After the Cannon Fodder’s Rebirth
Chapter 106: Extra-morbid
Jiang Zesheng later learned that He Ziming was his very speculative netizen, and for this he felt sincere regret for his indifference and indifference.
He typed He Ziming on the Internet: "I'm sorry." These three words.
This was the first time in his life that he felt remorse for his indifference and numbness. He Ziming was the first person to let him feel other emotions besides fear and indifference after the abduction.
But everything is too late.
He wanted to make up, he wanted to save, he wanted to say sorry to He Ziming in person, but he was afraid and timid. He did n’t know how to face He Ziming, nor did He know that He Ziming knew the truth Would he forgive him for choosing to stand by and ask for help ...
Even more scared, after He Ziming knew that he was Jiang Zesheng, he didn't even want to be a netizen with him online.
Therefore, in the end, he did not choose to be honest with He Ziming, and walked from the back of the Internet to reality.
Under such circumstances, the only thing Jiang Zesheng can do is to help He Ziming resist those rich second-generation school tyrants, continue to help improve his plan, help him secretly connect people, buy media reporters, and further expand the influence of the incident Also let those school tyrants never move him.
Let the He family and all those who don't take He Ziming a **** to stop bullying him at will.
He Ziming is an extremely outstanding, excellent, and determined person. Even if he has suffered such humiliation, suffering, and life, he has not been defeated. Bao Jianfeng has emerged from the sharpening. Those tortures and sharpenings have made him more radiant and dazzling. Get up, let Jiang Zesheng see an extremely magnificent, gorgeous color.
It was a kind of tenacious, amazing vitality and perseverance that he lacked, and did not consciously make Jiang Zesheng long for it.
But it was too late, everything made Jiang Zesheng discover too late. After experiencing his bereavement and the betrayal of his friends, he watched He Ziming getting better and better, more paranoid, and morbid ...
He Ziming hated him. After He Ziming was rescued and returned to normal life, He Ziming looked at him and Jiang Zesheng read it.
He Ziming doesn't hate anyone who bullied him, but he hates his own death ... Jiang Zesheng knows this clearly, but he doesn't do anything, he only bears He Ziming silently again and again Bear the provocations and find faults of He Ziming ...
Even the people who played in his circle couldn't stand it anymore. When he tried to teach He Ziming to him, he was stopped.
He owed it to He Ziming, and Jiang Zesheng knew well.
He Ziming was the first person to make him feel fear and numbness. He Ziming taught his feeling to be guilty. Jiang Zesheng has been struggling with He guilt. He wandered for a long time and couldn't get rid of it. He has been condemned by his own conscience. .
He helped He Ziming collect many times and solved many things behind He Ziming, but he never told He Ziming that He Ziming knew.
He owed He Ziming, so what he did for He Ziming should be taken for granted and should not be extravagant. He thought so under his heart.
He Ziming has always hated him, hating him more and more, and becoming more and more distorted ... He can perceive He Ziming's mental illness now, and he is equally sick ...
Jiang Zesheng does not know when they will end their malformed entanglement.
But what caused their relationship to change qualitatively was the military exercise. As an 'undercover', He Ziming had no choice but to pretend to reconcile with him and forgive him for his 'confidential documents'. Deception was only a so-called 'confidential document' of an exercise. He Ziming was just playing him to complete the task ... But sadly, Jiang Zesheng believed it and held such a good vision and was deceived ...
It was at that time that Jiang Zesheng knew that he had a feeling of transcending friendship and guilt to He Ziming.
There has been guilt and excessive concern for He Ziming for too long, and even Jiang Zesheng himself did not know when his feelings for He Ziming began, but when he found out, he had fallen in love with He Ziming sadly, unable to extricate himself, Can't break free.
What's even more sad is that he loves He Ziming, but He Ziming hates him: "I have been lying to you, Master Jiang, you are so deceiving!"
"Friend? How could I be friends with Master and Master? Forgive, don't even think about it, I hate you."
"Looking at your stupid and fooled face, I'm very happy."
"..."
In the face of He Ziming's provocation and meanness, Jiang Zesheng changed his face for the first time in history, but He Ziming was very happy for his painful appearance and showed a very open smile.
Jiang Zesheng looked at He Ziming's smile, and suddenly he understood. Now the only thing that can make He Ziming happy is his pain.
Since then, they have begun to mingle with unexplainable pathologies, love and hate are intertwined with morbid, twisted entanglements ...
Most of the time, He Ziming took the initiative to hurt him and sting him for joy.
He Ziming seemed to have devoted all his energy and attention to him. He had no intention and was too lazy to entangle with others, as if he only saw his pain, he was satisfied.
We are happy and do not change our original intention.
When Jiang Zesheng was hurt by him, he was often painful and happy ... Although he felt painful for this, it was more like a kind of atonement for him, as if he was suffering from Stockholm syndrome, in some cases When he is alone, he still feels a bit grateful, even if He Ziming treats him and provokes him, what if he is better than a lifetime goal?
Even if they can't be together, as long as He Ziming is not with others.
Jiang Zesheng also did not think of walking with He Ziming from behind the Internet into reality. He once proposed to He Ziming to meet in reality, but He Ziming did not know whether he knew his identity, or for some other reason, and chose to decline to face him ... If so, they can only be the closest friends on the Internet, but in reality they can only be enemies.
