If you are asked to live broadcast fortune-telling, will you compete with the King of Hell?

[Fortunately, I found out early and haven't confessed yet, so I can make up for it. If I find out after I bring my partner home to meet my parents, it will be too embarrassing...]

[No, does the other party know that you are relatives?]

[Probably not. If you have relatives on your grandfather's side during the Chinese New Year, you may be familiar with them, but it is difficult to recognize relatives on your grandmother's side. For example, in my family, the people who come to celebrate my grandmother's birthday are usually my grandmother's brothers and sisters, or nephews, but I won't know the next generation.]

[Help me, it seems that I have to ask who my grandmother is before I fall in love! It doesn't matter at ordinary times, but when you get married, your grandfather's sisters will come, and your parents' sisters will also come. If you count the relatives, some of them are not far away, but they just don't interact often.]

[Alas, I understand the OP's frustration. Not to mention relatives you haven't met, even relatives you have met, if you haven't seen them for a few years, it's the same. Four or five years ago, we went to visit relatives during the Spring Festival. On the way, we saw a tall, white, handsome guy. At that moment, my face control was instantly moved. It turned out that he was my uncle's eldest son, that is, my eldest cousin! [Laughing and crying]]

[Last time I went to Cha Baidao, I saw a handsome boy who kept staring at me. I was hesitating whether to approach him. After a while, he said, Aunt, don't you recognize me? I.]

[This has to be said about me. After my nephew went to work, his family urged him to find a girlfriend. He said, don't worry, I have a crush on a girl. When my family asked him what his name was, he said my name. My eldest aunt wanted to beat him to death. My own aunt knew him, but I only dared to say it anonymously. It's too embarrassing! 】

【I used to think that this kind of thing only happened when shooting short videos, until this year's Chinese New Year... There were really five tall handsome guys sitting in my living room, really five tall handsome guys, so pleasing to the eye, but they had nothing to do with me, [disdain] because they were all sons of my relatives, they all called me aunt or aunt, don't ask me why I didn't know them, because it was mainly because my parents had a good relationship with his parents and we were all studying outside, and we basically didn't see each other for a year [goodbye]】

【At least, the one you are looking at is still single, mine is even more explosive, I went to a banquet on National Day last year, and saw a very handsome boy taking pictures for my sister, my sister said that was your cousin's husband {speechless expression}】

【I was waiting for the elevator that day, and saw a handsome boy, 180+ thin, tall and white, I took out my phone, and he said, sister, are you on vacation? My uncle's son, I haven't seen him for half a year, I didn't recognize him. I really am, (I even suspected that he had guessed it, so he spoke in advance, otherwise it would be so embarrassing later)]

[This reminds me of a cousin of mine. She went home, and then met a handsome guy in the car, ran to flirt with him, and the key is that the handsome guy flirted back, and then the two flirted with each other all the way until they returned to the same door. My cousin was stunned, and my cousin was also stunned. It turned out that this was my sister {laughing to death}]

[No wonder the elderly are so keen on visiting relatives during the Chinese New Year. You thought it was for eating, but it turned out to be for recognizing faces. ]

PS: The material is taken from a real online event.

Chapter 149 A cat that can speak human language (modified)

2024-10-11 16:17:13 Author: Yuzi Huangle

[Elders: What is the connotation of visiting relatives during the Chinese New Year? It means that these boys/girls cannot be touched! You can talk about them outside, but you can't talk about them here! 】

【This is also good. Being lovers still means you may break up, but being relatives means you can be together forever, hahahahahaha】

【You are all relatives, which is acceptable. I used to date someone with the same surname, but my parents refused to agree, saying that we were from the same ancestor, and we broke up later. 】

【I remember that studies have shown that people of the opposite sex who are related by blood but do not live together will be attracted to each other, and their favorability will be higher. It seems to be called genetic sexual attraction. So don't be sad, brother. You think you like her, but it is actually your genes that choose her. 】

Seeing the barrage, the boy's face eased.

"Forget it, let's just be friends in the future."

"There are beautiful women everywhere in the world, remember to find out clearly in the future." Su Chen couldn't help but joke.

【Brother, come and recite with me, refuse to fall in love, start with me, no woman in my heart, draw the sword and become a god, the wise do not fall in love, and build a beautiful China. You look at the photo ten thousand times, she is not yours, but you read the book ten thousand times, the knowledge is yours. 】

【What are you talking about? It's not that scary. It's just a small episode. Take a nap. It's a new day tomorrow. Fight for the beautiful motherland. 】

【I envied you at first, but now I sympathize with you. However, I still want to say, brother, keep going! 】

At the same time.

The family ancestral hall of Yijiang Chunshui.

Six children knelt neatly to welcome the bamboo shoots and fried meat.

