What should I do if the object of the date is my first love!

Yan Dong vaguely remembered Song Kaiwen. Song Kaiwen seemed to be the one who dragged him into the dance floor that day. He was tall and thin, good-looking, and his hair was not long. In fact, under the dim light of the bar, he couldn't tell the difference between his short-cut hair. What color is it, at least it is not black in comparison, but it is not the same as the pink purple grandma gray next to it.

When he just sat in the booth, he happened to be sitting opposite him, and he stretched out his hand, with dry and slender fingers, and introduced himself to Yan Dong with a polite smile: "Kevin".

Yan Dong shook his hand and hesitated for a while, but still gave the name "Yan Dong"

Different from other people's inexplicable enthusiasm, he keeps a proper friendly distance, which makes Yan Dong have a good impression of him.He just had a casual chat with Jiang Chao that day.During the period, he also noticed that Kevin was always looking in their direction, Jiang Chao was always a little uncomfortable and dazed when he noticed his gaze, so Yan Dong thought he was looking at Jiang Chao.

"He has a good relationship with Jiang Chao?" Yan Dong asked while drinking from the cup

Qin Haoming thought that this was already sold anyway, so he just sold it more thoroughly and explained in detail that Kevin was about to chase after Jiang Chao, and even talked about and acted out all kinds of "hard bones" that Kevin said were not easy to chew. Being puzzled by the style, Yan Dong laughed several times.

"Hahaha, I didn't see that he was such a person that day."

"He's very good at pretending, but he's actually very dishonest, and he's especially carnal worshiper. He upholds the philosophy that life must be full of joy."

"That's a perfect match for Jiang Chaoman."

"Really? It doesn't seem to be that easy. He has been entangled with "that who" for half a year. As long as he can make up the game, he will make it up, but it's a pity that the progress is slow."

"That's not true. As for Jiang Chao, I still know about him. If he really has no interest in him, he won't let him inquire about my affairs? Speaking of this... about me, what have you inquired about?" ?”

"Puff—cough cough cough cough" Qin Haoming thought he had already changed the subject, but was caught off guard by Yan Dong's carbine, and coughed straight from the sour plum soup.

Yan Dong watched and smiled, he was in a hurry for a while, and handed him a tissue, then took a deep breath after making a big decision, and then continued: "Actually, I have already thought about the game you mentioned. Oh, please, Mr. Qin, I’m 27 and almost 28 years old, and I’m not a freshman. I’m not that naive. I was really excited about this thing at the time, but later, when I actually did it, I thought about the worst What did the result look like? I thought about it for a long time, and it couldn’t be worse than it is now, and I also think that even if it changes beyond recognition later, it will be better than what it is now. So, you don’t need to apologize at all.”

"I……"

"So, if today, what you want to talk to me is over, then I want to talk about, what I want to talk to you about."

"...What, what's the matter?"

"That day, after you left, I actually thought about it for a long time. What I thought about the most was whether the me I am now is worthy of your liking. Am I worthy of your liking?"

"Brother! You..."

"Listen to me first, huh?" Yan Dong patted the back of Qin Haoming's hand, who was a little excited, comfortingly. This was actually a meaningless gesture, but Qin Haoming felt miraculously that he was really comforted, and he was very obedient. He nodded and sat back.

"It's really embarrassing to say you like it at this age?" Yan Dong teased and continued.

"I know what the midsummer you liked at the beginning looked like. Looking back now, I also think that he was a very likable boy."

He smiled a little embarrassedly, it was indeed very narcissistic when he said it, but when he thought about "Midsummer", he couldn't help feeling envious, sunny, proud, and high-spirited.If such a young man passed by on the road, he couldn't help but look back for a while now.

"But I'm not like that." He smiled a little forcedly: "I'm not like that anymore."

Looking at those hands through the purple liquid in the glass.he repeated it again

"I'm not like that anymore, Midsummer."

"..."

"If you apologize, it seems that it is useless to say anything else. I can imagine the harm I have caused you. I am sorry, and I owe you."

"..."

"If possible, I am willing to use everything to make up for the damage I caused."

"..."

"If there is anything I have learned over the years, it is that I no longer make decisions for others without authorization."

"..."

"So Qin Haoming, I will tell you what I am now, what Yan Dong looks like."

"..."

"If you can still accept it, please allow me to pursue you."

In the following time, Yan Dong's tone was calm, and he talked about the events of the year as neutrally as possible, from the great change, to the failure of the college entrance examination that year, to how he "cured" himself, and finally, he finally freed himself.

When talking about those things again, Yan Dong was a little surprised to find that he was really calm, not as uncomfortable as opening an opening, as if he was just describing a story.

But he deeply understands that those things have actually happened, and he has truly changed himself.Now he is suspicious and sensitive, inferior and cowardly, his mind is full of dark thoughts, and the first thing he thinks of when encountering a problem is to avoid it.Hypocrisy hangs an illusion of being easy to get along with and has no temper. He is well versed in social rules, but in fact he is full of panic about getting along with people.

He's not as good as he was then, or even as good as he pretends to be now.

He forced himself, and also forced Qin Haoming to understand one thing: he is not Shengxia, and he will never be again.

The person Qin Haoming likes.

no longer exists.