First Stygian Diviner:Apocalypse
8 Just keep breathing...
Everything went back to hit Isiah again, and this time it hurt him like hell for sure, he couldn't stand looking at his father's face because the only thing he was seeing in that moment was his real father, the one that sacrificed him because of his cult, to prove a point and enjoy the authority and its benefits afterwards .
That day Isiah felt broken like he never did before, he was stabbed for the second time when he promised to himself that he won't fall for the blood trap, he always kept his guards up, but somehow even with that everything hurt .
Isiah walked to a grass field near his house, it was an open place yet no one seemed to visit it Anyway, he laid down on the grass and started looking at the sky.
The distance between the two regions was huge, yet because of its size people from this place seem to see it close enough .
That was very tempting to make people work more on themselves, to level up, to ascend .
He looked at the region above him for a long time, until his eyes started to tear, he wanted to leave this place so much that his hurt hurted him .
The rain started to pour without notice which made him curse quietly. He hated this weather, this place, his family, his neighbors, his classmates, his school ….Everything was stained with black on his eyes, and he couldn't wait to have power to leave this place forever .
The rain was heavy and it made it very difficult for him to breathe so he sat and leant, his elbows rested on his knees, he was tired yet he didn't have the luxury to rest when his world had already fallen apart for the second time .
Isiah was a quiet kid, he learnt his lesson a while back, even if you are blood you need to behave yourself, keep your opinion to yourself, don't argue, don't takes sides nor decisions, keep your eyes closed no matter what you see, remind yourself that you are responsible for higher purposes, you are never number one, and you are always the reason to blame when things go wrong .
Isiah felt like it was difficult for him to breath, it felt like he was having a heart attack, he was too scared to resist, he touched the place of his heart with tears in his eyes, he screamed but no one was listening, it was the end all over again, his heart was going to crush, the sweat was on his forehead, the air felt compressed for the time following, all he could do was laying on the ground and take a look to the region above him while he took the last breath .
Even when everything was so messed up in his real life, Isiah never felt anxious to the point of fainting, this was his first time.
The moment he had that awful conversation with Johnathan, he knew explicitly that nothing changed, it is the same reality, his new parents hated him too.
He never expected much from them, he always kept their relationship superficial, and he never felt emotionally attached to them, but now he was hurt even with those precautions.
Even keeping his expectations low didn't do him good, for the second time he had to face his monsters.
When he woke up again, he opened his eyes quickly with a troubled look on his eyes, because then he remembered those terrifying moments before losing consciousness.
Isiah started to breathe slowly, deeply, and gently this time. The fact that he fainted that way reminded him of his weakness and he hated that.
For an hour he just sat there analyzing what happened to him, and the conclusion was that he had a panic attack.
On this day he collected all his courage to talk to Johnathan but that ended in a bad way, for years he wanted to have that conversation and talk about Lucas and the motives behind what he did, and where is he after what he has done but the moment he says his name his father always left and his mother ignored him.
He didn't want to push things fastly because he knew that there would be consequences if he did the wrong move or took the wrong turn.
But the age of 16 hit him differently, it was his age when he died on earth and that's why he was carried by emotions to change his new reality.
'Even in this world, I am still a loser, I was weak back then but here it is not justified, even the damn magic exists and here I am, not able to use it …no …no …banned to use it ', Isiah thought to himself.
" I knew that you would be here ", his mother interrupted his waves of thoughts.
Isiah looked very surprised to see her standing next to him. He looked at the grass beneath his feet in silence.
Lisa sat beside him immediately and said while looking at everything around but him.
"Johny told me that you guys had an argument", she said calmly.
Isiah collected his fist unintentionally without saying a word.
" Why do you want to learn magic? What kind of quest is that? didn't you learn at least one thing from all these past years ?"
Nothing, just silence.
" You can live perfectly without magic ", Lisa yelled at him as his father did.
" I know …I know that I can live without magic, but I won't survive, you killed me the day you signed that contract ", he was about to scream in pain.
"Isiah, there is no chance to learn magic, whether it is about survival or not, you are already a threat to the people here, so, just keep your mouth shut and live, why can't just do something minuscule as that, no one would care about you if you keep breathing air without getting involved with them, trust your mom "
Isiah looked at his mom's eyes then smiled sarcastically, he couldn't formulate one sentence to reply to what she said.
Living this way again ….would kill him for sure.
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