original love

Chen Shen was very efficient. It took only one week to find several high-end residential areas with excellent apartment types and excellent locations for reference. After the two of them reviewed and finalized, they began to prepare for the move.

Yi Xiao's residence is not limited to this one, with a lot of scattered things but he is not in a hurry to move them all there. Chen Anhua is different. After returning to China, all his belongings are placed in this rented house.

One day Chen Shen asked him on WeChat, "Dr. Chen is usually busy. If necessary, I can find someone to pack it first." After Chen Anhua saw it, he declined without hesitation.

Recently, because of happiness, Yi Xiao came home early, as if he was looking forward to welcoming the newlyweds. He not only went out with Anhua every morning, but also came back early in the evening to make dinner, sticking to his side from time to time and saying: I'm so excited about moving to a new house, and when we get married tomorrow, I'm probably so excited that I don't need to sleep a month in advance."

And when An Hua listened to these words with a smile, he restrained his anxiety in his heart.One day, when the two of them were watching a movie just released on the sofa, Chen Anhua looked absently at the two-meter-two big bed through the bedroom door. Get rid of the stuff in space... that's all the secrets he's been hiding for years.

Because Yi Xiao goes home earlier than him every day recently, so he has no chance to be alone at all. One day he even pretended to ask casually, "Why don't you go on a business trip recently", and Yi Xiao told him that Qin's core business is now concentrated In Beijing and Shanghai, his brother-in-law was in charge of Shanghai. After speaking, he deliberately leaned over to him to claim credit and said, "I won this!"

As the moving date approached, Chen Anhua's uneasiness became more and more intense. He regretted that he hadn't thought carefully before speaking about the move. Chen Anhua was even thinking that if Yi Xiao returned so early these two days, no matter how busy he was, he would still be with him. The hospital asked for half a day off to deal with this matter.

As if God favored his prayer, after answering a phone call in the kitchen, Yi Xiao walked up to An Hua with a frown and said helplessly, "There is a difficult matter over there in Shanghai, I may have to go for two days."

Chen Anhua was flipping through "The Lancet". After hearing this sentence, he suppressed the joy in his heart. It took two seconds before he raised his head and asked, "Are you going to walk for two days?" '

"Yeah," Yi Xiao sighed and sat next to Anhua, "I'm going to move the day after tomorrow, and there's such a thing..." Then he took Anhua's shoulders apologetically and said, "I'm sorry, it's not special. If you are in a hurry, my uncle will not let me go, but our moving day may be delayed."

Chen Anhua raised his hand to hold Yi Xiao's hand on his shoulder, turned his head and looked at Yi Xiao with a smile: "It's not bad for a day or two, you can work there with peace of mind, and you can't get out of the house, so why worry?" '

"You are not in a hurry, I am in a hurry!" Speaking of this, Yi Xiao became excited: "You see, how many people have lived in this house, and our bed, I have the biggest opinion on it, you know, always Not to mention the creaking sound, it is soft and uncomfortable at all. You have to change it a few times before and you find it troublesome and disagree. You say that you are a doctor, how can you tolerate living in someone else’s bed? Even if you rent a house, it’s okay I should change to a new, more comfortable bed, so I am just waiting, I just want to stretch and exercise for hundreds of rounds on our marriage bed!"

Anhua held back his laughter, took his hands off his shoulders, stood up and said, "It's hard for you to do a good job in the company, and you only think about this every day." '

"I'm a man, of course I would think about this!" Yi Xiao loudly defended himself to find a reason.

'I'm a man too, okay? '

After Yi Xiao leaned in and kissed An Hua, he said, "You are a man, yes, but I am a man's man."

After a while, Yi Xiao put his forehead against Anhua's and said, "Don't miss me too much, just two days."

An Hua couldn't help but chuckled before saying, "I'll fight for it." '

……

Since there was a major operation yesterday and the patient had to wait for the observation period, it was already late at night when it ended, and Chen Anhua was not at ease and did not go home. So after work, Chen Anhua talked to the director and hurried home.

After the two full cartons were brought out, Chen Anhua looked at the things on the ground with a sense of loss, whether he was going to find a waste station to throw them away or burn them in a place where no one was around. He stared at these things as if he saw himself His youth...he wrote to Chen Yixiao when he was abroad, thousands of letters that he never thought of sending.

When I returned to China, I was thinking about whether to throw these things in Canada, but at that time, they were full of nostalgia for Chen Yixiao, and he was reluctant to let go, so he took them back by accident. , These feelings are all that support his spiritual world, but he never thought that one day they would become his burden.

When Yi Xiao came back tomorrow, he was going to move by the weekend. Chen Anhua wanted to gather other things together and then deal with the two boxes of letters, but he didn't expect that just after nine o'clock, the hospital would inform him to go back immediately, saying that the patient who underwent surgery yesterday had chest pains. The infected heart rate is very unstable and has been transferred to the ICU.

Putting down the clothes he was sorting, Chen Anhua picked up the key and rushed out. The patient was a little girl with congenital heart disease who had just turned eight years old. Chen Anhua put in more energy and patience than ordinary patients. What I have learned wants to save this child's life.

