I'm crazy

Chapter 519 Diary
September 9, sunny

In a blink of an eye, I have known her for five years.

I'm also in my thirties.

Even if I don't look old and take good care of it, the years still leave traces on my face.

She hasn't changed at all.

It is still the innocence and unparalleledness when we first met, and the arrogance and willfulness when we first met.

When I see her, I sometimes think that no matter how time goes by, she will always be so unrestrained like a breeze.

In the past five years, my stubborn father has never given up introducing me to someone he thinks is suitable.

But what was impossible five years ago has no chance since then.

I have always been a person who knows exactly what I want, I know what I am doing, and I know what I should do.

Later, he gave up his plan to let me get married and have children.

the reason is simple.

She came to my house one day and happened to meet my father who was coming home.

After she left, my father only asked me one sentence: Is that the person you like?
Wrinkles gradually appeared on his face, frowning all the year round made him look fierce, and he was expressionless when he said this.

I didn't speak, just nodded slightly.

He didn't say anything else, just turned around and left.

Since then, he has never tried to introduce me to anyone, nor has he pushed me to get married.

Life seems to go by really fast.

It's almost too late to do anything, and it's almost too old when I haven't reacted.

One day, looking at myself in the mirror, the face that was gradually scarred by the years has lost the arrogance and arrogance of youth and the youthful spirit that is not afraid of heaven and earth.

Only then did I suddenly realize that I was already old, already so old...

Time treats everyone fairly.

In fact, I don't have many wrinkles on my face.

After all, I have dragged my mother's blessing, and I think I look pretty good-looking.

But even if there are no traces on my face, those eyes that are no longer clear and vivid also show the passage of time on me.

So every time I see her, I sigh.

She will always be that her.

No matter how long the years are, it can't erase the arrogance and free and easy madness in her body.

I've grown disinclined to deal with company matters lately.

Whenever I deal with those old foxes in the mall, it makes me feel as if I have become as old and smooth as them.

It's really not a good experience.

I am a person who wants to be young forever.

After all, I spent Children's Day with her three months ago.

This has become the biggest festival between me and her.

May 10, rain

In fact, I don't think my writing is very good.

After all, this is just a simple diary, not some painstaking masterpiece.

I just want to simply record the story between me and her.

Although this is just my own story.

I also want to write it down.

In the future, when I get old, I can still open this diary and read the stories in it word by word.

This true and beautiful story.

This is a heartbeat that belongs to me alone.

September 7, sunny

What day is today, I remember very clearly.

I just can't remember clearly.

After all, there were all kinds of news about today on the mobile phone and various software the day before.

Naturally, I have no one who can celebrate Qixi Festival.

So very simply, I went directly to her house to find her.

The two of us stayed at her house to eat, watch movies and play games. The two single nobles had a very good time.

In the past few years, she herself has no one she likes.

I knew from the beginning that she was not going to like anyone.

Because gods don't bow their heads to look down on mortals.

December 12, snow

It's the end of the year again.

This year's snow is very big, and it is also very beautiful.

I want to look for her to watch the snow together.

but I do not have.

Because my wish will never come true.

Yes, she left.

Now I can write this sentence very calmly.

It seemed that the heart-piercing despair and pain in my heart did not exist.

It was a very ordinary day. I was drinking with her at home, and she said to me in the same clear voice as before: I'm leaving.

The voice was very calm, just a simple notification.

It was like saying what she wanted to eat today, instead of informing me of such a news that I lost all feeling at that time.

I don't know how I raised my glass of wine that day and said to her calmly, "Bon voyage."

I just feel like everything is going away from me.

I seem to have lost all perception of the world in an instant, and I fell into eternal darkness.

I overestimated myself.

I thought I could deal with it calmly.

But when things came to an end, I realized that when facing her, I would never be at peace.

Those unwavering heartbeats are just my orders to warn myself not to cross the line. I can control my behavior, let myself retreat to the position of a friend, and even be content with it all.

But I can't accept her leaving.

She left so suddenly and so fast.

I thought that when I was getting old, I would still occasionally see her pure appearance and indifferent and lazy look, chat with her occasionally, brew her favorite wine, and be with her. She went to a delicious restaurant to eat together.

The parting was so inexplicable and swift that I was not prepared for it.

But I had to force myself to be ready.

Because I understand that it is impossible to change the fact of reversal.

She left me.

And it's permanent.

……

September 7, sunny

This is the last time I will write a diary.

I will seal the diary forever.

I picked up the pen and wrote down the secrets that have never been spoken or written on any paper in the past few years.

I love you.

Truly devout, nirvana eternal.

　This book is over here, and I should write something similar to Fanwai in the future. (Maybe there is only one chapter, hahaha) Thanks to all the little angels who came here, really appreciate it!Let me know that there are still readers who like this book to subscribe and support the original version. I love you, all readers who left me comments, voted for me, thank you for allowing me to persist until today and finish writing this book.

　　My readers are all the best little angels and cuties, thank you all.

　　
　
(End of this chapter)