I really don't want to be a teacher

Just standing there, I feel like I’m being tied to it, I can’t breathe...Standing in place without moving, but I feel like I’m walking towards the target, and the target is slowly moving away I'm getting closer..."

Moving his gaze upwards slightly, the middle-aged bailiff paused, then continued,

"...The big brother shot very quickly. After raising the gun, he took aim and shot directly, hitting the woman's heart. The chest was pierced directly, and the woman died immediately...

After the gunshot, I froze, as if suddenly the woman grabbed me again, and I couldn't stop thinking about the woman's appearance before. "

"... At this time, the big brother who was executing put away his gun, walked towards me slowly, walked to my side, and asked me if I couldn't bear to look at this prisoner.

I said, a little bit, I still feel like I was tied to it just now.

Big Brother smiled at me, and told me that, for the first time, feeling sick, flustered, and unbearable, it's all right, it's okay... Slowly, I got used to it.

After laughing, the big brother looked at the dead prisoner and told me,

Don't look at that woman as young, she looks like a little girl, but she forced some girls younger than her to prostitute, some girls were numb from the torture, they could only let her manipulate, and some couldn't stand it , committed suicide, and a few others were directly killed by this woman and her accomplices during the persecution process...

Listening to the second half of the big brother's words, my feelings suddenly became much less, although I was still a little hairy, and I was still a little disgusted..."

While talking, the middle-aged bailiff looked at the other side of the river, fell silent again, his eyes were in a trance,

Around the body, along the shore, tables are still lively and noisy,

The hot air rises from the oven in front of the barbecue skewers and the night stand, mixed with voices, and under the glare of the incandescent lamp, it overflows,

"...Miss Boss, clear the table..."

"Come on come on..."

"Eating these skewers is comfortable, come on, let's take another one..."

……

Amidst the hustle and bustle, the river not far away is still flowing quietly, and the breeze blows across the river from time to time, taking away the sound waves overflowing to the river,

Beside the table, the middle-aged bailiff was silent for a long time, then spoke again,

"...After that, for a long time, the court didn't have any more prisoners to execute. The feeling of going back to the execution ground seems to be gradually fading..."

Looking into the distance, the middle-aged bailiff paused, then continued,

"However, it was still that year... towards the end of the year, another death row prisoner needed to be executed... That time, the old captain decided to let me execute... that was my first execution.

On that night, I went to bed very early, but I tossed and turned on the bed, and I couldn’t fall asleep for a long time, as if I was going to the execution ground for the first time... It’s just that I’ve been there once, and that time, I didn’t have any excitement strength.

That night, I dreamed of the woman I met for the first time. She was crying and holding my hand in the car, telling me that she didn't want to die...

The next day, I got up very early, and arrived at the prison where the prisoner was detained with other bailiffs. When I arrived, the prisoner who was about to be executed was having breakfast..."

Chapter 296 Dumplings

"It was a middle-aged man with a simple and honest appearance and dark skin. He looked like an old farmer in the field.

Smile at everyone.

When he saw us coming, he was not afraid, so he smiled and said to us while eating the last dumpling in the bowl, 'Here we come'.

Before the execution, none of his family members came to see him, because they were all killed by him. "

While talking, the middle-aged bailiff paused,

"...It is said that on the way home that day, some villagers laughed at him, and his wife gave him a cuckold. At that time, he didn't say anything, and went home directly.

When he got home, he didn't ask his wife or say anything, just as usual, after dinner, when it was getting late, he went to bed with his wife... He still has a child, sleeping Next door to their bedroom.

In the dead of night, he suddenly asked his wife if she had cheated... His wife was very angry, so she quarreled with him, and finally slapped him, but he didn't respond or fight back.

After the quarrel was over, the two went to bed again... The woman fell asleep, but the man didn't...

This prisoner likes to eat dumplings very much. In order to make dumplings conveniently, he has a meat grinder at home...

When the police went to his home to investigate, there were two freezers in his living room, inside the freezers were stacks of dumplings, full of dumplings..."

The middle-aged bailiff looked at the river not far away, his eyes were in a daze, and he said,

"... Finally, when we asked him if he had any last words or letters to pass on, he held a bowl of soup in his hand, looked at us with a smile and said, 'Dumplings are delicious.'"

While talking, the middle-aged bailiff fell silent again,

The noise around him seemed to be approaching again.

"...In the end, when we escorted him to the execution ground, he was still smiling."

The middle-aged bailiff moved his eyes slightly upwards, looked further away, and remained silent for a long time before continuing,

"...It's over there, on the other side of the river, near the foot of the mountain near the urban area, that's the execution ground...it was there more than [-] years ago, and it's still there now."

