Rebirth: My Mother is a Virgin Mary

I will never forget the thirteenth day of the first lunar month in my senior year of high school. I felt anxious since I woke up, and my eyelids kept twitching. I thought I didn't get enough rest, so I wanted to take a nap during the break, but my anxiety became worse and worse. I gasped for breath, and my hands kept shaking as I tried to calm down. The monitor saw that something was wrong with me and was about to send me to the infirmary, but the head teacher came to the classroom, looking unhappy. He patted my shoulder and said, "Your parents just called and said that your grandfather passed away. I'll give you a few days off. Come back after the sixteenth. I'm sorry!"

A string in my brain suddenly broke, and a place in my heart collapsed. There was a long ringing sound in my ears. I saw the monitor's mouth opening and closing, but I couldn't hear anything she was saying. I wanted to stand up, but found that I had no strength in my whole body and my legs were shaking. I tried to support myself with my arms, but my arms drooped as if they were not mine... The monitor thought I was in such a bad state that I was afraid that I was shocked by the news of the death of my relatives. She told the head teacher, and she and another girl helped me back home.

The school is not far from home. The journey that was supposed to take five minutes took half an hour. The house was also in a panic. Lin Qingmei and Cheng Xinyuan's eyes were red, and they had obviously just cried. Cheng Xingmin's expression was not good either, but he looked very sad. The one who was patting his back and whispering to him was Cheng Xinlin. When Cheng Xingmin saw me come back, the expression on his face immediately turned into anger. He walked towards me quickly and slapped me with all his strength: "You unlucky star! You still know how to come back! Your grandfather was killed by you!" Cheng Xinlin hurriedly grabbed Cheng Xingmin, and Lin Qingmei came to pull him. Cheng Xinyuan said angrily: "What does it have to do with my sister! She is very sad too!" Cheng Xingmin pointed at me and said: "She is pretending! If she was really sad, she would have come back without us telling her! Look at your brother, he has telepathy and came here without even going to morning self-study. What about her!"

I didn't say anything, the squad leader spoke first: "Uncle, Cheng Lin has been feeling unwell since this morning. She told us that she felt something bad was going to happen. We all know that she didn't even have breakfast and is in a very bad condition. She has been holding on. How can she not have a premonition? Look at her, how can she pretend like this!"

"What's it got to do with you! Go back to where you came from!" Cheng Xingmin shouted angrily.

The monitor and another girl frowned. The girl said, "No wonder Cheng Lin never mentions family matters. You don't look like your father has died, and you still have the energy to beat your daughter. We kindly sent Cheng Lin back, but you scolded us. Humph, it's really sad that Cheng Lin has a father like you!" After saying that, she didn't care how angry Cheng Xingmin was, and patted my hand: "I am with you! Take care of yourself!" After that, she took the monitor and left without looking back.

"What are you still standing there for! Are you waiting for me to invite you to the car?!" Cheng Xingmin's voice sounded again, and Cheng Xinyuan took my hand and walked towards the car. My family didn't have a car, and this seven-seater van looked like it belonged to Cheng Xingmin's unit, so he must have borrowed it. Cheng Xinyuan and I sat in the back seat, and Lin Qingmei sat in the front seat. She turned her head and said to me, "Don't blame your dad. Your grandpa passed away suddenly, and he was sad and confused... After everything is done, you invite those two classmates to your home, and I will personally apologize to them." I ignored Lin Qingmei's polite words and only asked her, "How did grandpa die?"

"When people get old, they will always have some illnesses, not to mention your grandfather..."

"But grandpa was fine when we went home for the New Year!" How could he not be fine? He took a family photo with the whole family and gave me a big red envelope.

"I was already holding on at that time, because I was afraid that you youngsters would not be able to handle it if you knew about it... Besides, you and your brother are about to take the college entrance examination, and you can't let it affect you in the slightest!"

"Is the college entrance examination more important than grandpa's health? Do you want to wait until we are done with the college entrance examination before telling us?"

"Don't you guys know this? Your grandpa passed away in his sleep, so he didn't suffer. He was almost eighty years old, so he died of old age. Go back and have a good cry. Your grandpa loved you the most!" Lin Qingmei shut up in time because Cheng Xingmin and Cheng Xinlin got in the car. Cheng Xinlin and Lin Qingmei sat side by side, Cheng Xingmin sat on the passenger seat, and his colleague was driving.

It was the thirteenth day of the first lunar month, a chilly spring season. It had just snowed two days ago, and the roads were still muddy. The car was not driving fast, but no one spoke along the way. Cheng Xinyuan kept holding my hand and staring at my left cheek. Cheng Xingmin used all his strength to slap me in the face, and there was nothing wrong with my face except some redness and swelling. I was leaning sideways when talking to Lin Qingmei just now, because my left ear was "buzzing" all the time and I couldn't hear anything.

Grandpa passed away in the middle of the night. Grandma got up and looked at Grandpa and found something wrong, so she quickly called the uncle's family next door. It was almost noon when we arrived. The eldest and second aunts were not far away and arrived first. Uncle and aunt got the news early in the morning and rushed back. Now they are busy preparing various things. Although Grandpa passed away suddenly, these elders also knew about Grandpa's physical condition and were more or less prepared. Seeing us coming, the eldest aunt instructed some things. The second aunt looked at my face and snorted coldly: "Your father beat you, right? If I say he beat you well, it's worth it to beat you to death!" The eldest aunt rolled her eyes and touched my face: "Lin Lin, does it hurt? Don't pay attention to your father, and don't pay attention to your second aunt, go inside to see your grandfather for the last time!" I looked at the eldest aunt, her eyes were full, and she tried hard not to let the tears flow down. My heart hurt a little. I took the mourning clothes from the eldest aunt, put them on, and followed Lin Qingmei into the main room.

