Siheyuan: Pushing Huairu, the Prime Minister admits defeat

It has to be said that Lin Chaosheng's androgynous fake voice was indeed very confusing. Besides, he was a regular customer of the brothel, so he was very good at pretending.

Song Junwan, who was considering whether to take the risk of flying onto the eaves to investigate the situation, was stunned for a moment, and then showed an expression that said, "As expected."

I continued to squat at the crack of the door and eavesdrop, and by the way, I wrote down the content of the sound in words, such as "mellow and gentle, winding and lingering".

After writing these words, Song Junwan still felt unsatisfied. She scratched her ears and cheeks and added a few more sentences: "The sound is like resentment, like longing, like crying, like complaining; the sound of anger is unrestrained, and the sound stops the moving clouds.

Only in this way could he continue to eavesdrop contentedly.

In the room, if Empress Dowager Xiao had not seen it with her own eyes, she would have almost thought that someone was doing something improper in her bathroom.

"Lin Zhuangyuan, Lin Zhuangyuan, please restrain yourself..."

Empress Dowager Xiao, who had recovered from her surprise, was a little amused and helpless. She retreated into the bathtub, supporting her chin with her slender wrist, and carefully looked at the number one scholar in the dynasty with her eyes as moist as apricots.

His eyebrows and eyes are bright and his face is as handsome as jade.

He has a tall figure and is free and easy.

It would be perfect if you could have a little more shamelessness and not be so frivolous and exaggerated.

"Ah? Queen Mother, please hold back? I have already held back very much. My stomach is really churning. The Huan Yuan Tang has already reached the gate. Your Majesty, please help me undress and relieve the pain temporarily."

Listening to Eunuch Xiao Lin's crying, Empress Dowager Xiao was completely confused: "To be honest, I like to read those leisurely and interesting things, but I am not an old scholar who studies the classics. I don't know many words. What is Huanyuan Decoction?"

"Your Majesty, don't understand? Then I must be good..."

Lin Chaosheng showed a sly smile and was about to speak, but Empress Dowager Xiao ordered him to turn around: "Lin Zhuangyuan, please leave some thoughts for me, don't let the little image you have left be destroyed."

"Oh!!!"

After lengthening the tone, Lin Chaosheng turned around reluctantly.

"I just want to say that I can't hold my urine any longer and need to relieve myself. Your Majesty, please be merciful and help me relieve myself!"

"hiss!"

"Lin Chaosheng!!!"

"You are a bandit pretending to be me on your way to Beijing, right? What kind of vulgar words are you saying? Are you asking the Queen Mother to help you? Throughout the dynasties, which number one scholar has been so vulgar..."

Empress Dowager Xiao's face was filled with black lines. If she had not seen this guy's portrait before, she would have really thought it was a fake.

He is a very handsome gentleman, but why does he have a mouth?

"But, Kechen really can't hold it back any longer!"

"How about I go to the toilet alone to solve it?"

Lin Chaosheng was extremely embarrassed and weakly explained his situation. Since they were unwilling to help, could he just fend for himself?

There are three urgent needs for human beings. How can they be overcome by human power?

He just didn't believe that Empress Dowager Xiao was so unscrupulous. You have to know that the method of urinating has always been effective since ancient times. Many heroes have escaped by urinating.

However, ideals are full and reality is skinny. The brave and courageous northern queen mother, who looked like a weak woman, didn't buy his tricks at all.

Putting the dagger back against his throat, Empress Dowager Xiao smiled playfully: "In this case, is there still water in your stomach? Can you hold it in?"

"No more, no more, not a drop left!"

Lin Chaosheng swallowed hard, his face full of sorrow: "Queen Dowager, I actually want to say something."

Empress Dowager Xiao, who had lost her temper due to this guy's jokes, could only wave her hands and say, "If you have something to say, keep shouting!"

"What I want to say is that according to anatomical research, urine is actually stored in the bladder, not in the stomach. The stomach contains the large and small intestines, and the large intestine is filled with night fragrance. Night fragrance is different from urine..."

Seeing that this guy still wanted to continue popularizing the difference between feces and urine, Empress Dowager Xiao was completely dumbfounded. Is this the Jiangling scholar idol that she had been thinking about day and night?

Is this the Qinhuai River talent who won the imperial examination of the Zhou Dynasty, was free and easy, aloof and arrogant?

