Fairy takeaway
Chapter 87
When he Nuo found the little boss, he was catching butterflies to play.
In midsummer, the valley is full of flowers, and the mountains and plains are full of white tongue asters, ageratum and dandelions.Butterflies come to the flowers in groups to feed on honey, white, yellow, black, flying around, tireless.The color of the tiger swallowtail is bright and majestic, with distinct lines; the blue swallowtail seems to be black all over, unadorned, but the wing veins are covered with a layer of golden phosphorous powder particles, refracting the sun, and emitting dazzling spots like stars; There is also Nongdie, which looks more ordinary and looks like a moth. It is small and has big eyes. This kind of butterfly seems to be jumping at high speed when it flies.They should be the first batch of adults to emerge this year, and they need to hurry up and eat to prepare for the next egg-laying and breeding season.
Luo Xiang is obviously very good at catching butterflies, he doesn't even need to look, he just stretches out his hand based on feeling, palms together, his movements seem random, but he succeeds every time.And he also likes to challenge butterflies that are more difficult to catch.Like the Ribbon Swallowtail, although it is a fairy-looking Liang Zhudie, but because of its slow flying speed, it is easy to get it, and there is no sense of accomplishment at all.
As for the Ascension to Heaven Sword and Swallow Butterfly, it is as light as a bird, fleeting, and can almost fly straight up in an instant. It is extremely difficult to catch with bare hands, and it is Luo Xiang's favorite prey.Every time he catches it, he has to hold the little butterfly in his palm and handle it, then let it go, catch it again, let it go again, and repeat this many times.
The little sea otter suddenly felt a little speechless, and he stopped playing such a boring little game after graduating from kindergarten.The little boss' hobbies are really peculiar.
Taking advantage of Luo Xian's fluttering of butterflies, Ta Nuo cautiously threw himself on his back, barking a few words softly.
Luo Xian happily released the butterfly in his palm, and turned to look at the little sea otter.He promised to swear that he could see a sense of excitement in the eyes of the little boss that "there is finally a more fun toy".
No, no, it must be an illusion.
The little sea otter shook his head, throwing out those strange thoughts.He eagerly grabbed Luo Xian's arm with his paws, wanting to tell the other party about the accident of the human delivery man, but he couldn't speak, so he scratched his ears with his paws anxiously.
"Don't move." Luo Xiang frowned, broke off the little sea otter's flailing paw with his hand, and said, "You lost your ear in a while, but no one will mend it for you."
How could the ear fall off?The little sea otter really doesn't understand the brain circuit of the little boss.
Finally, Luo Xiang took out his mobile phone, called up the text, and asked Little Sea Otter to type instructions.It's not easy to type with fleshy claws.He promised to use all four claws, and finally sacrificed his own nose. After a lot of effort, he finally typed a nonsense sentence:
I made a mistake.
Luo Xie looked at him with a smile, and didn't remind him that Nuo can completely change back into a human form and type.
"Oh." He replied indifferently, and pushed the phone to the little sea otter again, "Continue."
Resigned to his fate, the little sea otter struggled to finish a paragraph with his nose, gesturing and rolling, and finally explained clearly the big crisis that the human takeaway boy strayed into the louver forest and is still hanging on the tree.
He raised his head and looked at Luo Xiang eagerly.
Luo Xiang nodded, calmly expressing that he understood.
He promised to rest assured that the little boss said that he must have a solution to the problem.
Sure enough, Luo Xiang readily agreed to help.The little sea otter grabbed him with its paws and enthusiastically led him to the tree where the human was placed last night.Unexpectedly, when I arrived at the place, I found that the golden eagle brother, the second otter brother and Mr. Boa Constrictor had all come, and it was very lively.
And the human takeaway boy has been sent back to the ground at this time, wrapped in a layer of tattered banana leaves, with a smirk on his face, talking nonsense over and over again.Seeing a little sea otter leading a person walking towards him, he wasn't even afraid, and even smiled silly at him.
Originally, the little sea otter was terrified when he was spotted by the human delivery boy.He subconsciously hid behind Luo Xiang, grabbed his leg, tilted his head and peeked quietly.Unexpectedly, he met the rather helpless eyes of Mr. Boa Constrictor.
Mr. Boa constrictor waved at the little sea otter, and said loudly: "Don't hide, come out, it doesn't matter anymore."
The little sea otter looked at Mr. Boa Constrictor curiously.
Mr. Boa Constrictor explained that he was at the party last night. He originally wanted to look around for a strong man who could help erase human memory. He happened to meet an enthusiastic drunk and was grabbed by the other party and forced to drink a glass of berry wine. .His drinking capacity was extremely poor, and he was drunk immediately after drinking.He wanted to go home in a daze, but he accidentally stepped on the ground and rolled to the edge of a small stream, where he turned into his original shape and fell asleep coiled up until the sun was up.After waking up from the wine, Mr. Boa Constrictor felt that something was wrong, so he hurried back, only to meet the big golden eagle who was at a loss.
Brother Otter nodded, saying that his experience was similar.He didn't pay much attention to this matter in the first place. After he came back last night, he was directly pulled by the mother otter to do the aftermath of the party. He was busy until dawn, and he had completely forgotten about him. He only remembered it at noon today.
