Shadow of great britain

Dear Arthur:

How are you doing lately? By the way, I haven’t written to you for a while. The last time Charles sent a message back, I was still immersed in the massacre of the Indians by the Argentine butcher Rosas and could not extricate myself for a long time. Therefore, when Charles asked me if I wanted to write a letter, I did not ask him to hand over my letter to the merchant ship bound for Britain.

But that doesn't mean I've forgotten you. Of course I still remember you bad boys who were popular and popular in London. Attend various banquet salons of high society, hang out with young and beautiful girls, taste various exotic foods from all over the world, and drink a variety of high-end wines imported from France.

You must be having a great time, so I don’t intend to disturb your interest at that time. I, Elder Carter, am not a guy who doesn't understand amorous feelings. Although I live like a rat nesting in the cabin all day long, I still have to behave cheerfully. This world is already pretty fucked up, why do I still have to stick my butt out to cater to him? Hahaha!

Arthur, when you see this, you must understand how I feel now. Yes, I have gotten over my depression. Fuck Rosas, fuck the Argentines. Of course, I don’t mean to insult all Argentine people, but those guys who are willing to act as his executioners.

Well... As for why I wrote this letter to you on a whim today... Haha, don't laugh at me when I say it, Arthur. It was because Alexander told me in his letter that he said you were dead. You first had someone shot you in Liverpool, and then you had your heart shot through under the Tower of London.

I have to say that this fat man who came from France is not looking forward to your good at all, and his character cannot be put on the table. I have to admit that his story is very well written, and the scenes and details are very realistic, but after all, it is an absurd novel without any basis, and I will not believe his nonsense.

However, from the fat man's words, I can still read that you may have been in a very low mood recently. Maybe it was because someone spilled beer all over me when I was trying to pick up a girl? Come on, man, why do you care about this little thing? Women are everywhere, and it doesn’t take that long to start a true relationship again.

But I thought about it carefully, and you don’t seem like a guy who would worry about picking up girls. Is it because your recent work has not gone well? Got suppressed by that old guy Luo Wan again? If that's the case, Arthur, you have yourself to blame.

I told you before that you would come on board with me to see the beautiful and gorgeous scenery around the world, meet a few exotic beauties, and also see dolphins and sharks, well... although these two species are also Nothing to see.

Of course, circumnavigation is not without its merits. For example, on our trip to Argentina, although we encountered a lot of unpleasantness on the road, looking back now, happy times still account for the majority.

The culture and people of South America are so crazy. Do you know the gauchos here? They are a type of Indian, and all of them are masters of horse training. No matter how wild the horse is, if it comes into their hands, it will be tamed in less than a week.

Here, the horse must learn to run at full speed and stop abruptly when encountering any unexpected situation before it is completely tamed. According to their standards, one rides a horse towards the wall with all its strength, then tightens the reins and orders the horse to raise its front legs to stop. At this time, the horse's hoofs must just hit the wall to be considered a complete training success.

I can guarantee you that if you take any one of these Gauchos to participate in the Derby equestrian competition, they will easily come out on top. However, the people here have another quirk when it comes to horse training, that is, they think training and riding a mare is ridiculous.

But in Europe, we usually think that stallions are difficult to control if they are not gelded, but after they are gelded and become eunuchs, their running ability is not as good as before. So it is better to ride a female horse, because they are docile and their running speed is not slow.

But I have to admit that those famous people usually like to take risks and ride bad-tempered stallions, such as the stallion 'Copenhagen' that carried the Duke of Wellington to Waterloo for 17 consecutive hours. Although the newspapers had made great reports about this famous horse with great achievements in battle, I heard some people say that this bad-tempered guy almost kicked the Duke's head off at the end of the battle. Fortunately he failed in the end, otherwise, I suggest that the French should elect him as king.

Of course, as the Duke of Wellington's biggest rival, Napoleon also liked such bad-tempered horses, such as the gray purebred Arabian horse 'Virgil' given to him by the Ottoman Sultan, which he rode when he retreated from Russia. British Limousin horse, chestnut 'Watley'. However, during the Battle of Waterloo, he still chose the safest guy. He was riding a pure white mare named 'Desiree' after his first love.

But no matter what Napoleon thought, in the minds of the Gauchos, they would never ride a mare, but would only use the mare to harvest wheat and slaughter it for skin. Here a complete horsehide sold for only five dollars, which was about half a crown, or a quarter of a pound.

A local butcher proudly told me that he could kill twenty-two horses in one day, and at most, fifty horses could be killed and skinned in one day. But I think he was bragging, because it was a lot of work, and generally speaking, skinning and drying fifteen or six horses would be considered a pretty good day.

