Siren Blade

Chapter 22
What Qingniao was reading might be a confidential document. When I sat across from her and called her name, she raised her face in a trance, put the document away in a hurry as soon as she saw me, and asked if I had read it. arrive.Since it is such an important document, don't read it in a place like a restaurant where people come and go, I can't help but think so, but it is not the first time that she has been offline from time to time.Such a person is in charge of supervising me, is her superior really assured?

She raised her fist and coughed in front of her face, quickly adjusted her expression to work mode, and took out another document from her bag.It probably recorded the security bureau's psychological analysis of me and the questions she should ask, etc. While she was asking, she also recorded my answers, or ticked or crossed them.The files are also laid flat on the desktop, and I don't care if I see them or get stained with food juice.As she puts it, Q&As like this are nothing more than procedural behavior.

"...So, what is your impression of her, of the Siren now?" she asked, "Has it changed? Do you think she is scary?"

Without thinking, I said, "No, I've said it many times, I'm not brainwashed, I really love it."

"True love... Whether she can understand the concept of love is unknown. And you should stop saying such things. If you talk too much, maybe someone will believe it." She said, "If you don't feel She is terrifying, so what else can you feel from her now? The instinctive affection for a creature that looks like the opposite sex? The family-like feelings that arise from years of intimate relationship? Or... Maternity?"

"Motherhood?" I asked in disbelief.

"Yes, this is the speculation of the psychoanalyst in the Bureau. She also seemed to think that this speculation is quite outrageous, so she just mentioned it to me." She said, "But it doesn't seem unreasonable when you think about it carefully. I It’s not that the siren has maternal nature in the sense of social common sense, but you can see that your body has been greatly transformed by her, and some of her nature has been mixed in. So in a physiological sense, you can indeed see her as your reborn mother.”

"Is that so?" Did I actually try to find traces of motherhood in "it"?That is too absurd, and it is no wonder that even the psychoanalyst who speculates like this feels unconvinced.

"Just think of it as Joe...just think of it as that psychoanalyst's wild thinking, there's no need to be so serious." Qingniao laughed and shook her head, and simply changed the subject, "Speaking of which, are you still unable to desire normal opposite sex?"

I also encountered this problem in the dream. In the dream, I couldn’t understand why I would lose my desire for all the opposite sex after having the “weird dream”, and I didn’t know the origin of the “weird dream” itself.

Now the truth is clear, the so-called "strange dream" is my strong memory of "it", even in a dream state, it will subconsciously rise to the surface; and the loss of desire for all the opposite sex is because of the relationship between me and "it". The "abnormal habit" that the close contact between them is too long and frequent, and it is terminally ill.

I think this is an abnormal hobby that I had originally, and I finally realized it on the day I met "it"; and the psychological report of the Security Bureau believes that this abnormal hobby that violates the normal concept of human ethics is "" It "has been implanted forcefully into my brain tissue from the outside with evil magic power.

"Didn't you say that you had a crush on Ruan Wenzhu before, and you had a strong feeling for her?" Qingniao told me at that time, "This shows that you are originally a person with a healthy addiction to the opposite sex. Demon's fault."

To this, my answer was, "It just means that my abnormal and normal were coexisting at the time, and during the years of living with 'it', the inflated abnormal excluded the normal, that's all. "

For my inner world, my love and desire for "it" must be based on the fact that the source is myself.Once you start to suspect that you have been brainwashed, you start to suspect that you have been implanted with external thoughts, you will definitely absolve yourself of the crime in your inner world.I know myself so well, I will definitely do this.But what a shameless act, and my feelings about "it" would be a lie.

But the reason why I resisted so much was because it seemed too sweet a possibility for me.If I'm being manipulated, I can somewhat forgive myself.

Am I brainwashed or not?
Do you wish you had been brainwashed?Or do you wish you hadn't been brainwashed?

Once I go deep into this topic, my thoughts will become chaotic, and even my reason will gradually become strange in the chaos.

"Yes, I still can't produce that kind of desire." I answered Jade Bird's previous question.

"This is a bit bad... Whether you believe in your claims or mine, your hobbies are messed up by 'it'. In this way, won't you only be able to feel it from monsters in the future? Are you physically impulsive?"

"It makes sense."

She deliberately teased me in an unscrupulous tone, "So, do you want Sister Qingniao to help you correct it?"

"no."

"The tone is so cold suddenly! Sister, I'm a little hurt."

I feel that something is wrong with her today, and she can't choose what to say when she jokes.And it seems that she forgot to maintain the sense of distance with me. Has she forgotten what I have done in the past few years?

In addition, although she calls herself "sister", she is actually not a few years older than me.

Maybe it's younger than me, but even if it's younger than me, it's probably a year or two younger at most.It's hard to say, many women of this age like and are good at being tender, even if they look like a female college student, maybe they are just good at creating a youthful atmosphere, but they have been working in the workplace for several years.

Seeing that I didn't cooperate with the joke, she also restrained herself, fell silent for a while, and asked again: "Are you...do you still want to die?"

"No. I haven't tried to do that these days."

"You just want to die in another way." She pointed out bluntly, "It was the same before, and you actually proposed to use it as bait to lure out the old bones? This is not in a dream. There's only one."

"Don't worry, I have a sense of proportion." I mentioned it briefly, and then asked, "Compared to this, I have a question I want to ask you."

"what is the problem?"

"Didn't you say before that the remains of 'it' have been cremated?" I finally asked, "Then... where will those ashes be placed later?"

