rui to be treated at the Lin family. Because Fang Rui performed at the dining table what is called a starving ghost to send him a big meal in his previous life, Mama Lin felt that Fang Rui was treated very well at home. Poor, the desserts after dinner were all over the table, Lin Jingyan was almost speechless at the end of the meal, so he stopped Fang Rui and told him not to eat.

Fang Rui looked at Lin Jingyan with tears in his eyes: "Every time I come to your house, I can't get enough to eat, anyway, I won't come again, let me eat enough."

Lin Jingyan's heart softened all of a sudden. Fang Rui often went to Lin's house, but they broke up every time. Whether Fang Rui was acting cute, obedient, or filial, the Lin family's parents didn't buy it. Fang Rui ate every meal well. He was worried and didn't dare to pick up dishes that were too far away from him. Once he ate a whole plate of edamame and got diarrhea when he got home.

Mama Lin went to the kitchen to cut oranges, and when she turned around, she heard Fang Rui say that she would never come again, she was puzzled for a while.

"Why can't you come?" Mother Lin asked.

Fang Rui looked at Mama Lin pitifully: "I don't think you will let me in next time."

This straight ball was hit so suddenly and fell from the sky, Lin Jingyan was speechless and didn't know what to say.

"Oh." Mother Lin said, "Next time you can come if you are hungry, but you can't come if you are full."

Fang Rui: "???"

"There are always piles of vegetables at home, so it's good to eat more." Lin's mother stood up and turned her back to the two of them, "Hey, Xiao Lin has a bad stomach, and you don't know how to cook. Eat so much again, can you two really eat well at home?"

Fang Rui looked at Lin Jingyan: "What does this mean?"

Lin Jingyan said: "Maybe it means you can still come?"

"Oh my god!" Fang Rui slapped his thigh, just as Mama Lin turned her head.

"Ok?"

"Mom." Fang Rui's mouth was sweet, and he continued with an exclamation. His eyes were sincere and his expression was sincere. Holding an orange in his hand, he looked at Mama Lin very seriously and called out "Mom" with real affection.

"Huh?" Mama Lin didn't realize it at first, but then she realized that Fang Rui was calling her, and she hummed without retorting.

"Mom!" Fang Rui took a step forward, jumped up and down, and rushed to Mama Lin's side, as if honey had been smeared on his mouth, it was so sweet, and just a few words made Mama Lin laugh out loud.

This is not yesterday's sharpen the gun, this is Fang Rui's innate skill, the mouth is sweet, the killer of middle-aged and elderly women, once the real self's aura is fully opened, it will really have at least 10 plus signs in every sentence, so sweet I went in my heart.

Although Lin's mother was stubborn, she couldn't hold back Fang Rui's ability to sharpen her eighteen martial arts skills. Finally, she was about to touch the route of selling misery and the route of sweet talk. She succeeded in the strategy, and the two got together to whisper, leaving Lin Jingyan alone to face the crowd The tableware waiting to be cleared looked at each other.

"Xiao Lin, wash the dishes." Mother Lin said, "Xiao Fang, come here, let me tell you—"

Lin Jingyan: "..."

Mother, whose mother is it?Lin Jingyan fell into deep thinking. Fang Rui's strategy is nothing if not done. If he does a strategy, his status as a real son will be challenged and impacted.Thinking of this, Lin Jingyan decided to call Fang's mother to complain.

Mother Fang was shopping again. When she answered the phone, her voice was very happy. When she heard that it was Lin Jingyan, she was so happy that her voice floated up: "Xiao Lin, I saw a really nice shirt when I was shopping. I will buy it for you. A 175 wears—"

Fang Rui stood behind Lin Jingyan like a ghost, Lin Jingyan glanced at him, and then said hypocritically to Fang Rui's mother, "Don't you want to buy one for Fang Rui?"

Mother Fang continued to say happily: "What can I buy for him? For you, he, he doesn't look good in clothes."

Fang Rui's teeth were almost crushed.

"Thank you mom." Lin Jingyan said.

Fang Rui: "Mom—"

Mother Fang heard Fang Rui's voice: "Oh, Fang Rui, Fang Rui, you bastard, are you here?"

Fang Rui: "...Yes, mother, mother, I am here."

"I can't remember clearly," Fang's mother said, "Fang Rui, does Xiao Lin have a red bow tie?"

Fang Rui gritted his teeth, and the words came out from between his teeth: "Mom, I don't know."

Lin Jingyan smiled secretly, and put his arms around Fang Rui's shoulders: "Hey mom, yes, I have one, the one you saw last time, the last time we went water skiing."

Fang Rui: "Damn it, when did you guys go water skiing???"

"Fang Rui, you bastard is swearing again," Fang's mother began to educate, and then her tone softened when she spoke to Lin Jingyan, "Xiao Lin, I think this shirt will look good with that red tie, I bought it , come out for afternoon tea tomorrow and bring it to you."

Fang Rui: "...I want to be quiet."

Fang Rui expressed his anger profoundly. On Weibo, at least 140 of the 120 characters are exclamation points. By the way, give Fang Rui some wax.

Nima!Fang Rui felt heartbroken, and most importantly, he felt the danger of being abandoned, why did he become like this now!Simply incomprehensible!My own mother was captured, and I just captured Lao Lin's mother, and I am still in the process of getting closer, and in this process!He was given to NTR by Lin Jingyan!This is unbearable!

Fang Rui scrolled through Weibo, and suddenly a repost of someone he followed popped up. When he clicked on it, it turned out to be Lin Jingyan.

@林景言V: Ten miles of spring breeze is not as good as you. //@Looking at my sincere eyes and speaking: I will go to the heavens and the heavens will not tolerate anyone's mother, I have no one to ask for it! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Fang Rui's heart warmed, and he thought that Lao Lin was still good to me. However, this Weibo disappeared as soon as it was refreshed, and another Weibo popped up, which was forwarded by Lin Jingyan. He deleted the sentence just now and replaced it with He wrote a poem that was more in line with Fang Rui's current state of mind.

@林景言V: The scent of vinegar is not as good as you. //@Looking at my sincere eyes and speaking: I will go to the heavens and the heavens will not tolerate anyone's mother, I have no one to ask for it! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Fang Rui: "Ahhh, are you annoying? If you say you are annoying, don't you have anything else to say to me—"

Lin Jingyan turned sideways and hugged him: "Yes, I love you."

End.