Is this what is called, a lonely figure in a flower boat, an old friend from the rivers and lakes, a guest from Jiangling who has traveled thousands of miles away, whose words can stir the hearts of thousands of girls?

As expected, all the novels are lies, woooo...

Lin Chaosheng, whose character had quietly collapsed, did not notice Empress Dowager Xiao, who looked as pale as death.

Before he was hit to death by the dump truck, he was a vulgar man who only cared about food and sex. The 300GB of girl scrolls in his hard drive can fully guarantee this.

After traveling to the strange world of the Great Zhou Dynasty, Lin Chaosheng had the misfortune of becoming a tenant farmer's son. Although he later entered a private school, he hated the red tape.

After he gained some fame, he was often invited to discuss metaphysics with some hermits hiding in the mountains. These people were bohemian and hated old conventions.

For these people, singing naked is a small matter. What's worse is that some of them don't take a bath, rinse their mouths or brush their teeth for years. They are also addicted to alcohol and have a mouth full of rotten teeth.

Therefore, people who have been around Lin Chaosheng for a long time know that he has a free-spirited personality. For example, the owner of Baoxuan Bookstore often invites him to play in Goushe Walan in order to commission manuscripts.

"Queen Mother, why are you silent? If you don't speak, I will turn around, Queen Mother?"

Still no one paid any attention, so Lin Chaosheng simply turned his head and saw the haggard, exhausted, and distraught beautiful empress dowager, who seemed to be muttering, "It's all a lie, it's all a lie..."

He secretly wondered in his heart: "What's wrong with this crazy woman? She acts so rashly and has no rules. She looked so happy just now, but now she seems to be possessed by a demon."

He called out a few more times out of curiosity, squinting his eyes and not daring to look any further, for fear that the Queen Mother would put the dagger on his neck again.

"what?"

Empress Dowager Xiao came back to her senses from her trance and opened her mouth woodenly. When she heard the barely perceptible footsteps outside the room gradually disappear, she realized that the person in the corner had left.

She heaved a sigh of relief: "I'm fine, Mr. Lin, if you're tired, just take a rest."

"Your Majesty, a flying insect accidentally got into my eye. It's itchy and unbearable. How about opening my eye and rubbing it?"

When he heard that he didn't have to continue shouting those shameful words, Lin Chaosheng stopped talking as if a burden had been lifted off his shoulders, and tried to steal a glance at the empress dowager from the corner of his eye.

The situation was urgent just now and he didn't have time to see anything.

But he found that the woman had put on a skirt at some point, and was fiddling with the pages of a book, looking at him leisurely.

"Queen, I am exhausted tonight. Do you think there is any reward for me? For example, gold, silver, treasures, night-shining pearls, jade jewelry will do."

After this incident, Lin Chaosheng had a general idea of ​​Empress Dowager Xiao's personality, and also knew what kind of tune the beautiful empress dowager liked, so he deliberately made some sarcastic remarks.

His top priority is to establish a good relationship with Empress Dowager Xiao. In this way, even if he cannot return to his official position in the future, he can still live freely in the harem.

It is easier to get things done if you have someone in the court. This is an eternal truth.

"I don't have any jewelry or anything like that. My Yongle Palace is also very shabby. But there is one thing I think you might like."

"No way, there really is a reward?"

Lin Chaosheng was just talking casually and didn't have any expectations in his heart. Who could have expected that on the first day of entering the palace, the empress dowager would actually be willing to reward him.

My heart warmed up immediately, and I said in a panic: "The Queen Mother is being too polite. How can I accept something from the Queen Mother? I am just being talkative. However, if the Queen Mother really wants to reward me..."

He suddenly stopped talking in the middle of his words because he saw Empress Dowager Xiao actually threw her own clothes to him.

“Is this a reward?”

"Just keep it if you're told to. Why are you wasting your time talking?"

Empress Dowager Xiao glared with her beautiful eyes and took out the dagger again.

It was not until Lin Chaosheng realized that he was unwilling to accept the small clothes that her expression relaxed and she gently stroked the other's face with her jade-like hands.

After he turned his head awkwardly, she smiled and said, "Goodbye, Mr. Lin. My palace is short of manpower. I would like to trouble you to help wash this little dress. I will come to pick it up in three days!"

Lin Chaosheng was completely speechless: "This Queen Mother is really careless, she is afraid that some gossip will not spread. If the Emperor knows about it, I will be cut into pieces with three thousand knives."

He suddenly felt that this palace was full of doubts and was not as simple as he had initially thought...