variation

In the middle of the night, and in the hospital again, this scene was really scary. Chen Jianan sat up from the bed, rubbed his face, and forced himself to calm down.

"Family man, come here." The old lady said. After she got sick, she was in a coma and took medicine. She rarely woke up, and she didn't talk much. Only now did Chen Jianan realize that the old lady's speech was no longer clear. She It is difficult to speak a word with a strained throat, as if there is a broken gong in the eyes of the throat, hoarse, vague, and unpleasant.

Chen Jianan pulled up a chair and sat down, thinking that it was a big New Year's Eve, and the patients in the same ward went home for the New Year's Eve after the doctor's check-up, otherwise they would have to be kicked out in this situation.He also thought that the old lady's time was approaching, and she wanted to entrust him with his funeral.But his family has nothing to entrust with the funeral, there is only so little property in total, Chen Jianan has turned upside down when he was in junior high school, his family is really poor and white.

The old lady has been crying non-stop, she has always been a shrewd and capable rural woman, but at this moment, her eyes are cloudy, full of tears accumulated in her long life. "Yes... sorry."

When Chen Jianan heard this sentence of sorry, he was stunned for a moment. The old lady did not love her grandson like other old people doting on her grandson, but after all, she raised him without lack of food and drink. He didn't know where this sorry came from. .

The old lady took Chen Jianan's hand and said vaguely: "Dongzhen market...Northwest corner...500 yuan..."

Chen Jianan is suspicious, not to mention 500 yuan, 100 yuan is a huge sum of money for the old lady, it can't be the old lady's life savings.But in Chen Jianan's impression, there was no bank at all in the northwest corner of Dongzhen Bazaar, which was already the edge of the market.

The old lady's hand exerted strength. Chen Jianan didn't expect that the old lady could still squeeze his hand so painfully. The old lady closed her eyes, and she murmured, "Where I am... spend 500 Yuan Qian bought you back."

Chen Jianan was struck by lightning.

The equipment next to the old lady issued a harsh alarm sound. Doctors and nurses rushed in and pushed Chen Jianan aside. The doctor looked at the situation and told the nurses beside him: "Get ready for rescue."

Chen Jianan was sitting on the bench outside the operating room, still thinking about what the old lady said just now.

Dongzhen Market is the closest market to Xishui Village. People from ten miles and eight villages will go there to sell some agricultural products and buy some daily necessities. It has been held every Wednesday and Sunday for more than 20 years. Chen Jianan used to sneeze here Walnuts were sold.

The school is 500 meters north of the Dongzhen Bazaar. After Chen Jianan sold out his walnuts, he hurried back to school.But his allergies were really severe, and he sneezed tearfully all afternoon. He couldn't hear what the teacher was saying, and his ears were buzzing with tinnitus.

Chen Jianan actually likes to go to school, and the opportunity for him to study is really very difficult.When he was in elementary school, he was in Xishui Village. There was a dilapidated school in Xishui Village. There were only dozens of children all year round, and even the light of compulsory education could not shine here.There are two teachers in the school, and one of them is the principal. Every year, they have to wait for a few students from the nearby normal university to send a few interns to support teaching. They stay in a hurry for three months and then leave. A group of trainee teachers.

Chen Jianan struggled through his primary school in this way, but he was very smart, and his primary school homework was simple. When he took the exam, he was admitted to the town's junior high school.He went to school every day before dawn, and when he returned to Xishui Village in the evening, the willows were already in full bloom. From time to time, he would ask for leave to work at home when the old lady was not feeling well.Han Lai Shu went to junior high school for three years, and thanks to his wit, he was admitted to high school again.

But most of the people in Xishui Village stopped studying after they reached junior high school, not because they didn’t want to, but because they couldn’t afford it.The price of high school tuition is not low. Because of the tight schedule and boarding at school, Chen Jianan is already very reluctant to have enough food and clothing, so he chooses to go to school again.

But high school is obviously not as simple as he thought, he can no longer rely on his own intelligence, every class he misses is a real point of knowledge, and the old lady always orders him because he is already sixteen or seventeen. Doing some things, Chen Jianan slowly began to feel that reading has become listening to the bible.

But it was his own choice to bite the bullet and go to high school. Since then, Chen Jianan has been a person with a heavy sense of ceremony and love for face. The way.He began to voluntarily give up studying and drifted with the crowd to be the most out-of-the-ordinary middle school student who didn't learn well at that time.