After three hours of rescue, the little girl's heart rate finally stabilized and she was out of danger for the time being. Looking at the parents who were crying with joy, Chen Anhua wiped the sweat from his forehead slightly tired, thinking that he was finally rescued.Before leaving, he looked back at the cute little girl wearing an oxygen mask through the glass window of the ICU, and prayed for her in his heart. This is all I can do, the rest is up to you, you must survive .

……

Dragging his tired feet from the parking lot to the community, he habitually looked up at the house where he lived, and his steps froze there for a moment. Did you not turn off the lights just now?Still got it wrong?After confirming again that it was his own room, Chen Anhua's heart stopped beating twice...

When he realized that it was the most feared possibility, he raised his feet and rushed towards home as fast as he could. He told himself not to worry, it couldn't be Yi Xiao, and he clearly said that he would only come back tomorrow night, it must be just I was too impatient just now and forgot to turn off the light.

However, the fantasy was shattered the moment the elevator door opened, because the light of the room leaked out through the crack of the door, and cold sweat instantly covered his whole body. Chen Anhua himself didn't realize the silent words that blurted out, "Impossible... ...'

Almost moving to the door, Chen Anhua tremblingly put his hand on the doorknob. The last prayer in his heart was that maybe Yi Xiao didn't open it to take a look, maybe he just asked Chen Shen to pack things in advance... God really can't always Taking care of the same person, when the door was slowly opened, Chen Anhua's breathing stopped at that moment. He couldn't believe what he saw in front of him. Yi Xiao was sitting on the ground with his back to him, and what was scattered all over the place was the full That thousand secrets.

After hearing the sound of the door being opened for a long time, Yi Xiao slowly turned his head and said in a hoarse voice: "The date of moving is calculated by someone, I don't want to miss it, so I came back early..." Yi Xiao held the palm of his hand Standing up heavily on his knees, he said with his back to Anhua: "Just now I thought, even if there is a letter here that is addressed to me, I will pretend that I haven't read it..."

Yi Xiao took a deep breath, and after gathering a lot of strength, he turned around and looked at Chen Anhua, who was completely frozen at the door, and said word by word: "If there is an award for fool of the century, it will probably be awarded to me, right? I actually thought that you went abroad suddenly a few years ago because I hurt you, that you didn't let me go for so many years, but..."

The only voice in the room suddenly choked with sobs. After Yi Xiao frowned and took a deep breath, he still trembled and said the things that had been put together from just now: "It's actually my own sentimentality and wishful thinking... 3 On February 28th, the first time between the two of us, you should remember it better than me, because that day was Chen Yixiao's wedding day, right, I didn't remember that time when I saw the couple having dinner... so you At that time, you came to me because you were stimulated, and you couldn't bear Chen Yixiao's marriage, so you wanted to find someone to have sex with, isn't that right?"

"After you came back, Zhou Jinyu kept telling me that you didn't have me in your heart. I still didn't believe it. How could I write my name over and over again in the notebook without me? YX, Yi Xiao, Yi Xiao, how the hell would you know?" Such a coincidence! Afterwards, you didn’t plan to do anything to me, did you? Because you knew that Chen Yixiao was going to be your father, you were completely useless, and there happened to be a stupid pug next to you, so empty that you slept with me Yes, it’s better to have someone by your side than to be alone, huh? Chen Anhua? You’re right in thinking so! Am I right?”

Yi Xiao masochistically narrates one thing that has been connected in series from the very beginning, and the scenes are flashing in front of his eyes like a revolving lantern. When Chen Anhua looks at Chen Yixiao, his eyes are too affectionate, and he always smiles at Chen Yixiao ...How could he be so stupid? Zhou Jinyu reminded him, even Gangzi who met him once reminded him, how could he be so confident that Chen Anhua, who never made any promises to him, loved him?

Chen Anhua finally regained his senses from the panic, he rushed up like crazy and grabbed Yi Xiao's arm desperately and explained: "It's not like this, it's not what you think, it was true at first, but then I really like you , wanting to be with you is true, you believe me..."

But no matter how he shakes Yi Xiao's arm, how he gestures with his lips, Yi Xiao hangs his head to the ground in despair. Chen Anhua is a little stunned for a moment, he has never seen someone who always smiles at him Showing such gloomy eyes, it seems that all emotions are drawn up like the curtain at the end of the performance.

Chen Anhua still tried his best to explain, in order to let Yi Xiao look at him, he even turned his body sideways, bent down following Yi Xiao's line of sight in an awkward posture, and finally straightened Yi Xiao's face, forcing the two of them Look straight in the face.However, when Yi Xiao finally raised his head to meet Anhua's eyes, Chen Anhua stopped explaining at that moment, because he saw Yi Xiao's tears bursting like a dike...

A certain place in his heart was throbbed, and the pain spread along Anhua's blood vessels and meridians, like a steel wire strangling his whole heart into pain. Someone he loved was hurt.

