[One Piece] Dionysus’ third-rate script

"Your Excellency, Lieutenant General, I have your urgent letter, sent from Beihai."

The curly-haired man, who was still struggling with the pain of a hangover, waved him out. After a while, he rubbed his head and got up from the chair. After groping on the table for a while, the letter failed to complete its mission of conveying information. Plunging pitifully into the trash can.

After doing this, Kuzan didn't feel guilty at all. He opened the book and put it on his face, blocking the bright sunshine outside, and began to mend his nerves after staying up late and drinking.

The words "Comprehensive Examination of Beihai Myths and Legends" are printed on the cover of the book.

It’s okay to read this kind of nutritious fairy tale book while working, and it’s even more excessive to catch up on sleep openly. But when these things happen to this "Lieutenant General Kuzan" who is famous for his laziness, everything becomes reasonable. stand up.

Especially after a certain extermination mission five years ago, Kuzan took his passiveness to the extreme. You didn't see him on the battlefield as many times as you bumped into him in a bar.

Lieutenant General Kuzan, who took every opportunity to give himself a vacation, finally suffered a big loss in Beihai last month. It is said that he sank a transport ship full of royal liqueur. The wine merchant used phone calls every day to urge him to pay back the money. Now he even wrote to the navy headquarters to complain about him, demanding that he be punished no matter what.

The navymen at the same level as him talked about it and joked about it every time they met him.

"Kuzan hasn't paid back the money yet."

"Hahahahahaha, now you've even lost your wife's money."

"I can afford it with my wife, but Kuzan can't even afford one-tenth of the money even if he sells his underwear, hahahahahahahahaha."

People's joys and sorrows are not connected with each other. Kuzan only thinks that they are noisy. Now he is hiding from this group of colleagues who are carrying him and laughing at him like he is hiding from the god of plague. Of course, he is also hiding from his creditors.

Damn it, how could he have expected that a fleet of high-end liqueur transport ships comparable to ghost ships would suddenly appear on the sea where there was only one slave ship.

Especially a woman with short burgundy hair walked out of the frozen cabin. Although she was far away, he instinctively felt that the woman must be a rare beauty. After all, ordinary people simply cannot control red hair that is as dazzling as sweet red wine.

When he raised his sunglasses to take a closer look, he happened to look into her eyes, and a bad feeling spread from the soles of his feet to his scalp.

Damn it, he couldn't have collided with something special, like a wine elf.

In a sense, Kuzan was right.

He jumped back on the boat without hesitation, suppressed his urge to take a closer look, and headed in the opposite direction without looking back.

What returned to the Navy headquarters earlier than Kuzan was a claim form stretching from the desk to the floor. The most eye-catching thing was the nine-digit total compensation amount at the end.

The natural type of frozen fruit ability user, the only one in the navy in the world, the financial manager of the Dionysus Troupe can send the compensation form with his eyes closed. But he still misjudged Kuzan's mental capacity. No matter how he and the deputy manager tried to push him back and forth, Lieutenant General Kuzan would always have all kinds of reasons to frustrate them.

It is indeed natural to pay back debts, but the prerequisite is that you have the money to repay, otherwise there would be so many cases of forcing good people into prostitution and falling into trouble.

Kuzan chose the third path. He did not pay back the money, nor did he say that he would not pay it back. Instead, he used words such as "I am about to go on a mission." "Hey, I seemed to have left my wallet in the bar yesterday. I'm going to look for him now." "The phone bug was snatched away by the newspaper gull just now." Waiting for some excuses to fool his creditors.

It is not a wise choice to give up the phone bug offensive and turn to letters. Just like what he did just now, Kuzan often throws them into the trash can without even looking at them, and continues to look through the "Illustrated Book of North Sea Gods and Monsters" or "The Encyclopedia of North Sea Myths" that he found. kind of books. I seriously want to find out if there are any legends about wine elves or banshees.

The book he is covering his face with now is the only one he reads before going to bed that is related to the Banshee in Wine, although this book that says it is a millennium classic was actually just published in early this year, Kuzan But I watched it with relish.

If there is another chance to meet her one day, maybe I won’t have to pay back the debt.

Lieutenant General Kuzan, thirty-two years old, unexpectedly likes to daydream.

If you daydream too much, you will become stupid.

The dim light casts on the Tambourine glass beside the bar. The ice cubes squeeze and collide with each other. The loser sinks to the bottom of the glass unwillingly. Fine bubbles float up from the ice cubes and flow in together with the light amber liquor. in the throat of the drinker.

