can't stop

After all, that kick didn't go down, Huo Ying was just so distracted for a while, he didn't want to kick, maybe the reluctant time was too long, somehow he was turned over and continued to play.Huo Ying couldn't remember when he closed his eyes. Anyway, he was dazed for a while, and when he woke up again, he was lying on his stomach. There was only one night light on in the room. Shi Yu Feng propped his arms beside the pillow, She looked at him quietly and intently, with a refreshed look on her face.

Huo Ying rubbed his eyes and calmed down. He realized that he seemed to be dizzy. It was a great shame. After all, he was also a person who could run marathons and paraglider without an oxygen mask. When did his body become so useless?

He asked sullenly, "What time is it?"

Shi Yufeng wiped off the semi-dry liquid splashed on the dial, took a look, "37:[-]."

"...Why don't you sleep?" Huo Ying swept the red and deep tooth marks and scratches on the guy's shoulders and chest, and couldn't figure out when he got them there, but maybe the kid was full of sleep Can it be eliminated?He blushed and arched, leaning on Shi Yufeng, "Sleep peacefully, don't get excited, I've set the alarm clock, we won't be late tomorrow."

With this arch, the tactile sensation of the body rubbing against the fabric was also revealed. Huo Ying realized that the tattered suit had been stripped off, and he was completely naked, so he covered himself with a thin quilt. He touched his butt again, although it was still hot , but still dry, it was cleaned.He felt more and more ashamed, of course it was the kind of embarrassment that felt good, but when he heard it, Yu Feng said: "I found this under the pillow."

"Ah?" Huo Ying looked up, and saw Shi Yu Feng holding a pure white envelope in his hand, handed it to him solemnly, and gently squeezed his fingertips, "I think you need to open it yourself. "

Even if Huo Ying was killed, he would never have expected to see such handwriting here and now.

It's his father's font. The old man has always had an old-school style. He followed Zhao Mengfu's regular script as a model for Chinese writing, and he handled his pen neatly and freely.Huo Ying was also forced to copy for no less than five years when he was a child, and he still has a good handwriting.

On the envelope in front of me, there is a line of regular script, which is actually four words:

【Sizi Yingqi】

"I guess I left a letter for everyone. I'm the fourth." Huo Ying wiped off the sweat dripping from the tail of his brows, and sat upright by the head of the bed without any fluctuations on his face. Without talking to me so much, my dad likes to scare people."

Shi Yufeng also sat up straight, and the two of them squeezed together on a small single bed, staring at a piece of envelope intently, sitting upright like a primary school student delivering "secret information".

The envelope was very brittle, and it clicked when it was opened, so it must have been old.The black pen writing inside was big and heavy, and there were three sheets in total. Huo Ying unfolded the letter paper, and first looked at the inscription on the last page. It was still in traditional Chinese characters, and it said "the first day of the fifth month of the year [-]".

Good guy, Huo Ying was still No. [-] in the world at that time, and the qualifying round at Monza probably just ended?Italy is hot and dry in summer, and he may be drinking with a count who sponsors a motorcade in Rome, or he may be hiding in a Renaissance-style bathroom and throwing up.

"...you read it to me," Huo Ying glanced at the dark lines again, and suddenly pressed the letter paper on Shi Yufeng's naked belly, kneading his brows, "I don't want to read it. Traditional characters are okay, right?" ?” he asked again.

"I know more traditional characters than simplified characters." Shi Yu Feng also rubbed his eyes, and carefully flattened the stack of crisp paper.When he was a child, he spoke Cantonese in addition to English from nanny to tutor. Whether he lived in his family in San Francisco or later in Melbourne, traditional Chinese became more prevalent.Although Shi Yufeng has always felt that the so-called "Tang dialect" is not pleasant and not convenient, but he has been fascinated by it, and it comes in handy at this moment——in front of his sweetheart, the typical performance of a young man wants to rush up, Shi Yufeng Determined never to mispronounce a word, but also to read with emotion.

So his father's words, in the voice of a lover, spread in Huo Ying's ear:

"Xiaoying,

"I haven't called you that in more than ten years. Today is your 24th birthday. In the second zodiac year, my father just woke up after an operation. I always feel that I need to say something to you, but I don't care to meet you." It's really hard. I'm afraid both father and son will be embarrassed, so it's better to write it down.

