20 years of underworld

Ji Shengyu, He Shengliang

These two pretentious kings will finally meet today. Maybe it is the greatest misfortune in the history of human pretentiousness, or it is a great fortune for Sun Dawei and Huang Laoxie to be born in the same city at almost the same time

Outside the window, the snow has stopped, and the north wind is howling. Inside the dilapidated dumpling restaurant, a raging fire is burning

A literati once said: There are three realms in life. The first realm is "the westerly wind withered the tree last night, I went up to the west building alone, looking at the end of the world." Makes people haggard”, and the third state is “I searched for it thousands of times in the crowd, but when I suddenly looked back, that person was in a dimly lit place”

Ergou thinks: Pretentiousness also has these three realms

"Hello." Huang Laoxie lightly brushed off the snowflakes on his body, and looked at Sun Dawei with a smile, his eyes were blurred

"Long admiration, old evil." Sun Dawei responded with the same charming smile. In fact, Sun Dawei had been thinking of two sentences, but he couldn't think of them for a while, so he could only say the dry word "Jiu Yang"

In fact, since the moment the eyes of these two people met, there has been a collision of hearts, and they cherish each other. In fact, what they both wanted to say at the same time was "I don't need to be a million households, I hope to know Han Jingzhou." But neither of them could say this sentence , this is the loss of being uneducated, the nine-year compulsory education is not popularized "Guwen Guanzhi"

"Do you want mashed garlic?"

"No," they both said in unison.

"Eating garlic will have a peculiar smell." Huang Laoxie said softly, "Yes!"

"What wine do you want?"

"The unblended raw white wine in the winery"

"Good! Good wine! Those who really know how to drink only drink this"

This is the first level of pretentious behavior. "Last night, the west wind withered the tree, and I went up to the west building alone, looking at the end of the world." In this pretentious realm, the person who pretends to be forced needs to show taste and uniqueness in form "Western wind withered tree" shows that the two of them are restless and uneasy before starting the real negotiation, and they have not yet entered the real high-level level of pretentiousness.

"I'm a friend of Mr. Li's. I'm here today to make friends with you."

"One more friend, one more road"

"There were indeed some misunderstandings between us before, but it's okay, we will be friends from now on"

"You're right, the past is over, but your elder brother started stabbing Xiao Ji, this..."

"Tudou is currently hospitalized in Beijing, the mouth of the fifth brother was smashed, brother Li was also chopped twice, you, brother Huang, and I are still on crutches, Dawei, look, is the revenge similar? gone?"

"Brother Huang, as the saying goes, the grievance has its head, and the debt has its owner." Brother Li stabbed Xiao Ji, and the matter was always caused by him."

"Then what do you mean?"

"Let Brother Li apologize to Xiao Ji, since we will be friends in the future, it's no big deal to accompany him."

"this………………"

This is the second level of pretentiousness, "the belt is getting wider and you will not regret it, and you will be haggard because of Yixiao." In this pretentious realm, the two have completely entered the state, and pretending to be acting wholeheartedly is for the sake of each other. A person who pretends to be selfless and distracted must use that kind of dedicated, stubborn, and never regretful spirit to try to convince the other party

"If you don't want to apologize to Xiao Ji, it's fine."

"how to say?"

"Then continue to fight again." Sun Dawei said with a smile. At this moment, Sun Dawei's tone is as if he is the Chinese People's Liberation Army, and Li Laozhu is an urban management officer, and his strength is not at the same level.

"This...I'll go back and discuss it with Brother Li!"

This is the highest level of pretentiousness, which is the third level. "People search for him thousands of times, and suddenly look back, but that person is in a place where the lights are dim." Of course, the premise is that this pretentious person must be confident that he has the ability to do this thing that he can't do at all. So, this level of realm is very difficult, but As soon as he said the relaxed "then continue to fight", Sun Dawei was the first to reach it, and suddenly looked back.

Sun Dawei left, smiling. There were not many pedestrians on the street. Walking under the dim street lights, a sense of desolation and loneliness suddenly appeared in his heart.

Master, how many people can solve the loneliness in Dugu Qiubai's heart who is always lonely?

This, only those who have really climbed to the top can truly understand

Twenty years later, there are still many people who love to pretend in Ergou's circle of life, but in terms of realm, compared with Sun Dawei back then, they are far behind, and even compared with Huang Laoxie, there is still a certain gap between them It is roughly between "Last night the westerly wind withered the tree, I went up to the west building alone, looking at the end of the world" and "The belt is getting wider and I will not regret it, and I will be haggard for Yixiao".

The specific manifestations of their pretentiousness are in three aspects: dialogue, diet, and hobbies.

1. There must be English in the dialogue. If you remove these English words in the dialogue, it is basically impossible to understand what the Chinese wants to explain.

For example: "Alex, I really appreciate your approach. I don't want to influence you too much on this matter, but you must have your own insight." Ergou is basically influenced by such conversations every day for a long time. , Er Gou has also become like this, so Er Gou is not pretending to be coercive, but just being forced

2. Absolutely don’t eat KFC and other fast food, and only eat Vietnamese food, Thai food, etc. No matter how good the coffee at Starbucks is, people won’t drink it, you have to grind it yourself

People like Ergou who eat an egg burrito bought on the street for two yuan every morning and fast food for eight yuan at noon are definitely the object of ridicule. There is no way, Ergou loves this

3. I like to watch movies that I don’t understand at all, and do some sports that I don’t even like myself

For example, when "myblueberrynight" was released a few days ago, they would go to watch it together, and then comment unanimously: "It's really good!" Ergou couldn't help but also went to the cinema to watch it. The dog once wondered if he was too vulgar, and only wanted to watch movies like "Fearless", "I want the official of the police", "007" and so on, so Ergou mustered up his courage , I dared to ask those friends who said this movie was good, and asked them what it was good for Ergou: Of course, it is possible that no one can say it, this movie is indeed too good to describe

They define their own pretentious behavior as petty bourgeoisie, and think it is a kind of taste. When pretense has become a habit, it becomes a style.

Posers are everywhere, but there are few who have reached the peak. Compared with Sun Dawei and Huang Laoxie and other ill-educated pretenders, these educated people lose their due sensibility and innocence when pretending to be coercive , thinking too much when pretending to be aggressive, it is difficult to reach the peak. Sun Dawei and Huang Laoxie have no tricks to win and have tricks, just like Guo Jing who doesn't know the rhythm on Peach Blossom Island broke Huang Yaoshi's Xiaosheng