Hogwarts: Bourne Returns from Warhammer

Professor Bourne and Professor Scamander rode on their broomsticks, chasing the image of Teddy Niffler formed by the spell, flying all the way from Russell Park to Knightsbridge under the Disillusionment Charm.

It can be said that they have perfectly replaced the work of the detectives in Scotland Yard, most of whom are now thinking about whether to take a temporary sick leave or something.

Because, just after the mysterious "stranger" escaped from the British Museum, the detectives discovered something unusual on the Seta Stone, one of the museum's treasures.

An ivory white business card with only one name on it:

Fantomas

First of all, it's a French name. Second, it's a very famous French name.

When they learned that this business card appeared under their noses, all the higher-ranking and more experienced Scotland Yard agents had a stress reaction.

Their reaction was first to check their wallets and guns, followed by cautious greetings between acquaintances.

Even the agents who are closer to each other would touch each other and rub and pinch each other's faces.

Of course, this is not a sudden revival of some kind of "British culture", but rather these agents are checking each other, fearing that their companions are someone else in disguise.

The reason for this situation is that the name "Fang Thomas" caused them a lot of trouble many years ago.

Let’s just say that there are two stereotypes that the British generally have about the French.

The first is the "French military salute", and the reason is self-evident.

Another stereotype that the British have about the French comes from the person called "Fondo Thomas" - when this name is mentioned, the phrase "this is difficult" will automatically pop up in their minds.

As for why Thomas Fang is "difficult to deal with", it is because this person once launched a cultural invasion in the UK that was no less severe than the V2 missile attack.

Thomas Fang is a French thief who specializes in stealing high-value jewelry and cultural relics. In addition to continuing to make efforts in the French region, Thomas Fang has also opened up a new track in the British region.

If we say that in the confrontation with a certain terrifying force from the University of the East, Britain's MI5 and MI6 have been in the dilemma of one-way transparency and being slapped in the face for many years.

The first foreign criminal who had business counterparts in Scotland Yard and had repeatedly rubbed its skin many times was Fang Thomas.

The latter relied on clever planning and face-changing skills that were almost magical. He once successfully carried out a series of notorious thefts in Britain while being chased and blocked by almost all the police forces of Scotland Yard.

He even created a wave: this Thomas single-handedly inspired many evildoers in Great Britain and was worshipped as an idol by many habitual thieves and burglars and was regarded as an anti-hero!

However, it has been almost ten years since Mr. Fang Thomas came to the British Isles to pee and poop.

In the past decade, many imitation crimes against him in the UK have been dealt with by detectives from Scotland Yard. Therefore, in recent years, fewer and fewer British people have used this name to cheat.

However, just when they thought the nightmare was over, the name appeared again in front of the detectives from Scotland Yard.

Combined with the location of the crime (the British Museum), the means of crime (creating chaos in a large scene), and the target of the crime (Fang Thomas likes museums), these Scotland Yard detectives have every reason to suspect that the person who caused today's riot was not little Karami, who worships Fang Thomas, but Fang Thomas himself.

"How old is that guy?" a detective asked in surprise to his immediate superior, the inspector who had previously apologized to Professor Bourne and Scamander.

The inspector did not really want to answer that question.

Firstly, he didn't know the answer to this question, and secondly, the person who asked the question, the detective, was really unlikable.

The detective's name was Maggie Dursley, a stout woman with a broad pink face and an angry expression. Her hair was tightly curled into a shiny puff, and with her overstuffed uniform, many of her colleagues actually called her "Ms. Goose" behind her back.

Moreover, Marge Dursley is also like a goose, with serious aggressiveness.

The inspector coughed lightly, and answered Maggie Dursley in a tone mixed with patience and helplessness: "Dear Maggie, regarding Fang Thomas' age, it is like asking how many rabbits are in a magician's hat - it is a difficult and embarrassing question to answer.

All I can say is, he could be any age, but as long as he's on our roster, he's our eternal acne that will never go away."

The inspector's words were met with nervous laughter and a disapproving frown from Maggie Dursley.

"Magicians are either liars or worse, hippies," Marge Dursley muttered to herself, "My poor brother has to endure terrible in-laws, who are just assholes like that... Even though they have played themselves to death, they still leave trouble in my brother's house."

Thinking of this, the female detective became very angry, and the police inspector felt something was wrong.

At this moment, the director of the museum hurried over with an expression of panic and anxiety on his face.

His name was Albert Snow, a thin old man with messy white hair and a pair of glasses that always slipped down his nose.

"Inspector, Inspector!" he gasped, "something bad has happened. The secret collection of our museum - the legendary 'Golden Apple' - it, it's gone!"

His voice trembled, revealing an incredible shock.

The inspector and Marge Dursley were both stunned by the news, but the former was wondering how the "golden apple" could have been lost, while the latter was wondering if there really was such a thing as a "golden apple" in the world.

"That's impossible!" cried the inspector. "The Golden Apple was brought from Venice only yesterday. It was kept under the strictest possible conditions. How could it have been stolen?"

Albert Snow shook his head, his face full of despair: "I don't know, I don't know, but it's gone..."

-

Fang Thomas sat in the driver's seat of Morris's sedan, his hands tightly gripping the steering wheel and his eyes fixed on the road ahead.

He doesn't know magic, but his desire and understanding of witchcraft far exceeds that of many real wizards.

He knew about the existence of wizards and their world, but he never stepped into that world because he knew that there were secrets and powers there that he could not touch. The back seat of his car was filled with all kinds of wizard supplies: wands, crystal balls, magic books, and even some magic potions bought from the black market.