Brother Jindiao continued what Mr. Boa Constrictor had said, with a rather helpless tone. "I came to inspect the field this morning. The party last night was too crazy, and I was worried about leaving hidden dangers. I flew around, woke up a few people who were still hungover, and flew high into the sky again, and found him." He pointed to the delivery boy.The human brother was oblivious to the discussions around him, and was still giggling.
"I saw him hanging in mid-air, wailing loudly, crying and laughing, and thought that someone was still playing drunk, so I flew over and said a few words to him."
At that time, Brother Jindiao used the original form.
Speaking of this, Brother Jin Diao couldn't help but sighed.It is also because he has lived in the human world for too long, and he is no longer as sensitive to the difference between human spirits as before.In addition, the river bend area is not in the depths of the venetian forest, and no human beings have ever set foot in it before.He subconsciously thought that the person hanging on the tree was just a spirit who had turned into a human, so he went up to talk to him without even thinking about it, thus creating a predicament that frightened people stupid.
It is conceivable that the human delivery man was terrified all night, and suddenly saw a big bird speak human words to him, what a terrifying scene it was.He was frightened and fainted immediately, and when he woke up again, he became what he is now.If you say he is crazy, it doesn't seem like he is. Just now he was talking to Brother Jindiao and the others, and it sounded clear and logical, not crazy.That’s what he said, it sounds a little weird, I don’t know if there is any human allusion.
After hearing this, the little sea otter couldn't help but nodded.No wonder Big Brother Boa said it was okay.Now that the human takeaway brother has already seen the talking golden eagle brother, a little sea otter that can walk upright seems nothing special.He let go of the paws that had been holding on to Luo Xiang, walked slowly to the delivery guy, bent over and looked at him curiously.
At this moment, the human delivery boy suddenly shook his head, looking quite confused.He looked at the little sea otter and asked, "Are you also from Journey to the West?"
What?What Journey to the West?
The little sea otter frowned, and looked at the golden eagle and the others begging for help.
Brother Jin Diao shook his head and said, "I don't know what he's talking about either. When he woke up and saw me, he also said that I was from Journey to the West."
It seems that this human takeaway boy not only accepted his experience well after waking up, but also developed his own understanding system with a big brain.
As the bodyguard of the former domineering president, Brother Golden Eagle already has a lot of human knowledge, and he can live among humans for a long time without being noticed.However, there are more than thousands of human knowledge, and there are so many kinds of knowledge, most of the ghosts can only learn a little in their lifetime.Miscellaneous notes of gods and monsters like Journey to the West are in the knowledge blind spot of Big Brother Golden Eagle.
Mr. Boa, who is taking the postgraduate entrance examination, is more knowledgeable, and knows a little about the story of Journey to the West.It's just that he remembered that there was a monkey and a pig in Journey to the West. When did a golden eagle appear again?
The human takeaway guy slapped his thigh, hating iron for nothing, and said loudly, "It's the golden-winged roc eagle! It's in Journey to the West, because he wanted to eat the meat of Tang monk, he was finally captured by the Buddha."
He raised his finger, pointed hard at the golden eagle brother, and said with certainty: "Isn't it him!"
Several ghosts looked at him blankly.
The human takeaway brother suddenly felt a sense of loneliness that no one appreciates. "So you ghosts and ghosts don't read Journey to the West?" He sighed. "I thought this kind of novel would be very popular among you. After all, Journey to the West is a documentary literature for you, right?"
The little sea otter couldn't understand, so he shook his head.
The human takeaway boy seemed to have been suddenly opened up to a strange chatterbox, and suddenly he talked more, bursting out, like a machine gun that didn't jam.
"Thinking about it, Wu Cheng'en is a human being after all, and there is racial segregation. Your description may not be objective enough. But it doesn't matter. If you have any opinions, you can raise them. I feel that the big guys who make TV dramas are still very willing to rewrite it. A version of Journey to the West. Do you know what IP is? Journey to the West is an IP! Looking at 5000 years, if you put all the novels in order, it can also stand in the front row. I really like to read it. By the way, among you Is there any descendant of Sun Dasheng... No, it should be called Houhou? Is there any? Call it out and let me see. I am a fan of Sun Dasheng, and I would like to meet the descendants of idols. I can pay to have sex with him shake hands."
Suddenly he rolled over like a carp and sat up straight, with a look of loneliness on his face. "Oh, no, do you accept RMB? I don't have Mingbi for the time being. I don't know when my family will remember to burn paper money for me. My short-sighted buddy probably didn't remember that I was missing. But you don’t need to feel sorry for me, I don’t have any great qualities, but I’m just very open-minded, easygoing and down-to-earth.” As he spoke, he became happy again, and patted his chest violently.
The little sea otter looked at Mr. Boa Constrictor and barked.
I think this human might still be crazy.He said so.
Unexpectedly, the human takeaway brother heard his voice, and yelled, "Oh my god, so you are a dog. I just thought you were a sea otter."
……
Wang Wang Wang!
I was originally a sea otter!
The human delivery boy looked at him strangely, and said in amazement, "It really looks like a sea otter. I have seen sea otters on Weibo. They can wash their faces and take a shower. They are so cute. I thought I went to the zoo to see and see, but I heard that there are no zoos in the city. But I guess you are not a sea otter. There are no sea otters in the zoo. How can you run outside? By the way, you can bark, so what kind of dog are you Huh? Looks like it's Teddy? Isn't it?"
