One big and one small are practicing love

Liu Xiaochen knew that if he wanted to contact her, it would not be difficult to obtain her contact information. When he saw the familiar number, Liu Xiaochen took a deep breath, walked to Sun Xinxin's bedroom, and answered the phone.

"Hello! Teacher Zuo!" Liu Xiaochen said as calmly as possible.

"Yeah! Xiaoxiao."

Both of them were silent for a moment, and then they both said at the same time: "Happy New Year."

"Where are you?"

"Xinxin family, what about you?"

"London, England, have you eaten?"

"Well, we just had dumplings with Sun Xinxin's family. Have you eaten them?"

"Not yet. I'll go see Changchang and the kids later. How is your work? Are you still getting used to it?"

……

No matter what the topic is, at the end of the conversation, the other person always asks another question. It seems like I could go on asking and chatting forever. It seemed that the two of them were not separated. As before, they were busy with their own affairs and chatted with each other when they missed each other. It seemed like they could be together again...until a familiar female voice came from over there.

"Let's go quickly, my parents are coming soon." It was Chen Qingyan's voice.

Zuo Kunmin lowered his voice a little and said, "Xiaoxiao, I..."

"Go and do your work, Teacher Zuo. Say Happy New Year to Changchang, Yanyan, and Xiaoxu for me." Liu Xiaochen finished speaking hurriedly and hung up the phone without waiting for Zuo Kunmin's response.

What delusions are you still harboring? When I first saw Chen Qingyan, I knew intuitively that she would definitely be able to be with him. Appearance, temperament, figure, aura, everything is extraordinary. Liu Xiaochen recognized that she was as good a woman as Teacher Wang.

Take a deep breath, gently wipe the tears from your eyes, and turn around to go out. I saw Sun Xinxin pushing the door open and walking in. She was holding a cane under her arm, supporting her body and moving forward. Although Liu Xiaochen had psychological expectations about Sun Xinxin on crutches, the moment he saw it, he was still shaken in his heart.

"It's Teacher Zuo's phone number, right?" Sun Xinxin said as she moved in.

"Yeah!" Liu Xiaochen hurried over and tried to help Sun Xinxin, but was unable to do so. After Sun Xinxin sat down by the bed, she took her crutch and placed it firmly on the bedside.

"There is something I forgot to tell you. My mother told me that Teacher Zuo came to the village to look for you last year."

"When did this happen?"

"Just two days after I was injured and hospitalized, my mother said that on the morning you left, Teacher Zuo came to see you. He didn't know where your home was and asked from door to door. Teacher Zuo had outstanding appearance, and some people remember him as Teacher Wang’s husband. This incident quickly spread in the village, and there are various theories.”

Liu Xiaochen looked at Sun Xinxin and asked seriously: "What did they say?"

Sun Xinxin forced a smile and said: "You also know how good the people in the village are at making things up. They don't understand the actual situation and they are all talking nonsense. You don't need to know. I just remind you, don't tell our classmates that you have gone home, and don't Go to the class reunion."

Liu Xiaochen sighed, slumped down, and said: "If you don't tell me, I can guess what they said about me. It is indeed against ethics and morals for me to be with Teacher Wang's husband. It is also true that I have been kept by him. Over the years, I have Food, drink, food, nothing was given by him. I'm sorry for Teacher Wang, I..." As he said this, Liu Xiaochen burst into tears.

Sun Xinxin hugged Liu Xiaochen's arm and said, "Don't talk about yourself like that. In the past few years, you have helped Teacher Zuo take care of his children, and the money he gave you was for tutoring his children. It's not like you were here when he had a family. Deliberately destroying it. You guys really like each other. Teacher Wang won't blame you, and maybe she will be grateful to you for taking care of her family."

"Really?" Liu Xiaochen asked Sun Xinxin, asking himself.

Suddenly I remembered Wang Luoxia's diary, which was filled with the ferocious word 'hate' written in red pen. A cold sweat broke out on my back. I shook my head urgently and affirmed: "No! Teacher Wang will hate me when he finds out. Love is selfish. No woman is willing to share her lover with others."

After saying this, Liu Xiaochen was shocked and the hair on her body stood up. It was the first time she confirmed this statement.

When he was with Zuo Kunmin, Liu Xiaochen had some moral self-doubts. Just self-deception out of selfishness. Now that Liu Xiaochen has loved someone deeply and has truly experienced all kinds of feelings, Liu Xiaochen can no longer deceive himself.

I wanted to ask for more of his companionship and care, I had to worry about my efforts, I complained about his incomprehension, I kept all kinds of grievances in my heart, I was jealous and resentful of Chen Qingyan, and I couldn't let him go...Liu Xiaochen finally admitted his desire, jealousy, and hatred. , fear, and selfishness.

Most love does not need to be selfless, understanding, tolerant, pure, and beautiful. It is very difficult to be able to withstand the public's ethical and moral judgment without being demanding, possessive, or harmful.

Some people regard so-called true love as sacred and sublime and will sacrifice everything for it. Treat ethics and morality as pedantic and restrictive, and turn a blind eye to the harm caused to others. Liu Xiaochen had thought and done this before.

But now, being judged by acquaintances, echoing Teacher Wang's hatred, and living in the pain of not being able to love. Liu Xiaochen understood that any love that violates basic ethics and morals is based on the pain of hurting others.

Realizing this, Liu Xiaochen felt intense sadness and guilt. Without saying a word, he silently left Sun Xinxin's home and returned to his own home.

Liu Xiaochen took out the paper-wrapped diary from the suitcase, hugged it, cried loudly, and said over and over again: "I'm sorry, I'm sorry... Teacher Wang, I'm sorry..."