The star who is too difficult to get out of the village

Chapter 178
After hearing what Yang Guanglei said, Yang Jie felt that there was still a gap between his own skills and his own.

Forget it, I'd better hit this kid again.Who makes this guy always love to compare himself to himself?

Seeing that everyone was looking at him, Yang Jie was not stage-frightened, and started to perform while sitting down. He didn't say a word for a while, and recited it fluently.

"Haha, are you dumbfounded now?" Yu Geng said with a smile: "We don't need to talk about it, you can tell the good and the bad by yourself."

In fact, he was also a little shocked. It's just that it's not difficult to recite this thing, but it's difficult to do everything right.

Over there, Yang Guanglei was completely convinced. He pretended to stagger, covered his face with his hands and said, "Uncle, you...you have practiced it specially! Are you tricking me again?"

Even Qi Lan who was sitting next to Yang Jie secretly asked, "Have you really learned it?"

"I haven't learned it before. I just heard it. After listening to it a few times, it will be fine. It's not a difficult thing!" Yang Jie raised his eyebrows and said.

But he said this in a normal voice, and after he finished speaking, he found that everyone's eyes were on him.

It is estimated that everyone is thinking in their hearts: What kind of pervert is this.

Can this thing be learned by listening?
Then what have they learned all these years!

It's really unreasonable!

"What? Isn't it?" Yang Jie asked pretending not to understand.

I just thought it would be fun to tease these guys a bit.

How could he not know the difficulty of this? If he was asked to practice by himself, he didn't know how long it would take to practice to reach an advanced level.This is to install it through the system.

Even Yu Geng couldn't stand his tone anymore, "What kind of breed are you? It took me more than three months of practice before I mastered it. You said you mastered it after just listening to it a few times?"

"Yeah, it's not difficult. I can do other things too. Let me talk about a geographical map?" Yang Jie continued to show off.

"Forget it, play by yourself! We don't want to hear it anymore." Yu Geng waved his hand.Who wants to be hit again.

After a while, these people from Yiguangshe have completely convinced Yang Jie. As a layman, he even learned four subjects of cross talk, funny and singing, including tongue twisters, Guankou, Shulaibao, provincial dialects, folk songs, popular songs, and Taiping lyrics. proficient.

A total of fourteen of them were here, but none of them won. Even Yue Guangsheng, who was already famous, was completely defeated in the pop songs he was good at.Yang Jie's pop singing is master-level, and it's no shame for him to be defeated by such a wild way that he can even find the rhythm.

But his performance made everyone's jaw drop in shock, including Qi Lan who also looked at Yang Jie with admiration.

After some competitions, Meng Caihui said listlessly: "Master, we must practice the basic skills well in the future. Fortunately, we were taught by the uncle today, otherwise we will be humiliated by a layman when we go out in the future, and we will have no face to see you again."

"It's good to know!" Although Guo Yishan said so, he was also amazed at Yang Jie's level. Judging from the level he showed this time, it was not much different from him and Yu Geng.

And Wang Fen, who was sitting next to her, felt like she had found a treasure. She was now convinced that the [-]% of the shares would never be in vain.

Since they have not passed Yang Jie's test, they can only recruit people.It was finally confirmed that the six people who will appear in the group crosstalk in "Five Internal Organs Vacation" in the evening are Yang Jie as the whole person, Guo Yishan as the kidney, Yu Geng as the heart, Sun Ming as the liver, Luan Guangyun as the lung, and Meng Caihui as the spleen.

The following is the rehearsal.

Yang Jie is the easiest one. He has the complete version here and remembers it, so it's not difficult.The main thing is to correct the performances of Luan Guangyun and Meng Caihui.In fact, there is no difficulty, let alone poor words.

"Xiao Luan, come and record the seventh episode of "Extreme Challenge"!" Yang Jie said to Luan Guangyun.

Since you have accepted the task, you have to take it seriously, and you can't just take it seriously because there is no punishment.After all, he was greedy for the reward.

If it is completed earlier, you can come and go as you like here in the capital.

It's so tempting.

Luan Guangyun, who was familiarizing himself with his words and intonation, was stunned for a moment when he heard Yang Jie's words, and then he was overjoyed.