Without saying a word, the little sea otter sat down on the ground with a snap, stretched out his two front paws, and rubbed his face vigorously, as if washing his face.
Unexpectedly, the human delivery guy didn’t look at him, and continued on his own, “Why can’t you talk? That bird can talk, and it sounds like an uncle’s voice that is very popular with little girls. Do you practice You can’t get it right. Do you have inner alchemy? When did you become a spirit? After the founding of the People’s Republic of China? Did your family know that you became a spirit? Are your parents also monsters?”
The little sea otter was so angry that his head ached, he turned his head and ran towards Luo Xiang, ignoring the nagging humans.
The human delivery boy was still behind him to persuade, "Little comrade, do you know that you have to be diligent to be a monster? You can't just rely on your cuteness to do whatever you want. Like our food deliveries, we also have to pay attention to KPIs. If you don't work hard, you can't do it. And it’s not just about the quantity of business, it’s also about getting your customers to like you and be willing to give you five-star praise. Be like me, hehe, although I don’t want to be too proud, but to be honest, there is one thing to say, in the food delivery business, generally speaking , I did a good job."
He shook his head, seeming a little embarrassed. "As for me, how do I describe it to you? It means that Wu Yanzu is a takeaway. By the way, do you know what Wu Yanzu is? You don't know. Come on, look at my face. If you look like me, it's called Wu Yanzu. Haven’t heard of it, maybe you’ve seen it for a long time. Hahaha!”
The little sea otter took Luo Xiang's hand and covered his ears.
"Wu Yanzu like me is also very popular among customers. This season, I got the most five-star praise in our team. Really, I admire myself. Of course, I also Not only relying on appearance, I also take the route of strength. Last month, I didn’t take a day off. For 30 days, I worked nine or ten hours a day, and I didn’t even ask for leave when I had a cold or low fever. I walked the street Chuanxiang, there is no order that I can't deliver!"
The topic of food delivery is an area of interest to the little sea otter.It turns out that this is how human delivery staff work.He was fascinated by what he heard, and suddenly felt that the whole image of this human takeaway boy had grown taller.
"However, I am also willing. Why, after all, I like to deliver food. I have also worked as a courier for a while before. I am not bragging about myself, I am also a courier, and I am also Tony Leung in the courier industry. It was very successful, and the salary was good. I quit later, feeling that the food still couldn’t live up to it.
Every day I give food to people, the places I come in and out are all fragrant and popular places, I enjoy it very much.I also like to eat it myself.If it's not for delicious food, why do people have to work so hard?Anyway, for some reason, I feel that everyone is pointing at me to eat, and this feeling is quite good.No matter when to send, they are looking forward to me.What does this mean?This shows that I am worthy of dinner, what an honor this is. "
The little sea otter nodded vigorously, feeling sorry for him.This sense of empathy made the status of the human takeaway brother suddenly elevated in his heart, almost as tall as a small sapling.
Talking and talking, I don't know what to think, the human takeaway brother became sad again.
"Let me just say, you can't be too good at being a person. Once someone as good as me is targeted, it's hard not to be loved. You see, this is going to hit a ghost, right?" He lowered his voice and said mysteriously , "I heard that this ghost also looks at people's dishes. People with ugly looks and low values generally don't get the same treatment as me."
Finally, Mr. Boa Constrictor couldn't bear to talk. "How are you treated?" he asked.
Probably after finally waiting for someone to flatter him, the human delivery boy spoke more vigorously. "When I was young, my mother took me to fortune-telling. She said that it was some kind of mother-in-law. After burning incense, she could go to the human body, and then pinch her fingers to tell the fortune. Of course, I didn't believe it at the time. Now I think it might be There is such a thing. If that mother-in-law is your colleague or something, please do say a few words for me. I was young and ignorant at that time, and those who don’t know are innocent.
Ah, it's far away, it's far away, in short, this is the mother-in-law. After the upper body, I asked someone to tell my mother that I will be rich and rich in the future... I guess it's out of the question, but I can still do it without worrying about food and clothing, and it's hit Have an adventure.Do the math when I was in my 20s.Am I in my 20s now? "
Mr. Boa constrictor spoke again, "What adventure are you having now?"
The human takeaway boy met his palms, clapped hard, pointed at Luo Xiang and said loudly, "Isn't the gorgeous ghost an adventure?"
……
Luo Xiang's face turned black.
The little sea otter covered his mouth with his paws, squinted his eyes, and snickered.
"I heard that encountering a ghost, in ancient times, was a high-level treatment that only scholars and talented people could have. Although I only have a technical secondary school diploma, I can enjoy the same treatment as an intellectual. Isn't it just an adventure? So, that What □□ mother-in-law calculated my fate, it is too accurate! My mother's incense money for so many years has not been wasted."
After finishing speaking, the human takeaway brother finally calmed down, lowered his head and didn't know what he was thinking, and suddenly started crying, saying that he was sorry for his mother, if he knew it earlier, he should be more filial to the elderly, and accompany her to burn incense and so on .
Several audience members had different expressions on their faces.
Luo Xiang raised his arm, raised the knife and dropped it... Ahem, he beat the cow across the mountain with a knife in his hand, and knocked out the human delivery boy neatly.Then a beam of white light flew out from his forehead, fell into Luo Xian's palm, and instantly dissipated into a cloud.
The little sea otter tiptoed, and pushed Luo Xiang's hand away probing.
woof woof?