For whiskey, ice balls that are enough to fill the cup are the best choice, but Kuzan prefers a water cut with a balanced taste, which not only gently brings out the personality of the whiskey, retains the characteristics of dryness and mellowness, but also reduces the irritation of alcohol. , not too powerful.

He placed the Locke glass with a straight mouth and thick walls like a wine barrel on the carbonized wood bar. The ribbed outer wall faced the door, distorting the real world.

There was a brief commotion in the bar, and he just glanced at the cup without looking back. The increasingly clear sound of high heels and the sound of a door closing answered him that someone had just come in, and it was probably a beautiful woman.

Kuzan, who had been drunk for several days, came to Jiaqing Bar for a rare occasion. His purpose today was to have a drink to change his mood. He had no interest in thinking about having an affair or anything like that for the time being.

The bartender was very interested and said to the visitor: "Good evening, beautiful lady, it looks like the weather outside is not bad?"

"Yes sir, the night is beautiful tonight."

The mature sherry is not as sweet as her smiling voice. The gradually rising tone of her voice neutralizes the childishness implicit in her voice just right. She is subtly between a girl and a woman, cold but sweet. , like a martini by the pool on a summer night.

Although the burgundy curly hair only reaches the chin, it is still eye-catching. She chose a seat to Kuzan's right, one person away from her. When she pulled up the high stool and sat on it, she casually tucked her hair on the left side behind her ear.

Even the warm yellow lights were greedy for her beauty, scrambling to stick to her soft-lined profile and clinging to the high bridge of her nose to show off their glory. Her eye sockets are deep and the ends of her eyes are raised up. They are both passionate and ruthless. Her eye color is fresher than the Violet Fitz on the bar. Moreover, her eyes are lively and lively, with a look and look that cannot be matched by cocktails.

The finely crafted cyan suspender mermaid dress on her body is like a condensed purple ocean, and there are sparkling beads under the exposed chest and back. The body that has not completely finished growing is already slim and plump enough. The gauze materials that match each other cover her softness, drawing attention back to her beautiful shoulder and neck lines and fair skin.

At this glance, you will understand that she is a beauty that is rare to find and cannot be easily obtained. Maybe you can pay a lot of money to talk to her for a few words, but you won't get her heart as you wish.

The dull man would just stare at her in a daze, while the experienced hunter had already taken the initiative.

A handsome man with blond hair walked over from the corner of the bar. He sat next to Kuzan next to the woman. He turned sideways and blocked Kuzan behind him, eliminating all possibilities for this potential competitor to take action. .

"I think the night tonight is pretty average."

His words were very pointed, so he unexpectedly got her gaze, even though it was full of doubts and confusion.

"Compared with this lady, even the stars falling on my head will be dim. Thank you for allowing me to see the most unique beauty in the world."

The handsome blond man put his elbows on the bar, propped his head up and gave her a smile that he thought was charming.

"Please allow me to order a glass of wine for you as a thank you gift and a token of my gratitude."

If these sour words were said to others, Kuzan would definitely wave his hands disdainfully behind his back and laugh at him for pursuing women in such an exaggerated way. But when it comes to her today, these words don't seem excessive, or even not enough.

Kuzan, who was blocked by him, heard the woman chuckle, and she replied: "My pleasure, sir."

The first step went smoothly, and the blond man shouted loudly for himself in his heart. He still had a graceful face and turned his head to the bartender to order a drink for her.

"For this one"

He looked a little troubled and shy, but he still looked back at Dini like a gentleman.

"Excuse me for being rude, but I haven't asked Miss your name yet."

She raised her hand to touch her face, and her fingertips were buried in the red hair beside her ears. Only then did others notice that she was wearing a pair of lace gloves with a color similar to her eye color.

"Don't be sorry, just call me Vienna."

The blond man who successfully got her name immediately answered her that his name was Ide, and he continued to order a "Flight" from the bartender who crossed his arms and looked at him.

The man named Ide turned to her and explained: "Its color matches your eye color very well. It is also a dreamy violet color, which is both romantic and wonderful."

What nonsense is this kid talking about? Aren’t her eyes much prettier than cocktails? Kuzan took a sip of the whiskey in the glass and watched the bartender skillfully make a cocktail and push it in front of her, smiling and inviting her to taste it.

She picked up the glass of wine with her left hand and took a sip, then raised it to look at the light, still holding her face with her right hand, looking bored.

Ed noticed what she had done wrong. Not only did this glass of wine not interest her, it also vaguely made her bored.