The popularity of "Extremely Challenged" is too high. Although it can become popular without mentioning the last show, it can be familiar to the national audience no matter what.Few people would refuse this opportunity now.Don't talk about him, a person with little exposure.

"Uncle, can someone like me, who is not well-known, be able to appear in "Extreme Challenge"?"

After Yang Jie showed a high level of cross talk skills today, this call by Master Uncle Luan Guangyun was not at all reluctant.

"Why not, I can do it if I say yes!" Yang Jie said domineeringly, even an amateur can make interesting things in this show, not to mention that Luan Guangyun doesn't know anyone at all.

Then Yang Jie joked again: "It doesn't matter if you don't want to, I'll find someone else."

"Don't, go, definitely go." Luan Guangyun was eager to go, and then asked cautiously: "Master, there won't be any perverted punishment this time, right?"

"No, there is no punishment in my vision." Yang Jie said with a smile.

"That's good, I don't think I can bear those challenges!"

Seeing that Luan Guangyun was about to go to "Extreme Challenge", Meng Caihui next to him was envious. After hesitating for a while, he tentatively said: "Master, do you think I can go? I'm not afraid of punishment."

"You, you can't do it now, let's talk about the small theater first!"

"Oh!" Meng Caihui shook his head and lost energy.

Seeing him like this, Yang Jie revealed a little bit, after the recording of "Extreme Challenge", I will shoot a [-]-episode sitcom, and I will let you all come to guest star at that time.

"Really?" Meng Caihui regained his energy.

"Nonsense, I can still lie to you." Yang Jie smiled and said, "Do you think it's a good thing to call me uncle now?"

"I didn't feel bad at first, you are my real uncle." Meng Caihui was suddenly possessed by a playful spirit.I almost hugged my thigh.

"Okay, let's practice hard, cross talk is still very interesting now, don't fail to catch the opportunity when the time comes, then you can't blame others."

Meng Caihui nodded, he is not stupid, he knows that he can only cross the border if he has done his job well.Otherwise there is no play!
Over there, Luan Guangyun went to find his master and wife with good news.

Guo Yishan called him and said: "If you are told to go, you can go there with peace of mind. You have been in our agency for 13 years, and now you are also responsible for managing the agency. I know you have a sense of proportion, but you have to guard where you go. According to the rules, you can't mess around. You must know that if you want to get something, you must pay.

Let me tell you, now Yang Jie also owns [-]% of our company's shares, and he will be his own in the future. There will be many such opportunities in the future.You have practiced your basic skills now, and you will seize the opportunity when the time comes.And I'm going to accept the students of the long-character subject, and you brothers will also take on the responsibility of teaching at that time. "

"Uncle Master has shares in our Yiguang Club?" Luan Guangyun asked in surprise.

"That's right, I'll talk about it in a few days, and you've seen his basic skills just now, he's much better than you, you can't lose by calling him uncle, and you have to respect him from the heart, not just lip service Deal with it. Did you hear that?" Guo Yishan taught.

"Understood, don't worry, master."

Yu Geng interjected and said, "Xiao Luan, just look at how much Yang Jie has worked out in this year. There are so many opportunities for him. Don't even think about the protagonist. If his acting skills are not good enough, he won't Yes, but the ratings of the dramas he participated in are obvious to all, even small supporting roles will also receive attention. This time I will go to "Extreme Challenge" and perform well. Don't be afraid of hardship. I haven't watched Huang Sen, Huang Xin, Sun Zhengguang, these big names are not there Complaints? Why? It’s because Yang Jie exchanged all their sacrifices for ratings and fame.”

"Understood, sir!"

Luan Guangyun continued to practice Ci with anticipation.

Here, Guo Yishan sighed: "Xiaojie's action is fast enough. Just after signing the contract, he arranged one for Xiaoluan. If he performs well this time, Xiaoluan will also be able to get out of the circle and gain a little fame. Let's It will be much better if there is another pillar like Xiaoyue in the club."

"Then I'm afraid the position of chief steward you arranged for him will be difficult to get." Yu Geng said.

The position of the butler is very important, so naturally he can't stay out of the house all day.