Luo Xiang nodded and said affirmatively: "Well, he has already forgotten what happened after last night. It's nothing serious, just get some sleep, maybe these points will be a little silly."
Anyway, he himself is already stupid enough, and it is estimated that he is not bad for a few days.
In fact, Luo Xiang has a more gentle way to make people forget.It's just that this human takeaway boy was too noisy, and he touched Luo Xiang's minefield. He was impatient to do useless work, and directly knocked him out.
Luo Xiang also helped to erase the order traces and call records left by Mr. Boa Constrictor.So far, when the human takeaway brother wakes up, no one will remember the accident.
Both Tano and Mr. Boa constrictor breathed a sigh of relief.The guilty Mr. Boa took all the cash out of his body and handed it to the delivery guy.He Nuo also picked some out of his pocket money to make up the whole thing, and he secretly stuffed a few crispy dried shrimps in the delivery boy's pocket as comfort, which was the rations he had managed to leave behind.
"You send him back." Luo Xiang glanced at the golden eagle brother.The golden eagle's flying ability is most suitable for transporting goods.
The golden eagle brother agreed to go.
So far, things have finally been properly resolved.
From Little Sea Otter's point of view, this takeaway incident was just a very interesting little accident in his life, which was soon forgotten by him.
Let's say that the human takeaway boy fell asleep for another day after being sent back to his residence by the golden eagle brother, and then woke up slowly.Several buddies who are also delivery workers surrounded him to ask his health.
One muttered, "What's wrong with you, the phone can't be reached, and the door can't be opened. I'm so scared that I want to go to the traffic bureau to check the accident report."
Another said, "I didn't see you yesterday, so I just asked for leave for you. If you don't feel well, you can rest for two days before canceling the leave."
Facing the concerned friends, the takeaway boy was deeply moved.It's just that he couldn't tell what happened to him.He had no memory of yesterday at all.He seemed to have slept a long, long sleep, and had a strange dream.This feeling is very strange.Maybe it's really like what my friends said, he worked too hard last month to sit down and get sick, and his body was still weak so he couldn't wake up.
He decided not to delve into it any further. Anyway, his body feels good now, and there is no discomfort at all.Meet and go out with friends for a big meal.After eating a big meal and satisfying his appetite, the delivery guy once again habitually let his imagination run wild.
"You said, is it possible that I actually went out yesterday?"
Friends have already seen his ability to talk nonsense, and they just responded perfunctorily.
The takeaway guy sighed and said: "I just have such a feeling that I didn't just fall asleep yesterday. Although I don't know why I went there, I always suspect that I was slept by someone. "
puff--
A friend sprayed his neighbor in the face with a sip of beer.
The delivery boy continued to analyze seriously, "Otherwise, how can you explain why I have so much extra money?"
Isn't this the ironclad evidence that someone covets my beauty and intends to sleep with me?
Also, he put dried shrimp in my pocket.This kind of loving snack is not love, what is it?
When the delivery boy was changing his clothes before going out for dinner, he suddenly took out a stack of banknotes from his body, which scared him into a circle on the spot.After the popularity of mobile payment, he has not used banknotes for many years.As for the small handful of dried shrimp, it is even more psychedelic - although, the dried shrimp tastes pretty good, it is fragrant and crispy, the shrimp meat is very Q, and it tastes sweet.
The delivery boy couldn't help but smack his lips, reminiscing about the wonderful taste.
But ah, the netizens are all right. Now that the world is getting worse, it is very dangerous for boys to go out, let alone him Wu Yanzu.
I just don't know why the other party suddenly changed his mind.
The takeaway boy helped his waist and confirmed again that his butt didn't hurt.
Could it be that when I lost consciousness, I was actually opened up to Ren Du's second channel, and the small universe broke out in an instant, caught that miscreant and beat him up, and performed a full martial arts?Awesome, myself!
Friends looked at him like they were looking at a big fool.
The takeaway boy snorted, and decided not to share his experience with these ordinary people who have no detective ability.After drinking and eating, he bid farewell to his friends, returned to the rental house, used his mobile phone to record the fragments of his dreams and his well-founded analysis, and posted the content on the Internet.
The title is:
"I often look out of place with other delivery guys because of my beauty, and the things that [-] Yanguis love and hate me (also known as, the record of the handsome takeaway guy)"
Author: Takeaway Wu Liangshi
Personality signature: I am born with a useful face
After watching the melon-eating crowd, they all said, these days, do ghosts have to be male ghosts?Are you so willing to engage in sex?Since you are going to make it up like this, then...then you can be more specific, I still have traffic.
Not to mention, the style of the post is light and strange, the writing is lively and vivid, it was reposted, and the click-through rate is not bad.If you search the Internet now, you can still see the grand occasion where the melon-eaters strongly demanded the poster to explode photos after watching the excitement.
Among the countless booing voices, only one comment seemed different and out of place.
A Digital ID user whose profile picture is a smiling sea otter took a selfie left a message: You are thinking of peach! ! !
