Tomie's Son Dazai[Comprehensive]

He felt that his whole body became light and light, as if he was placed in a high cloud, surrounded by countless clouds.The things in front of me became blurred, flickering, and the light that seemed to be cast from a far away place or only in a very close place made people unable to open their eyes.There was also the voice of other people singing, and that singing voice was full of illusory compassion. After listening carefully, it seemed that he was nostalgic for the blue bird in the sky.

He closed his eyes, feeling dizzy for a while, as if being sucked into a vortex, this dizziness paralyzed all his senses.

where is this place?And why am I here?

Such thoughts came to mind involuntarily.

Maybe it's because I feel that my whole body has become light, so my brain has also become light, as if countless marshmallows have been stuffed into my mind, shaking, and I can still hear the sticky feeling in my brain. sound.

Gollum.

In a trance, he seemed to hear the sound of water.

Where is that sound coming from?

Gollum.

Gollum.

Gollum.

It wasn't until an indescribable pain came to consciousness, and the left eye hurt as if blood was flowing from there, that the man named Osamu Dazai realized that it was the sound coming from his own throat.

He was sinking, sinking, and the sound of drowning came out of his mouth.There is a rust-like taste in the nose and mouth.Is that his blood?

The brain became blank again.

When Osamu Dazai wanted to swim back instinctively, he stopped suddenly.Osamu Dazai looked at the endless colors in front of him, and another thought came to his mind.

Why go back?Wouldn't it be better to keep sinking like this?

Yes, it goes on and on...

However, just when he had such an idea, the scene in front of him suddenly changed.

—he heard the sound of the wind.

I don't know when he came to an empty, white space, where there is no color, no stars, no ocean and no voice.

Until a mechanized and cold voice came from not far away.

"No. 0619, the 0619th experiment." Osamu Dazai heard the voices of countless people in white coats.

what is that?

While Osamu Dazai was thinking this, the voice suddenly disappeared again, and he involuntarily walked towards the place where the voice came out just now.

Step, step, step.

In the silent and pale space, the only echo was Osamu Dazai's footsteps.

When he got there, he saw - the self that had been bred from the blood of a monster.

The young black-haired boy stood there quietly, with countless white "hands" tightly wrapped around him.

The young Dazai Osamu 0619 looked over, his blank and dark eyes seemed to reflect the abyss on his expressionless face, in which no light could be seen.

When No. 0619 looked at Osamu Dazai, a smile suddenly appeared on that expressionless face, and that smile seemed to be able to arouse all the negative emotions in people.

After that, what is reflected in the whole space is Osamu Dazai's life of constant dying.

How many times has it died and lived?Even he himself lost count.

Dazai closed his eyes.

When he opened his eyes again, the world in front of him suddenly changed again.Now he comes from a dark space, where there are no stars, no moon, and no light.

pat, pat, pat.

Something has come.

The black mud and red blood mixed together to form an indistinct "human figure".

He made a sound "—"

Even if he couldn't see the specific appearance of the opponent, Osamu Dazai knew it when he saw this "human figure" for the first time.

That is himself.In other words, that was another Osamu Dazai.

What an ugly and disgusting gesture that was. When he saw this, a strong sense of disgust surged in his heart, but at the same time, a strange sense of love surged into his heart.

He stretched out his hand, caressing the cheek of that "figure", the liquid so cold as to penetrate into the bone marrow kept slipping from the cheek of the "figure", and rolled onto Osamu Dazai's hand, bringing an extreme feeling pain.

He is crying.

"Why are you crying?"

The "doll" was still weeping non-stop, and made an indistinct sound.

"I…"

"I'm very sorry…"

"I…"

Papapapa, the blood kept slipping down.

Those things seemed to have some special ability, and as they kept falling on Osamu Dazai, his hearing and eyesight also became dull.

Until Osamu Dazai woke up, he didn't hear what the "doll" was saying.Only the pain and coldness are still with him until now.

Sitting on the bed, Osamu Dazai looked out the window, and there was a bright scene outside.

Its daybreak.

Lived again yesterday.

···

"So, you had such a dream last night?" Ango Sakaguchi put down the wine glass in his hand and asked with a complicated expression.

At this time, the two of them were drinking in the bar. When sitting together, Osamu Dazai cut some unspeakable things, and then roughly told Ango Sakaguchi about the dream he had last night.

Ango Sakaguchi, who had been listening quietly to the side, had a very delicate expression during this process, but he did not interrupt Dazai Osamu, but waited for the other party to speak before speaking.

"...What a surprise, so you can still dream." Sakaguchi Ango said with a shocked gesture, shaking his head and sighing.

"Hey, what do you mean I can still dream? It's too much." Osamu Dazai made a pitiful, weak and helpless appearance, but there was a smile in his voice.

But maybe it was because of the dream just now, Ango Sakaguchi could feel the other party's low interest, and he considerately pretended that he didn't hear anything.

"But why do you think so?" Osamu Dazai asked.

Ango Sakaguchi also laughed, and pushed his round glasses, he said: "How should I put it, probably because you look unreal, like another kind of creature? Turns out you still I can dream, and what I have can be said to be extraordinary nightmares. This sounds unbelievable."

