I Decided To Become a Perfect Girl

7 – 5 years old (7)

4 Days before the commercial shoot

I went out on a picnic with my family on the weekend to celebrate the long-awaited spring.

I lie down on a mat in the park near my house and look up at the sky.

As I follow the passing clouds with my eyes, my wandering thoughts disappear.

When I stare at the cloud, I think of my previous life.

In my previous life, when I was young, there were no smartphones and no computers in my house.

So, when I was alone at home, I had to spend time delusional or playing with toys.

And eventually, when I got tired of it, I would go out to the window, spread out a blanket on the sunlit floor, and lie down on it, chasing the passing clouds with my eyes and taking a nap.

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But as I got older and my life got busier, I never looked up at the sky for a long time.

I live a new life again and the sky I look at is blue and clear only after I get young.

My mom and dad also sit next to me and talk.

Her mother, who is still fresh in her body and mind, said as she brushed her hair in the spring breeze.

“The weather is nice. My brother and I used to go on dates like this every spring.”

“I see, Do-hee didn’t come out often because it was annoying, but it’s nice to come out, Do-hee?”

“Yeah, not bad.”

Dad said with a laugh.

“Do-hee, come to work and stand in front of Forsythia. I’ll take a picture for you.”

“Sure.”

“Let’s come to work and stand together.”

“Yeah~”

Mom answered cheerfully and she stood next to me.

Looking at her mother, it seems that she grew up being loved without wrinkles all her life.

Even though I am the parents of my current life, my father and mother, it seems that deep in my heart I still have a sense of entitlement from my previous life where I am jealous of those who have been loved.

“Do-hee, how is your mother?”

Mom plucked her azalea that was next to her and put it in her ear and asked me with a warm smile.

“It’s pretty, it’s no different from a very spring girl~”

“hahahahaha, where did you learn that?”

My mother laughed and put a flower in my ear.

“hahahaha, my daughter is also a perfect spring girl, right?”

“It’s because I look like my mother.”

My lovely mother and I are talking about Doran Doran, but Dad breaks the spell.

“Oh, my daughter and wife are so pretty. It is indistinguishable from flowers.”

“Wow, that comment sucks.”

I pretended to throw up at my dad’s comment.

“Ah, I’m ashamed. Is it a perfect flower?”

On the other hand, my mother makes a calyx with her hands because she is good at such comments.

Usually, after a child is born, parents will have less time to love each other because they are taking care of the child, but I must have made it so comfortable.

‘Marriage is very much like dating because it makes you feel comfortable, right?’

I need a little brother right away to give me a taste of parenting hell.

Leaving behind my mother and father’s love affair, I went to the mat.

‘I’m going to forget the lunch box…’

However, if I am alone even for a moment, my mom and dad, who have nothing to do with this, come and hug me.

“Why is my daughter eating alone?”

“Okay, let’s eat together with Dad~”

The corners of my mouth go up a little from the interest that is full of love, but it’s hard because I receive too much… When will my brother be born…

On the way home after a picnic

I was forced to walk with one hand held by my mother and the other by my father.

I’m tired even on the way home.

My mother smiled and asked me.

“Did you have fun today?”

“Uh. But let go of my hand.”

My mother ignored her words.

“Yes, let’s come out often. When Mommy was pregnant with you, she used to go for walks in the park with Daddy.”

“Uh, okay, let go of my hand now. My arm hurts.”

“Brother, come to think of it, it’s past my period, but I’m not doing it?”

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah, I forgot my period because I was thinking about filming a commercial for Dohee.”

Kyaa, you finally came, brother.

The bed is so noisy every night, but if it still doesn’t come up, there’s a problem with your father’s seed.

Mom said, staring at her father with a thrilled expression.

“I need to go home and check it out.”

Dad took her mother in her arms with a big smile.

But why didn’t you let go of my hand?

I was stuck in the middle of my mom and dad.

“Keuk, I’m dying of sleep. Let go quickly.”

“I really love you honey.”

“It hasn’t been decided yet. Hi-Hi…”

“Okay, let go of this hand and release it. Kek”

Even after the hug, I was dragged home with my hands still intact.

As soon as I got home, my mother took a pregnancy test and the result was two lines.

When my mother came out in two lines, my father and mother were busy embracing each other, and I, not wanting to look at them, closed the door and went into the room.

My side is cold today.

It is a day that misses the piano teacher’s heart.

I decided to crawl under the bed and watch YouTube to forget my loneliness.

The place under the bed where I used to avoid Mom and Dad is now my hiding place.

Haa, who should I date with in this life?

My identity as a man with a male mind and a female body is ambiguous.

One of my goals in my previous life was to have a child who looked like me.

I wanted to give my unborn child as much love as the love I never received.

Now I have to get pregnant to achieve this, damn it.

I don’t know, I have a lot of time to think about it anyway.

For now, my goal is to become a perfect person.

I crawled out of bed to empty my thoughts, finished my daily routine, and went to sleep.

On the day of the commercial shoot,

I arrived at the commercial set with my mom.

The man whom we met before and signed a contract greets us as soon as he sees us when we arrive.

“Oh, you’re here.”

“Oh hello~”

“How have you been, Dohee?”

“Yes.”

I am a mother who disapproves of my refreshing greeting that dismissed the pleasant excitement with one word.