"I asked the hourly worker to put this letter under the pillow every time he changed your sheets. If you come back to this house one day and spend a night in the garage you are most obsessed with, you should be able to read it.

"Come back to business, the following are my father's thoughts. It is said that ten years is a generation gap. I only had you at the age of 47. This is almost Wudaogou. To be honest, I still can't understand you. In various aspects, now Still. Like I can't understand your mom who is 13 years younger than me, I don't think she should be racing, especially after she's 40.

"You may not be impressed, about my quarrel with your mother. She is too adventurous, and I can be said to be timid. In terms of life choices, there are more and more differences between us, and no one backs down , so there is no solution.

"Now I have to tell you how your mother passed away when you were seven years old, just before her 41st birthday.

"I lied to you, and your brothers and sisters. It wasn't a sudden illness. She died in an accident. I saw you on the news a few days ago at the Budapest circuit in Hungary. You were also on that track just now. I have achieved very good results on the track, much faster than your mother was back then.

"Back then, I mean back then, on the eve of the race, we were still arguing about the divorce. Normally I would wait for her in the pits before the race. That time I let her go by herself, but I still watched the live broadcast. Seeing her There was an accident, there was a big fire, I just received a call, and when I rushed over, she was lying in the intensive care unit, her whole body was scorched black. The doctor said that the fire from the racing car was higher than 3 degrees, and she was trapped in it for nearly 20 In minutes, the lungs have been burned out, and less than [-]% of the tissue left is good.

"Every day, a meter-long iron pipe was used to suck out bloody and dirty things from her lungs. Many times she collapsed from the pain, but she couldn't even utter a word of discomfort.

"I can only stay with her. If you want me to trade my life for her to be less painful, that would be great. If I can. But my life can't be exchanged for anything, and your father can't protect his woman in the end. You are very smart, very Sensitive, I should still remember that that year, your mother and I disappeared for more than a month, and then I came back alone to tell you that my mother was gone.

"I won't let you look at her, and she will be burned when I return home. Her last sentence is, don't scare the children.

"That's the whole story of it.

"I don't want to say that I object to your car racing for some noble reasons. Indeed, it is very simple. I am afraid of your death. To be honest, I regret it. When you showed fascination with cars when you were a child, I should have blocked you. I regret that I didn’t lock up my car you refitted, and I also regret that I didn’t burn all your miscellaneous books. When you play with the car, the kind of joy is exactly the same as your mother. You take the same risk and send the same hair. If you say the same thing, you can't stop it. You pursue your huge dreams.

"What if one day you also encounter the same uncontrollable danger?

"It's something I've been thinking about all these years. I don't want to see my best young son in the ICU again, whether he's burned to the ground, crushed in half, or has a leg bone stuck in a hard raw iron.

"However, now I may have changed some views. It may be because I am too old, and I have a lot of underestimated life and death. I don't know when this change happened. Simply put, I don't object to you playing racing. I won't tremble with anger when I think of you, and I won't call you unworthy descendants at family dinners, even though I have scolded you like this all these years. Son, you are young, independent, full of courage and determination, and you have the pursuit of what you want I have no right to deprive you of all the rights you want. I apologize to you for the mistakes I made when I tried to deprive you of them.

"I read your interview, and your English is much more fluent than mine at 24 years old. You said that you are aware of the risks of this career, but you have more important things to hold on to than the things that ordinary people value that you may lose.

"I may not be able to keep up with your thinking, but I guess, that is honor, the respect of others, and more importantly, your respect for your own ambitions. Your mother used to like to say, don't want to look down on yourself, don't want to regret, she may This kind of stupidity is also directly passed on to you.

"I still go to Wutai Mountain to worship Buddha every Spring Festival, and I also donate merit to your mother. I even begged you before, asking you to suffer some minor injuries that are not life-threatening on the field, and it would be best to go home if you can't drive anymore. Now I knew it was a big mistake. Next time I go to Mount Wutai, I will ask you to be safe and defend your title every year.

"I originally typed this out to send you an email, but forget it. The stalemate between you and this family is actually good for you. You can go to the game without any worries, right? You may also have greater motivation. Since childhood, you have been the kind of child who is getting more and more stressed. I am not a good father. I have done wrong things in the past, and I can’t ask for your understanding at this time. If you When you come back, seeing that I am sick and old, you will forgive everything immediately. Your sister said that you will definitely retire and stay with me to die, so forget it!