Thinking back on these things, Chen Jianan was already very calm, but at that time, he was in great pain. In his heart, he always felt that he was out of tune with Xishui Village and should not belong to this place, but when the only way for him to leave here dignifiedly failed In the future, to put it in a more hypocritical and disgusting way, Chen Jianan felt that he had watched himself break his own wings.

Fortunately, Chen Jianan finally left that place, and at this moment he knew that he really did not belong to that place.

But Chen Jianan still couldn't stop his tears. He buried his head on his elbow and began to cry in a low voice. He had seen too many such scenes in the hospital.

The old lady would force him to pay homage to his "father"'s grave every year. For nearly 20 years, Chen Jianan had to kowtow and burn paper to that person he had never met every year.But where are his parents?

If I had never left my real parents, would I still be living this kind of life, becoming a contemptuous adopted lover?Facing the white wall of the hospital, Chen Jianan thought in a daze.

The lights in the operation snapped out, the doctor came out, took off his mask, and said, "Sorry, the patient has passed away."

After Chen Jianan finished crying, he nodded calmly, "Can you be cremated as soon as possible? We'll leave at dawn."

The old lady was buried next to her son's tomb in Xishui Village.Chen Jianan finally burned the paper for the mother and son.He didn't want to excuse the old lady, but he could imagine the old lady's pain back then.

She has never been out of Xishui Village in her life. The first time she entered the provincial capital was to get married and order clothes. She was full of longing for a happy life in the future, and the second time was to bring back her son's cold body.Then her daughter-in-law ran away, leaving her a dilapidated home.

Chen Jianan can understand how the old lady gave up everything to buy a boy as the sustenance of her life when all her thoughts were lost.But it would be nice if this boy was someone else, Chen Jianan would definitely understand and sympathize.But this boy is Chen Jianan himself, he just feels complicated.

The funeral was simple, only a few people in the village who were in charge of red and white affairs came to help. Chen Jianan thought about it and wrapped a big red envelope for each of them.

If there were no accidents, Chen Jianan felt that he would not come back in the future.

He returned to the house he had lived in for more than ten years. The house was dilapidated and run-down, and the inside was dark and messy. It can be seen that the life of the old lady was not easy during the few years when Chen Jianan hadn't come home.

It can barely be regarded as the sleeping room, with many photos hanging on the wall, this is the most shining place in the whole family, and there are also photos of Chen Jianan when he was a child.Around the time when Chen Jianan was just bought back, Chen Jianan was completely naked, lying on the table in the photo studio in the town, and took a naive commemorative photo. The old lady stood beside her, her expression was nervous but obviously smug .

Chen Jianan had never noticed it before, and he had never thought about the meaning behind such an expression.

He reached for the photo and put it in his pocket.

After completing the formalities, Chen Jianan moved his household registration out of Xishui Village. He used to feel that his indifference to Xishui Village was a manifestation of vanity and inferiority. Now he realized that people's sixth sense is really so sensitive. It just never belonged in that place.

But these are not enough. Chen Jianan still wants to know where he came from, who his parents are, and whether it is possible for him to return to their side.When living in a lie that you never had, you may still feel that you have a father lying in the grave and a mother who has disappeared.The lie was over, and Chen Jianan's longing for his relatives became extremely strong.

He posted his own information on the family search forum, because Gu Nian was an "Internet celebrity", Chen Jianan didn't dare to post photos.Such a chance is actually very slim. On the family search website, even if you refine your information down to your blood type, the possibility of finding your relatives is very slim. any tokens.

But it doesn't matter anymore, Chen Jianan only needs one thought.

After finishing all this, Chen Jianan returned to City B. The plane passed through the clouds. Chen Jianan stood near the porthole in a daze. For more than ten years, no one told him that he was bought back.

Including Chen Mao.

Even though he worked for Chen Mao for two years and hung out with him for so long, Chen Mao never mentioned this matter.Even if he was sold to Xishui Village as soon as he was born, Chen Mao should remember things at that time, but Chen Mao never mentioned it.

The more Chen Jianan thought about it, the more aggrieved and bewildered he felt, why, why could he watch such a thing happen but keep silent?Why is everyone willing to watch a child who should not belong here grow up miserable?