“Bitter, Lee Do-hee. Say hello again politely. Are you reaching your father?”

Oh that’s not right.

“Calm down, mother. The girl is at fault.”

I bowed politely at 90 degrees.

“Mister, hello~”

“hahahahaha, okay, Dohee, let’s have a good shoot today? Come on, I’ll introduce you to the cinematographer.”

Following the uncle, my mother and I went to say hello to the director.

“This is director Kwon Dong-hyun, who will be filming today. Ah, director, this is Do-hee and Do-hee’s mother, who will be filming today.”

“Ah. Yes, hello.”

“Hello director, it’s our first time filming, so please take care of me even if it’s not enough.”

I immediately followed my mother and greeted her politely.

You should look good to the director.

When the mother seems to be more nervous than I am, the advertisement company man relaxes her mother.

“You don’t have to worry about filming. Our director is a veteran, so he’s good at filming with children.”

“Oh yes, you don’t have to worry. Let’s go ahead and prepare for the shoot. You can follow the staff here.”

The director seems to have a pretty blunt personality.

Is it okay to shoot well with children?

“Yes, you can follow me.”

“Oh, I see. Dohee, let’s go.”

“Huh.”

My mom and I followed the staff to the dressing room.

“Ms. Eunseo, since we’re filming today, you just have to stick to the concept you said.”

“Yes, I understand.”

The staff gave the instructions and left the dressing room.

A dressing room employee called Eunseo came up to me and said hello.

“Hello~ My sister is Eunseo Seo. What’s the princess’s name?”

“I’m Dohee.”

It’s disgusting to be called a princess from the beginning.

“Ahahahaha.. Really? Does Dohee look shy?”

“Yes.”

“hahahahaha… So you come to Dohee’s job and put on makeup and get dressed?”

“I’m sorry. My daughter isn’t polite today. I’ll go home and scold her.”

“I made a mistake, mother, sir. Hello, thank you!”

“Pu-Hup, let’s sit down for Do-hee.”

“Yes.”

I sat down at my vanity table and started getting some professional touches.

I don’t know what kind of 5-year-old kid they put this on.

After the makeup is finished, the texture of the skin becomes smoother and my baby’s already white skin looks clearer and more transparent.

“Kyaaak, she’s a complete doll. How can she look pretty even when she wears something so basic?”

It’s okay to look at myself in the mirror.

“Okay then, shall we come and get dressed?”

“I can wear the clothes myself.”

I don’t want to show my skin to strangers.

“It’s because my sister has to look at it while styling it. Will she wear it?”

“I can wear it alone.”

“Oh, Do-hee Lee, should I listen to the teacher?”

My virginity… I wanted to give it to my piano teacher.

After my innocent body was shown to a lot of strangers,

Even I am surprised to see myself dressed up in the mirror.

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“Eh…? Is this watashi…?”

‘A little… Lovely?’

I put on makeup and dressed up nicely.

This body descended here…

You no longer have to worry about your future partner.

The answer was right in front of me.

I will love myself.

I’m going to be a crazy narcissist.

‘Crazy Lee Do-hee take me, I’m yours and you’re mine.’

“Oh, the cutest baby I’ve ever seen~”

Ah, I agree.

Your wife and daughter have pretty good eyes.

“Ayu, if it wasn’t cute, I’d have already hit her several times.”

I glared at my mother.

There is no place to hit this fragile body.

“Now that everything is ready, you can go out and wait.”

“Yeah!!”

“It’s rude again, Lee Do-hee.”

“Yes.”

I went out and sat down on a chair, and a staff member came and gave me the script.

“You just need to memorize this.”

“Yes”

Sitting in a chair and reading the script, my mother came and watched it with me.

“Oh~ the script looks like this. Can our princess do well?”

“Of course, it’s enough to drink a drink, make a pretty face, and say one line.”

“Then, shall we practice?”

“That’s right.”

I pretended to drink after cutely holding the imaginary glass with both hands.

Refreshing expression after drinking,

And the closing lines.

“Just hit it.”

“Hey! That’s not Lee Do-hee’s line! Where do you keep learning those words?

“Yes.”

“Huh… Let’s try it one more time?”

I raised my imaginary cup with both hands and drank it again, then shouted out lines with a surprised expression because it was delicious.

“Just one more drink!”

My mother hit her head with honey chestnuts as if she couldn’t stand it.

” Evil! “

I’m embarrassed.

All sorts of thoughts run through my head.

‘Oh, it hurts. It’s the first time I’ve been hit.’

‘There’s no corner to hit on this body, so hit me.’

‘But why do I keep crying?’

Mysteriously, my mind seems to be fine, but my body is out of control.

I definitely don’t want to cry, but my body doesn’t.

My body reflexively sheds tears at the pain I feel in my head.

I try to swallow the tears with my nose.

“Sigh…Suck…Sucks…Sucks.”

“Oh, Dohee, are you crying? Don’t cry.”

As if her mother’s words became a catalyst, her tears burst out.

“Pueeeng”

My mother was very embarrassed when I cried, even when I was a baby.

“Uh… Mom, I’m sorry, Do-hee, my princess. Tuk, Mom was wrong.”

But when someone comforts me, I want to cry even more.

“Pueeng”

Kyaa, but how can my crying sound be cute?

Perfect, really.

But when will the crying stop?