In midsummer, the valley is full of flowers, and the mountains and plains are full of white tongue asters, ageratum and dandelions.Butterflies come to the flowers in groups to feed on honey, white, yellow, black, flying around, tireless.The color of the tiger swallowtail is bright and majestic, with distinct lines; the blue swallowtail seems to be black all over, unadorned, but the wing veins are covered with a layer of golden phosphorous powder particles, refracting the sun, and emitting dazzling spots like stars; There is also Nongdie, which looks more ordinary and looks like a moth. It is small and has big eyes. This kind of butterfly seems to be jumping at high speed when it flies.They should be the first batch of adults to emerge this year, and they need to hurry up and eat to prepare for the next egg-laying and breeding season.
Luo Xiang is obviously very good at catching butterflies, he doesn't even need to look, he just stretches out his hand based on feeling, palms together, his movements seem random, but he succeeds every time.And he also likes to challenge butterflies that are more difficult to catch.Like the Ribbon Swallowtail, although it is a fairy-looking Liang Zhudie, but because of its slow flying speed, it is easy to get it, and there is no sense of accomplishment at all.
As for the Ascension to Heaven Sword and Swallow Butterfly, it is as light as a bird, fleeting, and can almost fly straight up in an instant. It is extremely difficult to catch with bare hands, and it is Luo Xiang's favorite prey.Every time he catches it, he has to hold the little butterfly in his palm and handle it, then let it go, catch it again, let it go again, and repeat this many times.
The little sea otter suddenly felt a little speechless, and he stopped playing such a boring little game after graduating from kindergarten.The little boss' hobbies are really peculiar.
Taking advantage of Luo Xian's fluttering of butterflies, Ta Nuo cautiously threw himself on his back, barking a few words softly.
Luo Xian happily released the butterfly in his palm, and turned to look at the little sea otter.He promised to swear that he could see a sense of excitement in the eyes of the little boss that "there is finally a more fun toy".
No, no, it must be an illusion.
The little sea otter shook his head, throwing out those strange thoughts.He eagerly grabbed Luo Xian's arm with his paws, wanting to tell the other party about the accident of the human delivery man, but he couldn't speak, so he scratched his ears with his paws anxiously.
"Don't move." Luo Xiang frowned, broke off the little sea otter's flailing paw with his hand, and said, "You lost your ear in a while, but no one will mend it for you."
How could the ear fall off?The little sea otter really doesn't understand the brain circuit of the little boss.
Finally, Luo Xiang took out his mobile phone, called up the text, and asked Little Sea Otter to type instructions.It's not easy to type with fleshy claws.He promised to use all four claws, and finally sacrificed his own nose. After a lot of effort, he finally typed a nonsense sentence:
I made a mistake.
Luo Xie looked at him with a smile, and didn't remind him that Nuo can completely change back into a human form and type.
"Oh." He replied indifferently, and pushed the phone to the little sea otter again, "Continue."
Resigned to his fate, the little sea otter struggled to finish a paragraph with his nose, gesturing and rolling, and finally explained clearly the big crisis that the human takeaway boy strayed into the louver forest and is still hanging on the tree.
He raised his head and looked at Luo Xiang eagerly.
Luo Xiang nodded, calmly expressing that he understood.
He promised to rest assured that the little boss said that he must have a solution to the problem.
Sure enough, Luo Xiang readily agreed to help.The little sea otter grabbed him with its paws and enthusiastically led him to the tree where the human was placed last night.Unexpectedly, when I arrived at the place, I found that the golden eagle brother, the second otter brother and Mr. Boa Constrictor had all come, and it was very lively.
And the human takeaway boy has been sent back to the ground at this time, wrapped in a layer of tattered banana leaves, with a smirk on his face, talking nonsense over and over again.Seeing a little sea otter leading a person walking towards him, he wasn't even afraid, and even smiled silly at him.
Originally, the little sea otter was terrified when he was spotted by the human delivery boy.He subconsciously hid behind Luo Xiang, grabbed his leg, tilted his head and peeked quietly.Unexpectedly, he met the rather helpless eyes of Mr. Boa Constrictor.
Mr. Boa constrictor waved at the little sea otter, and said loudly: "Don't hide, come out, it doesn't matter anymore."
The little sea otter looked at Mr. Boa Constrictor curiously.
Mr. Boa Constrictor explained that he was at the party last night. He originally wanted to look around for a strong man who could help erase human memory. He happened to meet an enthusiastic drunk and was grabbed by the other party and forced to drink a glass of berry wine. .His drinking capacity was extremely poor, and he was drunk immediately after drinking.He wanted to go home in a daze, but he accidentally stepped on the ground and rolled to the edge of a small stream, where he turned into his original shape and fell asleep coiled up until the sun was up.After waking up from the wine, Mr. Boa Constrictor felt that something was wrong, so he hurried back, only to meet the big golden eagle who was at a loss.
Brother Otter nodded, saying that his experience was similar.He didn't pay much attention to this matter in the first place. After he came back last night, he was directly pulled by the mother otter to do the aftermath of the party. He was busy until dawn, and he had completely forgotten about him. He only remembered it at noon today.
Brother Jindiao continued what Mr. Boa Constrictor had said, with a rather helpless tone. "I came to inspect the field this morning. The party last night was too crazy, and I was worried about leaving hidden dangers. I flew around, woke up a few people who were still hungover, and flew high into the sky again, and found him." He pointed to the delivery boy.The human brother was oblivious to the discussions around him, and was still giggling.
"I saw him hanging in mid-air, wailing loudly, crying and laughing, and thought that someone was still playing drunk, so I flew over and said a few words to him."
At that time, Brother Jindiao used the original form.
