Florida Man's General Store in Cultivation World



Chapter 97 – Vegan Cops Stalk Florida Man for Eating Meat at Home

After making a quick work on the rabbit trent king, Leo butchered the corpse, searching for the quest item that the system mentioned. However, he couldn't find it anywhere. The only thing that came out from the corpse was the 10th-grade monster core.

"Where is the gnosis thingy?"

Leo grumbled while he looked at the quest menu.

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Primary Objectives: 

1 – Kill Rabbit Trent King.

2 – Absorb Gnosis of Rabbit Trent King.

Secondary Objective:

1 – Locate Entity Fate Crystal in Sweet Dream Mushroom Forest

2 – Absorb Entity Fate Crystal.

Exploration Rewards: 3 Free Tickets, Ownership of Planet Rabbit Trent A-3

Secondary Rewards: 1 Lucky Draw

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After rereading the description, Leo got new inspiration. As the quest wanted him to absorb the gnosis, he might as well eat the entire corpse of this monster.

"Oh well. Nom-Nom mother-trucker!"

Leo started by taking a bite of the withered vines. He sat there, eating every piece that he could get. As for Taxi, he stood there, gazing at Leo in astonishment and respect.

"… Smash?"

Taxi lowered its head, wanting to take a piece, too. However, as it licked the mutated blood of the rabbit trent king, he flinched.

Leo glanced at the horse and warned him, "Be careful about that. Mutated blood is full of cancer cells. You're going to get cancer if you eat that."

"Smash?! D:"

"Of course not. That ain't your food. It's mine. Only I can eat it."

Taxi backed away from the corpse. It looked around if there was anything else he could do. Then, it found the pile of rabbit trent king's collections, piling into a mountain.

Most of them were fruits. At a glance, they looked similar to dragon fruits, which were common in Southeast Asia in the modern world. However, it was Taxi's first time seeing these edible goodies.

Leo also sneaked glances at the white dragon fruits. They were bigger than apples, but their skin looked like flower petals, looking majestic and unique. They glittered in white light, emitting strong yang Qi.

Upon looking carefully, Leo and Taxi noticed a tall plant with droopy long leaves, similar to aloe vera leaves. It stood in the middle of dragon fruits. Similar to its offspring, the leaves were white, and they were full of yang Qi. However, from the perspective of Leo, the leaves looked like LED lights.

PLOP

PLOP

Dragon fruits kept coming out from the plant. Every minute, a new fruit was born and fell off the plant. However, the old fruits never withered as they gathered Qi from the environment to sustain and prolong their life.

Leo ate the corpse while he frowned at the weird plant and the fruits. He asked Taxi.

"Do you know what those are?"

"…Smash. :("

"So, you don't know too?"

"Smash? :D"

"Fine. Eat them if you can."

"SMASH! XD"

Taxi dashed toward the piles of fruits. He took one in his mouth and chewed it whole. As soon as his teeth cut through the skin, his taste buds perceived the sweet and jelly-like soft texture of the white seed.

It was delicious!

However, there was something wrong with the fruit. Taxi swallowed half of it and spat the remaining out. He neighed and collapsed on the floor.

Leo stopped eating the withered branch of rabbit trent king. He smirked at Taxi, "You got smashed, it seems. How was it, donkey?"

Taxi didn't answer. He gestured to Leo with his eyes, challenging his new boss to eat it himself.

Leo shrugged and slapped his bare hand on the pony's belly. He wasn't afraid that Taxi would mutate as his skin already touched this guy several times when he was riding him – Taxi was immune to Leo's radiation.

Picking up one of the fruits, Leo flipped it around and inspected it. He vaguely remembered that the normal version of these fruit cost about 6-7 USD each during the pre-nuclear war. He also read on the internet somewhere that farmers who grew those fruits in Asia only sold them for less than a dollar per kg.

Thinking of the past, Leo had a complicated feeling. He somewhat wished that the war would have happened, but the other side of him was grateful that he survived and lived until this day.

"Cheers. For humanity. For immortality, and for me."

Leo looked up and raised the fruit, paying homage to eight billion souls that died in the past. Then, without peeling it, he took a bite.

"…"

Nothing happened. Leo kept eating it without spitting the black seeds out. Moreover, the fruit didn't mutate even though it touched his skin and his saliva.

After swallowing everything, Leo cleaned his hands by swiping them with his hazmat pants. He looked at Taxi in confusion.

"You're weak, donkey. I don't feel anything."

"…Smash?!"

"Yeah, I don't have a stomach ache like you."

Leo scoffed and glanced at his system menu, wondering what kind of perk he got from the fruit.

<Your lifespan has increased by 1 year.>

The reward was insignificant. He would rather eat raw monster meat or rotten rabbit trent as they offered more per bite.

Taxi noticed that Leo disregarded the fruits, and he slowly got back up. Although he had stomach pain, he still wanted to eat more.

Unbeknownst to Leo, Taxi gained so much Yang Qi from the fruit. He believed that he got about 10 years' worth of cultivation after eating half of the white dragon fruit. However, his dantian and monster core couldn't handle the flood of energy, causing his stomach to repel some of the yang Qi out.

Not wanting to lose to Leo, Taxi mustered his strength to eat the remaining fruit that he had spat earlier.

.

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While Leo and Taxi took their time on the top of the pagoda, Situ Nantian regained his bearing. He flew back to the top of the pagoda to see who interfered with him.

Floating 10 meters away from the top floor's window, Situ Nantian looked at the people inside. Then, he spotted a 9th-stage monster, a thunder unicorn. Next to the monster was an old man with a rainbow aura.