"It's okay, let's talk about it when he can't arrange it!" Guo Yishan didn't care much about this matter.Isn't there still a wife in charge of the stall? Nothing will happen, and Luan Guangyun has developed better, and he has more confidence and persuasiveness to manage the following.

In the evening, in the Yiguangshe Theater.Full house.

First, after a few cross talk sessions were over, Yue Guangsheng, who was in charge of announcing the show, came to the stage and said with a smile: "Now the scene is also hot, and everyone laughed for a while. Today's main course is about to be served."

"Hurry up! Since Mr. Guo and Mr. Yu are going to go, why bother?" shouted the audience below.

"Don't worry, the next one is a crosstalk between six people." Yue Guangsheng laughed.

"Wow." The audience all exclaimed when they heard so many people talk about a cross talk.

You must know that group crosstalk is generally three-person, and there are very few people with more than three people. Without a good book, it is more chaotic.

Didn't expect to hear another one here.

This is not over yet, Yue Guangsheng continued: "This comic book is written by my uncle, yes, it is Yang Jie who is younger than me and older than me. He will also play today, come on, I won't talk about it, Besides, neither you nor me who is waiting to take the stage can't be offended."

"Haha, let's not go down."

"Don't be poor!"

Yue Guangsheng went down, and Guo Yishan and others also came up from the backstage.No self-introduction either.know each other.

As soon as Sun Ming took the stage, he first greeted the opposite party: "Yang Jie, Yang Jie, come quickly!"

Yang Jie came to the stage from the side: "Are you looking for me?"

Sun Ming took it for granted, "I'm looking for you."

Yang Jie asked strangely: "What are you doing, Sun Ming?"

"Sun Ming? I'm not Sun Ming!"

"Didn't you talk about Sun Ming in cross talk?"

Sun Ming drawled, "No."

"Then who are you?"

Sun Ming counted with his fingers: "Look, people have five internal organs, heart, liver, spleen, lung and kidney." He pointed to himself and said, "I am your liver."

Yang Jie pointed at him with a speechless face, and said to the audience: "Then I have severe fatty liver. You have seen it."

The audience burst into laughter.

Sun Ming ignored it and continued, "I'm not the only one here."

Yang Jie looked around and asked suspiciously, "Who else is there?"

Sun Ming stretched out his hand and pulled it backwards: "Look, your heart, liver, spleen, lungs and kidneys, all your five internal organs are here."

Yang Jie: Oh, all my internal organs have come down?
Sun Ming: Yes.

Yang Jie: Then why are you looking for me?

Sun Ming: We are looking for you.

Yang Jie: Gifts?

Five people clasped their fists together: Please leave!

"Hahaha..." The audience laughed happily.

Shocked, Yang Jie gestured speechlessly with his hand and said: Please leave, you are not asking for leave, this is murder.I can't live if one of them leaves.

Yu Geng said at this moment: Yang Jie.

Yang Jie faced him: ah?
Yu Geng sang: I am your heart.

Yang Jie stretched out his hand to hold his arm: OK, OK, stop singing, why is my heart so much older than my age.

Yu Geng continued: Yang Jie, I have to tell you a few words from my heart.

Yang Jie said with a smile: Yes, the heart must not speak the truth.

Yu Geng warned: I am now overloaded, and now I am heart failure, my heart.
As he spoke, Yu Geng's raised right hand stopped in mid-air, trembling and not speaking.

Yang Jie didn't understand why, so he asked the people next to him, "What does he mean by this?"
Sun Ming pawed him and explained: Intermittent.

Yang Jie was startled: Intermittent?This stops?
Sun Ming said indifferently: Don't worry, he can come up slowly.

Yang Jie looked at Yu Geng, a little uncertain: Really?
Yu Geng came over slowly, and said in a trembling voice: I am suffering from heart failure.

Yang Jie breathed a sigh of relief: Great, it's really slowing down.

Yu Geng continued to scold him: You said how good my heart used to be.

Yang Jie: What's wrong.

Yu Geng clapped his left hand up and down with his right hand: At that time, he could jump and dance, run and make trouble at the same time. At that time, he danced square dance with those old ladies in the park, and there was nothing wrong with him.