Speaking of this, Brother Jin Diao couldn't help but sighed.It is also because he has lived in the human world for too long, and he is no longer as sensitive to the difference between human spirits as before.In addition, the river bend area is not in the depths of the venetian forest, and no human beings have ever set foot in it before.He subconsciously thought that the person hanging on the tree was just a spirit who had turned into a human, so he went up to talk to him without even thinking about it, thus creating a predicament that frightened people stupid.
It is conceivable that the human delivery man was terrified all night, and suddenly saw a big bird speak human words to him, what a terrifying scene it was.He was frightened and fainted immediately, and when he woke up again, he became what he is now.If you say he is crazy, it doesn't seem like he is. Just now he was talking to Brother Jindiao and the others, and it sounded clear and logical, not crazy.That’s what he said, it sounds a little weird, I don’t know if there is any human allusion.
After hearing this, the little sea otter couldn't help but nodded.No wonder Big Brother Boa said it was okay.Now that the human takeaway brother has already seen the talking golden eagle brother, a little sea otter that can walk upright seems nothing special.He let go of the paws that had been holding on to Luo Xiang, walked slowly to the delivery guy, bent over and looked at him curiously.
At this moment, the human delivery boy suddenly shook his head, looking quite confused.He looked at the little sea otter and asked, "Are you also from Journey to the West?"
What?What Journey to the West?
The little sea otter frowned, and looked at the golden eagle and the others begging for help.
Brother Jin Diao shook his head and said, "I don't know what he's talking about either. When he woke up and saw me, he also said that I was from Journey to the West."
It seems that this human takeaway boy not only accepted his experience well after waking up, but also developed his own understanding system with a big brain.
As the bodyguard of the former domineering president, Brother Golden Eagle already has a lot of human knowledge, and he can live among humans for a long time without being noticed.However, there are more than thousands of human knowledge, and there are so many kinds of knowledge, most of the ghosts can only learn a little in their lifetime.Miscellaneous notes of gods and monsters like Journey to the West are in the knowledge blind spot of Big Brother Golden Eagle.
Mr. Boa, who is taking the postgraduate entrance examination, is more knowledgeable, and knows a little about the story of Journey to the West.It's just that he remembered that there was a monkey and a pig in Journey to the West. When did a golden eagle appear again?
The human takeaway guy slapped his thigh, hating iron for nothing, and said loudly, "It's the golden-winged roc eagle! It's in Journey to the West, because he wanted to eat the meat of Tang monk, he was finally captured by the Buddha."
He raised his finger, pointed hard at the golden eagle brother, and said with certainty: "Isn't it him!"
Several ghosts looked at him blankly.
The human takeaway brother suddenly felt a sense of loneliness that no one appreciates. "So you ghosts and ghosts don't read Journey to the West?" He sighed. "I thought this kind of novel would be very popular among you. After all, Journey to the West is a documentary literature for you, right?"
The little sea otter couldn't understand, so he shook his head.
The human takeaway boy seemed to have been suddenly opened up to a strange chatterbox, and suddenly he talked more, bursting out, like a machine gun that didn't jam.
"Thinking about it, Wu Cheng'en is a human being after all, and there is racial segregation. Your description may not be objective enough. But it doesn't matter. If you have any opinions, you can raise them. I feel that the big guys who make TV dramas are still very willing to rewrite it. A version of Journey to the West. Do you know what IP is? Journey to the West is an IP! Looking at 5000 years, if you put all the novels in order, it can also stand in the front row. I really like to read it. By the way, among you Is there any descendant of Sun Dasheng... No, it should be called Houhou? Is there any? Call it out and let me see. I am a fan of Sun Dasheng, and I would like to meet the descendants of idols. I can pay to have sex with him shake hands."
Suddenly he rolled over like a carp and sat up straight, with a look of loneliness on his face. "Oh, no, do you accept RMB? I don't have Mingbi for the time being. I don't know when my family will remember to burn paper money for me. My short-sighted buddy probably didn't remember that I was missing. But you don’t need to feel sorry for me, I don’t have any great qualities, but I’m just very open-minded, easygoing and down-to-earth.” As he spoke, he became happy again, and patted his chest violently.
The little sea otter looked at Mr. Boa Constrictor and barked.
I think this human might still be crazy.He said so.
Unexpectedly, the human takeaway brother heard his voice, and yelled, "Oh my god, so you are a dog. I just thought you were a sea otter."
……
Wang Wang Wang!
I was originally a sea otter!
The human delivery boy looked at him strangely, and said in amazement, "It really looks like a sea otter. I have seen sea otters on Weibo. They can wash their faces and take a shower. They are so cute. I thought I went to the zoo to see and see, but I heard that there are no zoos in the city. But I guess you are not a sea otter. There are no sea otters in the zoo. How can you run outside? By the way, you can bark, so what kind of dog are you Huh? Looks like it's Teddy? Isn't it?"
Without saying a word, the little sea otter sat down on the ground with a snap, stretched out his two front paws, and rubbed his face vigorously, as if washing his face.
Unexpectedly, the human delivery guy didn’t look at him, and continued on his own, “Why can’t you talk? That bird can talk, and it sounds like an uncle’s voice that is very popular with little girls. Do you practice You can’t get it right. Do you have inner alchemy? When did you become a spirit? After the founding of the People’s Republic of China? Did your family know that you became a spirit? Are your parents also monsters?”
