Reshape the entertainment industry

A small blackboard was placed on the stage, with a table and chairs in front of it, just enough for everyone to sit, the female host sat down with everyone, and the male host stood beside the blackboard with a serious expression on his face Unfathomable smile.

"Come on, everyone, please sit down first, raise your hand if you have anything to report," said the male host, "Next, the first session of the old driver's class—"

Before the words were finished, the audience started booing.

"Everyone, don't get excited. You will make the teachers very nervous. After all, the teachers don't know what class they are going to teach."

After a while of laughing, the host continued: "So the first class - our teacher Feng is invited to come on stage!"

Feng Yu stood up with a smile and walked to the blackboard. A string of big golden characters flashed on the big screen behind.

Feng Yu watched for three seconds, the black question mark face turned to the audience, the laughing audience slowly quieted down under the signal of the host, Teacher Feng's unknown class officially started.

"Cough, does anyone know what this is?" Feng Yu asked with a stiff smile, and the eight faces below looked at him innocently, "You don't know it just by looking at it!"

Feng Yufan came out: "Did you be asked to review the text in advance yesterday? The result! No one knows! Everyone will copy it a hundred times later!"

"Teacher, we are wrong," Feng Yu's female partner raised her hand, "Hurry up and give a lecture, what the hell is this?"

"..." Encountering a partner who is tearing down the stage, he must first stabilize himself, Feng Yu looked back pretendingly, and coughed again, "Do you guys look at this string, it doesn't look like words, it doesn't look like paintings, there are The charm of oracle bone inscriptions, but also the elegance of Greek?"

"Teacher, what does the Greek language look like? I haven't seen it before. You can write it out and have a look. We also want to appreciate the elegance of the Greek language." Curious baby student You Shao raised his hand.

"Why do you keep interrupting the teacher's class?" Feng Yu said with a straight face, "Do you know that the teacher has a schedule? Do you want me to write out the Greek language for you to read? Can't your mobile phone access the Internet?"

"Behave yourself!" Feng Yu raised his voice and shouted, "Continue what I just said, I gave you so many hints, didn't you think of anything?"

"...Mysterious alien civilization?" The hostess began to take the rhythm.

"...This student has a good imagination," Feng Yu picked up the whiteboard marker, "but it's not this one. This string of characters is something we are very familiar with and often use——Yomoji!"

Guests, audience, host: "???"

"The content of today's lesson is - how to use new kaomoji in the Internet age! Look!" Feng Yu got excited, and drew a few strokes on the blackboard according to the screen, "This, is it a villain kneeling down and crying?" How vivid the hands are! Look at the latter one, is it a posture of a person flying with one foot? Yes! Well, I have already demonstrated the first two to the students, and I will show them below You have 1 minute to solve the meaning of the kaomoji below!"

Guests, audience, host: "???"

"Why are you looking at me?" Feng Yu looked at everyone's eyes looking at him, "Understand? That's fine, You Shao, come up and explain to everyone!"

You Shao cooperated very well and stood up and walked to the front, pointing at the screen and began to tease: "The third one is a man vomiting blood while flying upside down, followed by an expression of eating, and then a man lying flat on something , the last is a square monument. So, the meaning of this paragraph is, two men fight for a woman, the woman is crying, the man who wins eats the man who loses, who knows who lost The man poisoned himself, the man who won was poisoned and died, and the two became a monument!"

Guests, audience, host: "WTF???"

"Very good, great!" Feng Yu put his arms around You Shao's shoulders, "Students, watch carefully, your role model! You can understand as soon as you teach! You can master it by yourself! Such a learning ability, Tsinghua University is not a dream!"

You Shao smiled generously and decently: "Thank you teacher, my goal is Harvard."

"See! It's not limited to the small goals set by the teacher! Where there is a will, there is a way!"

Guests, audience, host: "..." I couldn't see it...

With the support of all the staff, the male and female hosts pushed the two back to their seats and announced the teacher for the next session - Zhong Wenyu.

Zhong Wenyu walked to the blackboard, and after a pompous prelude on the screen, four big characters in full swing——Love Trading appeared.

Zhong Wenyu: "???"

The sound teacher also specially cooperated to play a brainwashing melody for everyone. Bai Yucheng rolled his eyes in his seat and felt like he was about to pass out...

"Cough, thank you, Mr. Audio, for your enthusiasm," Zhong Wenyu said, "I managed to forget what I was trying to say just now..."

The audience laughed very cooperatively, and the latter continued: "Students all know that this is a song for brainwashing, but in fact, they have not thought about what is reflected behind this song. Today, I will take you, from financial Let’s understand the buying and selling of love from a different perspective.”

"First of all, love is an emotional response that cannot be measured, has no entity, and has no standard of judgment. Buying and selling are valid for it. Then in this case, we assume a prerequisite that love has A standard that can be valued can be measured by splitting the right to use it as an emotional body into several shares and uploading it to the trading electronic disk, so that buying and selling behaviors can be generated. When different types of social events occur, the impact on love It will be reflected in the ups and downs. For example, the divorce rate in 16 has increased by 0.1% compared with the previous year. There is no doubt that the K-line trend will definitely decline because people's trust in love has decreased. For example, Jay Chou got married last year, and the majority of netizens believed in love again. Obviously, the K-line trend is rising at this time, and within a period of time, it happens frequently... So how to buy and sell love based on these curves and effective information? Here we introduce the pressure side And the terms of the support surface... M-type and W-type are very typical K-line charts, basically you can buy and sell according to the laws I just said, and there are some special ones... To sum up, it is for love trading A hypothetical analysis of a transaction is based on a measurable basis, but for millions of years since the birth of human beings, love as an emotional response has never been measurable because its value is far from inestimable. Once everything is put on a chain of value It will fall down the ivory tower, and love can remain young forever in the ivory tower because people always believe and yearn for it."

……

Quiet guests, audience and studio...

"...I can't believe what I just heard?" The female host came back to her senses in time and stood up, "I won't record the director, I have to go back and learn it all over again!"

The audience finally came to their senses, and after looking at each other in blank dismay, there was a sudden burst of applause.

"I didn't expect that we really invited a real person! Look at what you said to these audiences who have never seen the world! I guarantee that they didn't understand at all!" The male host patted Zhong Wenyu on the shoulder and teased , prompting angry boos from the audience below.

Zhong Wenyu's wave really shocked many people, and the host asked him a lot about what he said just now. After asking, he was amazed: "I can't figure it out, why did you come to the entertainment industry? It's the financial industry." Isn't the food delicious?"

Zhong Wenyu smiled slightly: "It's hard to give up on a natural beauty..."

The audience laughed and sent a wave of boos again, and this "true" lesson was considered to be over.

Zhong Wenyu was followed by a female guest, who also performed very well. The laughter in the studio basically didn't stop. The fourth was Xiang Wei. The little boy kept saying wrong things nervously, blushing like a persimmon, and just hit the female audience. Be cute, he bursts into laughter whenever he makes a mistake. The fifth place is Feng Yu's female partner, who is full of sense of variety, and the atmosphere is basically not too cold. The sixth place is finally the turn of You Shao, who is gearing up for a big fight.

You Shao stared at the abstract painting on the screen for a long time, and finally realized: "Oh, hello! This is a personal position!"

The author has something to say: Hey, I talk too much nonsense. I originally planned to write about the two of them in one chapter... How angry, all the plots I wrote are just to make do with them, but they haven't called yet!snort!