"Ash...the way the Security Bureau handles the ashes of monsters is different from the way it handles human ashes. The latter will be buried, but the former will usually be used as spells or rituals, or as materials for certain items. And' It's..." She said while thinking, "It has been discarded now, and I don't know the specific procedures, either it is landfilled, or thrown into the river or ocean. Because it is an unknown monster, if The Security Service would not consider it material without necessity."

"According to general logic, shouldn't it be rare and valuable just because it is unknown?"

"If the logic of the secular society and the logic of scientists are used, unknown creatures do have higher research value. But in the world of warlocks, there are countless unknown things, and the more unknown the more dangerous, so warlocks in this regard It has formed a value that is completely opposite to the secular society." She said, "I also think this kind of value is not very good, but I am not a researcher of secret knowledge, and as a layman, it is always difficult to guide the thinking of insiders. Give pointers."

"So that's how it is." I had no choice but to accept her statement, and at the same time laughed at myself, what happened to me.At first I wanted to see the body of "it" again, but I felt that seeing it would only lead to disillusionment. Later, I couldn't help asking about the whereabouts of the body; but now I don't even let the ashes go. Can only give up.

And even more ironically, I still want to see "it" again.But where can I go to satisfy my desire?
A place pops up in my mind, without warning and with reason.

unnamed mountain.

Where I met "it".

If I go there, maybe I will feel the breath of "it" a little bit, and cut off my last souvenir.

The next morning, I threw down my positioning bracelet and went to Wuming Mountain.
-
I ended my memories of the previous few days and continued to walk up the mountain path.

Even though it was a mountain road after five years of absence, there was not much feeling of strangeness, because I also walked like this in a dream not long ago.Walking like this sometimes blurs the difference between dreams and reality, and I feel like I am walking in an illusory time and space, and my feet are not firmly on the ground.

Maybe I was really dreaming. In fact, there are no law enforcement warlocks and security bureaus, and there is no "it" and "blue bird". After that, I will wake up in another "real world".But who will I be when I wake up again?Maybe I will find myself still hungry and falling in the dark mountain forest. Whether I am a college student or a demon, it is just the fantasy of the unfortunate boy Li Duo when he died of starvation.

But that's not a bad thing, at least the devil was never born.

The original self and the front table were killed near here. I heard that the front table was finally found by the search and rescue team, and I don't know what happened now.I liked her before, but if she knew that she was liked by the Qiqi serial killer, how would she react?It hurts to say that, but I'm curious about her possible reaction.

As I thought about it, I actively deviated from the mountain path and headed for the depths of the forest.

The purpose of this time is to "revisit the old place", "re-feel the breath of 'it'", and "cut off the last commemoration of it", and others must be confused.To feel the breath, where can I feel it?Cut off the souvenir, how far can it be considered to cut off the souvenir?
In fact, I have quite a clear material goal, which is the giant egg that once produced "it".

Outcome... that might be wrong too, I'm not sure if "it" was actually born there, or just placed itself in that egg for some reason.Moreover, the giant egg may have been found and recovered by the Security Bureau first. Even if it hadn't, five years had passed, and the giant egg had probably all rotted, or been eaten and wiped clean by passing wild animals.

But that's better than staying in the house and thinking wildly.Perhaps because of the loss of the blow of "it", I have been immersed in my inner world these days, and my previous mobility has disappeared, which is not even as good as the me in the dream.After that, no matter where I want to end up, I must first cheer up.

While cheering for myself, I went deep into the forest.Suddenly, a thought that had never been thought of emerged.

Speaking of which... why did I meet "it" on the mountain?
This is not a nitpicking question, but rather an important one.

The interrogator told me that although "it" is an unknown monster, it has many characteristics similar to those of the sea monster.Moreover, in the process of getting along with "it", I often perceive the impression similar to marine life from it. The body of "it" is always soft and wet, cold and slimy, it really doesn't look like a creature living on dry land.

Even if you want to live on land, it should be a place near the sea.And here is not only land, but also mountains, and it is not close to the sea.Although there is a lake at the foot of the mountain, it is only a small lake, and it is still in a crowded area of ​​the scenic spot, so it is really not a place where monsters can inhabit.

Before I met "it"...

What the hell happened...to make "it" appear there?
With this major question in mind, I searched for the place where I encountered it in the mountains and forests.This is not a simple job, it is not easy to find such a featureless place in such a huge mountain.

But I'm patient enough, and I'll keep looking until I find it.

Having said that, I also vaguely have a mysterious awareness, maybe it will be useless for me to search for it this time.

Unknowingly, the time came in the evening, and the sun gradually turned into afterglow.

I was still wandering in the mountains and forests, feeling like a demon who always wandered in the lost mountains and forests in my dreams.If he, who is like a killing machine, also has his own thinking, is it possible that he is wandering in the mountains and forests with the same purpose as me?Just as I was thinking this way, there was a human voice in the distance——a scream.

I immediately followed the sound and quickly saw what happened.I saw a young woman with a ponytail running away in a panic in the mountains and forests. She was being chased, and when I saw this scene, she was about to be caught.The person who chased her was a man in his 30s, holding an old and yellowed thigh bone in his hand.

"Old Bone!" I called out his name immediately.

Immediately, his eyes caught me, and the movement stopped.The young woman took the opportunity to run forward for a certain distance, and I quickly rushed to her side, and protected her in front of her without hesitation.

"Devil Li Duo!" Old Gu stared at me with hatred.

I responded tit for tat, "I've said it all, don't call me the devil Li Duo."

(End of this chapter)