Epic Of Caterpillar
2268 Redgaria's Grieving
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Phantasmas… I barely had time to know her, and I suppose I couldn't do the same with every single Maxima Summon every single one of my family members or allies summoned.
Not many of them ended forging a strong bond with my family members or friends, and although they are valuable allies and strong beasts, right now, only Redgaria asked for the help of his own.
My wives seem to have already kind of forgotten about theirs… So whenever they aren't summoned, they just return to the Maxima Universe. It's nothing bad, not every Summon can be as overpowered as mine.
But Redgaria was a different thing entirely, he really cared about his Maxima Summon, I suppose because he had created a much stronger bond with her in their first days.
I still remember when all my family and allies summoned their Maxima Summons when we visited Hell and had to battle those Undead invading the area from the Necrotic Plane.
Back then everyone really loved their summons, but it can't be blamed if they've fallen slightly into obscurity after everything that has happened so far.
And with he arrival of Egos, sentient equipment that can grow on its own and add a tremendous amount of stats, it was quite clear Maxima Summons were "power crept" to an extent.
It wasn't like I minded that much, my children still cared about theirs, though they were unable to summon them when they came to pick me up back in Grand Terra.
Although I could offer Maxima Summons to the rest of my allies such as Shadrach or Luminous, I doubt it would be as interesting, as they require some time to grow.
Bubu for me was obviously a big exception, but anyways, this wasn't the topic at hand.
The topic itself was Phantasmas, someone dear to Redgaria, whom I… well, barely knew.
However, even if I didn't know her well, it was me who allowed Redgaria to summon her, when I shared my Dao of Summoning fragments with everyone, they all gained the ability to summon one of them.
I honestly felt rather guilty, and furious at myself. It was my fault that she died, I was unable to help Redgaria, and I was unable to protect Phantasmas.
I promised everyone I would do everything to protect them, but at the end, I failed.
Someone died because of me, because I wanted more power, and because I brought them here to this dangerous battle against monsters beyond everything we've ever fought before.
I owe Redgaria an apology…
"I'm sorry…" I sighed. "It was all my fault, Redgaria."
"Kireina…" Redgaria's crimson eyes widened.
I spread my arms and ended hugging him.
I don't remember if I ever hugged Redgaria at all, but I had to do the bare minimum.
"I'm really sorry…" I sighed, letting his head rest in my shoulders. "It was my fault…"
"Hey! G-get off me! I…" Redgaria muttered, as he started to stutter. "I-I… Ugh… No, it wasn't your fault, Kireina… It was all my fault… Ugh… Dammit…!"
He started crying, tears falling from his eyes over my shoulders.
I don't think I've ever been in such a situation with my old rival and friend like this.
We've been always rather distant, having a more rival-like relationship than anything else.
But I suppose we're rather close at the end, much closer than I imagined.
I wanted to be there for him, to comfort him even if a little.
I know it wasn't the same, but… I would want the same if something similar happened to me.
"I was the one that brought her here… I was the one that… Ugh, that forced you into bringing me along, it was my selfishness…" Redgaria continued crying tears of regret. "I wish I wasn't such a fucking dumbass all the time… What do I get out of this?! I lost someone precious to me again…"
Redgaria started blaming himself, his hands tightly grabbing my shoulders as he continued gritting, gritting his teeth.
He had gone through a harsher life than anybody here, his childhood, everything. Until just recently, when he was given a second chance to enjoy everything now that his sister is back.
But I suppose he felt like he had to somehow provide help anyways, even if he had already fulfilled his wish to find and revive his sister.
Maybe he didn't want to disappoint her…
"It wasn't entirely your fault, Redgaria," I looked at him into his eyes. "Calm down. Phantasmas… She was a brave and strong dragon, I am sure that through her long life, she probably thought that she had finally found someone worth sacrifice her life for."
"Y-You think so…" Redgaria muttered, letting go of me, as he suddenly fell to the floor. "Why would she think such a thing? I am… I am just a good-for-nothing piece of shit… that never learns his damn place…"
"No, that's not right, Redgaria…" I sighed. "You're my friend, and you've helped me a lot too. Thank you for protecting my wives when you fought that think… Without you, maybe they wouldn't have been able to hold off as good as they did. Or maybe even…"
"Friend?" he wondered. "D-Do you truly consider me your friend, Kireina?" he muttered. "Even… even after everything?"
"I do," I smiled gently. "We were enemies, we became rivals, and… over time, you've become someone my family has grown accustomed to. Most kids call you uncle. And Zehe considers you her father too. Even Ryo seems you as some sort of uncle or grandpa figure. You created Zehe after all, and Celica, and also Truhan. You're a member of the family."
"I…" Redgaria muttered. "Is that so…"
It seemed he hadn't realized how important he might have been for other people.
The realization that he had a much larger family this entire time.
And that, despite his own self-loathing, everyone actually cared about him.
"Phantasmas really cared about you and wouldn't have been able to let you die so easily," I said. "She… She's not entirely dead either, whatever remained of her is now merged with your soul and Origin Core, right? She lives within you, friend."
"Phantasmas…"
Redgaria seemed a bit calmer, although very sorrowful, even now.
I never thought it would be so painful to see a friend cry.
I'll make sure to be at his side and bring him company as he grieves her passing.
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