"Miss Vienna, maybe there is something unsatisfactory about this glass of wine?"

Hearing this question, she placed the martini glass on the bar, drew a circle along the rim of the glass with her left index finger, and sighed: "It's my problem, I'm more used to drinking hard liquor."

In order to show his generosity and understanding, Ian put the cup of "Flying" in front of him, laughed heartily and said: "It's my fault that I didn't ask Miss Vienna's taste in advance and annoyed you."

In your mind, she should be blushing and prostrating herself under your suit pants. The whiskey in Kuzan's glass was at the bottom. He ordered two bottles of dark beer from the bartender who was standing watching the show. He took a sip from the bottle and continued to listen to what was going on there.

Ian wanted to buy her another glass of wine, but she said that Ian was already polite enough and it was her turn to return the favor. The arrogant man saw her blushing because of a cocktail and thought about what kind of wine a woman could drink. He couldn't hide his contempt and said that he could just ask for the same drink as her.

He didn't see the red-haired woman's meaningful smile.

It wasn't until the bartender brought two beer glasses with snowflake rims and two bullet glasses filled with high-strength vodka that he realized something was wrong.

This posture couldn't be a depth charge, right? A depth charge that breaks into fragments in one bite, and also uses the most powerful combination of vodka and draft beer?

He swallowed the light yellow beer and felt that his stomach was on fire. He glanced at the beautiful woman with a normal expression, and then thought about how the man's face was already weighed down by this glass of wine. He couldn't say anything in this. Time to escape.

She didn't look like someone who could drink this glass of wine. She probably just brought it out to scare him.

"Miss Vienna, unexpectedly likes to tease people."

Upon receiving this groundless accusation, her eyes widened innocently, as if this glass of wine was ordered by Ian to bully others.

"How can you say it's a joke? This is also my 'heart'."

She deliberately emphasized the words "heartfelt", and moved the hand holding her face behind her ear, holding the red hair on the side of her face and pushing it back. The lace gloves passed through her hair and fell back to the table.

This action was extremely tempting, and the man facing her had his Adam's apple choked up.

When peony flowers die, it is also romantic to be a ghost.

He was the first to throw the bullet cup into the beer. The overflowing foam looked dangerous and psychedelic under the light. Ian cleared his throat and offered to play a game with her.

Hey, hey, don't be so tasteless. Kuzan smacked his tongue behind his back, expressing disdain for a grown man trying to share a drink with a lady.

"Since it's a game, there must be punishment."

The woman who called herself Vienna held up her chin with her fingers intertwined in a platform shape, her arms resting on the carbonized wood bar, and she watched Ian continue to set up the trap.

"Appreciate further details."

The man with a cunning look said: "The loser must unconditionally agree to the winner's request. Is this punishment okay?"

Ian, who was still wearing human skin at the beginning, completely showed his fox tail, and even the bartender behind the bar shaking the mixing glass could hardly stand to listen.

The woman who finally got interested threw the vodka into the beer glass and replied: "Reasonable rules."

She picked up the large glass of bubbling depth charges and signaled to Ian, which meant that she was going to make a move that would shock everyone.

Kuzan heard a series of swallowing and cheering sounds, followed by the crisp sound of a glass-bottomed beer glass touching the bar.

There was someone who could drink this "nuclear warhead" in one go, and she was a newly grown woman who didn't look like she drank much.

With a smile on her face, her voice was as clear as if she had just drank a glass of water. She continued to raise her head and said to Ian: "Show me your sincerity, Mr. Ian."

He originally thought that taking small sips would knock her out first, but nothing happened after doing it in one go. Ian was dumbfounded. His face instantly became bloodshot and red, and he stood up coquettishly and said: There are still some things that haven't been resolved, so I'll leave for a while and then rush out the door to escape.

After this glass of wine, many people who were eager to try stopped and stayed in their seats.

Just kidding, who wants to drink up such high-alcohol mixed wine in one go and have their brains eloped with sex?

Only the woman who ordered another depth charge and Kuzan who had been drinking two bottles of beer for a long time were left at the bar. Seeing that he was always looking at her intentionally or unintentionally, the red-haired woman turned to him with a slight smile and nodded, leaving the bar and walking towards the bathroom.

The man who was waiting for an opportunity in the dark walked to the bar. When she left her seat, he passed her wine glass accidentally, and took out something unknown from his pocket with his right hand and wanted to throw it in.

"Ah la la la, it's best not to do that."

His hands were frozen in place before they even touched the bar, and the two wine glasses were brought to him by the curly-haired man on the right side of the seat.