"I don't know how old you will be when you read this letter. It is very likely that I am dead and you come to the funeral. It is also very likely that your brothers and sisters will say a lot of ugly things to you. Dad has already passed away. I can't control it anymore, just treat them as stupid and talk nonsense, just like when you were a child. I just hope you can understand two things after reading this letter. First, I'm sorry. Second, you don't owe your mother, and you don't owe I don't owe this family anything.

"Dad wants you to have a wider universe, always insist on your pursuit regardless of everything, always be humble, always have backbone, and never learn to give in. Racing cars are not the kind of 'big toy that my son likes' like I used to scold you, or something 'Pick up a girl'. It is your partner, it is your boat, and you are competing with crazy, unruly and dreamy people. If you want to be stronger than them, you have to be crazier and dare to dream , more able to give up everything. Regarding this point, your understanding must be deeper than mine.

"One more thing. I just talked about picking up girls. I wonder if you have taken a girl home now? I have said it many times. Although you are face-blind, others are not. Just find someone who really likes your face. It's better to be able to bear your bad temper. Dad still hopes that you will pick up more girls, and I can't point out who to introduce, but I believe in my son's charm. Until now, those old neighbors see your photos and reports and say you Like Tony Leung, rushing to introduce you to someone!

"I know, introductions are useless, you only talk to people you really like, don't think that I haven't heard how cold you are to people in school, and you use the excuse that you are face-blind and no one likes you, but in fact, no one likes you! If Who did you bring home when the iron tree bloomed this time, remember to show it to me, if I am already dead, you can go with that person, sign a letter on this letter paper, and burn it for me to see, Dad believes in you Eyesight, fat or thin, beautiful or ugly, Chinese or foreign, if you are willing to bring someone back to our little corner, it must be the one who will die with you.

"Finally, at this age, you don't have to cry when you are going to the funeral! After all the instructions, you will always be the proudest youngest of your parents."

This is the end. After Shi Yufeng finished reading, his mind was racing around, as if he was thinking a lot, but he didn't seem to think about anything.He managed to read a word correctly, but he didn't care about it at this time. He looked at Huo Ying quietly and held his sweaty hand. He was silent about those old mechanical books for seven or eight minutes, and suddenly smiled, ho ho, his shoulders trembled, his Adam's apple rolled, the end of his eyes was raised gracefully, he narrowed his eyes, and smiled with a mixture of sadness and joy.

"What is this called? Isn't this old man too vicious?" He looked at Shi Yufeng, "I used to think that I was fighting against the whole world alone, it was so cool, ha, he was cold-hearted, and suddenly Made it so affectionate."

"People like to confess when they are old." Shi Yufeng looked objective and calm. He carefully observed Huo Ying's eyebrows and eyes. "Before my father died, he also called me to the bedside and told me about my mother. I apologized a lot, and I wanted to protect me all my life when I was old, he was only 26 years old at the time, it was like having a son all of a sudden."

"Then do you think your dad is sincere?" Huo Ying asked seriously.

"Yes." Shi Yu Feng answered truthfully, "He wouldn't cry even when he killed someone. He kept crying that day, and he seemed panicked and helpless. People are dying, so there's no need to lie to me."

Huo Ying took the stack of letter papers, pointed to a wrinkle, and some words blurred out, "This is also tears," he leaned on Shi Yufeng's shoulder, and poked his fingertips on the different pieces of paper On the face, lightly played, suddenly approached Shi Yufeng's ear, and said mysteriously, "Student Xiao, you can summarize through the reading just now, what is the central idea of ​​my father's long speech?"

Shi Yufeng thought for a while, and answered honestly: "It's his fault, not yours."

"It's not my fault..."

"Also, you are so cool, and now you have won the affirmation of your family."

Huo Ying smiled again, softly and loosely. He drooped his eyelashes, then raised them up suddenly, "I think the time is fine now, can you find a pen now?"

Shi Yufeng took off the blue and black ballpoint pen from the "Sudoku Complete Book" that was fixed in the suitcase, and the two of them bent down on the small bed. Huo Ying wrote first, and he wrote later. His name is printed on this fragile old letter paper.