In the main hall, my aunt and my cousin Cheng Xindan were already burning paper. My uncle's brothers and sisters were all out of town and were on their way back after hearing the news. When my aunt and Cheng Xindan saw us coming in, they just looked up and said nothing. My aunt pulled Lin Qingmei over and said to me, "Lin Lin, come and see grandpa..." I nodded and walked silently to the coffin.

Grandpa was wearing neat clothes, lying there quietly, with a kind face. I wished he was just asleep, woke up and saw me, smiled and said "Lin Lin is here", then got up and gave me his hidden snacks... He was the one who loved me the most in this family. When I was a child, I loved going back to my hometown. Grandma was not nice to me, and I didn't get close to her, but because Grandpa was there, she wouldn't do anything to me, so I was willing to come back, and because Grandpa protected me everywhere and treated me better than other grandchildren, sometimes my uncle wanted to beat me or scold me, but I had to see his face; I like to move a small stool to sit I was with my grandfather, listening to him talk about the past, how he studied, how he went to the county town, how he supported his family during the famine. My grandfather had high blood sugar and loved sweets. My grandmother kept the biscuits and milk brought by the younger generation and did not let my grandfather eat them, so he secretly took them, and then took me to the kitchen and closed the door, and the two of us enjoyed the candies, biscuits, and chocolates that he had hidden... I recalled my grandfather's kindness and could not help but touch his hand, which was stiff and without any warmth. He was really gone, and the grandfather who loved me and protected me was no longer there...

From the time I learned about my grandfather's death until now, I didn't say a word or shed a tear, but the moment I touched my grandfather's hand, I couldn't hold it back any longer and burst into tears. Cheng Xindan couldn't hold it back either. She had been sobbing quietly before, but I don't know if she was infected by me, but her crying became louder.

My aunt glanced at me and said contemptuously, "You're pretending very well!" My aunt and Lin Qingmei glared at her. She snorted coldly and continued to burn paper money.

At my great aunt's signal, I knelt between her and Lin Qingmei and burned paper money together. This is the custom in my hometown. Before the funeral, the paper money must be burned continuously. Although cremation has been advocated for a long time, for our remote village, the traditional concept in people's bones cannot be broken. They believe in tracing their ancestors and returning to their roots, and insist on burial. The government advocates cremation, but it does not completely ban burial. Cheng Xingmin and his brothers and sisters are well-known filial sons and daughters in the village, so grandpa's funeral was quite decent.

The mourning hall completely covered the door to the main room. The men in the family knelt in the hall to thank the people who came to pay their respects. Cheng Xinyuan knelt at the edge in mourning clothes. He didn't understand the rules, but he knew to follow them. He followed the adults and acted quite decently. The mourning hall had just been set up, and there weren't that many people coming to pay their respects. Grandpa had been a teacher when he was young. In the era of scarce educational resources, he was the only teacher in the area. His students covered not only the whole world but also the nearby villages. Grandpa had a high seniority in the village and a good character. He was truly respected. The eldest aunt also looked out: "Don't kneel all the time, squatting is fine. This is just the beginning, and it's not time to get busy yet."

There was some noise outside, I didn't know what happened, my aunt and the others just stood up to see what was going on, and I was slapped in the face again. This time it was my uncle who hit me, he kicked me again and again with his muddy cotton shoes, I couldn't dodge, my uncle was a farmer, when it wasn't busy farming season he would move bricks on the construction site, he was much stronger than Cheng Xingmin.

He kicked and cursed: "You are a jinx! I should have killed you in the first place!" These words, "jinx" and "evil star", I have heard them countless times since I was a child, but I never knew or understood them, and no one told me why. Lin Qingmei held her uncle with one hand and protected me with the other hand. She wanted to take care of both sides but failed to do so, and she was kicked several times by her uncle. The aunt pulled the uncle: "Why are you angry with the child? She knows nothing!" Then she said to the indifferent aunt next to her: "Meixian! Hurry up and hold your brother! Lin Lin is almost beaten to death!" Li Meixian symbolically pulled twice and dodged again.

Cheng Xinyuan rushed in from outside and stood in front of me, he opened his arms: "Why did uncle hit my sister!" Cheng Xingmin came over and dragged Cheng Xinyuan away: "Why are you meddling in this? Come out with me!" People outside the house stood one by one, no one stopped them, watching all this indifferently. In the end, my eldest aunt drove my uncle away with a broom, cursing as she drove him away: "You rebelled just after our father left! Why did you hit Lin Lin! What does she know! Our father loved Lin Lin the most when he was alive. You beat her like this to make our father die with regrets!"

"Dad died because he loved her!" The uncle hid and shouted, "If the old man hadn't taken care of her, he could have lived for many more years! Many fortune tellers said that dad could live to 90! But he was killed by this unlucky star!"

"Enough!" It was my grandma who spoke. I watched her walk in with a cane, feeling a little desperate. Grandma, she hated me the most. She must be here to help her son...