Endless Debt

Bologg dragged the drunken Palmer back home. This guy was almost turned into a puddle of mud. Bologg didn't bother to care about him. He threw him on the bed. After covering him with the quilt, Bologg simply washed himself and then Returned to his room.

Turning on the desk lamp, a corner of the dark room became brighter. Bologg opened the drawer and wrote a long article in his notes. Usually, Bologg was very involved in writing, but for a while, his mind was always occupied. Difficulty settling down.

Boluoge's mood was a little confused, very confused, and he couldn't figure it out.

Fortunately, time can numb all pain. Boluogo has gradually accepted the fact that Xilin has returned, and has a strange premonition in his heart. In the near future, Boluogo will face it again. Xilin...

Borogo didn't know whether the two would remain peaceful or draw swords against each other.

"ah……"

Bologe rubbed his head vigorously. The hallucinations caused by the Requiem had disappeared for a long time. However, during this period of time, Bologe had some other problems, such as headaches and insomnia. This effect directly affected Bologe. In Luo Ge's spirit, the Gift and Time Axis cannot control these things.

Boluogo couldn't figure out why he was like this. He guessed it had something to do with his own worries. So what was on his mind? You know, in terms of life, Boluogo is an almost pure guy, as efficient as a machine.

Can't figure it out.

Boluogo sat for a long time, and the time was approaching midnight. He suddenly started to move, opened the cabinet, took out a jewelry box from a pile of "souvenirs", and took out a necklace with a ring hanging on it. with cross.

After staring at the ring and cross for a long time, Boluogo murmured to himself.

"New beginning."

Boluogo put the necklace aside, picked up a pen and paper, and started writing in a rustle. Whenever Boluogo encountered something he couldn't figure out, he liked to write down these questions, just like doing math problems. The derived formulas were written all over the papyrus paper.

"I think... I like Amu."

First, Boluogo wrote this sentence on the top of the papyrus.

This is a warm and straightforward statement, but there is no expression on Boluogo's face. He is like a nerd, as if he really treats his psychological problems as mathematical problems to find the derivation.

"Then what is like and love?"

Boluogo asked questions and then wrote his own answers to these questions. His brows were furrowed, like a scholar who was studying hard.

"From a physiological point of view, love is the sum of a series of physiological reactions, including physiological changes in hormones, neurotransmitters, etc. These physiological changes can affect psychological and behavioral performance, making it easier for people to have strong feelings. connect.

In other words, the essence of love is the secretion of hormones and the transmission of neurotransmitters.

The elevation of acetonamine and dopamine promotes a stronger characterization of the partner in love, showing material formalization and special pairing behavioral expressions. "

Boluogo paused his pen and continued writing.

“Just like incentives for mice, every time we meet, it’s a disguised reward that leads to our desire to meet.

Right, that is it.

Relevant changes in the reward system prompt subjects to display more positive behaviors. For example, when people are fascinated by rapid and intense love, they will regard their partner as their reward, as if they have won a big victory quickly. Cheer up. "

Bologg stopped writing. He felt that he had gone into a misunderstanding. These words were too rational and cold. Although it was Bologg's style, such a description was undoubtedly too "barbaric".

"Why would I instinctively want to resist Amu?"

Boluogo had a very clear understanding of himself. After thinking for a while, Boluogo wrote another sentence.

"Do I not like Aimu? This is obviously wrong. From a physiological point of view, she is indeed a 'reward', which makes my hormones secrete, my brain feels happy, and my mood feels comfortable. But why would I refuse? How about staying in this state for a long time?”

If Palmer were awake now and saw Burlogo talking to himself and writing these words, he would definitely call Burlogo a psycho.

Then he would seal these things away as souvenirs. These days, there are very few people with such wonderful mental illnesses as Bologg.

Boluogo moved his eyes to the ring and cross, and he found the problem, "Is it because of Adele?"

He continued writing along his own train of thought.

"I have actually been confused and troubled. I deeply loved Adele who has passed away. Unfortunately, my feelings for her have not been satisfied, so it is difficult to let go. At the same time, when faced with Aimu's kindness, I will I thought I had betrayed Adele’s feelings, so I resisted Aimu.”