The middle-aged bailiff looked at the distance across the river and said,

Lian Ge looked at the distance, or the bustling city dotted with lights, or the dark night, and didn't say much, listening quietly to the middle-aged bailiff's narration,

……

"...That time, he was executed by shooting from behind. He was escorted by two other elder brothers, pressed in front of me, with his back to me, kneeling on the ground with his head hanging...he raised his gun At that time, it was like watching the big brother raise the gun for the first time. My whole body was a little hairy and I felt a little flustered... I just lifted the gun like that, and moved the muzzle to the back of the prisoner's head little by little. The muzzle of the gun When I touched the back of his head, I felt a little uncomfortable all over. It didn't feel like I touched him with the muzzle of a gun, but rather like my own hand touched the back of his head, and my whole body froze..."

The middle-aged bailiff narrated, the voice of the voice was mixed with the noisy voices of diners around the table,

"...The old captain stood next to me, gave me a countdown time, and gestured beside me from ten. I just held the gun in my hand, feeling that the gun in my hand was getting heavier and heavier, as if it took a lot of effort to hold on.

When the old captain finished counting the last number, he didn't make any more gestures. He stood next to me and shouted 'shoot', and then... before I could react, the gun in my hand went off.

The order made me pull the trigger reflexively, and the bullet shot into the back of the prisoner's head... However, the prisoner did not die immediately.

He didn't make any sound, but his whole body was twitching and curled up, as if his whole body was going to be curled up, and feces and urine flowed out of his crotch in an instant...

This time, the old captain didn't speak, and a big brother next to me said something to me, "Let's shoot again."

... I fired another shot, and the prisoner was completely silent... After the forensic doctor confirmed it, he was sent to the crematorium.

I just stood there in a daze, watching the corpse being taken away... It wasn't until the big brother and the old captain came over and patted me on the shoulder that I slowly recovered.

When I finally left the execution ground, the big brother told me the same thing as the first time, he said, 'The first time has passed, and later, slowly, slowly, I will get used to it'"

While talking, the middle-aged bailiff paused again, and gradually fell silent.

Turning around slowly, the middle-aged bailiff raised his hand, retracted his gaze, and his gaze stayed on his hand,

"...After that, every year, the court always has a few death row prisoners who need to be executed, some of whom are executed by me, and some by other bailiffs.

Every once in a while, there will always be some new bailiffs who come in. Some of the new bailiffs are very excited when they execute the death penalty for the first time, and some of the new bailiffs are very scared, very nervous, and even unbearable. working in the position...

But most people, just like the big brother said, after the first time, they gradually get used to it... I am the same, after that, the number of executions is increasing, and it seems that there is not much It feels like I'm used to it... It's just that sometimes I see some younger ones, and I feel a little pity. "

While talking, the middle-aged bailiff slowly put down his hand, looked away, lowered his head, looked at the iron plate on the dining table, and fell silent.

Lian Ge turned his gaze, glanced at the middle-aged bailiff, didn't say much, turned his gaze away, and looked at the bustling city with thousands of lights in the distance again.

……

"I thought I was used to it too, until...

…At that time, I had been a law enforcement officer for several years. Except for some veteran judicial police officers in the courtyard, I already had relatively long working hours. "

Looking down at the skewers on the dining table, the middle-aged bailiff stared at the skewers and said,

"That year, at this meeting, a death sentence was sentenced in the courtyard. The executed prisoner was a young man, only about 23 or [-] years old.

It wasn't my turn to execute it, but just so happened, a bailiff asked for leave, skip him and go on to the next round, he is a newcomer, a new bailiff who has never been to the execution ground... I thought I would give the new bailiff a The process of adapting is just like the old captain did to me before, so I took the initiative to apply for that execution...

Like many death-row prisoners, they all wanted to see their family members when they were about to be executed. The young man also applied... Both the prison and the court in custody notified his parents, but his parents didn't come, maybe Is it shameful...According to the judgment, the young man raped and "killed" a girl from their neighbor's house, who was underage...

When we went to the prison, it was in the morning, with the person who did the final verification.

When we arrived, it was time for him to eat, but the prison guard went out to buy him a last meal, but he didn't move at all...

Seeing us coming, he immediately collapsed on the ground, trembling all over...I stood by, the person who made the final verification, and verified him according to the procedure...

In the end, when he was asked if he had anything else to say, or his last words, his eyes were red, and he told us that he was innocent...that he didn't kill the girl...asked us, has his appeal document come down... ..."

The middle-aged bailiff said, fell silent again, and then continued,

"...In the end, when he left the prison, another bailiff and I carried him out. He was paralyzed and had no strength at all. When he was on the car to the execution ground,

He was paralyzed there, supported by the two bailiffs on the left and right, and kept muttering some inaudible words..."

Chapter 297 Knife

"...when we got to the prison, we saw that his last meal was a barbecue...but he didn't move."

The middle-aged bailiff was talking, looking at the grilled skewers on the iron plate on the table in front of him, and fell silent for a while.

