Zongman: I have really retired!

(Because there is a lot to write about the plot timeline, I put some of the ideas that do not affect the main line into Lao Fute. If you are interested, you can read it...)

The following text:

In a burst of severe pain, Xia Youjie ended this long and bitter memory.

The instrument representing the heart rate was beeping, but Xia Youjie's own thoughts were still stuck in the hopeless and regretful bitter summer of his previous life.

How can I describe that feeling of regret? It was probably like encountering a flower bone that was soaked by the heavy rain on the roadside. It was obviously not touched and harmed, but the stem was still broken. Its fragrance disappeared silently, and no one was there. care.

Xia Youjie stood up and silently pulled out a bunch of tubes on his body, then stared blankly at the blood slowly seeping out from the needle holes on the back of his hand. It was really a period of flawless but unhurried ethereal youth...

It's a pity that it doesn't belong to him...

"What are you thinking about?"

At some point, Meng Shuxu was standing next to Xia Youjie, and his eyes glanced at the back of Xia Youjie's bleeding hand.

"What did you see?"

"Well...a bunch of mess from the previous life..."

Meng Shuxu frowned: "What kind of metaphor is this? What I'm asking is what was your name in your previous life? That dynasty."

He reached out and touched Xia Youjie's forehead.

"It didn't make you stupid, did you? I remember that the curse seal at the back was successful."

Xia Youjie looked strange: "Curse seal?"

"I gave you a piece of information. The price you pay for awakening your spell is relatively rare. It should be to accept the wash of memories from your previous life while maintaining your original intention.

Many people's mood changed drastically after receiving the memory wash. Some even became schizophrenic, and the sequelae were more serious than normal. So later I applied for a human experiment in this area from the bureau. You agreed then, what? Did you really forget? "

Xia Youjie recalled that this happened, but he was just about to transfer to another school and pack his things, and he didn't pay much attention to the outside world's reaction. Meng Shuxu might have given it to him among a bunch of information about spells.

"Sorry, I seemed to have forgotten."

"It's okay, how do you feel? I didn't want to let you use it so early. After all, the first perspective and the third perspective are different." Meng Shuxu smiled.

"Fortunately, I remembered a lot of things."

Xia Youjie closed his eyes and recalled it. He clearly remembered [Xia Youjie's] abilities in his previous life before he defected. Now he felt that he could return to the level he had at that time as long as he went on the court and practiced.

However, I can’t remember much about my physical skills after defecting, but I remember a lot about gossip...

"I seemed to almost quit my memories in the middle, and later on I could no longer empathize with that guy. What was going on..."

Xia Youjie was also curious. At that time, he was overly stimulated by the incident of his parricide in his previous life, and he really couldn't control his temper when he got angry.

"Well, your mood swings were too great at that time, and you almost fell out. The memory of the technique you were able to retain in your previous life was not much and unstable. No one is sure whether you can enter next time or how much you can retain.

I thought it would be a pity to miss it, so I arranged a curse seal for you to separate you from his emotional resonance. Otherwise, you will either become a fool because your brain cannot bear the influx of information, or you will accept a large amount of information that belongs to him. Emotions gave birth to a second personality similar to him. "

Of course, it is also possible that after waking up, he will no longer be able to know the follow-up information about him in his previous life, but there is no need to tell him this.

Xia Youjie nodded and said he understood. Although the first-person perspective experience of getting along with [Gojo Satoru] was very happy, the later [Xia Youjie] was really depressed after he defected.

Xia Youjie himself doesn’t guarantee whether he will be so depressed that he will develop a personality like [Xia Youjie] if he really experiences the rest of his life. It’s really scary to think about it! It would be nice to treat the following ten years of bitter summer like watching a movie.

But does [Xia Youjie] really not regret it? Do you regret not saying anything, regret your own self-righteousness, regret leaving everything you love, even the people who love you, to pursue your "righteousness" that even you feel is elusive?

Xia Youjie didn't know if [Xia Youjie] would regret it. The moment [Xia Youjie] committed parricide, Xia Youjie stopped admitting that the scumbag was him.

