My 26-year-old Female Tenant

  Seeing that my expression was numb and I was still silent for a long time, Mi Cai asked with concern: "Did you feel uncomfortable after drinking too much wine?"

   "A little bit, I feel blocked."

   "No wonder I haven't said a word since just now. Don't drink so much in the future."

  I nodded and didn't say anything more, but the matter about Xiang Chen's setting up a cabinet in Zhuomei just now was brought over.

When I returned to the old house, I became more and more dizzy. I lay on the bed before I had time to wash up. Even if I closed my eyes, I felt that the whole room was spinning. When I opened my eyes, Mi Cai wiped my face with a wet towel.

  I grabbed her hand and said to her: "It's getting late, you should go back and rest early."

   "You drank so much, no one can take care of you. I'll be staying here tonight."

   "I'm fine, you can go back."

   "Zhaoyang, what's wrong with you? You always let me stay here before, now...now we are together, why do you want me to leave?"

At this moment, I am not very capable of thinking, but the alcohol seems to have stimulated my instinct of not wanting to trouble her, and urged me vaguely, saying: "Go back and rest quickly, okay?... Before I met you, I used to talk to you every day." That's how you live, don't you live a good life?"

  Mi Cai didn't speak, I turned over, turned my back to her and didn't speak, I just felt a headache and dizziness, then lost the ability to communicate and fell asleep.

  …

  At night, my stomach began to churn, I stumbled to the bathroom and vomited as if I had exhausted myself, and then my whole body collapsed, leaning against the toilet and sitting on the floor weakly, staring blankly at the opposite sink.

Finally feeling thirsty, I went back to the living room to pick up the teapot and wanted to pour myself a glass of water, but found it was empty, and I didn’t bother to boil a pot, so I took a glass of tap water and drank it down, but gradually woke up under the stimulation of freezing , then remembered some conversations with Mi Cai when he was still conscious.

Under the influence of alcohol, people's words and deeds often express the most true thoughts in their hearts. Therefore, I will let Mi Cai leave without being dominated by consciousness. I don't want to cause her troubles, but I can't remember who she is now. My girlfriend, on the contrary, the better she treats me and accommodates me, the more guilty I feel!

In the wild divergence of my thoughts, I remembered the scene when Jian Wei drove me for a ride in the newly bought Cadillac on that afternoon many years ago, and I felt depressed. I think that at that time, my inferiority complex had already taken root in my heart, and In the past few years, my failure to achieve anything has been like fertilizer, constantly nourishing this small sprout, and eventually it has grown into a towering giant tree, and then firmly dominates my values ​​​​and outlook on love.

  Depressed, he took out a cigarette from the cigarette case on the coffee table and lit it, took a breathless puff, then lay tired on the sofa, habitually staring at the ceiling in a daze.

After smoking a cigarette, I went back to my room, only to find that there was an insulated kettle on the bedside cabinet. It turned out that Mi Cai had prepared hot water for me when she left, but I didn’t I found out, and then went to drink a glass of tap water without temperature in a daze, which was somewhat ironic to me.

  Even when Mi Cai and Mi Cai were in a hostile state, she didn't ignore me, let alone we are a couple now! How could she just walk away, at least she would prepare me a jug of hot water after drinking, but I didn't think about it, my subconscious was full of her beauty, her status, her wealth, Imprisoned in a strange circle, he touched her with his hands, but his heart struggled to escape.

  Human nature is complicated after all. At this moment, I don't quite understand myself, but I am indeed troubled by many negative emotions, so I ask myself: What is the reason that triggers my emotions at this time?

After the ecstasy of being together gradually subsided, the whole person began to return to rationality, and then inevitably used the gap in reality to measure this relationship. During the measurement, I gradually realized that I had learned from the past, and I had really lost the unknown. Fearless courage.

For the next time, I was lying in bed thinking about how to improve myself, which I had to do, but I had no idea at all. It was not until the bell of the Drum Tower rang at 6 o'clock that I realized: No matter how good I am in starting a business Thoughts, without the support of funds, are just fantasies, so the past few hours were just an idiot dreaming an empty dream, so I was even more lost and at a loss.

  …

  With no trace of drowsiness, I got up at seven o'clock, cooked porridge early, put it in a thermos, bought some pastries that Mi Cai loved, and then drove to the community where she lives now.

After a while, I arrived at the destination, parked the car at the gate of the community, and then called Mi Cai. This time, Mi Cai got through the phone very quickly. She yawned. Obviously she was still sleepy because she was caught The phone ringing woke me up, which surprised me because she usually turns off or put her phone on silent when she is taking a break.

   I asked, "Are you still up?"

   "Well, why are you up so early?"

   "I got up when I couldn't fall asleep... Why didn't you turn off your phone when you went to bed today?"

   "Call me for fear that you will feel uncomfortable at night!"

Mi Cai's words made me feel guilty and touched, and after a while of silence, I said to her: "I made you worry... By the way, I bought you a breakfast, and it's at the gate of the community now. Tell me which building you live in, and I'll give it to you." You send it over."

   "Why are you buying me breakfast?"

   "I'm used to you."

   "Why are you spoiling me?"

   "Because you are my girlfriend!"

   "Do you still remember that I am your girlfriend?"

It was only then that I realized that I had fallen into Mi Cai's words. She really cared about what I asked her to leave last night, and after another moment of silence, she said, "I just don't want you to be too tired, and I'm too drunk It's easy to lose your temper, and you don't want to destroy your image of stalwart in your mind."

  After my somewhat far-fetched explanation, Mi Cai didn't bother with me about what happened last night, and ended the call after telling me which building she lived in.

  …

Entering the complex, I found the building number that Mi Cai mentioned, only to find that she lived in a townhouse instead of a suite, and there was an independent courtyard where her car was parked. In Suzhou, where every inch of land is expensive, The value of this cottage is simply beyond my gaze.

Mi Cai opened the door for me still wearing her cotton cartoon pajamas. I followed her into the small villa, and was immediately attracted by the elaborate layout in the courtyard. Looking at the flowing pool water and rockery, I felt like I was in a In a small garden in the south of the Yangtze River, she was even more curious about why Mi Cai gave up such a good living environment and lived in that old house.

  While walking, I sighed and said: "The environment here is very good, very stylish!"

  Mi Cai smiled and replied, "This house was given to me by my uncle when I celebrated my birthday last year."

  Mi Cai’s answer made me even more confused about the relationship between her and Mi Zhongde. Why Mi Zhongde gave her the best materially, but at the same time pushed her so hard in the mall?

Thinking about it carefully, people are contradictory, just like myself, who desperately wanted to be nice to her, but refused her to be nice to me. In the final analysis, Mi Zhongde’s conflict stems from desire, while my conflict stems from inferiority. I understand that both Mi Zhongde's passion and my low self-esteem have hurt Mi Cai to a certain extent.