Everyone Knows I am a Good Man

This winter is destined to be unusual.

The people who wrapped themselves tightly on the street, and those in a wonderful mood encountered the ultimate test.

Mosquitoes, many, many mosquitoes.

They seem to have lost the ability to be afraid of the cold, flying wantonly in the cold winter. When they saw a person, they immediately swooped over with a posture of blood that hadn't been seen in 800 years.

An urban beauty with exquisite makeup felt a slight pain on her face, subconsciously patted it, and took it off. It was a dead mosquito bleached by loose powder, with her blood flowing out of her belly.

Urban beauty: "..."

She was shocked for a second that there were still mosquitoes in such a cold sky, and then thought of something, tremblingly took out the small mirror from her bag, opened a photo, and sure enough, the exquisite makeup was covered with blood in the mosquito's belly.

She almost didn't scream.

It took an hour to draw the full makeup! ! !

"What? The mosquito **** blood from your face? How could it be possible that people can freeze to death in such a cold day, and the mosquitoes have cooled off early."

My girlfriend heard her crying call and expressed her disbelief: "And you're still on the street and not in an air-conditioned room. Did you make a mistake?"

"No, it's really a mosquito. How could I not know what a mosquito looks like."

The best friend smiled and swiped Weibo: "Hahahahaha, are you too tired from work...fuck?!!!"

It took a long time for the urban beauty to go to the toilet to fix the makeup, but was bitten by a mosquito, and it was inevitable that a bag fell on her face. She hated the itching of her teeth, and it was really unlucky while muttering that she could be caught by mosquitoes in winter. Bite while turning on the phone.

As soon as I opened it, I saw a message sent to me by my girlfriend.

[Baby, look at the hot search on Weibo! ! 】

what?

She opened Weibo, looked at it, and was stunned.

[Dream enchantment breeds mosquitoes that are not afraid of cold, and mosquitoes can also **** blood in winter]

Urban beauty: "..."

The hand holding the phone trembled slightly.

Clicking into the topic and looking at it, you can actually see the information about the interview with Yunmei.

In the video, the young man claiming to be the secretary-general next to King Yun is talking proudly: "We have not only cultivated mosquitoes that can **** blood without fear of the cold in winter, but also changed the biological characteristics of mosquitoes. A creature, only female mosquitoes can **** blood, but the mosquitoes we breed are different."

"Our male mosquito can also **** blood! In this way, not only can you be sucked blood by mosquitoes in winter, you don't have to worry about it not sucking you when you encounter a male mosquito."

People watching the video: "..."

Who would worry about mosquitoes not sucking their own blood? ! !

"Furthermore, our mosquitoes can directly penetrate thick makeup and **** blood. At the same time, they are no longer afraid of heavy odors like ordinary mosquitoes. Even if they spray perfume, they will still **** blood. Are you surprised? Unexpected? Don't thank you, it's all our Demon should do."

All netizens: "..."

The whole country was stunned by this show operation.

[I thank you and my family...]

[I'm going to kill him! ! Ah ah ah ah I am going to kill him! ! ! Don't stop me! ! 】

[Ha ha, ha ha, ha ha ha, finally survived the spring, summer and autumn, but the winter will not let me go, ha ha ha ha. 】

[One goes crazy upstairs, drag it away, drag it away. 】

A comment was liked as popular.

[Do you know what I experienced today?

Today I found that I lost a pound and I have been losing weight. I decided to celebrate it. So I spent a huge sum of money to buy a can of Coke and put it in the refrigerator overnight. Under the warmth of the heating, I took it. Come out and plan to drink Happy Fat House Water.

Then, the pull ring broke.

The pull ring...broken.

I was dumbfounded for a few seconds, thinking it was an accident, until I saw news on the Internet saying that Demon had broken the pull ring of a batch of canned drinks. I couldn’t open it after a long time of tossing. I could only give up, pack up my mood and put on some makeup. I went out to eat, ate, went to the toilet and found that there was no paper in the toilet.

Do you understand the feeling of squatting in the toilet for half an hour before waiting for the next girl to go to the toilet?

Then I came out to find out that several demons had replaced the papers of the surrounding major businesses and public toilets with empty rolls with only one piece of paper attached to them overnight.

It's okay, I still held back my anger for the sake of the makeup on my face.

Finally, when I got off work, my boyfriend asked me to meet and said that he had carefully selected a gift for me, and said that I would like it.

I am looking forward to it! !

When he got there, his boyfriend maintained a "you will be surprised" expression, took out a beautifully packaged makeup box and handed it to me.

I opened it.

what!

What a Barbie pink lipstick!

My boyfriend gave me a Barbie pink lipstick for me who is twenty-five years old!

Can you imagine my face at the time?

The boyfriend is still talking about how he joined the "good boy training class", how he learned that girls like pink most, so lipstick must be given to fans, how to learn how to make braised pork for me who is losing weight, and how to spend it Big price, bought a deep dish! purple! color! eye! shadow! Give it to me.

Faced with a boyfriend who has paid so much, younger than me, with stars in his eyes looking forward to my surprise, I have to barely maintain a smile of "Ah, I am so happy", forcefully smile and accompany my boyfriend to finish the meal. rice.

My lovely boyfriend, after eating, he gave me another surprise and gave me a bag of Barbie powder.

I finally swallowed a mouthful of blood and went home, intending to wear short sleeves and stay comfortable at home.

Then, he was surrounded by male and female mosquitoes swarming.

Now I’m sitting in front of the computer with my bag, just wanting to quietly think about my life, and my new Barbie pink lipstick Barbie powder bag and deep purple eye shadow palette. 】

Ji Changze also saw this comment.

After seeing it, he thought for a few seconds and replied with a large size.

[Don’t call the king and call the boss: Thank you for reminding that there is heating in the north (kind smile)]

All northerners who saw this comment: "..."

They suddenly had an ominous premonition.

The next day, as everyone expected, in a certain northern area, when everyone was working in a warm room, the hard-working heater quietly stopped.

The interior is like the people in this area where the summer is over. While screaming in despair, they hurriedly bought thick quilt electric blankets and other artifacts for southerners to spend the winter.

The northerners who happily eat ice cream indoors every winter experience the southerners' winter for the first time.

The instigator Ji Changze stood on his umbrella cart, comfortably bathed in various howls and curses, opened his arms, and enjoyed the resentment gathered from all directions.

What a perfect winter.