marvel angel

"It's different." Fang frowned, as if infinite resentment welled up in his heart, "Angela, you are too cruel. I finally seized the opportunity to die in a dignified manner, get rid of those painful shackles and cages, and immerse myself in Gain true freedom in the self-satisfaction of heroic sacrifice. And you, do you want to take away even this freedom from me?"

"I'm sorry, Clarice" Angela didn't rush to express her series of opinions.She knows that when it comes to comforting people who are feeling helpless, lecturing, scolding, arguing, and other actions that impose subjective will are not very helpful. "I'm so selfish," Angela lowered her head in self-reproach and continued, "I only wanted to bring you back to this world, but I forgot that this world has already made you riddled with holes and neglected yourself. s Choice."

"No, Angela, it's me who should be sorry. Please forgive me for my willfulness just now." Fang also lowered his head, took Angela's shining right hand, and rubbed it carefully, feeling the temperature on it. "People with telepathic abilities have always been keenly aware of every fluctuation of thoughts, and often understand their hearts better than others. So, please tell me what thoughts in my heart I have ignored." Fang stepped forward again He took a step closer to Angela, raised his neck, and looked into her gentle eyes sincerely, "I know that I have not been truly relieved, otherwise, how could I lose my temper with you?"

"This is how you lose your temper." Angela felt teasing again when she saw Fang's face returned to its usual well-behaved appearance.She raised the corner of her mouth and said jokingly: "Then you have to lose your temper with me more often. This kind of coquettishness is the best way to poke my cuteness."

But at this moment, Fang was not interested in Angela's sweet words to please girls.She poked Angela's ribs gently, reminding her to get down to business.

Angela, who was attacked to her weak point, said "Ouch" and then began to tell honestly:

"Clarice, do you remember the original plot of that movie? The person chosen by lot to stay on the meteorite was not the character played by Bruce Willis, but his daughter's boyfriend. He could have been with other Just like a human being, he returns to the earth in glory, spends the rest of his happy life in the worship of everyone, and even doesn’t have to pay taxes for the rest of his life. But he took the initiative to give up those things and gave up the opportunity of happiness to others. So. , a true hero sacrifices not his own life, but the life he longs for and loves."

"The real hero" Fang's tone was full of confusion, and his eyes were slightly confused, "Indeed, what I sacrificed is just a future that I no longer care about, and I am not a real hero. I'm afraid, what I get now is not True freedom.”

"Yes, Clarisse, as smart as you are, you must have noticed something. Why do you have to choose to end your life in this way of sacrificing yourself to save others?"

"because"

"Because, if you choose to commit suicide, you will be afraid that others will make irresponsible remarks about you and judge you as a coward. And by sacrificing your life in this way, no matter what other people think, at least no one will criticize you anymore. "

After hearing these words, Fang seemed to be stimulated. He hugged Angela tightly and buried his face on her chest, unable to speak for a long time.Angela gently smoothed Fang's hair and patted Fang's back.She could feel that although the girl in her arms had tried her best to restrain herself, there were still a few drops of grievance that warmed her clothes.

"Yes." Fang finally raised his head again and wiped the corners of his eyes, "You have to worry about other people's feelings even when you die. In the end, you die in other people's thoughts. Where is freedom and where is freedom? Angela, thank you for your help. Let me point this out. Maybe you think I don't deserve to die in this way, but maybe I don't deserve to live like you expect. I can't care for you the way you care for me. I can't love you the way John likes me. I went through too much torture and pain to fall in love with him that way. Finally, when I walked back to John’s house that day with the food he liked to eat and the hope of finding it again, I was caught in the police station for no reason. That was the last time I killed myself who had illusions about the future. I felt at the time that I was just like the hero in the policeman and the hymn. The fighting spirit ignited after sinking finally disappeared insignificantly in this miserable and miserable place. In the world. Can you understand that feeling?"

"Yes, I can understand. Clarice, I have also struggled with that kind of depression, that's why I understand you so much. I have had these thoughts of yours before." Angela held her hands tightly Fang's hands seemed to be afraid that the girl in front of him would dissipate into the endless darkness in the next second. "That feeling, at first, was like an inflammation of the soul. Fragile and sensitive, it hurts when touched, like everyone and everything They will hurt themselves, and even themselves are hurting themselves. But in the end, it doesn’t seem to hurt so much, because the soul has been eaten clean and calcified into a puddle of dead matter. But not feeling pain also means feeling the same Less joy."