This kind of self reminded Boluogo of a dilemma he had seen in a book, an existential dilemma.

Existential dilemmas arise from the diversity and uncertainty of life experience. This is a dilemma that humans encounter as free beings.

Everyone’s experience is different. Everyone has their own unique perspective and values. Everyone goes through stages of growth, love, life and death. These experiences shape human’s outlook on life and values, and also have an impact on the human soul. had a profound impact.

Adele has shaped Burlogo's beliefs and values, which are already an important part of his personality. But just like what Adele said in the hallucination, she is just a passer-by, she has her own life, her own Value, she cannot occupy all of Burlogo, and Burlogo cannot allow himself to be completely affected by Adele.

It's time for Borago to move out.

"I can't continue to be trapped in Adele's influence... I believe that she doesn't want to. I continue to be influenced by her. She has lived a wonderful life. My greatest reward for her is to give her Pass the value on and live a wonderful life in my own way.”

The confused mind gradually became firmer, and Boluoge gradually found a way to escape from the predicament.

From beginning to end, it was only himself that trapped Boluogo.

Borogo then wrote a passage, which he had excerpted from a book.

"The important thing is not how to avoid setbacks and painful regrets, but how to face it positively, persist in your own choices, and live firmly."

Burlogo will live.

"What should we do next?"

Borogo wrote the sentence again, circling it repeatedly and highlighting the key points.

He leaned back on the chair. After understanding his predicament, Bologna couldn't help but feel an inexplicable relief. Adele released Bologna, and Bologna also released Adele. It was It’s time to start living your own life in a real sense.

Until this moment, Bologo felt that he was really out of prison.

For a moment, many indescribable emotions emerged in his indifferent mind. Boluogo guessed that this emotion should be the so-called love.

Another figure filled Boluogo's mind little by little. He recalled the deliberate rejection of Amu when he was in trouble. So what was her mood like at that time?

Did his indifference make Aimu feel anxious and confused? Did he inadvertently make Aimu misunderstand something, causing her to fall into some kind of trouble?

Thinking of this, Boluogo suddenly became nervous, as if he suddenly woke up. Only after he got out of the predicament did he realize the many problems in the relationship.

The body's reaction gradually became clearer, and Boluoge felt a little tight in his chest and his heartbeat accelerated.

Bologg heard Aimu mention this reaction, and she often teased herself by testing Bologg's physiological state.

She would say that this is the sympathetic nervous system at work, causing the heart to beat faster, leading to an increase in heart rate, blood circulation and oxygen delivery.

Similarly, stimulation of sympathetic nerves can also cause vasoconstriction and an increase in blood pressure.

Burlogo knew that this response is similar to the way the body responds to an immediate threat—but that it can also be triggered by emotional stimulation.

Very strange,

When a person's emotions are touched, the physiological instinct is to feel threatened.

Think about it, this is more than a threat, it is simply the God of Death in another sense. She is wielding a scythe to take away your heart. From now on, you will completely belong to her.

You are willing to be tamed by her.

Bologo stood up suddenly. He could feel various hormones being secreted crazily, and a lot of questions and uneasiness immediately emerged in his mind. He had never experienced anything like this before, and he didn't know how to deal with such emotions.

I even felt a little timid and shy.

Bologg thought of many things, both good and bad. Bologg once felt that Amu was very similar to himself, so he reached out to help her. He was also hurt by Amu, but he listened to her confession. They helped each other and saved each other...

Like the cycle of chaos and order, the human mind can hatch the most evil conspiracies in the world, and can also reveal its gentle and foolish true intentions.

"damn it."

Boluogo cursed under his breath, balled up the tissue paper, and threw it into the trash can.

Sitting on the bed, Boluogo put his head in his hands. After being silent for a while, he suddenly stood up, walked out of the bedroom, changed his clothes, carefully arranged his appearance in front of the mirror, and then opened the door in the middle of the night. And out.

Bologger hates thinking, he prefers action.

Walking onto the street, the cold and clear air poured into his lungs. Boluogo woke up a little. He felt that his steps were a little light, as if he couldn't feel it, and he strode forward.

