thorn

Just after midnight on December 12st, Yun Xiang was overwhelmed by a barrage in his live broadcast room:

[Hurry up and check out the latest Aite on your Weibo! 】

[Hurry up and check out the latest Aite on your Weibo! 】

[Hurry up and check out the latest Aite on your Weibo! 】

According to Yun Xiang's words, he logged on to the small account to view his Weibo under the pseudonym Yun Luoti. The account "Yun Luoti" is not usually used by him, but is hosted by someone from the company, and all the posts are related to work. The latest Aityun's cry is a video posted by a user named "Wu Le".

When Yun Xiang saw the word Wu Le, he suddenly felt something. When he clicked on it, he saw the girl who was guarding outside his mother's ward when he went to the hospital not long ago to sign the consent form.Yun Xiang didn't dare to approach her because he saw her and was afraid that she was Wuyue, so he finally chose to give up signing the consent form.

Wuyue in the video looks cramped, and her appearance in black-rimmed glasses is even more childish.This is a picture-like, very soft face, with the hair of a girl in high school combed, and the texture of her voice is very special, it is a waxy, smoky voice.

Wu Yue said to the camera:

"I'm sorry this is the first time I've recorded a video for myself. I've tried several times, but I'm still nervous. I made this video because according to the exchange, it's my turn to tell my secret.

When I was young, I grew up with my cousin at my grandma’s parents. When I was five or six years old, I can’t remember the exact age. I just remember that my cousin started to let me cooperate with him to do some strange things. I didn't understand what it was at the time.This kind of thing continued until I was in junior high school and had my first period. My mother said that I would be an adult from now on, and I could no longer sleep with my cousin, and it stopped after we slept separately.I didn't know the exact definition of what my cousin did to me was molestation until I was in high school.

I don't have the experience of first kiss, first touch by a loved one, because these were all taken up by my cousin when I was a child who didn't understand anything.I was raped throughout elementary school plus a period of time before elementary school and a period of time after entering junior high school. During such a long period of nearly ten years, I have never told anyone or asked for help. The reason is very simple, because I don’t know that What is it, I don’t know if it’s a crime, even if I were given a chance to say it, I can’t describe my cousin’s behavior to me as a child, no one has ever taught me how to protect myself.

Once on the bed, my cousin put his hand into my pants, and was caught by my grandma who opened the door and came in. She scolded me severely, and even my cousin and I were together.Grandma not only didn't help me at that time, but also made me more afraid of adults, let alone say anything to them.Afterwards my cousin would say 'You have to watch for me, you can't let the adults find out, or you will scold you', I would help him not to be found by the adults when he did those things to me, and I became an accomplice without knowing it , to help him commit a crime.

We grow up in such a social environment, and we don’t allow a single word about *, which makes children do not even understand the most basic safety knowledge. Like me, they are violated under the eyes of their parents and teachers, but the parents are still unaware. I don't know.When I grow up, the matter of being raped has passed the legal retrospective period, and there is no evidence left. Based on my one-sided words, my cousin will not admit it, and others will call me a liar and a lie.Even if it can be proved that the thing about my cousin *me is true, according to the current social ethics, my reputation will be completely ruined. Everyone knows that I am a dirty girl, and no one will dare to talk to me anymore.

I can't tell when I became a clean freak. There is always a voice in my heart telling me that the things I touch are dirty, my body is dirty and my hands are dirty, so I have to wash them.Later, I learned that many people who have been sexually assaulted will suffer from cleanliness. I don’t know that they are different from what I think. They always want to wash away the shadow of the person left in their hearts by constantly cleaning their appearance.When my cleanliness was at its worst, I had to soak in the bathtub for two or three hours every night, washing off a layer of skin before I was willing to come out.Because of over-cleaning, my hands are always dry, cracked, and then infected and inflamed, so I keep healing ointments at home all year round.

I'm telling you this secret now, not to make my cousin punished by law, but to tell you that it's not us who are at fault, but those people and criminals.When the victim can no longer hold up his head because of being violated, and everyone in society blames the victim instead of the criminal, and even the victim himself takes the initiative to help the criminal cover up the crime because of fear, and help the criminal persecute himself, then this crime It was truly a complete success.

I used to hide the fact that I was raped. I helped my cousin and persecuted myself.From now on, if I say it out, it is my cousin who should be punished, I am the one who should be relieved, and I can help other people who have had the same experience as me.I would say please stop punishing ourselves for the sins of others.

I don't want to let the psychological problems of cleanliness caused by being raped be borne by me alone. I want to ask for help, and I want you to help me.I think in the future we can all stop our self-loathing behavior and the constant fear of being found out that others have done us a disgrace.

I speak out, law and justice are here, it is not me who is disgraced, but the criminal.

Give me an address and let me go and see you, okay? "