The little sea otter was so angry that his head ached, he turned his head and ran towards Luo Xiang, ignoring the nagging humans.
The human delivery boy was still behind him to persuade, "Little comrade, do you know that you have to be diligent to be a monster? You can't just rely on your cuteness to do whatever you want. Like our food deliveries, we also have to pay attention to KPIs. If you don't work hard, you can't do it. And it’s not just about the quantity of business, it’s also about getting your customers to like you and be willing to give you five-star praise. Be like me, hehe, although I don’t want to be too proud, but to be honest, there is one thing to say, in the food delivery business, generally speaking , I did a good job."
He shook his head, seeming a little embarrassed. "As for me, how do I describe it to you? It means that Wu Yanzu is a takeaway. By the way, do you know what Wu Yanzu is? You don't know. Come on, look at my face. If you look like me, it's called Wu Yanzu. Haven’t heard of it, maybe you’ve seen it for a long time. Hahaha!”
The little sea otter took Luo Xiang's hand and covered his ears.
"Wu Yanzu like me is also very popular among customers. This season, I got the most five-star praise in our team. Really, I admire myself. Of course, I also Not only relying on appearance, I also take the route of strength. Last month, I didn’t take a day off. For 30 days, I worked nine or ten hours a day, and I didn’t even ask for leave when I had a cold or low fever. I walked the street Chuanxiang, there is no order that I can't deliver!"
The topic of food delivery is an area of interest to the little sea otter.It turns out that this is how human delivery staff work.He was fascinated by what he heard, and suddenly felt that the whole image of this human takeaway boy had grown taller.
"However, I am also willing. Why, after all, I like to deliver food. I have also worked as a courier for a while before. I am not bragging about myself, I am also a courier, and I am also Tony Leung in the courier industry. It was very successful, and the salary was good. I quit later, feeling that the food still couldn’t live up to it.
Every day I give food to people, the places I come in and out are all fragrant and popular places, I enjoy it very much.I also like to eat it myself.If it's not for delicious food, why do people have to work so hard?Anyway, for some reason, I feel that everyone is pointing at me to eat, and this feeling is quite good.No matter when to send, they are looking forward to me.What does this mean?This shows that I am worthy of dinner, what an honor this is. "
The little sea otter nodded vigorously, feeling sorry for him.This sense of empathy made the status of the human takeaway brother suddenly elevated in his heart, almost as tall as a small sapling.
Talking and talking, I don't know what to think, the human takeaway brother became sad again.
"Let me just say, you can't be too good at being a person. Once someone as good as me is targeted, it's hard not to be loved. You see, this is going to hit a ghost, right?" He lowered his voice and said mysteriously , "I heard that this ghost also looks at people's dishes. People with ugly looks and low values generally don't get the same treatment as me."
Finally, Mr. Boa Constrictor couldn't bear to talk. "How are you treated?" he asked.
Probably after finally waiting for someone to flatter him, the human delivery boy spoke more vigorously. "When I was young, my mother took me to fortune-telling. She said that it was some kind of mother-in-law. After burning incense, she could go to the human body, and then pinch her fingers to tell the fortune. Of course, I didn't believe it at the time. Now I think it might be There is such a thing. If that mother-in-law is your colleague or something, please do say a few words for me. I was young and ignorant at that time, and those who don’t know are innocent.
Ah, it's far away, it's far away, in short, this is the mother-in-law. After the upper body, I asked someone to tell my mother that I will be rich and rich in the future... I guess it's out of the question, but I can still do it without worrying about food and clothing, and it's hit Have an adventure.Do the math when I was in my 20s.Am I in my 20s now? "
Mr. Boa constrictor spoke again, "What adventure are you having now?"
The human takeaway boy met his palms, clapped hard, pointed at Luo Xiang and said loudly, "Isn't the gorgeous ghost an adventure?"
……
Luo Xiang's face turned black.
The little sea otter covered his mouth with his paws, squinted his eyes, and snickered.
"I heard that encountering a ghost, in ancient times, was a high-level treatment that only scholars and talented people could have. Although I only have a technical secondary school diploma, I can enjoy the same treatment as an intellectual. Isn't it just an adventure? So, that What □□ mother-in-law calculated my fate, it is too accurate! My mother's incense money for so many years has not been wasted."
After finishing speaking, the human takeaway brother finally calmed down, lowered his head and didn't know what he was thinking, and suddenly started crying, saying that he was sorry for his mother, if he knew it earlier, he should be more filial to the elderly, and accompany her to burn incense and so on .
Several audience members had different expressions on their faces.
Luo Xiang raised his arm, raised the knife and dropped it... Ahem, he beat the cow across the mountain with a knife in his hand, and knocked out the human delivery boy neatly.Then a beam of white light flew out from his forehead, fell into Luo Xian's palm, and instantly dissipated into a cloud.
The little sea otter tiptoed, and pushed Luo Xiang's hand away probing.
woof woof?
Luo Xiang nodded and said affirmatively: "Well, he has already forgotten what happened after last night. It's nothing serious, just get some sleep, maybe these points will be a little silly."
Anyway, he himself is already stupid enough, and it is estimated that he is not bad for a few days.
In fact, Luo Xiang has a more gentle way to make people forget.It's just that this human takeaway boy was too noisy, and he touched Luo Xiang's minefield. He was impatient to do useless work, and directly knocked him out.