Fang Thomas didn't know how to use them, but he knew that there was a certain power contained in these items, and as long as he could find the right way, he could turn this power to his advantage.

He glanced at the rearview mirror from time to time to check if there was a police car chasing him.

He knew that the chaos he had just created in the British Museum had attracted the attention of Scotland Yard, but he was not worried because he had a plan, a perfect escape plan.

Fang Thomas's object of worship is a two-headed chicken snake. This mysterious creature occupies the supreme position in his heart.

He believed that the cockatrice possessed some supernatural power that could guide him to a higher realm.

The purpose of stealing the "golden apple" was to offer the most precious sacrifice to the chicken-snake beast.

In his mind, he kept echoing the truth that the cockatrice had told him telepathically: "Knowledge is power, and power is everything."

Thomas was convinced that as long as he could master more knowledge, he would gain more power. The wizard world was a treasure trove of knowledge. The cockatrice had given him a potion, a "strengthening potion" made from the blood of a magical animal called the "Rhaem Bull". After taking this potion, his physical condition would become the same as that of a young man in his twenties or thirties.

"Rude Brits who will never learn to do anything more than cook fish and chips."

A smug smile appeared on Fang Thomas's lips. He knew that he had walked on an unusual path, a path that only he could walk. He was not a wizard, but he knew more about the secrets of witchcraft than many wizards. He was a Muggle, but he was closer to the world of magic than many Muggles.

He continued to drive forward, his heart filled with longing for the future and devotion to the cockatrice.

He believed that as long as he could offer the "golden apple" to it, he would gain its favor and gain more knowledge... and power.

And that day, he will no longer be an ordinary legendary thief, but a real being with supernatural powers.

Thomas Fang's car disappeared in the streets of London, just like his name, mysterious and unpredictable. Little did he know that behind him, there were two real wizards riding on flying broomsticks.

-

"That guy is weird."

Riding on a flying broom, tracking the Niffler in front of him, Bourne told Professor Scamander about the goblin he had caught.

"Can you believe that the culprit that caused the chaos in the museum was actually a toy for the little wizard..."

As he spoke, he took out the goblin from his pocket. The unfortunate little creature was enjoying a baby-like sleep.

Bourne threw it to the flying Professor Scamander, who caught it easily - this shows that Newt Scamander may have played Quidditch a lot when he was young - his skillful aerial catching movements were no different from those of the seekers in the Quidditch team.

"…The toy I'm talking about is not this goblin. Maybe it was just caught from a wizard's vegetable garden. The toy I'm talking about is the hat on its head." Bourne explained.

"There is a label on the hat, which says that this little red hat is a special Christmas toy from the 'Jumping and Playing Magic Joke Shop' in the 70s. It is specially prepared for goblins. When a goblin wears it, it will become as aggressive as a 'red hat'. Children in wizards' families can imagine themselves defeating a dangerous 'red hat' by defeating a goblin wearing a red hat."

"Merlin's beard!"

Professor Scamander found the label and looked at the "fainted" goblin. He sniffed its body with his nose and immediately came to a conclusion.

"Someone used hot sauce made from 'ghost peppers' to smear on this goblin, and the 'little red hat' on its head has traces of a sticking spell..."

As he spoke, Professor Scamander used the counter-curse of the Sticking Curse. The Sticking Curse and its counter-curse can all be used to rescue some magical animals in the wild, so this magical animal expert is very skilled in using them.

Unlike Bourne, if he wanted to remove the sticking curse, the method he used would most likely peel off the goblin's scalp.

Professor Scamander controlled the flying broom steadily while observing the goblin carefully. There was a thoughtful look in his eyes, as if he was thinking about something important.

"Bourne, what do you find strange?" Professor Scamander suddenly asked.

Bourne thought for a moment before answering, "I can't say, but my intuition tells me that the person we are tracking is probably not a real wizard. Normal wizards actually have their own logic when doing things, just like this toy Little Red Riding Hood.

Although it may not really be a toy suitable for children, and it may really be eliminated from the market because of this, but it was originally defined as a toy, so I think a normal wizard would also treat it as a toy if he got it.

If they want to create chaos, wizards will use other things that are more direct and more in line with the requirements of creating chaos, such as spells or potions. Even if it is "dung eggs" and "Filippo water-blooming fireworks", it seems more reasonable than using an outdated wizard toy."

Professor Scamander had just realized this problem, but he was not as able to express his thoughts clearly as Bourne.

So, when Bourne gave his reason, he immediately confirmed it and continued to infer: "This may mean that the suspect is not a real wizard, but a Muggle who knows something about witchcraft. The reason why he can use witchcraft is that he may have some wizard supplies and has a certain understanding of their functions, and then he can use them with Muggle thinking!"

"Professor, I just have a question. You just mentioned that you seemed to feel the breath of Dementors... Could it be that the wizard's tools can imitate the effects of Dementors?" Bourne asked.

Scamander thought for a while, then his eyes suddenly lit up, but he immediately frowned.

"It seems that there really is such a thing. I remember that it was a tool specially prepared by the British Ministry of Magic for the Aurors guarding Azkaban. It is called the 'Dementor's Skin'. As long as you put that thing on your body, the Dementors in Azkaban will regard you as one of their own when you walk in Azkaban.

However, during the use, the "Dementor Skin" seemed to have some problems. Any wizard who wore the Dementor Skin for a long time would become as depressed and full of negative energy as the Dementors in a short time. Many people went to St. Mungo's for treatment.

Therefore, many years ago, the equipment of "Dementor Skin" was eliminated by the logistics department of the Ministry of Magic. They were all sent for destruction, but if what we speculate is true, why would that person have a "Dementor Skin"? This is simply 100% or even 90% unreasonable!"