At this time, the city has become quiet. Under the illumination of street lights, the streets are empty. It seems that there is only one person in the whole world, Boluogo.

Halfway through the walk, Boluogo woke up from his surging emotions. He cursed in a low voice, wondering how long it would take him to walk out like this.

Boluogo went back, took out the Key to the Winding Path, pushed open the door and arrived at the Undead Club. The club was quiet, the ground was in a mess, Sere fell to the ground, smelling of alcohol.

Among the piles of garbage, Boluogo stepped forward cautiously. Halfway there, he felt that he should bring some gifts, but after looking around the Undead Club, there was nothing precious here.

Damn it, Bologo felt like his brain was stinking from alcohol.

After walking out of the Undead Club, the road ahead was much more familiar. Bologg walked quickly. He thought what should he say when he saw Amu?

haven't seen you for a long time? The two of them had just separated a few hours ago, so it's not right to express their good feelings directly, right?

The more he thought about Boluogo, the more irritated he became. He began to hate why human beings were so complicated and couldn't even understand a single sentence. However, he also sighed at the beauty of human beings. People like him would one day be so called warm. pack.

Boluogo's pace gradually slowed down. He was thinking about what he should say and organizing the words in his mind. It would be too difficult for a guy like him who is not good at words to do such a thing.

Experts want to overcome difficulties.

Burlogo suddenly stopped. He felt that he needed a speech. Suddenly he took a few steps forward. He trusted his memory.

A few minutes later, Boluogo arrived at the Kenshu. He could almost walk this road with his eyes closed. He came to the Courtyard of Pillars, took the elevator, and then went to the sublimation furnace core.

The sublimation furnace core is a place that has no distinction between day and night. You can see many researchers staying up late and working overtime. Boluogo ignored them and turned left and right in the corridor before arriving at the residential area. According to the house number in his memory, Boluogo stood in front of a row of familiar house numbers.

Boluogo took a deep breath and tried to muster up the courage. Just as he raised his hand to knock on the door, he stopped again, and his arms began to shake as if uncontrollably.

Damn it, I've obviously climbed out of the predicament, but why do I feel like I've fallen into another predicament again?

Seeing that his body was not working at all, Boluogo simply controlled the snake scale liquid, and saw a silver hand rising slowly. Just as it was about to knock on the door, Boluogo's expression almost twisted.

At the same time, the hanging silver hand twisted into a ball of wool.

"Move!"

Boluogo roared inwardly, sulking with himself.

He became panicked, feeling honored and panicked about what he was going to get next.

After struggling for an unknown amount of time, there was an intermittent knock on the door in the quiet corridor.

After finally knocking on the door, Boluogo breathed a sigh of relief, but what followed was even greater tension. What should he say when Aimu opens the door?

By the way, the speech.

Boluogo tried to recall the words he had prepared on the road, but when he thought about it now, it was completely blank.

At this critical moment, the door opened.

Aimu's eyes were narrowed, and he was wearing a set of brown plush pajamas. His figure was swaying, as if he had overslept.

"Oh, Boluogo?" Aimu said in a daze.

Boluogo fell silent. He felt that there were thousands of words stuck in his throat. After struggling hard, only one sentence escaped from the thousands of words.

"After careful analysis and sorting, I am convinced that I have a certain fondness for Aimu."

What Boluogo said was like an experimental report. If he hadn't crushed the papyrus, he could even have submitted an experimental paper to Aimu.

It's a pity that Boluogo has no talent in alchemy. Otherwise, with his rigorous attitude, he would be a rising star in the academic world.

After saying that, Boluogo felt his whole body relaxed.

He understood Irwin's stubbornness. She was like Cinderella and Cinderella in the story...

muse.

"oh."

Aimu nodded, then closed the door, staggered back to the bed, picked up the pillow, and nestled in a comfortable position.

"You're crazy. Is this what you're doing in the middle of the night?"

Aimu's voice became lower and lower, and gradually disappeared, as if he had completely fallen asleep.

A few seconds later, she opened her eyes suddenly, and the blue halo became much brighter, like a searchlight, sweeping away most of the darkness.

Aimu murmured, "Something's wrong..."

Borrogo heard an uncontrollable scream from behind the door.