Luo Xiang also helped to erase the order traces and call records left by Mr. Boa Constrictor.So far, when the human takeaway brother wakes up, no one will remember the accident.
Both Tano and Mr. Boa constrictor breathed a sigh of relief.The guilty Mr. Boa took all the cash out of his body and handed it to the delivery guy.He Nuo also picked some out of his pocket money to make up the whole thing, and he secretly stuffed a few crispy dried shrimps in the delivery boy's pocket as comfort, which was the rations he had managed to leave behind.
"You send him back." Luo Xiang glanced at the golden eagle brother.The golden eagle's flying ability is most suitable for transporting goods.
The golden eagle brother agreed to go.
So far, things have finally been properly resolved.
From Little Sea Otter's point of view, this takeaway incident was just a very interesting little accident in his life, which was soon forgotten by him.
Let's say that the human takeaway boy fell asleep for another day after being sent back to his residence by the golden eagle brother, and then woke up slowly.Several buddies who are also delivery workers surrounded him to ask his health.
One muttered, "What's wrong with you, the phone can't be reached, and the door can't be opened. I'm so scared that I want to go to the traffic bureau to check the accident report."
Another said, "I didn't see you yesterday, so I just asked for leave for you. If you don't feel well, you can rest for two days before canceling the leave."
Facing the concerned friends, the takeaway boy was deeply moved.It's just that he couldn't tell what happened to him.He had no memory of yesterday at all.He seemed to have slept a long, long sleep, and had a strange dream.This feeling is very strange.Maybe it's really like what my friends said, he worked too hard last month to sit down and get sick, and his body was still weak so he couldn't wake up.
He decided not to delve into it any further. Anyway, his body feels good now, and there is no discomfort at all.Meet and go out with friends for a big meal.After eating a big meal and satisfying his appetite, the delivery guy once again habitually let his imagination run wild.
"You said, is it possible that I actually went out yesterday?"
Friends have already seen his ability to talk nonsense, and they just responded perfunctorily.
The takeaway guy sighed and said: "I just have such a feeling that I didn't just fall asleep yesterday. Although I don't know why I went there, I always suspect that I was slept by someone. "
puff--
A friend sprayed his neighbor in the face with a sip of beer.
The delivery boy continued to analyze seriously, "Otherwise, how can you explain why I have so much extra money?"
Isn't this the ironclad evidence that someone covets my beauty and intends to sleep with me?
Also, he put dried shrimp in my pocket.This kind of loving snack is not love, what is it?
When the delivery boy was changing his clothes before going out for dinner, he suddenly took out a stack of banknotes from his body, which scared him into a circle on the spot.After the popularity of mobile payment, he has not used banknotes for many years.As for the small handful of dried shrimp, it is even more psychedelic - although, the dried shrimp tastes pretty good, it is fragrant and crispy, the shrimp meat is very Q, and it tastes sweet.
The delivery boy couldn't help but smack his lips, reminiscing about the wonderful taste.
But ah, the netizens are all right. Now that the world is getting worse, it is very dangerous for boys to go out, let alone him Wu Yanzu.
I just don't know why the other party suddenly changed his mind.
The takeaway boy helped his waist and confirmed again that his butt didn't hurt.
Could it be that when I lost consciousness, I was actually opened up to Ren Du's second channel, and the small universe broke out in an instant, caught that miscreant and beat him up, and performed a full martial arts?Awesome, myself!
Friends looked at him like they were looking at a big fool.
The takeaway boy snorted, and decided not to share his experience with these ordinary people who have no detective ability.After drinking and eating, he bid farewell to his friends, returned to the rental house, used his mobile phone to record the fragments of his dreams and his well-founded analysis, and posted the content on the Internet.
The title is:
"I often look out of place with other delivery guys because of my beauty, and the things that [-] Yanguis love and hate me (also known as, the record of the handsome takeaway guy)"
Author: Takeaway Wu Liangshi
Personality signature: I am born with a useful face
After watching the melon-eating crowd, they all said, these days, do ghosts have to be male ghosts?Are you so willing to engage in sex?Since you are going to make it up like this, then...then you can be more specific, I still have traffic.
Not to mention, the style of the post is light and strange, the writing is lively and vivid, it was reposted, and the click-through rate is not bad.If you search the Internet now, you can still see the grand occasion where the melon-eaters strongly demanded the poster to explode photos after watching the excitement.
Among the countless booing voices, only one comment seemed different and out of place.
A Digital ID user whose profile picture is a smiling sea otter took a selfie left a message: You are thinking of peach! ! !
You'll Also Like
-
The Growth System Comes at the Age of Thirty
Chapter 131 7 hours ago -
Family Immortal Cultivation: Li Clan
Chapter 1035 16 hours ago -
Longevity, starting from the blood contract turtle
Chapter 609 16 hours ago -
On the Avenue
Chapter 411 20 hours ago -
Diary of the Improper Monster Girl Transformation
Chapter 253 20 hours ago -
Wanjie Technology System
Chapter 701 20 hours ago -
Oh no, the young villain got the heroine's script!
Chapter 915 20 hours ago -
Having a child makes you invincible
Chapter 329 20 hours ago -
Just a quick calculation, you are a fugitive!
Chapter 657 20 hours ago -
Who brought this guy into the monastic circle?
Chapter 386 20 hours ago