You can't let everything go on like this, there must be a chance to make up for it...Suddenly thought of something, Chen Anhua turned around and ran to the desk, opened the drawer and took out the ring that he was about to wear a long time ago, as if grasping the last ray of hope He hurriedly raised the ring in front of Yi Xiao and said, "Get married, shall we get married? Those are all things in the past. Believe me, I really like you, I really love you. Didn't you always want to get married?" Well, we'll get married tomorrow, or... Now, we'll fly today, wherever we want, we'll get married!Shall we get married? '

An Hua hurriedly expressed this sentence with hand and mouth, anyway, this person has been embedded in his life, the two of them are already so good, how could they give up easily, he can use the rest of his life to make up for Yi Xiao to forgive him, there must be time.

But Yi Xiao just stared silently at the ring in Anhua's hand, and this ring that had been attached to his chest for a long time was now like a proof of how stupid he was to laugh at himself, he slowly shifted his gaze, and finally returned his gaze to Jean He has been deeply obsessed with the face for a year, why didn't he see through it, maybe he didn't live in this person's heart even for a second.

As if putting all his eggs in one basket, Yi Xiao said lightly: "Then let me ask you, can you swear that you never thought of Chen Yixiao when you were with me?"

Chen Anhua's hand that stopped in mid-air suddenly trembled, but then he immediately calmed himself down, and then shook his head firmly. There can only be one correct answer to this question, and this may be the last straw to catch this person , is the last chance to keep someone by his side, so he hurriedly replied, 'No'.

With a sound of "bang", Yi Xiao heard the sound of his heart pounding heavily, carrying his last hope, the last layer of man's dignity, into the abyss.

Yi Xiao's icy hands slowly touched this overly delicate face, painful light shone in the depths of his compressed pupils, and after a while he said dumbly: "Chen Anhua, you lied to me again, do you know, don't you Never look me in the eye when telling the truth..."

Finally, Yi Xiao's hand hangs down feebly, he no longer shed tears, replaced by a desperate self-deprecating laugh: "It's been so long, how ridiculous! I thought I was very important to you, so it turns out It's just a fucking substitute, it's really retribution, you don't know, because when I was with others before, I always thought of you..."

Even if he forcibly suppressed it, it was difficult to restrain the painful expression from Yi Xiao's eyes. He frowned and suppressed tears and looked at Chen Anhua and said, "But Chen Anhua, if I knew that you just wanted a bed partner, just tell me, let's Why bother so much, what you got must be more than just this broken ring!"

After saying this, before Anhua could react, Yi Xiao snatched the ring from Anhua's hand, turned around and opened the window, and threw it down the window on the 17th floor.

Chen Anhua rushed to the balcony like crazy, he wanted to see which direction the ring was thrown, and whether he could find it later, as if as long as he found it, he could travel back in time to today, and everything had time to start again, but Downstairs was pitch black, except for a piece of dark green and gray lawn, nothing could be seen...

As soon as the wind came in, it made the room full of letter paper even more messy.And when there is a vacancy in the heart, if love fills up the injustice, you can only fill it with hatred.

Yi Xiao pretended to be indifferent and said: "However, this year is not a loss. Seeing that we have a tacit understanding in bed, this debt will be eliminated, but from now on..." His voice suddenly changed Sternly, "Don't let me see you again!" After saying that, he turned and walked towards the door.

Ignoring the cruel words that hurt people, Chen Anhua turned around again and rushed forward to hug Yi Xiao to keep him, but the moment he first touched him, Yi Xiao pushed him back fiercely as if disgusted.The side of his waist just hit the hard table corner, and Chen Anhua immediately frowned because of the pain.

Yi Xiao opened his eyes and turned around, turned his back to Chen Anhua and finally said coldly: "Didn't you mention breaking up before? In fact, it doesn't matter to you except Chen Yixiao. That's up to you, but Just stop disgusting me!"

When the door was slammed shut, the strong vibration caused the glazed vases at the door to fall to the ground. In the messy room, Chen Anhua stood there like a clay sculpture and wood carving. The clock on the wall passed slowly. Turned around a few times, but to him, time seemed to stand still forever at that moment.

……

When Yi Xiao came downstairs in a hurry, a gust of cold wind blew down his tears again.He faced the wind and tried to wipe away his tears, but the tears still rushed out like a struggle. He could only hide most of his face behind his palms, but even so he couldn't restrain the violent shaking of his shoulders. After a while, In the darkness, there was a man crying intermittently, and Yi Xiao realized that the voice was actually made by himself.

Why is life always like this, when you think that happiness is at its limit, this kind of reversal without warning occurs, and when you get carried away, it shows you the ugliest side, just like your mother when you were a child, like the one who was thinking but never Toys I've seen...

It turns out that everything is fake, but now that I think about it, all the happiness has become irony. It is just like a clay pot built on a breakwater, and it will fall apart with a slight push. I knew that it would be such a painful price to pay for sincerity. I would rather start I don’t want it anymore, what will I get in the end if I don’t leave any room for it, the end of happiness I once thought is just a deceptive illusion of a mirage...

After an unknown amount of time, the person in the wind finally stopped crying, Yi Xiao wiped away the last tears on his face, moved his footsteps stubbornly, and approached the boundless night.

……