He and He Ziming concluded a marriage because Jiang Zesheng knew that He Ziming was too high-profile and eye-catching in the Fair Party. It has become a thorn in the eyes of many people. There are already senior members of the Fair Party who want to get rid of him. The orphan has become the secretary-general, and the party leader has acquiesced, but He Ziming knows nothing about it ... Jiang Zesheng learned of this matter for the first time. He was suffering from the fairness of the party and the water was too deep. At that time, the Fair Party proposed a marriage to the Reform Party in order to stabilize the alliance ...
The leader of the Reform Party only intended to find two insignificant people to marry, but Jiang Zesheng took the initiative to find him and asked to marry He Ziming.
This was the only way he could think of at the time to help He Ziming.
Married to him, even if he is half of the reform party, the Jiang family will rely on him. Even if their relationship is not good, He Ziming will nominally be his spouse. With such a layer of relationship, as long as Jiang If the family does not fall, no one at the Fair Party can easily move him. If he intends to deal with him, he must be prepared for the Guilty Reform Party and the Jiang family.
Jiang Zesheng originally thought that He Ziming would not easily promise to marry him, but He Ziming did not do anything extreme as he expected, but promised blandly, only stabbing him with a few words when he received the certificate.
After getting married, their relationship became worse, colder and more alienated ...
Jiang Zesheng had thought that he and He Ziming would carry each other through their entangled lives ...
But he did not expect that He Ziming would have an accident.
When he rushed to the hospital to hear the doctor announce that He Ziming was brain dead, his whole body collapsed. He thought that he and He Ziming had the rest of their lives to be entangled, but did not expect such a thing to happen.
Everyone persuaded him to give up. He Ziming was brain dead, so he pulled the oxygen mask of He Ziming directly, let him go, let himself go, and start a new life, but Jiang Zesheng refused ... I don't want to believe that He Ziming just let him go so easily and no longer tangled with him ...
One year, two years, three years ...
He couldn't wake up He Ziming by all means. He Ziming was really dead. Lying motionless there, he would never stare at him or stab him without talking.
But Jiang Zesheng began to feel scared--
If He Ziming died, he would no longer find it interesting to live.
He tried to commit suicide several times but was rescued.
Considering that He Ziming was still breathing, he did not want to give up hope. If He Ziming did not die and woke up, but he died, wouldn't He Ziming be with others and forget him later?
Jiang Zesheng didn't want to do this, so no matter how painful he was, he could only insist ... He couldn't commit suicide, so he began to abuse hallucinogens ...
Only when using hallucinogens could he break free from the fear that He Ziming seemed to disappear from his life.
Because, only when using hallucinogens and producing hallucinations, he can see He Ziming again, alive He Ziming ...
The hallucinogens severely damaged his body, and everyone around him felt that he couldn't do it like this.
I thought that my friend recommended a method for treating vegetative people to use it for He Ziming. That way is to let the consciousness of vegetative relatives enter the deep level of the vegetative brain. Waking up He Ziming doesn't give any hope. He just wants to save himself, but after hearing that this method might wake up He Ziming, he started to try without hesitation ...
Four years, five years, six years ...
When Jiang Zesheng's consciousness first entered He Ziming's mind, he could not find any traces and the fluctuations in He Ziming's existence, but gradually he began to dream one after another. Many dreams that were strange and ridiculous in his dreams He can really feel the presence of He Ziming. In one of the dreams, he is the younger brother of He Ziming, He Ziming is the royal prince. They love and hate. Eventually, He Ziming died. He was distressed, and in another dream, he was reconciled. He Ziming replaced his destiny child. He Ziming eventually died for him. He was so anxious that he even had two dreams. One was He Ziming's master, the other was his brother, and the other was Orc, He Ziming is a stupid little Asian beast who loves him ...
Many dreams related to He Ziming are connected in series, always making him feel infinite hope.
Every time Jiang Zesheng woke up, he told his friends cheerfully that he felt He Ziming's consciousness, and He Ziming was still alive.
But my friend listened to him and looked at the device showing that He Ziming was in a brain death and had no fluctuating brain conditions, but sadly told him: "He was dreaming, he had been affected by hallucinogens and did not dissipate. Dream. He Ziming is already dead. "
Jiang Zesheng was reluctant to believe. He was obsessed with this hypnosis that entered He Ziming's brain. He was convinced that he would one day wake up He Ziming.
Once, twice, three times, ten times, fifty times ...
Hundreds of times, hundreds of different dreams have been made, and He Ziming has not yet woken up.
Disengaging one's consciousness several times in a row and awakening another person's consciousness will cause great harm to one's body.
In particular, Jiang Zesheng has done so many times in succession, many people have persuaded Jiang Zesheng to give up ...
However, Jiang Zesheng persisted and refused to give up. He believed that He Ziming was still alive and would wake up one day ...
This is not the time to be discouraged occasionally, but at that time, Jiang Zesheng always thought that even if He Ziming would never wake up, then let him enter the hypnosis of He Ziming's brain again and again in such a strange way. He Ziming died in the dream.
That kind of death is far better for him than for him to live alone in a world without He Ziming.
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