The small bamboo sticks in the hands of several adults kept waving.

The crying and shouting were loud and small, one after another, so lively.

These children cried so miserably, but none of the parents standing by stepped forward to stop them.

They even said angrily: "No wonder you saw the smoke coming out of the ancestral tomb first. I still find it strange that a good ancestral tomb can still smoke!"

This was at the scene when the incident happened. No wonder no one else was seen.

At first, the oldest child happily told them that he saw smoke coming out of the ancestral tomb that day.

They thought it was just children talking nonsense.

Later, a villager who went to worship his ancestors also saw it, and they realized that this matter was very serious.

Even when they went to check what was going on, these bastards also put dry ice!

After that thing turned into fog, there was no trace left.

It's a shame they turned over the grave to find out the truth.

What a sin!

"Hit! Let them remember this for a long time!"

Yijiang Chunshui was still very angry: "Do you dare to put dry ice in the future?"

"Wow wow wow... I don't dare anymore, I won't dare anymore..."

The eldest child said blankly: "How about putting something else in?"

I felt a bit regretful, because if we don’t let dry ice go, I’d rather set off firecrackers.

"Fight, keep fighting, it seems the blow is too gentle."

"Oh, no, I won't let go of anything. Wuwuwu."

Several children cried and shouted one after another.

Yijiang Chunshui gritted his teeth and said, "Are you still jumping on the grave?"

"Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

"You're still firing up cannons inside! I've turned against you! Who lit it up?"

As Yijiang Chunshui asked.

Several children immediately pointed at each other.

This look.

Except for the youngest girl who was too scared to play, the others all participated.

So, these five had another meal of fried pork with bamboo shoots.

On this day, the sound of ghosts crying and howling like wolves could be heard far away.

The people in the village only thought that this family was crazy for beating their children like that.

But only they themselves know that they earned this beating based on their ability.

If netizens in the live broadcast room see it.

They would only gloat about their misfortune and say that beating a child in the ancestral hall is to show the ancestors.

After finishing the second hexagram, Su Chen just tapped the third lucky person's profile picture and immediately sent the invitation to Lian Mai.

But just after the connection was successfully established, the other side of the screen was completely dark, and the person asking for help could not be seen at all.

Su Chen asked tentatively: "Hello?"

However, a boy's voice suddenly rang from the other end of the phone, "Get up! Don't even think about pretending to be dead!"

This loud voice made the water friends in the live broadcast room confused.

What's going on?

Live broadcast killing people at night?

Suddenly the camera turned and a young man appeared on the screen.

"Hello, anchor, my name is Chen Junnan." The person who spoke was handsome and had a ruthless look on his face, but he looked a little haggard and obviously didn't sleep well.

At this time, he was reaching out to scratch his somewhat messy hair.

[Oh, he’s a handsome boy! Welcome handsome boy. 】

[With this fame, it seems that my parents are very confident. When a handsome man comes, get out of the way! ! ! 】

[The lucky one is a boy again. It seems that tonight is a boys’ party.]

[Little brother, are you also looking for marriage? 】

"Ah, no, it's not." Chen Junnan shook his head like a rattle when he saw the barrage.

Then he looked at Su Chen and said cautiously:

"Anchor, I suspect that my Beibei has become a sperm."

What?

Becoming a sperm?

Tonight's live broadcast was a bit crazy.

Netizens were stunned.

[Why don’t you understand? Is your Beibei your partner or someone else? 】

[Is the person upstairs confused? Can a person become a spirit? You can only become a ghost or an immortal. 】

[That’s not necessarily the case. If you practice some secret or evil arts, you are not a human being but a goblin. 】

【.】

"I'm sorry, I didn't make it clear. It's my Beibei."

Chen Junnan turned the camera of his mobile phone in another direction, and what appeared on the screen was a golden retriever kitten.

[Wow, what a cute cat. 】

[Brother, this is your fault. If you don’t want to support me, you can just say so. You can’t bully others and just spread rumors if you can’t speak. 】

[It just so happens that my girlfriend wants to keep a pet. How about you keep one for me? 】

[You look so handsome, but you end up bullying small animals. It’s so unloving! 】

"Why did you say it became a spirit?" It was Su Chen who came to the rescue.

"No, no, something weird happened."

"One time in the middle of the night, with my eyes closed but not asleep, I heard Beibei calling me 'husband'. I didn't care at the time and thought I was hallucinating."

"Later, I discovered several times that when I closed my eyes, it thought I was asleep and called me 'husband'."

[My sister-in-law doesn’t look like a local. 】

[Be brave, my sister-in-law doesn’t look human! 】

[What are you bold about? It’s just sister-in-law Cat, Beibei: I don’t want to be your woman, I want to be your wife. 】