"After all, you are that Dazai Osamu." Sakaguchi Ango teased.

In fact, he was just joking, but even Ango Sakaguchi didn't know it. Some of his subconscious thoughts realized some truths faster than him.

Osamu Dazai smiled and said nothing, and even thought about it in his heart: what kind of expression would Ango Sakaguchi show if he knew the truth.

"But..." Ango Sakaguchi glanced at Osamu Dazai beside him.

The black-haired young man was sitting on a bar chair, his overly thin body was wrapped in a black coat, and the white bandages wrapped around his body gave him a morbid beauty.The dim lights in the bar were switched off, making Osamu Dazai feel unreal, as if he would disappear completely in the next second.

Ango Sakaguchi picked up the wine glass and took a sip of the wine. The cold liquid slid into his throat and brought a bitter feeling. He considered his words and said softly: "If you dream of another "self" like that killing you It’s probably because you’re denying yourself subconsciously.”

—So he killed himself in the dream.

Hearing Ango Sakaguchi's words, Osamu Dazai did not overreact. He lowered his eyes and said vaguely, "Maybe."

Ango Sakaguchi followed in silence for a while, looking down at the wine glass in his hand, he shook it lightly, the wine showed a crystal clear feeling under the light, during the shaking, the ice cubes pressed on the bottom of the glass touched There was a crisp sound when it hit the wall of the cup.

This voice also broke the temporary silence between the two.

"Speaking of which, since Oda Saku didn't come today, I always feel that something is missing." Osamu Dazai propped his cheeks and said with a drunken smile in his voice.

Oda Sakunosuke didn't come here because he had to deal with the follow-up of a certain high-level lover and wife that day.At this time, only Ango Sakaguchi and Osamu Dazai were sitting on the bar chairs in the bar.

Smelling the smell of alcohol on the other party's body, Yasugo Sakaguchi kindly reminded: "Dazai-kun, don't drink too much. I still can't carry you back like Mr. Odasaku."

After all, he is still a civil servant after all, and he really can't carry Dazai Osamu on his back as casually as Oda Sakunosuke.

Although Ango Sakaguchi also knew that if Osamu Dazai "didn't want" to get drunk, then he would not be drunk anyway.It’s just that he counted. Before he came here, Osamu Dazai had already drank in this bar. A little too much.Maybe he is really in a bad mood today.

But after hearing Osamu Dazai's words, Ango Sakaguchi couldn't help complaining: "Will I complain without him?"

Sometimes he really suspected that Oda Sakunosuke was deliberately cooperating with Osamu Dazai, which made him completely reduced to a scornful slave.

The corners of Dazai Osamu's eyes were stained a little because of drunkenness, and his tone became lazy. He laughed and said, "How could it be?"

"Okay, I know Mr. Odasaku didn't do it on purpose, but you must have done it on purpose." Sakaguchi Ango said tiredly while holding his forehead.

Speaking of Oda Sakunosuke, Sakaguchi Ango's expression became more subtle, he looked at Dazai Osamu and said, "Although I knew before that the relationship between the two of you is extraordinary, but have you and Oda Saku-san become too close recently? "

"Is there?" Osamu Dazai blinked, showing a blank expression.

Forget it, if you think there is no, then there is no.

Ango Sakaguchi thought silently.

"Ah, I understand." Osamu Dazai thought for a while, spread out his left hand, hammered his right hand in the center of his left hand, and made a look of sudden realization. The expression said: "I see, Ango. Are you lonely because Oda Saku and I are too close?"

"Do you think of me as the kind of female high school student who feels lonely because two other friends are too close?" Sakaguchi Ango pushed his glasses and complained silently.

"Don't worry too much, even if I have a good relationship with Oda, we will not ignore you." Osamu Dazai said so, patted his shoulder, and gave him an expression that you don't have to be shy, I know it all.

"So I said no..."

"So Ango thinks so? Don't worry, Dazai and I won't ignore you."

Hearing this familiar sentence, Ango Sakaguchi was stunned for a moment, almost subconsciously thinking that Sakunosuke Oda was also here, then he reacted again and silently looked at Osamu Dazai.

Facing Ango Sakaguchi's speechless stare, Osamu Dazai looked at him seriously with an "Odasaku face", but within a few seconds he burst out laughing and said, "If Odasaku is here, it will probably be Let's put it that way."

Ango Sakaguchi looked at him expressionlessly, and then... covered his stomach and suppressed a laugh.

"Don't do that, it's too disrespectful to Odasaku-san."

"Ango, you laughed until tears came out."

After both of them finished laughing and recovered, Osamu Dazai hummed an out-of-tune tune, lowered his eyes, his face looked very soft under the light, and looked at Ango Sakaguchi.

"Thank you for worrying about us, Ango." Osamu Dazai said with a chuckle.

Ango Sakaguchi was silent for a while, smiled and did not speak.

Nothing, after all we are-

what is itfriend?If he is exposed, can they still be friends?

As soon as he thought of this, he lowered his head calmly and rubbed the bottom of the glass with his fingers, his eyes darkened behind the lenses.