"...When he arrived at the execution ground, he was completely in a trance. His whole body was limp, his face was ashen, and he kept repeating some words... His eyes were full of despair."

Raising his head, the middle-aged bailiff looked at the other side of the river again, his eyes were fascinated, and he said,

"Still there...I shot him, he knelt in front of me, the bullet hit the back of his head, he died straight away...before he shot, he was still muttering something, I was very close to him , vaguely heard something...he said that he didn't kill the girl...and said that tomorrow is his birthday, and he will be 24 years old in one day. "

As the middle-aged bailiff spoke, he fell silent again, just staring at the other side of the river.

Lian Ge glanced at the middle-aged bailiff, didn't say much, turned his gaze away, and cast his gaze into the distance again.

In the distance, in the darkening night, more and more lights are lit up in the city, and the lights take over the sunlight of the day, like stars on the ground, illuminating the city,

All around, the hustle and bustle of the river bank, lingering in my ears, overflowed further away.

……

"...After the execution, I went to deal with the rest of the matter. After the forensic doctor confirmed his death, the body was sent to the crematorium for cremation. I called and notified his parents and asked them to come to the crematorium to see their child. On the other hand, he collected the ashes at the same time. On the other end of the phone, his mother was crying so hard that she said before hanging up that she would come to the crematorium...but in the end, neither of his parents came.

The next day, I took his ashes and sent them to his home...

It was his mother who opened the door. His mother's eyes were red and her face was pale. She looked like she had just cried... Looking at the ashes in my hand, she started crying again.

When I entered the room, I saw his father. His father was sitting on the sofa, smoking a cigarette. On the coffee table, there was a pile of cigarette butts piled up in the ashtray, which had not been cleaned up, as if the window hadn’t been opened for a long time. It's stuffy in the room...

After explaining the situation, I was about to hand over the ashes to his mother... At this time, his father stood up and said that they don't want them, and let us send them wherever they come from, and throw them away if there is no place to put them...

After his father finished speaking, he took another deep puff of the cigarette, and his mother took back the hand that was stretched out, and didn't speak, just stood there with tears falling down...

The other bailiff who went with me and I hurriedly persuaded them, saying that everyone was gone, and they were their children anyway...

Seeing the ashes in my hands, his mother cried even harder. His father didn't say a word, but turned around, with his head sullen, smoking a cigarette..."

The middle-aged bailiff said, his eyes moved up slightly, and he paused,

"...When I came out of his house, I put the ashes in his house. His mother was crying too weakly. After his father said that sentence, he didn't say a word after that. In the end, he didn't let us go again. Take the ashes with you.

That day, the one who went with me was a new bailiff. On the way back, he was not in a very high mood... He told me that he didn't feel anything when he was on the execution ground, but when he saw the prisoner's family, he couldn't bear it. the...

I told him the same thing that the big brother said to me before, and I said, it's okay, the first time has passed, and I will get used to it slowly. "

While talking, the middle-aged bailiff turned his head back again, fell silent for a while, his eyes were in a trance, looking at the tables of diners eating barbecue and talking at the night stall,

"... After that, that execution slowly faded in my mind, and there were always some new executions to be done... At that time, I was used to it. The new bailiff, after watching it again, executed it again After trying it once, like me, slowly, I got used to it..."

"That's it... time, just passing by like that... I gradually stopped counting deliberately, how many executions I have done... But I still remember it very clearly."

While talking, the middle-aged bailiff looked at the bustling night stand, and the middle-aged bailiff fell silent again, his eyes were ecstatic, as if he was lost in memory,

"...Xiao Xiao, is the barbecue delicious... delicious!"

"...Come on, come on, don't talk about this, let's have a bunch of strings..."

Amidst the din, the middle-aged bailiff was silent for a long time before speaking again,

"... About ten years ago, the court sentenced another death sentence. The death row inmate was an old man, about 60 years old. He was charged with multiple rapes and murders... One of which was executed by me back then. The crime committed by the young man of..."

While talking, the middle-aged bailiff slowly raised his hands, staring blankly at his two hands,

"...The old man was arrested and brought to justice for two other rape and murder cases. He probably felt that he would not survive. It was like showing off, and he shook off all the things he had done in the past, including that I had already killed him." The young man who committed the crime..."

The middle-aged bailiff fell silent again, just staring blankly at his hands,

"...that young man didn't deserve to die, but I killed him... I froze when the court heard this, I thought I should have forgotten what that young man looked like...but no, He is in my mind, very clear, I can still remember his face ashen, trembling, I can still remember what he said before I shot..."

Said again, the middle-aged bailiff trembled slightly with his raised hands,

"...He said he will be 24 in one day..."

"...The court trial ended that day, the old man was sentenced to death, and I seemed to have been sentenced... That night, my mind was full of the image of that young man, from the prison, to the execution ground, in the To his parents... So I still remember so clearly."