Situ Nantian narrowed his eyes for a moment. As he couldn't find Leo's dao avatar, he was on guard.

'Where is his dao avatar? Who is he? Why haven't I seen him before? I know all quasi-immortal and soul transformation cultivators in the main continent and those west barbarians. How come I haven't seen this guy before? He seems like another quasi-immortal…"

He contemplated for a moment before he recalled some of the reports regarding a certain Florida Man.

Remembering the reports, Situ Nantian figured out the identity of the person in the pagoda tower. He smirked.

'I see. This is the rumored immortal of the Magpie City. Well, I respect you. I vaguely sensed the presence of an immortal beast, but you managed to kill it. I won't find trouble with you. However, it's another story if you find the gnosis and the fate crystal!'

Situ Nantian continued to lurk in the sky, waiting for Leo to find the right item. As for his subordinates, they quickly caught up with their grand elder and waited for new instructions.

"You stay out of this. I'll handle it myself. Be prepared to leave on a signal."

"…Yes, grand elder."

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One hour later, nothing changed. Leo kept on eating the monster's corpse. As for the unicorn, it lay on the floor, taking a nap after food. It snored and clattered its teeth.

Situ Nantian frowned as he found Leo and Taxi obnoxious. Still, he waited for them to find the fate crystal and the gnosis.

Another hour passed, yet, Leo hadn't finished eating the monster. 80% of the massive corpse remained, and Leo couldn't eat anymore. He sat down and patted his bloated belly. Then, he closed his eyes, taking a short nap.

"…"

Situ Nantian was annoyed. He had the urge to enter the building through the window. However, he was afraid of Leo's hidden strength. Moreover, he didn't know if the pagoda had a defensive mechanism that could prevent outsiders from entering the tower from the sky.

Four hours later, Leo stretched and yawned. He rubbed his eyes and shook his head.

"Aw, that was a good nap. Alright. Time to nom-nom again."

Hearing Leo's words, Situ Nantian flinched. Blood veins under his facial skin swelled, and his face reddened in anger. He took a deep breath to calm down.

'Just be done with the corpse, Florida Man! Stop wasting my time!'

Despite being angry, Situ Nantian held it in and waited patiently. Unfortunately, he underestimated Leo's endurance and greediness.

.

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DING

<Your lifespan has increased by 10 years.>

<Your lifespan has increased by 10 years.>

<Your lifespan has increased by 10 years.>

Leo hummed as he enjoyed eating the rabbit trent king's withered corpse. Each bite netted him 10 years of lifespan, which was a lot better than golden sand bananas or white dragon fruits. Although the taste was disgusting, Leo loved nutritious food.

While eating, Leo rubbed his nose and closed his eyes. He already sensed a group of people floating outside the windows. However, he didn't bother attacking them as he couldn't gain lifespan from other humans in this place.

"Just keep watching, you dum-dum wet bananas. Anyway, time for… the disgusting part."

Leo looked at the innards of the rabbit trent king. He thought that its body was made of wood, but it had innards and organs, made of wood!

He picked up a long intestine, which looked like withered vines. He broke it into a small piece and put it in his mouth.

As Leo had guessed, it literally tasted like rotten moldy seaweed.

"Yuck. Jesus Christ. What did you eat to smell like this?!"

Taxi smirked and gestured with his head, looking at the pile of dragon fruits. Leo noticed the horse's reaction and stared at the plant and useless fruits.

"Meh. A vegan, I see. You were malnourished, you dum-dum rabbit!"

Leo kept eating the intestine vines. Then, he glanced at the notification message window.

<Your lifespan has increased by 10 years.>

<Your lifespan has increased by 10 years.>

He felt a bit better. Seeing the number, Leo was encouraged to keep going. He raised his arms and shouted.

"LET'S DO THIS! I'LL FINISH THIS THING WITHIN TOMORROW!"

.

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Outside the pagoda, Situ Nantian almost fell from the sky. He covered his face and gritted his teeth.

'HOW LONG ARE YOU PLANNING TO WASTE YOUR TIME!? WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! WHY ARE YOU EATING A DISGUSTING MONSTER CORPSE!?'

Situ Nantian was so infuriated that he wanted to kill somebody. He clenched his fist, getting ready to launch a surprise attack on Leo.

KLUK-KLUK

But then, Situ Nantian's eyes found a rolling red ball, which fell off Leo's pocket.

"Hmm?"

That was the monster core of an immortal beast, a 10th-stage monster core!

Situ Nantian narrowed his eyes. He wondered if it was related to the fate crystal that was mentioned in the book. His eyes followed the orb.

KLUK-KLUK

The clear red orb rolled toward the pile of white dragon fruits. As soon as the orb touched them, the fruits vanished into the orb.

"!!!"

Situ Nantian widened his eyes in astonishment. He had never seen a weird monster core like that before.

'What is that thing?'

Curious, Situ Nantian approached one of the windows, close to the white dragon fruit plant. As he got closer, he found a mysterious orb, which was dangling behind the white plant, hiding among the dragon fruits.

At a glance, it looked like an eyeball. However, its surface was similar to smooth shining glass.

The glass eyeball looked at Situ Nantian. Then, it looked left and right.

PLOP

The eyeball detached from the plant. Then, it vanished into a pile of dragon fruits.

Situ Nantian paused for a moment before he widely grinned. He reopened the book to compare the image.

It looked different. The heavenly fate crystal in the book was a clear marble ball the size of a grain or a thumb. However, the eyeball earlier was as big as a fist.

"…"

Situ Nantian narrowed his eyes.

He wanted that eyeball. Even though it might not be the fate crystal that he wanted, he still wanted the eyeball to experiment on it.