Although he is a weirdo who wears sunglasses under such circumstances, his strength cannot be underestimated, and he is not someone he can easily mess with. He thought about the woman's appearance, then looked at his frozen hands, gritted his teeth and left the bar angrily.

She came to a bar alone and dared to put her unfinished wine glass on the bar. Is she naive or a little stupid? Kuzan did not order any more wine, and yawned as he waited for the woman to come back. Because he was mixed with whiskey and stout, he was now quite tipsy, so he might be able to go back and have a peaceful sleep.

"Good evening, sir."

While he was in a daze, someone sat down next to him. A burst of amber and pine scent mixed with a slightly spicy but gentle cardamom scent hit him, followed by the green cistus and clean musk scent, which was calming. Gentle, delicate and charming.

Her eyes reflected the man holding her two glasses of wine. Perhaps she took this as a signal to declare war, so she said to Kuzan: "Are you interested in continuing the game just now?"

No, Kuzan, if you keep drinking it, you won’t know what time you will wake up tomorrow. He thought so in his mind, but his mouth refused to obey and told her: "Of course, this beautiful lady."

Kuzan watched as she easily raised the wine glass and drank it all in one gulp. The golden wine flowed down her slender neck, onto her delicate collarbones and exposed skin, and he was reminded of her legs wrapped under the mermaid skirt. leg.

Isn't she a mermaid? By the way, do mermaids have such a high alcohol tolerance?

Now the pressure is on Kuzan's side.

He pushed his sunglasses onto his turban, picked up the beer glass and drank it like a risk. The spicy dryness of vodka and the refreshingness of draft beer combined, leading the high concentration of alcohol to attack his sanity, which was basically full of alcohol. His stomach and intestines were also tumbling like his brain was protesting against his master's misbehavior and wanted to revolt.

The consciousness that was bombarded by the "nuclear warhead" can still maintain a trace of sobriety. Kuzan is indeed a seasoned veteran, but compared to the woman who drank two drinks in a row and still only had a slight blush on her face, his alcohol capacity is simply small. ridiculous.

"Looks like I lost."

The words he spoke with a big tongue were slurred, and he leaned on the bar and gave in. His face turned red and blended with his dark skin, like a piece of chocolate sprinkled with brown sugar frosting.

The victory or defeat has been decided, and there is no need to continue the desperate battle. In his eyes, the beautiful woman seemed to be transformed into two people. She took out a piece of paper and a pen and pushed them in front of him. She obviously didn't even have a place to put her things. Where did these things come from?

Kuzan's confused brain couldn't figure it out, but her sweet voice told him to just sign here, so he wrote his name crookedly, put the pen on the paper and threw it back.

"Nice to see you here, Mr. Kuzan."

Have we ever met? Kuzan's question was suppressed in his heart, but he felt tired when he opened his mouth to ask. He didn't want to say anything more.

She laughed again.

"Do you remember the ship of liqueur that was broken a month ago? I am the owner of that merchant ship."

a month ago? liqueur?

Kuzan's memory came back, and he suddenly felt that the alcohol wandering in his limbs was briefly frozen by his ability. He woke up and resumed his thinking.

It's over, so what did he just sign? It couldn't be some kind of contract, right?

The woman who had achieved her goal stood up and was about to leave. She found Kuzan slumped on the bar and suddenly opened his eyes and looked at her. She smiled kindly at him, but Kuzan felt that this smile was heart-breaking.

"It would be great if you could agree to use your monthly allowance to pay off the debt."

Wait, whose allowance? Who agreed?

Anyway, his brain didn't agree to let him think anymore. Kuzan was knocked unconscious by the alcohol that returned to his body. He closed his eyes and lay on the table and fell asleep.

By the time the bartender woke him up, everyone in the bar had already left, and the woman was naturally not here. He opened his sore eyes, covered his head that was numb from pain, and started to lick his head.

"The lady has settled tonight's bill, you can leave directly."

From the corner of his eye, Kuzan noticed a card underneath the glass of beer he drank in front of him. He took the glass off and saw that it was a beautifully printed business card.

Dionysian Theater Company, Vienna.

The people who came to collect debts indeed claimed to be the financial manager of the Dionysus Troupe or something. He put on the sunglasses that someone had placed on the bar, picked up the business card and stumbled out of the bar while holding on to the wall.

It turns out that even if I meet her, I still have to pay back the money.

As for Kuzan freezing all the mythology books in his office into ice sculptures and throwing them away, that is a story for another day.