But Xia Youjie still fell in love with [Gojo Satoru], so much so that he was willing to regret for [Xia Youjie], regretted insisting on that ridiculous "righteous theory", and regretted not giving [Gojo Satoru] a look back when he left. .

[Xia Youjie] ah [Xia Youjie] ah, you are reminiscing about the three years of high school while shattering this unattainable dream. Both you and [Gojo Satoru] watched each other become trapped in a cocoon with you, you How can you really be willing to let [Gojo Satoru], who was once beside you, carry the "strongest" curse on his back for the rest of his life?

What's the point of all this? Obviously, as long as you leave yourself a little way out and leave a little room for the other party, even if you just say "look back at me"...

Xia Youjie's mood dropped. He really didn't like this kind of plot where a trustful letting go led to tragic consequences.

"What are you thinking? Jay."

Meng Shuxu stretched out his hand and patted Xia Youjie's shoulder gently. He felt that Xia Youjie's personality had changed a lot. The latter often expands a certain aspect of the person's nature, but in fact the person does not change much.

"Um - it's nothing, just, forget it... I just want to ask. Uncle... have you ever liked someone?"

Xia Youjie's face turned red, then he hesitated and spoke, and even rarely called Uncle Meng Shuxu. You must know that after he was ten years old, he called Meng Shuxu Mr. Meng.

"Like? Love?"

Meng Shuxu raised his eyebrows. This kid was so stimulated in his memory that he almost lost his memory because of this thing?

This kid wouldn't really fall in love with an ancestor from his previous life who died many years ago and is now buried in a cemetery deep in the mountains and forests, right?

"You won't really fall in love with any of your ancestors, will you? Although I am an enlightened parent and don't really care who you fall in love with, but forget it if it's the person in the memories. I don't know how many years have passed between you. .

And even though you have the same soul, in the end you are still two completely different individuals. Would you share your lover with another you? "

Meng Shuxu's tone was calm. Children are really troublesome. He must have cut off their empathy very early. Why did he still have an accident? Is he still an adolescent child? Should we arrange some sex education for Jay?

Falling in love with someone who has been dead for many years?

Sure enough, there are still fewer people to meet, so let’s try it with a few more people. It’s good to be “well-informed” about things like love.

"If you want to experience the feeling of falling in love, I personally suggest you go for a run. The dopamine secreted by the brain during running is second only to the dopamine secreted by the brain when falling in love. Or do you want me to introduce you to a few suitable people?"

Meng Shuxu's dark eyes remained calm, as if the fact that Xia Youjie fell in love with an impossible person had no impact on him at all. He was still interested in asking Xia Youjie what kind of person he liked. .

Xia Youjie said vaguely that that person was a god-like guy, a unique existence, and then refused Meng Shuxu's offer to introduce the person.

What kind of person would Meng Shuxu introduce?

There is a high probability that they are suitable people for marriage. Anyway, Xia Youjie is not attracted to them, at least not now.

Meng Shuxu did not ask further questions, but his eyes were full of inquiry.

Xia Youjie probably didn't notice some common sense differences between modern times and ancient times.

"It looks like you know each other very well? Are you going to stay up all night together to read comics?"

"It's okay, only when the guy can't sleep in the middle of the night."

Xia Youjie reacted the moment he said the words.

"It seems Jay likes boys."

Meng Shuxu said meaningfully, Jie has a little secret when he grows up.

"Um...you care about my sexual orientation?"

Xia Youjie tried his best to keep the topic about himself. He subconsciously didn't want Meng Shuxu to know that Gojo Satoru was a person living in the present, even though they were now separated into two different worlds and there was a high probability that they would never see each other again.

But Xia Youjie wants to try to see if he can find a strange or cursed spirit that can travel through time or summon in the future.

Let’s not talk anymore~ Anyway, young people’s minds are always flickering. Maybe he will forget the other person in a few years?

"Good luck to you then."

"what?"

Meng Shuxu gave endless blessings, but in his heart he had already decided to go back and read the information.

"Take a few days off and I'll transfer you to another school later. But I still want to remind you, do you still want to do this job? In your memory, you should have told you everything behind this job."

Xia Youjie suddenly remembered his purpose before coma - to enroll in Jiuhua College and then become a magician.