Said and jumped up.The others jumped up too.There was another burst of laughter below.

Yang Jie hurriedly stopped the others: Stop, don't jump, what are you making fun of here.

He said to Yu Geng: "Tell me about you."

Yu Geng scolded him and said: You said that in the past few years you have watched you, you have been filming variety shows, TV dramas, movies, singing, and sometimes talking about cross talk. You are so busy now, my heart.

Then he raised his hand and stopped there.

Yang Jie has experience this time, so there is no need for others to explain: there is a break again!Can he slow down?

Sun Ming pulled him over and said: Can come up slowly, can come up slowly.

After saying a word, he took over and said: Me, it's time for me to speak out.

Yang Jie immediately took a step back when he heard this: "Then let's quarantine as soon as possible."

Sun Ming asked: Why are you quarantined?

Yang Jie said as a matter of course: You are going to get hepatitis, why don't we quarantine?

Sun Ming: Am I not a liver?Isn't what I say is just words from the liver.

Yang Jie: Oh, such an idiot.

Sun Ming: Yes.

Yang Jie stepped forward and asked: What's wrong with you?
Sun Ming sobbed immediately after hearing this: What's wrong with me?
As he spoke, he pushed away Guo Yishan who came forward to comfort him: Don't worry about it.Let's all come and see what Yang Jie has become.

Yang Jie didn't know what to do, pointed at him and said: You are not guilty, among these few people, you are the healthiest and fattest.

Sun Ming didn't wipe away his tears after hearing this, and said loudly: Am I fat?I am bloated.

Yang Jie was shocked and said: Are you edema?
Sun Mingdao: Yes, it's all because of your drinking!
Yang Jie: Don't blame me for drinking.

"what happened?"

Yang Jie faced down and said: Now there is no game without wine, so you can't have a drink at any meal.

Sun Ming glanced at him: Yes, you drink six bottles of beer in the morning.

Yang Jie raised his hand and said: That's a habit, drink some to refresh yourself first.

Sun Ming: Are you used to it?who.
As he said that he was about to fall, Yang Jie quickly supported his huge body that was about to fall: this is hepatic coma, come up eight people quickly.

When Sun Ming saw that people were about to gather around and fight, he got up again: I'm not in the way, I'm not in the way.I can still hold on.Just say that you drink six bottles in the morning, drink it at noon, drink it at night, drink it when you sleep, and drink it when you wake up.

He pointed at Yang Jie and said, "That day when you were going to the market, you just worked hard and drank half a catty of white wine in the car."

Yang Jie: My addiction is too big.

Sun Ming: Now how much damage your alcohol has done to my liver.The doctor has made it clear.
Talking about falling again.Luan Guangyun rushed forward and pinched him.

Sun Ming quickly fended him off: You're making me cringe.

At this time, Yang Jie looked at Meng Caihui next to him again: Big eyes!who are you?

Meng Caihui took a step forward with his hands behind his back: You don't know me?
Yang Jie turned around and asked others: Why is this guy so arrogant?

Meng Yanghui opened his mouth and said in dialect: I am your spleen.

Saying this in dialect is "fart", which made the audience laugh again.

Yang Jie thought he heard it wrong: what are you?
"spleen!"

Yang Jie: I will open the window and let you out.

At this time, Sun Ming came up and said: No, no, the spleen is the heart, liver, and spleen.

Yang Jie understood now: that's called spleen, three tones.

Meng Caihui still said in dialect: Yes, it is the spleen.Still four tones.

Yang Jie was speechless, and said to the audience: He can't change it.My spleen, transplanted from a designated place, does not speak the same way as me.

The audience burst into laughter.

Meng Caihui said with a characteristic dialect: Do you know why I am like this?

Yang Jie: I don't know.

Meng Caihui turned his head: I'm just full.

Yang Jie: I can tell, you are full, aren't you?

When Meng Caihui heard that Yang Jie was still mocking him, he immediately said excitedly: It's because of your irregular diet.There is no next meal after the last meal, it is a hungry meal and a full meal.

Yang Jie: All actors are like this, when they get busy with work, they forget to eat.When you catch up with the time you can eat, don't take a few more bites.