"Yes, that's what I am now." Fang nodded frequently, "Every day, the smile on my face and the laughter seem to be just simple nerve reflexes, just like when the knee tendon is tapped, the calf will Kick forward mechanically. After the stimulation is cancelled, the generated happiness will also disappear quickly. I, I, have been broken, broken like a machine, and cannot be repaired. Wait a minute, Angela, you said you also After experiencing this pain, your soul is filled with such warm energy. How did you repair yourself? Is it your superpower?"

"what do you say"

"Yes." Fang observed that Angela's eyes were filled with a layer of shrewdness, and she pouted slightly dissatisfiedly, "If your ability can repair people's souls, you don't need to waste words with me here. I think, next you have to tell me that you repaired your soul by yourself alone, and I can be like you."

"It's not just on my own," Angela pinched her plump lower lips lovingly, "and even without my help, you will find a way to fix it sooner or later, because you have already found the clues."

"what"

"As you just described, your feeling of happiness is like a machine, which means that the redundant self begins to collapse and the attachment to the outside world begins to break. And this is also the positive significance of depression to human beings, which makes people Be able to gradually distinguish”

"Stop, stop, stop." Fang's pupils dilated in shock, and his emerald green irises were like a piece of fine jade inlaid in white marble, "Zhi, I can't understand the Buddhist words you say in English. And I can't understand them." , you actually said that depression has positive meanings"

"Okay, then I'll speak Chinese. Misfortunes are where blessings depend; blessings are where misfortunes lie. You should understand this, right?"

"Well, I have read the Tao Te Ching. These principles containing great wisdom should not be taught to us when we are so young, because when we need to truly understand them, we will find them too natural, pale and powerless. "Excuse me, how can you speak Chinese so well?"

"Don't worry about these details yet." Angela was vague and continued to explain, "Human beings are now keen on studying artificial intelligence, deep learning, and two-minded intelligence, so that robots can become as self-aware as humans. However, self-awareness is A very complex and profound concept. Many humans have not yet gained true self-awareness. What humans urgently need now is to learn to think like a machine."

"what"

"From personality and hobbies to cognition and emotions, we usually think of these things as part of ourselves. But in fact, they are just like software in computers, accessories in machines, and modules in algorithms. What can be called at will by systems, programs, and commands can be modified and controlled by the true self. What the Buddha calls enlightenment is to distinguish which thoughts are actually just executable programs in the brain in the chaotic labyrinth of the heart. , and peel them off to find the supreme processing center, the supreme me, and then familiarize yourself with and practice it without being guided by external programs. In the end, you can control your own life just like using an operating system at will."

"It's too, too, too mysterious." Fang's lips and teeth trembled slightly, "You mean that human beings are actually just machines."

"No." Angela closed her eyes lightly and shook her head slightly, "At least, it is a machine that can write commands by itself. I don't know if I should still call this kind of thing a machine."

"Self-Programming"

"Yes, when a person grows up, his thoughts, temperament, and behavioral habits are not given to him independently, but are instilled in him by the people and things he encounters in his growing environment. If he is lucky If he has never encountered setbacks, he will live his whole life with this personality written by others. And if he encounters failure, his brain will understand that his past habits are no longer suitable for the current state of survival, and he must take the initiative Make adaptive changes. First, it is a matter of deep introspection, eliminating past wrong concepts and habits, and gradually correcting them. But just like the inflammatory response in the body will always be excessive, this kind of harsh criticism of the self by the brain It can also lead to excessive introspection, which is depression. It removes too many cornerstones of personality at once, leaving people at a loss as to what to do in life.

"However, this is not a fault of nature or life. Wherever the leaves fly, fire will burn; after the fire disappears, new shoots will sprout. Depression has broken off all the redundant parts of your self-consciousness, and now what is left , is the ultimate core in your heart. Clarice, you no longer need to search for yourself, you only need to rely on your current thoughts to rewrite and establish the personality you want to be. In this process, there will be a lot of pain, It even hurts more than when depression first broke out. But it will also bring you a lot of happiness, the kind of happiness that comes from your own mind and soul without external stimulation. You will make yourself smile. "