heart beating

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The fire trees and silver flowers on the streets of Tokyo in winter are full of the atmosphere of Christmas.Xueman shuttled through the crowd, holding her hands to her lips and exhaling.She went back to the hotel after the game yesterday, took off her make-up, and stayed up all night to do her homework. She just wanted to take that bastard to eat, drink, and have fun during the last few days in Japan.But everything was in vain again, she actually left again when she needed her most, especially she temporarily replaced "Understand Love" in order to sing a song she could understand to witness the first time they met The "tequila".When a person is with us, we will not know when and where we parted from her.But Xueman has felt that the difference between Xiaochi and Xiaochi lies in a certain moment several times.

Yinchi searched outside for a long time, and finally saw Xueman's back in the crowd of people.The two of them took the same pose, put their hands in their pockets, stepped on the snow, and walked one after the other.

Unknowingly walking into a small street away from the crowd, a crisp silver bell-like voice caught Xueman's ears.Looking at the reputation, in the glass window, a music box made of a crystal piano and a crystal dancer is spinning, which is very beautiful, and the melody it emits is "Castle in the Sky" - ethereal and compassionate.

Kelly's second Chinese-Japanese adaptation song is this "Castle in the Sky".Koike has a habit of writing lyrics. He likes to write the direction of the copy according to his own feelings, and then slowly compose the lyrics with the composition.That day, at her desk, Xueman saw "Castle in the Sky" that hadn't been written yet:

"Is there any secret in this world, hidden deep in a place that no one knows, living the loneliness of this life silently. Our loneliness is like a city floating in the sky, as if it is a secret, but we can't tell it. We are crowded and breathing , looking at the sky. How many unknown secrets in this world are as lonely as ourselves? Please let me meet that secret, just like one kind of loneliness embraces another kind of loneliness. In the moment of physical contact, understand and be understood. The city in the sky floating among the clouds, you, like me, are crowded, but no one knows... Maybe everyone saw the shadow of the city in the sky the moment they looked up, bowed their heads, but I will never find my destination. The grass becomes familiar in an instant, it is no longer a landscape in my eyes, it is my habitat. Those webs weaved by you and me suddenly split, allowing me to slip into the sky and Between the land, get close to the birds and chat with the flowers. I, the flowers, the birds, and the city in the sky are all a secret in the world, but it’s a pity that we don’t listen to each other..."

Therefore, she hides deep secrets in her heart.I don't understand, will she blame me?

The glass reflected Yinchi's face behind her, she wrapped the scarf around Xueman's neck, leaned over her body, and said, "It's so cold, don't run so far, what should I do if I can't find you?" Looking back at the rotating crystal box, "So it's this song. Do you like "Laputa in the Sky"?" Xue Man shook her head.Seeing her eyes red from crying and nose red from freezing, Yinchi looked around. "Follow me." He pulled Xueman towards a coffee vending machine 50 meters away.

"This season, all the coffee machines on the streets of Japan serve hot drinks." He said, throwing in a few coins. With a bang, a can of coffee rolled down. "Wait." Xueman was about to reach out to take it, but was stopped by Yinchi. "This is very hot, I'll get it." As he said that, he bent down and put his hand into the delivery port, but the jar seemed to be stuck, and it wouldn't work even after changing several angles.

"Is it stuck?" Xueman wanted to squat down to help her, but Yinchi said, "It's almost ready." So, he pulled hard and finally took out the can.But his hands were hot red.Seeing this, Xueman instinctively wanted to help her take it away, but she didn't expect the coffee to be so hot, it was too hot for human hands, and one fell to the ground without holding it.

Yin Chi just wanted to help her pick it up.Xueman said: "Xiaochi, there's no need." He grabbed her right hand, with the palm facing up, and it was all red.Xueman said: "Doesn't it hurt you?" "How could it not hurt? Look at the skin is broken and blistered. Why do you want to hurt yourself?" Yinchi broke free immediately, covered his palm with his sleeve, and carried it behind his back.

"Xiaochi, how can I not like the songs you wrote? But now I know that behind a good song are the producer's scars. I used to appreciate Lin Xi's lyrics, and you said that they were all unbearable weights in his life. So, a similar situation is like you now. How do you want me to understand you? I feel sorry for your state. I can let you go to Anna, forgive you for not coming to my concert, or even ignore you Don't care about our life anymore. But, I can't make you happy, I'm acting forbearance with someone I love the most. Xiaochi, we met too quickly, kissed too quickly, and had sex too quickly. Then, again Too quickly not knowing how to love each other again."

You were not there when I needed you most.The hospitality after the heart is cold is like a cotton-padded jacket in summer and a cattail fan in winter.It's all meaningless.

Xueman turned around again, and this time disappeared at the end of the street as if in a lifetime.Yinchi stopped chasing him.Every chase seems like an endless loop."Heart is beating" on the coaster, whiskey coffee, midnight noise, tequila, lemon cream, yesterday once more, curry beef noodles, octopus balls, milk froth on the lips, "angel's spell", wall Graffiti on the Internet, Mediterranean style, ice packs for toothache, heavy snow in Beijing, Swarovski crystals, kisses under street lights, jealousy in Naples, "Love is Simple", jerk, madman, I love you...all these colorful memories , reciprocating in my mind... a segment has become a black and white film, no longer flowing, but it is unforgettable.

Later, with Henry's help, Xueman returned to Guangzhou ahead of schedule.It took her half a month to sort out her emotions, cry and tidy up everything in the house.Due to the different musical concepts, she no longer renewed her contract with Meka and decided to go north to develop musicals.Before departure, I had been back from Japan for a month.After that day, she never saw Yinchi again.They lost touch.

Xueman finally flipped through the music score on the guitar stand, and put two pages of paper in between.One page is the piano accompaniment and the other page is the lyrics.In the end, she left her house key on the tea table and left with the box.Xiaochi, for us later, happiness is no longer a love song, not as simple as the song "Love is Simple".However, no one is an island in this world, and there will always be people who will smile at you in the future.

Chapter 45 If Everything Is a Bubble

Yinchi has never hated himself so much for a moment, so much that he doesn't even want to see a pore on his body.She felt that she was terrified. It should be heartbreaking at this moment. The only person she cared about had left because of her hopeless attitude.But she was so numb that she couldn't even feel the pain in her heart, she just wanted to end all this as soon as possible.Enough is enough.

During the year, she played a different role every day with poor acting skills.Serious and serious in front of artists, relaxed and natural in front of friends, doing all the things that can be done in front of Xueman.She believed that she could handle all the emotions that popped up, but she was depressed day after day and became more and more overwhelmed.She forgot how many nights, after the pain of self-harm disappeared, she sat on the ground and stared at her watch in a daze.She didn't want to do anything, not even to hear a sound.

She was tired, fed up with the roles she played.Mingming really wants to find an empty and deserted place to vent his heart out, and wants to rush into the endless darkness regardless, but he can only keep everything normal in vain.It's not that she can't see other people's caring eyes, it's just that those eyes make her suffer a lot.Like a wounded wild animal, it can run to a cave to hide and lick its wound slowly, and maybe it can gradually enjoy the mood of loneliness.But once it is greeted with care, it will not work.

She knew that she was probably sick, but she couldn't answer what the source of the disease was and when it started.Did it start with the indifference of the parents?The unexpected death of a good friend begins? Anna's controlled life begins?Or did it start with the boss's suicide?However, it doesn't matter anymore.The important thing is that at the moment she feels relaxed, more relaxed than ever.I can finally be desperate, and no one will feel sad because of myself.