Meng Caihui wanted to make people laugh as soon as he spoke this dialect: Then you eat too much.

Yang Jie asked: What have I eaten?

Meng Caihui: When I open my eyes in the morning
Yang Jie interrupted: Stop.Don't I have to drink those six bottles of beer first thing in the morning?
Sun Ming interjected: Yes, can I bear it?

Meng Caihui interrupted: Come on, with your six bottles of beer, he will have a bowl of egg soup first, then a bowl of pimple soup, then a bowl of hot and sour soup, and then a bowl of hot and spicy soup.

With the chuckle of the audience, Yang Jie stretched out four fingers: Just six bottles of beer, let me have four bowls of soup first, okay.

Meng Caihui: That's it, he didn't feel full.

Yang Jie: Nonsense, all of them are rare.

Meng Caihui: Those who have to do it will come later.What Xiaolongbao, pan-fried buns, fried boxes.Fried Yuanxiao, fried coke rings, fried pancakes, fried meatballs, fried ghosts.What kind of sliced ​​noodles, chaotic noodles, stretched noodles, pulled noodles, chicken noodles, stewed noodles, dried noodles, fried noodles.He is the same.

Yang Jie: Oh, I only eat these for breakfast.

Meng Caihui: Just these things, from 06:30 in the morning to eleven o'clock.

Yang Jie: It's time for a break.

Meng Caihui: Let's eat lunch again.

Yang Jie: Huh?I have nothing else to do.

Meng Caihui: Tell me, can I bear this time?

Yang Jie: All right, all right, let's take a break.

At this moment, Luan Guangyun took a step forward and panted heavily.

Needless to say, Yang Jie already knew which part it was: This means you are my lung.

Luan Guangyun gasped for breath again, and coughed to gather enough air to speak: Let me say a few words.

Yang Jie raised his hand and said: Let's save some time, and stop talking nonsense.

Luan Guangyun asked urgently: Am I not your lung?I have to say a few words.

He exhaled twice again at Yang Jie.Yang Jie quickly motioned him to breathe out.

Luan Guangyun: You, you smoke too frequently.Once you draw it, there is no end to it.You say I can't stand it.

As he spoke, his lips curled up.

Yang Jie took a look: What are you doing?What about calling a dog?
Luan Guangyun: I didn't call you.

"Nonsense, do you call me silly?"

"It's called smoke, smoke!"

Yang Jie laughed and said: Are you addicted?Please exercise restraint in stage performances.Let me tell you, smoking is not our fault, it is normal to smoke two packs of cigarettes when engaging in artistic creation.

Luan Guangyun exposed it and said: The one you smoked was two packs of cigarettes, and there was no end to it.When you wake up in the morning and open your eyes,
When Yang Jie heard this, he immediately pawed him: Why did you mention this?I'm still busy when I wake up in the morning.Must I drink those six beers first?

Luan Guangyun probed and said: What about after the six bottles of beer are finished?

Yang Jie: That pile of food has to be eaten until eleven o'clock.

Luan Guangyun: I smoked the cigarette after eating.When I wake up in the morning, I suck on it as soon as I open my eyes. I smoke in the morning and at noon.Finish smoking at noon, smoke in the evening, smoke in the evening after smoking in the evening.When you are engaged in creation, you will smoke even if you are unable to create, and you will smoke on sunny days and cloudy days.

As he spoke, he began to suck again.

Guo Yishan came forward at this time; it's all right, go to the side and suck.

Squeeze Luan Guangyun to the back.When he came up, he pinched his waist and sighed.

Yang Jie looked at him: Yo, why is this one like this?You can speak out?
Guo Yishan jumped out two words in a very empty way: this, question, need, be careful.

After finishing speaking, he looked out of breath again, and sighed.

"Be careful? Then who are you?"

Guo Yishan paused and said, still out of breath: I, yes, your kidney.

Yang Jie felt unnatural: My kidney?This is kidney deficiency.

Guo Yishan: Day by day, don't let me, I am idle.

Yang Jie: What's wrong with you?

Guo Yishan: Since, in the morning, when I wake up, just, don’t let me be idle.

