I am not human

Chapter 67 Cannibalism

"Don't be afraid, calm down and take a deep breath. Come on, remember it well, and remember what you should be like."

The voice beside the ear was hoarse and gentle, like a spell or a guide.Liao Qingshu's closed eyelids trembled slightly, her hands unconsciously grasped her clothes, and the voice overflowing from her mouth was like a dream.

"It should... look like?"

"Yes, it is you in other people's eyes. Recall everything, how others see you, what they want to see you. What you have to do now is to try your best to return to that state." Qiao Xiren continued said guidingly.

Usually, the self in the eyes of others.

Liao Qingshu, who is gentle, polite, and not good at rejecting.

It's just "the way it should be", not "the way it should be".Rather, the appearance of oneself is now closer to the so-called "authentic" - and this appearance is precisely not accepted.

"If you want to live in that group, you have to live like them first. Imagine that you have a skin, and now you just get that skin back. What is that skin like? How about it? Remember it all, draw it in your mind, and put it on your body. Come on, try again.”

Pi——Liao Qingshu's eyelashes trembled again.

Skin.

camouflage.

box.

Unclear thoughts walked wishfully, and gradually walked out of their own way in the weeds.Oh, that's right, I see.

Put on the disguise again.In other words, you can just stuff yourself into the box again.

Liao Qingshu began to imagine himself drilling into another box, desperately drilling, curling up his body, and stuffing his whole body into that dark and cramped box, his joints were twisted and making painful sounds, but his heart was only filled with morbid ecstasy ——In it all, stuff it all in, cover the box firmly, and no one will see you again.

As if watching from another person's perspective, Liao Qingshu looked at herself like an earthworm and kept digging in and out until her skin rubbed against the rough surface inside the box.Then, he saw himself turning around with difficulty, reaching out to close the lid of the box——

It was the doorknob that came across.

The yellow old-fashioned wooden door has a red inverted blessing, and graffiti is randomly drawn with crayons on the bottom.

There was an indistinct voice from inside the door, which couldn't be heard clearly, but it made one's whole heart tremble.

At some point, the perspective switched from the bystander to the first perspective. Liao Qingshu looked at her hand helplessly, holding the doorknob like a soldering iron, trying to break free but couldn't let go.

Do you want to drive?Still can't open it?

Where is he?Inside or outside the door, inside or outside the box?

Liao Qingshu's mind was confused again.The weeds were growing upwards, covering the path he had finally found. He looked around in a daze, seeing a wooden door and darkness in front of him, making it hard for him to tell where he was.

In a panic, he pushed the wooden door out.It wasn't until the door leaf moved that he realized that the weird door had turned back into a box lid at some point, and he pushed it out forcefully, revealing a gap.

"...Shu."

Ok?

"Liao Qingshu!" A voice exploded in his ears like thunder, and Liao Qingshu opened his eyes in shock, just in time to see Qiao Xiren wiping his sweat with a tissue: "Huh, it can be regarded as being called back."

"???" Liao Qingshu looked around ignorantly, and found herself sitting in a strange living room.His clothes were torn and dirty, and he looked very embarrassed. His whole body was aching violently, as if his bones had been pulled out and stuffed back, and he was also injected with lactic acid.

Before, due to the impact of demonization, his sanity became a little blurred, and after being picked up by Qiao Xiren in the car, he was completely fragmented. He had no memory of how he was brought back to Qiao's residence, and his current mood was almost like a hangover After waking up, I found that my body was lying on someone else's bed, just like the ups and downs.But if he really wanted to say it, Liao Qingshu would rather be fruitful - because he found that his shoes and dirty clothes had stained other people's floors and leather sofas.

"Hey, it's okay, you sit down, you can sit down." Seeing that Liao Qingshu wanted to stand up in embarrassment, Qiao Xiren quickly pushed him back—his palms were generous and warm, but they were so strong that he almost knocked Liao Qingshu down. Reimbursement on the spot.

"It's really okay." The current chief exorcist waved his hands generously, "Just mop the floor, and replace the sofa. It's worth tens of thousands of yuan, it doesn't matter!"

"..." Liao Qingshu felt her buttocks trembling, and silently moved forward, only daring to sit on one side.

Qiao Xiren turned around to get the mop, and found a change of clothes for Liao Qingshu and handed it over: "It's uncomfortable, right? Come on, take a hot bath first, and then have a good sleep. It won't be uncomfortable after two days of rest. Remember how much Drink hot water, how about I pour you a cup now?"