After finishing writing, Huo Ying stared at the three words under her name, and sighed worriedly, "The words are too ugly, how do you usually sign the names of the girls outside the track?"

Shi Yufeng was dissatisfied, "I never sign it, it's so annoying." Although he was stubborn, he still added a line of English names below, which he often wrote, but it was chic and fluent.Huo Ying nodded to express his satisfaction, but grabbed Shi Yufeng's left hand holding the pen, and said seriously, "From today onwards, I will supervise your calligraphy practice! If you write like me, it will be done."

"Huh?" Shi Yu Feng knew that he was holding back his laughter, and for a moment he was ashamed and angry, and pressed him to lie back on the bed to scratch it. Shi Yu Feng knew those itchy pieces like the palm of his hand, and Huo Ying's giggles almost turned into screams I finally managed to squeeze out a sentence: "If you practice well, there will be rewards, and there will be rewards!"

Shi Yufeng was relentless, still scratching and pinching, "What reward?"

Huo Ying blushed, and leaned into his ear and said, it's Yu Feng's turn to blush, this reward is terrible, it's not just as simple as letting you sleep for a night, it's not as vulgar as wearing sexy underwear for you to see, it's almost Immediately, Shi Yufeng made up his great determination to practice extensive and profound calligraphy.

The next day, it was already three o'clock in the afternoon when we left the cemetery, and Huo Ying felt relieved.Although the mourning clothes he prepared in advance were gloriously killed, he had to wear someone's oversized shirt and trousers, but whether it was his two bruised and swollen elder brothers who were miserable, or the stack of stamped letter paper that had been burned to ashes, All made him relieved.I don't know if it's the effect of the letter, or the magic of his family, when he and Shi Yufeng bowed to the tombstone side by side, their hearts were as calm as a mirror.

Rejecting the eldest sister's invitation to go home for dinner, Huo Ying led Shi Yufeng to the treasured place of his childhood - the bridge across the sea that has been deserted since it was repaired.

He knew in his heart that this was the last time he stood on it, just like it would be the last time he was in his hometown.

"I drove up to [-] on this road, listening to AceHood and Michael Jackson." He leaned on the fence of the sidewalk, overlooking the foggy sea in summer and the gradually dimmed city in the bay, talking about his second year of middle school history.

And Yu Feng, who was in the second phase of middle school, was eager to try when he heard the words. Seeing that he was about to sit back in the car and not give up until he drove that old Volvo to [-], Huo Ying hurriedly grabbed him, "The speed limit is [-], I don't want you to squat!"

And Shi Yufeng has shown dissatisfied expressions from time to time since being ridiculed for being ugly, Huo Ying is always stared at by him a little hairy, just like this time, he felt that he was quick-mouthed last night, and he would be revenged on the bed tonight. He quickly hooked the back of Shi Yu Feng's neck, and cheekily kissed his lips, "Okay, if you keep saying that I'm good, will you be good too?"

Shi Yufeng kissed back dissatisfied, to be precise, bit back, his fangs were still so aggressive, and the arms that hugged Huo Ying's waist were still proficient.This messy and crooked kiss was interrupted within a few seconds. It was Shi Yufeng's cell phone that echoed. He clicked his tongue irritably, swiped to answer it, and listened without saying a word, frowning.

Huo Ying was admiring his stinky face in the setting sun.

The person on the other side was obviously a cheerful person. Within a minute, Shi Yufeng put down his phone, "I missed two races, and the next one will be in ten days." Be careful and cautious, "Qiu Shili asked me if I want to go back."

Huo Ying was calm, and he grasped the point at once, "How much are you behind by No.1 in points now?"

"34 points."

"How many games are left before the finals?"

"Three games."

Huo Ying's brows loosened, and the tails of his eyes were raised up, "There's still something to be done, this year we'll be in the top three, of course we have to go back!"

"I..." Shi Yufeng hesitated to speak.He obviously didn't mean to say nonsense like "the three months of lockdown have not yet come", what he really wanted to say was hard to say.

But he didn't want him to speak, Huo Ying understood, he proudly embraced Shi Yufeng's shoulders, put his head next to his, and watched the sun dissolve in the sea with him, "I'll go back too, I, Hu Hansan — with you."