Yang Jie stared: Why did you mention this?When I woke up in the morning, I had to drink the six bottles of beer first, and then I ate the pile of things until eleven o'clock, and I continued to smoke after eating.

Guo Yishan: What next?
Yang Jie: With enough energy, I'm going out to work.

Guo Yishan: How long have you been working here?
Yang Jie: That's not necessarily the case. There's no time until it's finished.

Guo Yishan: Are you done with work?

Yang Jie: It's time for me to take a break.

Guo Yishan: A break from the meeting?As he spoke, he clutched his stomach and said uncomfortablely: I'm so overwhelmed.

"Hahahahaha." The audience all laughed.

There were also five people on the stage who wanted to talk to Yang Jie, and there was a bit of trouble.

Relying on his bulk, Sun Ming stopped everyone: Don't mess around, you have to ask for leave one by one, I have to come first.

Yang Jie: what?
Yu Geng quit over there and stepped forward: why did you ask for leave first.In terms of age, I have to ask first.

Sun Ming: In terms of age, we are all older.You have the worst heart. The quick-acting heart-relief pills and boosters he usually carries in his pocket are all for you.

As he spoke, he said to the others: There are a few of you, if any of you is sick, he takes some pills and drinks some bitter water, and I have to stare at him for detoxification.

Yang Jie: Yes, liver detoxification.

Luan Guangyun took a step forward: No, no, no, I still have to ask for leave.Because he smokes too often, he smokes one box after another, choking me so much that I can't breathe.

Sun Ming stopped him: I will slap you first!He has to drink eight bottles of beer for one cigarette, so I can complain to someone.

Yang Jie: Is that the case?

Meng Caihui interjected: Your guy can quit smoking and drinking, but can he quit eating?

Sun Ming put his hands behind his back and said angrily: That's right, all the delicious food is for you, and all the orange soda cream popsicles are left for you.

Yu Geng twisted his shoulders and said, "That's right, it's all in his place, it's so crowded that I have no room."

Guo Yishan's low-spirited voice also rang out: "Look at your sick and crooked appearances one by one!"
Sun Ming pointed at him and said, "He still licked his face and said that we still have to pay back."As long as you are two brothers, we are all one.When the co-author is on duty, we are full-time, and when we come to you, we are on vacation.

Yang Jie laughed beside him and said: Haha, I started fighting myself.

There was another commotion on the stage.

Yang Jie said loudly: "Okay, okay, I can hear it."The opinions raised by you are correct.

He pointed at Yu Geng and said, "How long is your vacation?"
Yu Geng raised a finger and said: I invite you for a month.

Yang Jie: One month?If you walk for a day, I will get down.

At the beginning, everyone has to ask for leave, this month, that two months, this half year, that year, the most annoying thing is that the kidney is required to be removed.

Yang Jie waved his hand: Stop talking!You are right, I have arranged my work too tightly.Neglecting your health.Didn't you come up with this idea today?I'll start today, pay attention to health preservation, can't I change it?

Just then Yang Jie's phone rang.

"Hey! Director, what are you talking about? Shoot another night scene tonight until dawn?"

Hearing this, Yu Geng became anxious.

Yang Jie waved his hand to signal him to be calm, and then said to the mobile phone: My heart can't stay up all night, can we wait two days before shooting?What, let's have a drink if we don't shoot today?
Sun Ming became anxious after hearing this.

Yang Jie comforted him, and then said to the phone: Starting today, I will stop drinking for a month.What to eat?I'm not going there, I'm eating at home today.That smoke, give it to whomever you like.

At this time, Guo Yishan said with a choked voice: Remove.

Frightened, Yang Jie said: I'll go to the toilet first.Then quickly hung up the phone.

"Are you going to do it this time?"

"Hey, fine. If you want to do this, we won't ask for leave."

Yang Jie said quickly in one breath: "Hey, if you don't ask for leave, I will also pay attention to rest, not because of the impact of work. I won't go to dinner, I won't get tired of drinking, and I won't smoke too much. One by one, starting from today, I stopped eating, drinking, smoking, and panting. I sat on the toilet every day, so there is not much more to do, another month I can"

The five said together: Healed!

Yang Jie: I'm dying!

(End of this chapter)