The tone was concerned and normal, as if what Liao Qingshu had just experienced was not a terrible demonization, but just a cold and a cold.Liao Qingshu took the clothes dully, stared blankly at Qiao Xiren for a long time, and finally said in a low voice, "Well, uh, thank you, thank you Teacher Qiao."

"It's okay. Let me tell you, don't think too much about it, just treat it as an illness, pass it, don't keep thinking about it... Hey, what's wrong with you?"

Qiao Xiren handed over a box of tissues in a panic, Liao Qingshu was taken aback for a moment, then touched his face, only to realize that he was crying in disappointment.

Liao Qingshu hastily pulled out a tissue and wiped it carelessly.Qiao Xiren sighed, put the tissue box beside Liao Qingshu, knelt down on one knee, looked at Liao Qingshu and said, "You're scared, aren't you?"

Liao Qingshu nodded hesitantly.Qiao Xiren reached out and stroked his hair, and said, "I know it's hard for you to accept, but don't be afraid, really don't be afraid. Those students in the non-segregated class will learn how to demonize when they are freshmen. It doesn't matter, what they can do we can do."

Liao Qingshu reluctantly hooked the corners of her mouth: "When I was a freshman, I was studying advanced mathematics and Ma Zhe."

"Special treatment for the isolation class. Cherish it, my colleagues in the exorcism department don't even know that Marx is Russian, and they will be despised by others if they go out."

"Actually... he's German."

Qiao Xiren was slightly taken aback, then scratched his eyebrows in embarrassment: "Look, what did I say?"

Liao Qingshu was amused by a smile, but that smile disappeared so quickly that Qiao Xiren only had time to catch a twitch of a facial muscle.He handed another tissue to Liao Qingshu, thought for a while and asked, "Can you tell me, what is it all for?"

Liao Qingshu: "Huh?"

"No one will demonize for no reason, especially the isolation class that learns how to restrain oneself since childhood. Only under the influence of strong inspiration or emotions, we will make some...bad behavior. So, do you mind telling me Me, what is the reason why you became a demon?"

Liao Qingshu lowered his head, and said after a long time: "Jiufang gave me that PHS..." He observed Qiao Xiren's expression, and said firmly, "As expected, Mr. Qiao, you already knew about it."

Qiao Xiren scratched his face: "Actually, it was Zhe Yi who discovered it at first. He picked up the mobile phone you left in my car. I didn't want to hide it from you, but I just thought I should tell you at a suitable time."

"Is there a difference if you say it sooner or later? Whether you say it or not, it is a fact that Jiufang Ziyan wants to kill me, and this will not change." Liao Qingshu unconsciously rubbed the tissue with her fingers, her eyes tilted to one side, "I always thought We're friends."

"That's what you think. He may not think so. It's okay, just get used to it."

Qiao Xiren still maintained the posture of kneeling in front of Liao Qingshu on one knee, and gently put his hand on his knee: "We who flow with the blood of evil beasts are destined to have nowhere to go. We are neither humans nor monsters. Demons, but even half-monsters are unwilling to accept us—who do you think we can get mercy from like this?"

"The only thing we can have and understand each other as companions is each other as the same kind, isn't it?"

Liao Qingshu moved his eyes slowly, his eyes sank into Qiao Xiren's gray eyes, and then he lowered his eyes in a flash: "It's not practical, I can't live in such a small world. And I stayed here just to be surrounded by this half-demon group." acceptance, I want to prove that I am the same as them..."

"The question is, do you really know who you are, my kind?" Qiao Xiren twitched the corners of his mouth, patted Liao Qingshu's knee lightly, and said in a low and hoarse voice, "You can't find yourself in the crowd, because You have already become what they are. This is the saddest fact, but it is also the only way we live now."

"Hide your real self from them. Put on a good skin, put on good makeup. Smile as if you are not happy or angry, and keep silent as if you have nothing to say. Pretend to be an actor and use the most Appropriate posture to deal with everything, this is what they want to see, only in this way, they will agree with you. But it is only recognition, for them, we are still bombs, we do not deserve any extravagant understanding, but this kind of Things, you can’t be too demanding, right.”

"...Is this how you became the chief?" Liao Qingshu looked up at him, "Like an actor, acting all the way up? Isn't it uncomfortable?"

Qiao Xiren nodded: "Once you get used to it, you will get twice the result with half the effort."

"Aren't you tired?"

"I told you that it was a tragedy when I joined the Exorcism Department. You can't ask too much for the continuation of the tragedy." Qiao Xiren stood up and shrugged, then turned around and poured a cup of hot water for Liao Qingshu, "If you are interested, listen to it." ? Just adjust your mood."

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