But anyway, in the past six months, I have had the opportunity to get a glimpse of the character of the local residents through my contact with them. Gauchos, or country people, are generally of much better character than those who live in towns.

Although they may sometimes make you feel uncomfortable, that is actually due to their helpful, polite and hospitable nature. Not once did I experience any rudeness or indifference. They are gentle, respect themselves and their country, and are full of energy and courage.

But on the other hand, robberies and bloodshed occur too frequently. The custom of carrying a knife is the main reason for the latter. Too many people have lost their lives due to trivial quarrels, and quarrels usually develop into fights. Every time they fight, they try to leave scars on each other's faces. The knife is always aimed at the nose and eyes. This has happened to many people's faces. You can see the deep and ugly scars all over his body.

Robbery was an inevitable consequence of widespread gambling, drunkenness and extreme laziness. When I was in Mercedes, I asked two poor guys why they didn't have jobs. One of the guys told me solemnly that the days were too long for him, and another said there was no job because he was too poor.

The words of these two guys immediately amused me. Only then did I realize that it is difficult for people to be diligent in a situation with beautiful scenery, many horses, and abundant food. In addition, there are so many festivals here. Although I don’t hate this, because many festivals mean there are reasons to celebrate every day, but I have to say that this also leads to another one or two months of the year being wasted. .

In addition, the efficiency of the police and law enforcement here is at a very low level, completely inferior to Scotland Yard, where you are the bad guy. I have no doubt that if you arrived at this place, you would immediately be appointed as the highest security officer in the area.

Here, if a poor man is caught killing someone, he will be locked up or even killed on the spot. But if it's a rich man, and he happens to have friends, then you know, he doesn't have to worry about the serious consequences of killing someone.

The strangest thing is that respected local residents will help the murderer escape. They seem to believe that crime is committed against the government, not against ordinary people. The traveler has no protection but his own weapons. Therefore, if you want to travel to South America one day, it is absolutely necessary to carry weapons with you.

The educated upper classes in the city may have moral qualities that are comparable to, or even slightly inferior to, the Gauchos, but I think they are also tainted with many vices that the Gauchos definitely do not possess. Intemperate dissoluteness, disdain for religion and gross corruption were far from isolated.

Before coming to South America, I thought Britain was bad enough, but compared with here, Britain seemed like a kingdom of heaven, and the moral standards of officialdom in Argentina and Chile were comparable to the sewage outfalls of the Thames River.

From what I've seen, all public officials here can be bribed. Yes, I said all of them. Because I discovered that the person in charge of the post office here was selling counterfeit legal tender of the government, and the provincial ministers and the prime minister were openly appropriating the country's resources and land.

Every law enforcement process is mixed with more or less monetary transactions, so people here never expect justice and fairness. I met a British businessman in Montevideo, and he told me an interesting anecdote that happened when he first arrived here.

He had just arrived here and did not understand the local situation, so he was deceived when doing business. Following the usual British thinking, he consulted a lawyer to find out how he should sue the scammer, but the lawyer told him to just give the judge some money.

When he went to see the chief judge, he didn't understand the customs here. When he walked into the office, his legs were shaking with fear. He stuttered and stated the case, and then said: "Sir, please accept these two hundred yuan. I hope you can catch the person who deceived me before a certain time. I know it is illegal, but this is what my lawyer XXX asked me to do."

The justice smiled and acquiesced to the request, and politely thanked him for the money. As a result, before the businessman returned home, someone came to inform him that the guy who deceived him had been thrown into prison.

Tsk tsk tsk, in a country, even those high-ranking leaders are so unprincipled, while those officials with lower positions than them receive extremely meager salaries and are as restless as their chiefs. But under such an environment, people think that democratic government can succeed. This is simply ridiculous.

Of course, my impression of South America wasn't always so bad. When you meet the people of these countries for the first time, you will notice two or three characteristics that stand out in particular. People from all walks of life are polite and dignified. Ladies dress in a very tasteful way. People from all walks of life treat each other equally. They are not as hierarchical as Britain.

While we were resting on the banks of the Colorado River, several humble shopkeepers said that they often dined at the same table with General Rosas, who was stationed nearby. In Puerto Blanca, a major's son made a living by rolling cigars. He wanted to accompany us to Buenos Aires and said he could be a guide or a servant.

However, his father opposed his son's decision, not because he felt ashamed to be a guide and servant, but because he was worried that we would encounter many dangers along the way. Many officers here can neither read nor write, but they are all equal in social situations and there is no discrimination against illiterate people like in Britain.