There is an unconcealable bitterness in my heart, just like drinking a full cup of coffee without sugar, and the strong bitterness spreads on the tip of my heart for some reason.

If it were Xia Youjie who had just started, he would have agreed without hesitation, but how would he choose now?

Being a magician is like a marathon, but the image at the end is so ambiguous and blurry that I can no longer tell which one is my sincerity.

What if what is waiting at the end is a mountain of corpses of my companions?

Do you have any questions about the world right now? This is a world where magicians are active under the shadow side in order to protect the order of general society.

Standing on a road with no end, Xia Youjie didn't know how to choose.

[Xia Youjie] was afraid of the mountains of corpses of his companions at the end, and of the sacrifice of his companions and juniors for the endless rescue. However, even if he abandoned everything and spent his whole life to uphold the righteousness that others did not understand, he still ended up in a corner. The best friend is over, the righteousness he upheld seems like a joke, and the corpse of the descendant is still unseen at the end.

Xia Youjie is also at a loss for this kind of future where the outcome is already known...

He is still a 15-year-old kid after all.

"It's okay to quit if you want to. You are very good. The Conjurer is just one of your choices. Remember, you are choosing it, not it choosing you.

If you really can't give up, you can treat this career as a hobby. If it doesn't give you the life you want, isn't it just a hobby? "

Meng Shuxu did not provoke Xia Youjie. He was also betting that he understood Xia Youjie's character, but he did not understand [Xia Youjie's] character.

Meng Shuxu is a person who likes to have everything in his hands. He rarely makes decisions when he is not sure.

But Xia Youjie is different. Although he has made a lot of plans to train Xia Youjie, if Xia Youjie himself chooses to give up, Meng Shuxu, a relative, will also respect his choice.

——This is Meng Shuxu's rare tenderness. Although he will always give Xia Youjie a chance to choose, he does not always give him the right to choose.

Xia Youjie was also hesitant, and he slowly spoke:

"Do I...have the talents of a conjurer?"

Meng Shuxu didn't speak. He tried hard to restrain his consciousness of trying to interfere with Xia Youjie's choice.

Xia Youjie was a little surprised that he didn't get a response, but Xia Youjie also knew Meng Shuxu, and he hoped that Xia Youjie would figure this out on his own.

Xia Youjie's heart seemed to be in a fierce competition, his thoughts were struggling between reason and emotion, and every decision seemed to be walking on a knife's edge, making him hesitant. Finally, he spoke slowly, with a confused tone.

“I longed to alleviate those misfortunes, but I knew there was nothing I could do because I suffered from them myself.”

Xia Youjie lowered his head. He thought about why he worked so hard to become a magician. In the end, he still wanted to protect himself at first, and later he changed his mind to protecting others.

“I never take any chances, nor do I expect anything that won’t happen, and I’m never sure that any disaster won’t happen. But I can’t just logically eliminate all the triggering people who disappoint me.

I tried very hard to become the ideal version of myself, but as a result, I didn’t even figure out who I was at the moment and what I wanted to do...

But I can still believe that no matter how bad the world is, there will always be people who are as bright as the sun..."

Xia Youjie couldn't make a choice, so he gave the power of choice to Gojo Satoru.

What would Satoru choose if it were Gojo?

Is it a smooth road that is destined to be safe and sound, or is it a journey home that is full of thorns and has a known end but is extremely exciting.

With Gojo Satoru's character, he probably wouldn't choose a boring life even if he had to do it over countless times...

In this case, there is nothing we can do, Satoru...

Meng Shuxu smiled and said, "I will be discharged from the hospital tomorrow. Go to bed early tonight. Don't stay up late. You won't be able to be so leisurely in the future."

The hands slowly pointed to seven o'clock, and the nurse brought dinner. Xia Youjie silently poked the remaining potatoes on the plate with his chopsticks. After mashing the potatoes thoroughly, he slowly raised his head and looked out the window.

"Satoru, I still can't seem to accept my mediocrity. Although a small boat left in the port is the safest, this is not the purpose of building a ship. Since I can't predict the future, the best way I can think of is to create it."