In the parliament of Entre Rios, there are only six members, and one of them does not do any big business, he just opens a small grocery store that can be seen everywhere. But he doesn't seem to be looked down upon by other lawmakers because of his small fortune. Perhaps these situations seem strange to us Britons, but this is what emerging countries have in common. They lack a gentleman class with professional knowledge, and therefore do not have a too deep-rooted concept of class.

Yes, I actually don’t hate these South American countries, I even envy them in some places. Most of them had just won independence from their sovereign Spain, so extreme liberalism prevailed here, tolerance of foreign religions, emphasis on education, freedom of the press, and convenience for all foreigners, especially those of us who have something to do with science. people whose enthusiasm often moves us.

The elderly naturally have their advantages, because they usually have a lot of experience and have eaten more salt than we have seen sand, so they usually act very steadily. But young people also have the courage of young people. We really don’t understand anything, but so what? We can do whatever we want. Maybe some things are really dangerous, but if there are more people trying, there will always be one or two who are lucky enough to succeed.

This description is also very appropriate for the country. People who have spent a lifetime in Britain will definitely not be able to imagine how the people in South America live. Everything here is simply too crazy for them, the endless prairie, countless cattle and sheep, and chunks of barbecue, the Gauchos who treat you as friends when they meet, and the law in name only. system, as well as robbers and robbers who may appear from anywhere at any time.

Alas! This is the wonderful South America, with its crazy people and wild animals. It only takes one day for British gentlemen to have their fashionable breeches ripped apart by wild horses, and ladies to faint a hundred and eighty times a day. . Of course, what I like most is not only these, but also... haha, I mean the charming local girls, I love them.

Of course, the premise of love is that they had better not provoke a skunk recently. Arthur, believe me, when even the most loyal hunting dog is ordered to chase it, as soon as it smells a few drops of skunk oil, its courage will disappear without a trace, and what will follow will follow. It was severe nausea, vomiting, and tears, and the smell could be smelled even from a mile away. Therefore, I can say with absolute certainty that all animals in South America are happy to give way to skunks.

Arthur, you see, even though you are very knowledgeable and you are the most outstanding history graduate of our University in London, there are still many things in this world that you don't know. You should get out of this shit basin of Britain and take a good trip around the world, otherwise even an ignorant guy like me will surpass you.

Haha, I'm joking, don't take it seriously. I can never surpass you in erudition because I have devoted my life's talents to the study of women. By the way, Arthur, have you ever had an in-depth communication with any lady you like?

Uh...I don't want to pry into your privacy. I don't have any hobbies in that area. You know, I'm an aboveboard guy. But... people are always curious, right?

And, and...if you didn't even have any communication and just left so lightly, then... wouldn't it be a pity?

Damn it! What the hell am I talking about? It's all his damn fault, Alexander! This stupid story is so damn true! He can write some novels and scripts, so he can be like this?

When I get back to London, I will definitely shoot him twice and make a few slits in his crotch, because only in this way can I make him understand that there is a damn price to pay for making up random stories!

…

Arthur, will you reply to me? I know you may be in a bad mood, but if you have time, just give me a few words. You can write about anything, from bed, from under the bed, from Scotland Yard, from the editorial board of The Englishman.

If you don't want to write any of this, just draw a picture of Charles's bald head and send it to me. This is the simplest. You only need to draw an arc. There is no need to embellish any messy hair. He will lose it sooner or later anyway. .

However, if... I mean if... if you are not even willing to send this to me, Arthur, I will really have to treat you as dead. But...but I know that's impossible, because you must still be alive. Maybe you are sitting in your office at Scotland Yard right now, patting your belly and laughing as you read my letter to your subordinates.

You think to yourself: "Ha! This kid Elder is so naive. I'm so ashamed that I went to the same university as him. He believes such obvious lies. He would rather believe a Frenchman than anything else." I'm still alive. No wonder this guy was tricked out of a penny by a prostitute in Rio de Janeiro."

Do you think I'll be angry about this?

ha! Then you are wrong!

Arthur, your friend, the noble and brave Mr. Elder Carter, is not such a foolish fellow.

If you want to laugh at me, you better let me know that I'm like a clown. In this case, you will have more fun.

Your University of London alumnus, the companion with whom you have enjoyed high-class dramas, with whom you also insulted the decadent darkness of Britain, the tenant who owes you two weeks' rent, your best friend in this life and the next, who lent you twenty pounds and is still with you today It has not been repaid, and will not be considered for repayment, unless you go to Elder Carter, my collector, in person.